₦airaland Forum

ubl6: If you can only know the condition they found themselves after their deaths, you will never wish to be with them.

Did some evil psychopathic god get angry and do something horrible to them?

Not long ago I saw a short, made up diary of some man who dies and goes to Islamic heaven. I wish I could find it again, but it was something like this:

Day 1 in heaven: had relations with several virgins. It was a bit frustrating because they didn't know what they were doing, moving around too much, squealing and knew nothing of oral pleasure.

Day 7: these virgins don't learn ANYTHING. The very next time it is the same thing all over again, moving around, unable to get into a rhythm, no sense of how to pleasure a man. It's ridiculous that they never gain any experience. Where are the sluts? Maybe I can take a field trip to the other place?

Year 1: I don't know if I can take this any longer. These virgins are boring me to tears but I can't do anything about it. I'm stuck with this for eternity, day after day. The wine would be a nice diversion but wine in heaven does not cause intoxication.

Year 10: Is it possible to commit suicide in heaven, because I see no other way out of this.....

If the Bible and Quran are the word of god then I for one am not impressed. I have many books on my shelf that are more concise, more consistent, better organized, better expressed and with fewer contradictions and errors than the aforementioned 'holy books'.

In his now-lost book "The Prophets' Fraudulent Tricks", one of my Persian heroes, doctor Muhammad al-Razi (854-925 AD) said, regarding the Quran (but could apply to the Bible as well):

"You claim that the evidentiary miracle is present and available, namely, the Quran. You say: "Whoever denies it, let him produce a similar one." Indeed, we shall produce a thousand similar, from the works of rhetoricians, eloquent speakers and valiant poets, which are more appropriately phrased and state the issues more succinctly. They convey the meaning better and their rhymed prose is in better meter. … By God what you say astonishes us! You are talking about a work which recounts ancient myths, and which at the same time is full of contradictions and does not contain any useful information or explanation. Then you say: "Produce something like it"‽

And the Arab philosopher Abul al-Ma'arri (973-1058) wrote:

"Do not suppose the statements of the prophets to be true; they are all fabrications. Men lived comfortably till they came and spoiled life. The sacred books are only such a set of idle tales as any age could have and indeed did actually produce."

I would love to have met these guys.

A great page of atheist quotes, in case you wanted some good light reading:

http://www.bandoli.no/sayings.htm

My favorites on that page:

"Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day;
Give him a religion, and he'll starve to death
while praying for a fish."

"Faith is the determination to remain ignorant in the face of all evidence that you are ignorant."

"There are two classes of men:
intelligent men without religion,
and religious men without intelligence."

I'm always reminded of a picture of a man leading an elephant with a rope. The elephant easily has the power to run away or to kill the man, but he doesn't because the man has used psychological techniques to persuade the elephant that he is its master. So the elephant passively obeys. Such it is with rulers leading the subjects around on a leash. It's much easier to control people with religion than with brute force, as the man and elephant demonstrate.

So yeah, the people who formed organized religion were the smartest.

I have to admit, I laughed out loud when I saw Ray Comfort's name. I actually continued reading and laughed some more.

Akin d archi: @beejaay... Sorry, but I don't know where u got ur idea from that a thing has to be forced on u before its a fitnah, but what I meant by fitnah in my post was trials I.e is this thread causing more good or more avenues for people to be misled?
Well this is me dropping my quota about the "quran needed to be learned in arabic" myth. I listened to the tafsir of surah humazah(104) by the Nouman Ali Khan, he spent more than 30 minutes explaining the first word of the first ayat which was "waylul", the common translation is "woe to", it is obvious that one wud be doing himself a great injustice by saying the arabic word is just as meaningful as d english closest translation, cuz most of thes words are DEEP. Surah Asr(103) which happens to be one of the shortest surah needed 5 sessions each lasting over 1 hour, that's about 5hours to explain 3 sentences....I doubt the english translations wud require the same time
Further more, the memorisation of the quran has been a major means by which Allah has preserved it.
And @usermane, there seems to be a loophole somewhere. If u say the quran need not be learned in arabic, but it is glaring dat it is easier to learn in arabic and according to statistics it is impossible to learn in any other language (since there is no known record of any one who memorised the entire quran's translation), doesn't that kinda mean u are indirectly discouraging muslims from trying to memorise the quran?
What I think is whether or not it was decreed that d quran is only quran when it is in arabic is beside the point, u just gotta weigh the options (assuming u are like me who doesn't understand arabic), its either u learn the quran in arabic u don't understand at all, or u learn the quran in arabic and then learn the translation of those surah as well as listen to knowledgeable scholars disect these arabic words full of meaning in so many ways, or u learn the quran in a language that carries maybe about 1/10th the original message, or u just don't learn the quran at all. If there is any other option besides learning the classical arabic and then learning the quran that u av in mind pls share, but I know which of these I am choosing regardless of whether learning the quran is compulsory or not. Asalam alaykum

Well then if each word in the arabic Quran has that many possible meanings then it's no wonder that anyone can read into the Quran whatever they want. The Quran is therefore useless as a guidebook.

