₦airaland Forum

Let me wake this thread

Nigeria is finished!

The wife will scatter it

The young id1ot is committing FORNICATION

while the irresponsible woman is committing ADULTERY. - 1 Corinthians 6:9,10

Stop bringing religion into discussions like this. I expect you to be pragmatic and give me a logical point of view. Stop quoting nonsense bible.








I iimagine hat was in your heart when you said telling him to stop was difficult cos of the benefits. Which benefit?

You, your friend and his cousin are a league of lazy young men wanting to reap where you did not show.

#SAPAFC

Is this one whyning me ni? Me, lazy? I go buy the woman and her abroad husband together.

Every Nigerian man who is abroad and have a wife in Nigeria should know that their wives are sleeping around. I know many of you abroad husbands are here, shey una dey hear me so? Dem dey fvk your wife.

And would you blame the women? No!

How can you be 6000 kilometers away enjoying your life and having the best sex of your life in the cold region of North America and Europe and expect your wife to remain celibate. Just know they are sleeping with her, accept it in your mind, dont ask her about it, just swallow it and move on.

As for your friend's cousin, leave the boy to enjoy his life. Let him enjoy the money the American maga is sending over and the fresh punanni he left behind. No one should come here and talk sh1t about karma or death. In fact the abroad husband will never know. She will only need to cut every communication and delete every chat and messages once he is around. Nothing go do am.

When you come of age, you will want to sit down and look back at some things you did as a youth and smile, some very crazy and fun things. That young man is gathering a fine experience he will tell his children and grandkids. Sincerely, I wish I was in his shoes.

Dissolve the unholy marriage between the sane people of Southern Nigeria and the stone age inclined cows of the North.

0 New cases

We don finally tire to dey deceive ourselves abi

Lies

This is a strong message.

Nicely shot and executed film.

Well done bro

lalasticlala, move it

Great e-book. Great method. Worth every naira

BigSarah:
You're a misogynistic little man, you're already highlighting physical defects...
Do your IT and leave

I swear!

Wow! This is a very good and educative piece. Got me teary.

This is the kind of materials the mods should put on the front page...oya lalasticlala

You did well bro. Kudos

Fake EFCC from the other thread and now fake soldiers?

Dafuq is going on in this country?

This guy is a bloody fool. In a country like ours where it is easy to bribe your way out of any case, going to court or police with no concrete evidence is a complete waste of time. It is just easy to sweep it under the carpet.

The girl has been molested since she was 7 and the best way to get justice was to go the CCTV way and play along. It won't affect her psychologically that much knowing that it was all planned.

I support the use of trap and CCTV to nail that motherfvcker.

I still cannot bring myself to watch that video by the way. I find it disturbing and it might traumatize me.

His wife is beautiful.

Now that his music career has entered bore hole, how will he feed her and the unborn kids?

Still selling...

Fluffy males and female American Eskimo puppies for sale

WhatsApp: 08163.....

DSC7:
I met this girl last week, we discussed for a while then i let my intentions known to her... She accepted and fell in love with me...

TBH i loved her too unconditionally, after 3days she paid me a visit, we talked, got to know each other better and ended up having an epic romance but no sex because i had no condom at home when she visited....

Yesterday she visited again and i heard the worst news i never expected...


As we were talking she was just staring in space, i noticed and asked her what is bothering her,, she was reluctant to open up but after persuading her she open up to me.....


She told me that she came here to hustle but along the line she discovered that she is pregnant, she called her bf and told him but he ended up telling her to take care of her self that he is not ready for any pregnancy issue... After some days she called him again but his number was switched off.. Since then she have not heard from him...


Now the problem is that she wants to terminate the pregnancy but i talked her out of it because it's a 50/50 something... She agreed to keep it but since yesterday i have been thinking of how to continue with her, I don't know whether to end the Relationship or to still keep her so her sanity would still be intact... She looks so disturbed, betrayed and depressed but she told me that anytime she is around me she feels comfortable because i was still showing her love and caring despite her condition...


My brothers and gentle men i need your input because i am confused....

Oloriburuku ni e o

I bin get crush on this babe before o

Nothing fascinating or special about this.

Absolutely nothing!

NwaNimo1:
After everything the wife will leave them for a .......General!

