₦airaland Forum

ogugua88: And then later she'll be snapping photos with hungry, homeless children in the slums of Colombia or South Africa, telling us "she's devastated".

When you die, please make sure they preserve your brain. You'r so intelligent

cotton101: sometimes when i wake up and realise its monday morning i feel like crying as well

nice one

ferhyntorlah: Whatever it is that caused the loss, confront it and deal with it. That is how you can overcome it; confront your fears and conquer it.

Also, words are important. Everytime you wake up in the morning, look at yourself in the mirror and begin to say great and positive things about yourself.

This is an exercise for you; do it for the next one month and see what happens. Positive words and thinking go a long way to boost self confidence.

Say the words and start imagining the words being fulfilled in your life.

Goodluck!

Callotti: By confronting the object of your loss of confidence. . . .and proving it DEAD WRONG.
Up to you!

Alternatively, you may want to enhance your most dominant, positive traits and BUILD on them for a MOST POWERFUL SHINE!!!!

Remember, you can't try to be like others, YOU CAN ONLY BE YOURSELF AND MORE!!!!!

Fantastic, the key is - CONFRONT IT, CONFRONT IT, CONFRONT IT.

I remember the first(and only time) I had a major car accident.

Almost everyone told me to get a driver, at least for long journeys. But I ensured that once the car got back on the road, the first thing I did was to travel along the same route where I had the accident in the first place.

There's no way, I'll live my life afraid of driving myself on long trips. It worked like a charm. A year later, I did a 32 hour trip by road alone.


however, there is a flip side - as Kobojunkie stated, We do not have the full information yet. Cos actually if the loss of self confidence is caused by Negative people - People who belittle you, then in this case, its better to stay away from them and surround yourself with positive people and positive thoughts.

Siena: In as much as I'm not an advocate of capital punishment, this guy is a convicted armed robber. He didn't kill his victim, but would you guys rather wait till he did? Kidnapping in some state in North America carry the Death Penalty. Bear in mind, not all kidnappings are carried out with weapons. The sentence is based upon a kidnapper unlawfully depriving one or more individuals of their freedom, regardless of a ransom being involved, or not.

In countries where the Death Penalty is practiced, armed robbers are executed IF convicted of armed robbery. Weapons could be knives, daggers, guns or even toy guns. If you hold up a gas station or a householder with a toy gun, and you're caught, you'll be tried for armed robbery. And if you're convicted, are liable to be put to death. It wouldn't matter that the gun used was a toy, a fake, or even an empty real gun. It still served it's purpose, as far as the law's concerned.

An armed robber is an armed robber, regardless of if he / she kill his / her victims, or not.

You just nailed it bro,

Nobody could have put it in a better way

@DanJohn,

I admire your intelligence.

Very analytical and detailed. Wish we can have more Nigerians with your kind of aptitude.


Hope you don't mind if I ask what course you studied and what do you do (as in work) ?

Etemma1: Bio-data

Your bio-data which consists of your date of birth, sex and state of origin are not necessarily your most important details. Infact, it could serve as a disadvantage. Should you apply for a particular vacancy and you are past the age requirement, if your age is the first thing a potential employer sees, you are likely to be disqualified even before your CV is given a proper appraisal. So it’s best to keep those details at the tail end of your CV.


Adenike Fadina is the Project Manager for Nigerian lifestyle site, www.pulse.com.ng. She has several years of experience in the Nigerian Media/PR industry and is passionate about empowering the Nigerian job seeker with the right tools to improving their job search process.

source:http://jobfinder.com.ng/blog/2012/12/05/the-cv-that-works-in-nigeria-adenike-fadina/

tpapi: Hiding ur date of birth at d bottom of ur cv wil not help matters,wat employers luk for firstly is ur dob irespective of ur esperience n sch,especially wen there is age requirement n

You're right Tpapi, The OP was spot on aside from the quoted above.

When you submit your CV (especially when you did not do it in person )

There are three very important things employers want to find out immediately.


Who they are dealing with as in male or female (call it sexism if you will but its true)

Your Date of Birth.