Divepen: 1. Satanists Beleive In God

stopped reading right there. You have no clue what satanists believe.

There is a hadith in Islam in which Muhammad says that 99 out of every 100 people will go to hell. He did not specify whether this was for eternity or not.

The original Bible is not in Latin, but rather Hebrew and Koine Greek. However, those languages were not accessible to the Christians of the Western Roman Empire, and previous translations into Latin had been done in a piecemeal, haphazard fashion, and so once Christianity reached a critical mass in the west in the late 300s, a priest named (St.)Jerome was commissioned to create a single, comprehensive translation of the Bible into Latin so that people would understand it in Italy, Spain, France, etc. This version (the Vulgate) is the one that has been used by the Catholic Church ever since.

usermane: ,Thanks a lot Beejaay and Logicbwoy. I am happy at least a few persons appreciate GOD.
As for tbaba,babylolaroy,akin di archi, i am not seeking attention or here to mislead, and yes, i took my time to cook this. If i see things going contrary to Islam, i have to comment, doubting thomas will learn. I am not here to shove my findings down anybody 's throat. The truth is what i seek and those who take this thread professionaly will have no issue.

I welcome criticisms or insults from those who take things personal. Insult won't hurt me. I am glad a few persons, even non muslims have learnt a thing.

It appears that you are a Quranist, which would put you outside of Islam in the eyes of most Muslims.

In any case, I personally believe that Islam was created bit by bit over time, including the Quran, by a number of people, over 100+ years, and that Muhammad may indeed have claimed to be a sort of prophet, but that his followers created much of what was attributed to him.

What is really strange about all ancient religions is that there is virtually NO contemporary documentation of these so called great prophets. If Muhammad and Jesus were so obviously prophets (son of god?), then why is there virtual silence on the part of the people around them for 50 years? Muhammad died in 632 yet there is no historical mention of him until at least 679! Even after the Arabs took much of the eastern Byzantine empire in 637, the Byzantines mention conquests but nothing about a new religion or prophet. The earliest Qurans that are currently in existence date from around 680 or later. Why the long silence?

The same is true of Christianity. Basically nothing for 20 years or so after Jesus death (the letters of Paul) and then another 30 years before we get a biography of Jesus (Gospels). Enough time to create a myth-based religion?

Fxwarrior: As someone who spent his lifetime in village devoid of civilisation,what if I told you about America ?Would you believe me?

And if he doubted the existence of America based upon his available evidence, would you say that he deserved to be thrown into an eternal fire?

You may want to ask your psychiatrist to prescribe different medications. Certain medications are ineffective for certain people.

Awra Amba, a village in Gondar, Ethiopia, was begun about 40 years ago, and the villagers made the decision to get rid of all organized religion. No mosques or churches.

Related article here:

http://www.dw.de/ethiopian-utopian-village-goes-against-the-grain/a-17152619?maca=en-rss-en-all-1573-rdf

Your god has serious anger management issues. He needs to relax, maybe take a vacation.

Hassanamed: Instead of reading qu'ran, pipl are reading somting else, western education has over stayed its welcom,

Then stop writing in (broken) English and stop using this filthy western technology called the internet. Also stop using western weapons.

Mayany: Just dis morning i was wishing my muslim friends Happy Eid-il-Mubarak(dunno if dats d correct spellin) on Bbm,and I was told by a christian sister that am doing sumtin wrong and that muslim don't serve dsame God with us and don't believe in Jesus who is our lord and saviour etc.Thou I don't see anything wrong in wishing them well. Pls if we have Bible scholars here I would love to hear what u think?

Really now, is yahweh that petty that he is going to punish you for wishing somebody well? I realize that some Muslims feel the same way about Xmas. As an atheist I would say that Yahweh and Allah are quite childish if they get angry over this. Go ahead and wish them happy sallah; I am actually going to a friends house to celebrate and I'm convinced that Muhammad was a 419 guy.

5) The confused
--they don't really know much about their religion and it shows
--their main source of belief is in miracles (faith-healing, resurrecting the dead, bizarre coincidences)
--they don't preach because they don't know how to
--don't usually stick around very long
***how to know them
Long posts of incomprehensible gibberish; try to overwhelm you with many testimonies of 'miracles'; get angry when 'miracles' are laughed at; typically resort to threats of hell because they don't know how to do anything else.

tsidra: You think taking care of d whole world is easy Try being the class captain of a public school nd see how it works out for you?

Calling God names, if he has mean as u ar paintin him u will 6 ft under by now.

U ar so lucky am nt God u ignorant, self centerd insultive piece of sh1t!!!

Jst so u know am takin it personal

I'm sorry I had to laugh at this response. If you are offended at what you see on the internet then just turn your computer off. It's also better for your blood pressure.