[img]https://media1./images/6cc4005e9c31e608c7d9d39f9499716f/tenor.gif?itemid=21122223[/img]

The image of N'golo Kante lightens me up anytime. Thanks for sharing

Vinnie2000:
This Boy, hmm..

Ur statement just makes me Laff..
Depending on d age of ur GF..Perhaps ur GF is 28 or 30+.
@dis age, Girls re nw pressured n desire marriage...

Because All 18-23 Girls love Handsome Boys like Mad!!
Aside d natural Attraction to Dem, they like to show Dis Fine Boys off to thier friends/sisters/haters,, showcasing how they have a Cute n Hot BF..

Go to Nigerian universities/Polytechnics,, Handsome boys with small cash Fvck Girls like no man's business..

N dey spend Nthin..

It's Ugly ones or Boyfriend@home dat dey will ask for Money..

So don't say dat..

Every Guy Shud look for a gud Babe who's attracted to him n enjoy his relationship..

No need to argue with you. You sound like a kid that you are.

Who the fuq is comedian MC Edo whatever you call him. This upcoming comedian wey build this kind house when there has not been comedy shows since the start if Corona, no visible endorsement.

We know as e dey go

We know where una dey see the money

Xj2020:
A friend told me that a gurl they have done things together suddenly having feelings for his younger brother just by seeing his pics that he shared on WhatsApp.
She started by asking if the younger brother is actually the elder brother. When that was soughted out she then remarked by stating that he is handsome more than twice and then moved on to ask if he is married. This is a girl that has never complimented this guy in any way.
This girl is supposed to be the girl friend of this my friend.
What could be going on here.

You and your friend are big fools. She doesnt have any feelings for the brother like you might be thinking in your dirty skull. Its just a fvcking compliment. There is nothing wrong if she finds the brother attractive; it does not suggest that she will tear his clothes and start fvcking him.

I have a younger brother five times more handsome than I am, and if I was given 5 Naira each time a babe I am fvcking said he was more good looking, I would be rich enough to buy the moon. They would even joke and say "If I had seen him first, I wouldn't date you." I would just laugh, drag them into my room and start fvcking again. I even leave them with my brother in the house and come back late knowing that no sh1t is going to happen.

You must be in your early/mid twenties morrron...

You and your friend (Abi na only you seff) plus all the fools on this thread calling for the girl's head don't have any brain left in your skull.

Fvck you all!

Wow!

Ishilove:
The staff were looking forward to enjoying a sumptuous meal of swallow on a hot weekday afternoon. It also meant we would save our lunch money as things, as we all know, have become very expensive.

Blaise brought the warmers to the admin office and everyone swooped on the food. The first thing I noticed was the semo was very soft and a bit sugary. The egusi also tasted...funny...

Wetin concern us? We forged on and finished the meal with finger licking relish. Our neighbour who sold provisions in the next office asked for a share and was able to arm twist the receptionist into bringing her a large portion.

About two hours later, I felt pressed and wanted to urinate but I found the toilet occupied. I waited 20 minutes and went back, only to meet the toilet occupied again by another member of the staff. I was forced to cross to another section of the complex to use the public toilet.

As the day progressed and I noticed that the usually ebullient staff members were becoming increasingly subdued. Around 5pm (the office closes by 6pm) my stomach began to rumble, and to my chagrin, a watery fart escaped my genteel anus. I thought about visiting the toilet briefly and found it still occupied so I decided to hold my bowels until I got home. "At least I will be able to sit comfortably and do monitoring spirit on my Facebook and Whatsapp contacts," I mused.

By the time I left the office on my way back home, my stomach was very calm, but I was halfway into the journey when I had the first discomfiting signs of trouble.

**********

"Be calm, be calm", I urged my stomach, but it growled in response and my anus trembled in anticipation.

I was hemmed in between two men inside keke marwa, somewhere along Oniwaya road when i started feeling really shitty. Literally. I initially ignored it, but the urge to rip off my granny pants and let it really rip was getting stronger and stronger.

We were still crawling along on that perennially busy road when I knew there and then I would not make it without a bike. I MUST GET A BIKE, I thought wildly.

When I got down at Dopemu, I frantically searched for a bike but could not find any. It seems Taskforce had been abroad earlier in the day so all the bikes were keeping away for the time being.

It dawned on me then that I was headed for a very embarrassing 'accident'. I could feel the watery and hot waste products teasing the entrance of my anus as my stomach could no longer obey commands from my brain. I decided to walk gingerly to the Akowonjo bridge where I was certain to get a bike. By 'gingerly', I mean catwalk. Hold your breath, squeeze your ass tight and roll your hips. And walk.