And if in Nigeria , your ethnicity - yeah you heard me right. So your state of origin really matters. Whether it works against you or for you is another issue.

But you making it difficult for employers to find that information is a big minus. Business executives are very busy people and do not consider your CV a novella.

I have had the misfortune to access a candidate with such a CV at some point and what I asked him was simple - If you know this is one information I'll have much interest in seeing, why hide it ?

Amongst those that are alive ,

Our national figures seem to be sportsmen.

They are the only ones whose names are met with approval in all the regions of the country, in the cities , villages et al and also outside Nigeria.

My pick of the pack - Of course [size=13pt]Augustine Azuka Okocha[/size]

CosmicJames: Agreed. Right now I have a perfect opportunity to yahoo the world from Nigeria as a Nigerian but I refuse because I'm not a criminal and can't be one. But let's face the truth, our government should help us.

Nigeria is not business enabled!

Ask Seun Osewa that you mentioned and he will tell you what struggle he has to face in the early days of NL with regard to power supply. (That struggle has not stop till date)

How many factories have closed down, an how many cannot start because they can't generate enough energy to power their businesses which is a major cause of unemployment in this country?

We are not asking for too much; let our government provide just the basic infrastructures and Nigeria will experience the change we are looking for.

You raised valid points

cdamsel: its either he typed it or he stole d pix,cos I can see d red line underneath those words showing it was snapped 4m a PC,who is decieving who?

You'r very observant and intelligent

pekelepekele: One thing Nigeria government do not know is this . A country that doesn't care for the youth or the elders , a country where you are celebrated when you steal billions and lot of people keep dieing at different hospitals because they can't pay their bills . A stupid country that hell fire is better than , You shouldn't be surprised seeing different kind of behaviors . Yahoo Yahoo is not good but let me ask this question who among the Yahoo boys during his childhood will say it is Yahoo he wants to be doing in the future? It is this God damned country that is turning people to criminals many people are willing to read and behave well but there is no support at all from the Government.

Ordinary stable electricity we don't have , I read on NL here the way people were saluting one man called OBJ a man youths were suppose to do a private meeting and storm his house and burn him and his entire family to death.

To hell with anyone that accuses Yahoo boys again am not into it but hmm he no easy for poor man pikin ooo!!! . If you are born with silver spoon in your mouth Give thanks to the Lord.

If an army point ak47 to Bill gate forehead and another army point another ak47 to a street beggar forehead. If both army shoot na die both of dem go die oo. ORIOKUORILO wake up Nigerian youths these people are eating our future but still arresting and killing the youths for using alternative way to make money.

Nigeria situation now is FIGHT NOW OR DIE LATER

I sorry sorry oo , I sorry for Afica .
I sorry sorry oo , I sorry for Nigeria!!!. ---- Fela Baba RIP

Keep deceiving yourself
No godammed country is turning people into criminals. CRIMINALS are CRIMINALS because they are CRIMINALS.

The situation in Nigeria is extremely terrible, agreed but
then come to think of it -
Are we the poorest country in the world ?
Is the employment rate in Nigeria the worst ?
Is the Nigerian Naira the most devalued ?

Then why are we committing crime left , right , centre like devils and some people are here justifying it in the name of what's not.

The question is from whence did our leaders come from ? Pluto ?

They came from the midst of crime justifying individuals like we have on this thread.

Seun Osewa came from a poor background and is and extremely smart techie ? Why is he not using his intelligence to commit internet fraud (simple because he is not a criminal !!!).

And one thing that punctures all these, it is the government that caused it argument is - Why is it always committed by a section of the country ?

You hardly ever, ever hear a Northerner involved in internet fraud and yet that is arguably the poorest region in the country.
(Agreed, Northerners have their own problems too, but that is a topic for another day).


We should all rise up to condemn this exceeding greed that is eating us up as a people. (I just hope very soon people/Nairaland peeps will not start justifying kidnapping and armed robbery)

The corruption of the so called leaders is inexcusable, so is the level of criminality amongst the youth. I used to think that youths are supposed to be leaders of tomorrow ??

Was Seun a Millionaire when he started nairaland ?