You're going to get a pile of convoluted answers about how man has freewill AND god is omniscient at the same time, basically just a bunch of runaround and word games that are meaningless and unprovable (like all religion).

Either:
there is free will and god is not omniscient or
everything is predetermined or
god does not exist or does not care.

Sorry I missed the latest sermon, I was at a 3 day revival at St. Mattress, where I spent almost the entire time in worship lying on my stomach, my side, and my back. Now I'm back and inspired to live the life according to our redeemer, the Holy Comforter.

Mr Troll:

What! Oh no you didn't!

Pls if you're related to apes i'm not o. I'm oh so so too special to be related to mere apes. I come from dust! Specially custom made less than 10000 yrs ago.

Oh sorry! I stand corrected! I have seen the error of my ways. Now excuse my while I tell one of my ribs to go and prepare my supper like she is supposed to!

olumide5050: Christianity is not from judaism,the law of moses was the birth of judaism,Christianity on the other hand started after the coming,death and resurrection of Our Lord Jesus Christ. Let's for a moment assume that Christianity is from judaism,that suggest to us that some people decided to break away to form another movement. Do u therefore mean that humans that evolve from Apes decided to do so and not by natural selection again?Or some Apes gathered and had meeting to evolve while the others decided to remain Apes or perhaps forgot to attend the meeting?

I was being a bit flippant in my response. The true answer is that humans and apes have a common ancestor. Modern apes are our cousins, not our grandparents.

olumide5050: Atheist on Nairaland,pls help me reason these matters since you believe in Evolution, and since you believe science and logic can explain everything. 1.how did the following animals evolve,from where and what time line a.Dog b.ant C.all kinds of Birds D.Whales and shark,we can include all animals and plants actually
2.What are human beings likely to evolve into 3.when are we expected to see ds changes 4.Can evolution explain the several kinds of languages we have in the world.5If humans are from Apes,why do we still have some apes(ok,natural selection didn't make them evolve,pls give a better explanation here)
More questions later. Please expplain these with evolution,science and logic.

1. Do some internet research. You'll find answers to your questions.
2. No one can say what humans are 'likely' to evolve into. Natural selection and genetic drift are not always so obvious.
3. We don't know.
4. Evolution and the development of languages have nothing to do with each other. Different languages are simply a product of groups of people being separated from one another.
5. If Christianity came from Judaism, why are there still Jews?

You forgot some things that your god hates:

--Divorce
--charging interest on loans
--covetousness
--lusting after a woman who is not your wife
--working on Sunday (or Saturday depending on how you interpret your god's calendar)

However I am glad that you did not put slavery on your list of things that god hates because slavery is perfectly acceptable to him.

Rhymeyjohn: Atheists are those who believe there is no God/god. It takes an omniscient ability to entirely say 'there is not God/god', no atheist has this ability .It rather shows atheism as a believe system, just like many others. Atheists, if you have the chance to ask GOD one serious question, what would that be? ask here

If I starting asking 'god' some questions, I'd visit a psychiatrist to get some Thorazine.

2 Kings 2: 23-24 A prophet sensitive about his baldness

23: From there Elisha went up to Bethel. As he was walking along the road, some boys came out of the town and jeered at him. “Get out of here, baldy!” they said. “Get out of here, baldy!” 24: He turned around, looked at them and called down a curse on them in the name of the Lord. Then two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the boys.

The poison of religion is not just having effects in Nigeria. The place where I am currently working, a major city in West Africa, ran out of water two weeks ago because of a malfunctioning pump at the reservoir. According to the news, last Friday during the sermon at the city's main mosque, the Imam said that the water failure is 'exclusively of divine origin' and that the way to avoid such further water problems is to become more pious and pray more often!!!

MMCCHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

Ajibam: Psalm 14:1ESV The fool says in his heart, “There is no God.”

Stopped reading right there.

I categorically reject theistic gods of every religion.

Though I lack belief in it, I can accept the idea of a pantheistic god. Everything else to me seems unreasonable.

Owo Lee: Islam is not a religion of Muhammed, muhammed didn't create it, and not named after muhammed unlike other religion...
Muhammed didn't just fight a war, there was a reason for the war.
In the bible, why did Jesus Christ, the Rock of Old Testament Israel (1 Corinthians 10:4), allow the Israelites to fight wars in the Old Testament?
Because of the hardness of their hearts and their unbelief, God allowed the Israelites to fight most of their own battles...
Just like the believers then, they were so minor, the major religion then in mekkah and the world were the jews(unbeliever). The muslims then had to defend themselves...Muhammed didn't intentionally fight any war except commanded by Allah to defend his people...

Then where did the Quran come from? How was it brought to earth? Oh yes, it all came from Muhammad and Muhammad said that god told him that he is a prophet and that everyone must obey Muhammad....pretty nice deal if you were Muhammad, he convinced all these people to obey him blindly just because he said to. What a scam. He is no better than these evangelist preachers.