I was gently catwalking to the bridge and praying to God when a congress of swaggering youngmen passed me. One of them, muscular and with a 16 pack abdomen turned and whistled. "Sweet mama, I like your style o", he leered.

Frustrated by my inability to get a bike, the shit threatening to embarrass my enemy not me, the lack of fast food restaurants in the vicinity (I would have dashed there to use their toilets) and by the general state of the nation, I turned in anger and snarled with more aggression than necessary "shut up your dirty mouth, you this small boy. You don't know your mate!"

Taken aback, the muscular dude slinked away in mortification.

Unfortunately for me, the energy I used in transferring my aggression to the boy loosened my bowels and I felt the first droplets of shit blooming over the back my pink granny pants.

"Oh nooooooooo, oh nooooooooooo!!!," I wailed. Abandoning all pretence at decorum, I dashed to the bank closest to me.

"Please sir, I need to use your toilet," I begged the security man.

"Madam the bank is closed," was the nonchalant reply.

"Please sir, this thing will disgrace me. Please I am begging you," I shamelessly pleaded, all the while feeling the hot shit flowing faster and faster. IT MUST NOT FLOW DOWN MY LEGS, i thought frantically.

"Please I am using God to beg you!" I wailed, and jacked up the man by his shirt, knocking his cap askew.

That was when the man knew I meant business. He extricated himself from my vice-like grip and gave me the toilet key.

I ran pell mell to the toilet, dropped my bag on the WC and let rip. The sound of my exploding ejections must have been heard at Alausa. By the time my spirit was calm and my eyes open to survey the extent of the damage, the toilet, bathroom mirror inclusive had been liberally anointed....

I kuku off the pant, rinsed it in the wash hand basin and spent 20 minutes scrubbing the toilet stall (I have home training ). After cleaning, i packaged the now battered pant inside a black nylon and dropped inside the waste bin. Yep, I had to go commando the rest of the way home.

Suffice it to say, Blaise was sacked the next day. I heard the MD was screaming for his head from his scented, air conditioned toilet. Our greedy neighbour who does not see food and look away, branched two fast food restaurants before she got to her home in Illupeju. The rest of the staff all had their own tales of woe, but mine was just too humiliating to talk about.

We have gone back to Akwa Ibom.

******
Disclaimer:

This narration is 100% factual but did not happen to Ishilove.

Even though I knew from the start that this was pure fiction, I enjoyed every bit of it. Your writing skill is top-notch.

By the way, do you live in Akowonjo? I grew up there.

People on Instagram will concoct any pitiable story just to trend.

The one who started the thread and all the commenters under her are bloody liars.

Believe this at your peril.

gabazin080:
firstly I am a carpenter and furniture maker. a friend on the the next street called me to come fix his door net. on getting there I stripped the clothes I wore from home to my working cover-all. I put my clothes with my pulse inside on the chair in their sitting room.

few minutes later I wanted a cold Pepsi, on getting to where I dropped my clothes, I realized #500 was missing from my pulse but I thought maybe I left it at home. I went outside to get the soft drink and I met my friend's 11 year old daughter drinking yogurt with snacks.

I asked where she got the money from and she said her dad gave her the money. I asked his dad if he gave her money to get something and he said no. that's when I told him #500 was missing from my clothes I dropped in their sitting room and I went outside now and saw her daughter drinking yogurt with snacks.

he then begged me to forgive the girl and returned my money, he told me about how the girl has been disgracing him in the compound by entering people's room to steal. she steals from the parents too and in school and will later say its one spirit that used to tell her where people keep their money and to go and steal it.

he claimed the problem is spiritual and has gone to some pastors and alfas but no changes.
the thought of the little girl's problem never left my mind till I finish my work there that day that's why I brought it here, ask u guys if such thing could be spiritual and what can be done because he is tired of beating her everyday with no changes

Nothing spiritual about it. She needs a therapist. This is a psychological issue. Read the attached screenshot below

And so what?

Is this news worthy?

kenzysmith:
My guy done hear prohept prophecy begin beg

You talking thrash bruv

Some nitwits who believe in juju and all sort of rubbish will come here and say thrash.

Dude is just reacting to drugs. He go soon dey alright.