Now I know nairaland aint a blog but they have similar business models. You need to have a niche and be able to stay current and relevant. Have access to THE RIGHT people not neccessarily money.

Heard Linda was broke when she started.

@poster,
Using perfume is definitely a sin but its not the worst. The worst of all sins is STUPIDITY.


and while you are at it, please refrain from using toothpastes until we are able to clarify all these serious issues. and of course you know that soaps are also no go area. Most of them are scented ! Only use water for bathing. We must ensure that we do not sin.

this thread makes me feel sorry for Nigeria nay africa.

If our intellects and future can think like this then hope becomes dim.


Anyway Maclatunji offers a glimmer of hope, in the midst of all the spiritual mumbo-jumbo, he has been able to inject a bit of rationale.

Donxavier: This is amazing. At OP I'm a small boy so I don't have experience in lady matters as such but I strongly believe if you are patient enough you will definitely find a lady that is humble enough that you can start a family with. I agree with Queensmith, using money to get you out of this emotional mess is a way out, but definitely not the best way and challenges are meant to teach us something and develop us into better human beings. You need to sort out yourself and summon the inner courage to go thru the ebbs of life that include dealing with nasty women and all the baggage that comes with romantic relationships.

Whatever you decide I wish you the best.

You might be young but you have the wisdom of the ancients

sauer: See stupidity rearing its head again. You must be a cretin!!!
What's stopping anyone from reacting to the pains of a previous relationship, so long as he hasn't put the tab on you or anyone!? See investigation indeed! What's wrong with Nigerians again? Oh My! Why should it be any of your concern if he deems this the better approach to follow after his disappointments?

Oga, abeg take am easy.
Na on top this matter you dey call me cretin ?? or are you just practicing your english language writing skills ?

You ask why it is any of my concern ? oh, you forgot that I (or anybody else) didn't force him to open a thread on a public forum in the first place.

Am also concerned about why you are so concerned about my concern for the OP's predicament.


Even the OP never insult me for my comment. Which one come be your own bros ?

I did a little investigation and realised that the poster is just reacting to the pains of his previous 8 year relationship.
It might even make a meaning to his fear/hatred of Calabars/akwa ibom - the previous babe might be from that area ! who knows

See one of his posts below

stpat1: My fiancee snubs for hours and sometimes for days after a disagreement. It take a lot of talking and coercing from me to bring her out of that mood. Even if the problem is from her, it will take while before she realises it and apologise.

Is this normal? Or am I too blind to see something? Will it be unreasonable to call off a wedding which is in 4 months time? I love her and have known her for 8 years now but its a habit I've always detested.

I really don't know the action to take now. Please your adulterated candid opinion is wanted. Pour it out and tell me what you'd do if you were in my shoes. Lash me I won't get mad at you. Lol

I need to take a decision is the 4 hours before this chick drives me crazy. I'll rather painfully let her go now that regret it in years to come.

My advice, don't narrow your view of women to your experience with one or two .

Search far , search deep. With God on your side, you'll find a good one and forget about all these loony ideas

well to the topic,


The last time I 'felt' like crying was earlier in the year, when my dad's corpse was being lowered into the grave and the sand was being used to gradually cover it up (I still feel the chills anytime I remember that scene).

Everybody around me was crying . . sorry make that 'wailing' . As the man of the house I had to be strong so I just had to bone face and I started calculating the names of all the major towns between abuja and lagos to distract me.
Gwagwalada, sheda, abaji, lokoja, okenne, ogori magongo, lampese, ibillo . . . . . . .

It worked like a charm

freecocoa: I was actually trekking, one car just sped past me raising so much dust\sand.
I thought "shey na cos I never buy car" and the tears just started flowing.

You should have said all along that you dont have a ride ?


Oya come let me buy one for you .

You need to stop trekking, its not good for the sole of your shoes !!

afam4eva: Ohh i understand what you mean. But you must run forward with your legs forward and your head region backward.

Sure, very right about the head part. that's where the forward pull is most felt, hence the reason why most fall forward face down


You don't run with your head na ?

afam4eva: How can you run forward when the bus is also running forward. Your skin will be used to cover the potholes. You run against the direction of the bus.

aaaah afam - you just gave proof that you didn't grow up in lagos (at least downtown lagos).

Am not talking theory or story bro. Its based on what I did practically.

You run forward both when embarking and disembarking.


Did you do physics in Senior sec ? did you read about inertia.

Since you are jumping down from a moving object, your body is still trying to continue with the same movement. SO the only way to counter it is to run forward for some few steps before slowing to a halt.

I'v seen many folks who fell down with face flat because they didn't follow that simple technique.


You don't even need a molue, if you can get a small bus and you are not too old (bones still strong), you can get a friend to drive and try it out.



is there any other nairalander who ever jumped down from a moving bus ? let us know what the experience is like ?

ROSSIKE: [size=14pt]Molue: The 'dinosaur’ fights back[/size]




When the molue driver takes off, his main aim is to quickly reach the final destination and return to its starting point as many times as he can. This he has to do because of the very stiff competition among his fellow drivers who are also scrambbling for the same passengers. As the buses head on their journey, the front conductor bellows out names of the bus-stops and advises disembarking passengers to come close to the door as they hear names of their individual bus-stops. The molue bus does not stop at the bus-stop but merely slows down. You have to learn to disembark or you might find yourself sprawling on the road. The technique is to run backward as you step off the bus, as trying to run forward would lead to an increase in uncontrollable acceleration that would eventually make you fall down.


http://www.vanguardngr.com/2012/06/molue-the-dinosaur-fights-back/

Fantastic write up and on point except for the bolded portion of one of the paragraphs above.

I grew up in Yaba/Agege and schooled in Ikeja/Agege, needless to say, I used the molue countless times in my growing years in lagos and I can talk from first hand experience.


Run backwards while disembarking from molue !!! aaaah you'll be a dead man 'running'. The technique is actually to run forward as you disembark. This is to counter the difference in relative velocity between the two objects (you and the molue in question).
It just that since the molue will still be a bit faster than the human to the observer's eye, its as though the commuter is running backwards

Someone once said 80% of nairalanders are hooked on cocaine. . . .

now I believe !!!

Meddler: Did you even read the article?? She's already into drugs and other vices, which is why they took such a drastic measure (I don't even consider it drastic enuf). So instead of disciplining her which they have already tried doing by grounding her and seizing all her electronics. They shud rebuke and criticize (which mind they have done if you read the article) and encourage her bad behavior in public. Yea that shud totally help her change her bad behavior (sarcasm). And who knows next time she will start cooking up meth at home. Negative behavior/action attracts consequences. If she didn't want to be subjected to this kind of humiliation. She shud not have done all those things. Easy as that. Not rocket science

Am sorry ma, but I just went through the article and I still cant figure out where they said she's already into drugs. please can you kindly point it out to me.


. . . .and come to think of it, even if, do you really think that being forced to hold a sign in front of the road will cure a durg and a sex addict.

If you've ever experienced being run down in public by your own parents as a child, you'l realize its not in anyway a form of punishment. You are killing the child future already.
Its like saying since water has not been able to quench a fire, why not try adding petrol and see . . . .

Jarus: "First, the Nigerian federation is not a federation of religions, but of states. Whereas states with overwhelming Muslim majorities may legislate for themselves shari’ah laws for their Muslim populations, the non-Muslim indigenes of those states are equal in every respect to the Muslim majority. Their complete freedom of religion, including freedom from harassment for non-conformity to the tenets of Muslim law in their choice of dress or food or drink etc. must be guaranteed and protected. In this regard, the various groups set up under the name of Hisbah corps must be restrained from interfering in any manner with the lifestyle of non-Muslims, particularly where the offence they are accused of is only an offence under shari’ah law. Such incidents as attacks on bars or beer-trucks or hotels arguably represent an attempt to force non-Muslims to live by the dietary or moral laws of the shari’ah."

Sanusi Lamido Sanusi, 'Muslim Community in a multi-religious milieu', Accra, Ghana, 2003.

God bless you Jarus .
I'll want to believe you are a muslim ?
However, I'll like to add that such sentiments should also be extended to muslims (not just non muslims).
There should be no compulsion in religious because even within religious groups we have distinct parties with differing opinions
on how the faith should be practiced so it is live and let's live.
Whether am a muslim or not I should not be compelled to follow any form of religious laws. (I have met learned muslims who believe sharia should be practiced as personal rules and not enforced. so what do you say about those ?)

There are always a thing line when you say hisbah can harrass muslims and not non muslims. What if my parents are not both muslims ? do I qualify as a non muslim ? what if I decide to change religion (which I have a right as a human and citizen to do ) ?

talktimi: I'm not for or against but if you read the article properly the parents said they had tried alternative modes of punishments severally without any positive results. She evn laughed at them. How would you feel if your 15 year old daughter brought a boy into the house by 3am for a sexcapade ?

Its not about how you'll feel but the fact that the parents just took the child/parent battle to another level.
If you can't make a situation better, then don't just make it worse.

Once the child gets more independent and bolder, I bet she'll be looking for ways to pay her parents back - embarrassment for embarrassment.

and come to thin of it, if they were not 'stupid' and clueless parents in the first place, how will the daughter have the guts to sneak a child into their home at night in the first place . I mean its even different if she was trying to sleep over in the guys house.

ogugua88: Imagine people feeling sorry for this girl. Una never jam ogbanje. Some of these Yankee kids were born rotten. I have witnessed it in person. A mother tells her daughter to behave in public. The girl shouted back at her, "shut the f*#% up". The mom was so embarrassed. She actually sobbed and left the room. Kids murdering their parents because their parents seized their playstation. Girls sleeping with boys for potato chips, in hopes of getting pregnant. Koboko no fit cure ogbanje. I'm telling you.

If her parents didn't send her on the streets, she would one-up them next time. She's already sneaking boys to her room and laughing in her parents/grandparents' faces. Discipline is best when it's started from young. At age 15, shame and humiliation may be the answer.

I indeed feel sorry for the girl !!

they might just have destoyed her life (self esteem). Corporal punishment might even have been better


an age will come when she'll be independent and she'll most probably grow up hating whoever put her through such shame, without any form of self esteem and not see any good in herself.
Let's just pray she doesn't succumb to drugs or more sex (prostitution) or some other vices. You know most notorious gangs always get people with low self esteem because that's always the only place this guys feel they can be themselves without the fear of criticism or be looked down upon.


Discipline for kids should somewhat be like the relationship between a boxer and the coach. You train and rebuke and criticize in the closet. While you motivate and encourage in the ring (public)

Efemena_xy: This is just sick

There are better ways to correct teenagers than this. Sure, this isn't physical abuse...it's emotional abuse! Stripping a young child of her dignity and publicly humiliating her this way?

jidegirl12: This is point blank ABUSE!!! Naija! chei! That girl will need series of therapy sessions to get her self esteem back in orde...that's if she ever will...dem don damage her ...just like that! young girls are the most vulnurable being..

shadrach77: The way i see it, it's like killing a fly with a sledge hammer. They have ruined the girl's life

I totally ageee with this views - the parents actions were Pyrrhic

NEW REPORTS COMING IN SUGGEST THAT THE VICTIMS WERE KILLED BECAUSE THEY WERE SUSPECTED JTF INFORMERS
AND THAT THE DEATH TOLL WAS 5 AND NOT 20.

The latter version actually seem more plausible.


I remember an initial poster saying that with time different version of the event will start to emerge from different quarters quoting differing figures

About 15 yrs ago, I once asked my mum why she was always praying in Yoruba despite the fact that she's educated. She told me she prays in yoruba cos she thinks in yoruba. That we ought to always pray in the language we use for thought.

When we (the kids) told her we exclusively think in English. She was shocked !!! She thought we were joking but then its true. You naturally think in the language you are most fluent in and you use most often.

Its just like programming unless a platform is specified, your approach to solving programmatic problems will closely follow the structure of the language you are most versed in and you use most often

Ileke-IdI:
She's not pregnant. She ate her twin.

brilliant girl.

E pa atewo fun.