₦airaland Forum

¤sighs¤
This issue is a very serious one which really breaks my heart. i never had the slightest of tought that this could befall the islamic section of a nigerian site, but alas! Here we are.
This will continue, it has been predicted, we really have no choice. The prophet(saw) said his ummah will divide into 73 sects and only one will be admitted to jannah...further explanation from scholars suggests that the remainder will enter into paradise but will be punished for their attrocities commited.
Honestly it baffles me why we do have these divergent views when we do have only one Qur'an and we say we do believe in the last prophet(saw).
Well, Allahuma najina ma' najina.

His celebration of his goal @ the 1994 worldcup was what came popping in my head when i heard of his death...may Allah have mercy on his soul amin.

tbaba12345: I think the moderation of this thread has improved tremendously... I used to get mini heart-attacks looking at the muslim thread... The way people insult Allah and His prophet on a Muslim forum was just horrific...

There is a remarkable improvement...... JazakAllahu Khairan....

Lol @ mini heart attack, no be small things lol.
Indeed mr mac has tried and his input has really been encouraging. May Allah continue to guide you amin,
@topic, when will the campaigne start? 2015 is near o lol

deols: lai lai. If a man sins, it is his to bear. Are you saying that when men leave their households to commit zina, the sin is on the wife? I have heard such fallacies as this in the past and I'll need you t prove it to me. Every blame is supposed to be on the woman? Even if a woman is denying her husband sex, it is a test on him. he can marry another woman, he can divorce her but going out to carry out zina with the thought of the sins being on her is so so false. Abeg, desist from such tales.

Agreed, no carrier of loads will help carry another persons load...Allah says "o you who believe! Ward off from yourselves and your families a fire whose fuel is man and stone..."(Q66vs6), the prophet(saw) also said "all of you are shepards, and each one of you shall be questioned...a wife about her household..."
i am not saying the sin is on the woman, the man his responsible for his action, rather she will be sinning if her actions and inactions results in disobedience to her husband and also pushing her husband to commit a sin.

deols: I have been trying to make known the difference between duty and what a husband asks his wife to do. She is to carry out her duty without being told. But with regards obeying him, she can ask for explanations. she can challenge him. She is not a robot. so, if a husband asks his wife to do something and she has the capacity to do it, she goes ahead to do it but if she cannot, it is subject to reasoning and I want to believe that the man has feelings too.

what the husband asks his wife to do becomes a duty on her hence the law of obedience except for the exceptions... Even the duties specified outrightly is subject to reasoning too

deols: lemme give you two examples as regards that.

1. A woman is to seek permission before leaving her home. A scenario comes up where her child becomes sick. he runs into coma or convulses. Are you saying she must wait for the man before she takes her child to the hospital?

2. a woman cannot pound yam or she is sick and her husband wants to eat pounded yam. She makes it known to him but he isnt in a good mood and insists. if she died pounding that yam, Allah would punish her because no one is to harm themselves.

In Islam, if you find yourself in scenarios that only give options between two sins, you choose the lesser one. taking her son to the hospital is much more a better act than keeping to the rule that asks her to seek his permission.

WaAllahu a'lam.

Yes very true deols, the first case is a necessity she has no choice.
The second is a case of human life and dignity in which islam came to protect.
No loving muslim man in his right senses will take on his wife on the two cases, nor will she be punished by Allah(swt) for negleting her duties.
Wallahu a'lam.

davidylan: This is nonsense really. You cant compare a marriage relationship with a working relationship. I have a legal obligation to work certain hours for certain compensation so i definitely have to inform my boss if and when i am unable to fulfill that contractual obligation for circumstances beyond my control. Your wife on the other hand is supposed to be your best friend, best mate, confidante... why does she need to take permission from you to go do her hair, rush to the market or pick up her kids from work? Is she not an adult who is very capable of making decisions on her own? Do you also feel a requirement to take permission from her to go out too? Or is that a requirement solely for her while you do as you please?

Bia bi ko nu david, so marriage doesnt have lagal obligations ehn? It has no legal obligations under religion and even under the state? Why do you say all the "for better for worse, in health and sickness blah blah" @ the alter? Didnt you sign these agreements to the union? No contractual agreement abi? Abeg go and play with your cuvette jare. Even friends seek each other's permission(i did ask my friend's permission to leave his brother's nikkah).
I believe your children need no permission of yours too abi?
even though the relationship between the husband and wife cannot be likkened to that of an employer and an employee, seeking permission in Islam is a sign of mutual respect and curtesy between couples. These are the laws of Islam.

davidylan: Do angels curse the man for refusing sex too?

Sex in marriage is a religious obligation, they both are rewarded for fulfilling this. if a man denies his wife that right, he is infact sinning. Remember, we are talking about the roles of a wife!

davidylan: Why? is she 2 yrs old? Why should a wife need to seek her husband's permission to run to the market or go to work?

Lol Dr david, why will you need to take permission from your boss you'll be leaving early from work cos you are going for a PTA meeting @ your daughter's sch? Even if you own your lab, you still need to inform your secretary you are leaving the office...
The husband is the head of the household, she needs to seek his consent for the husband might need her for something or for other myriads of reasons. That aside, courtesy also demands that she informs him of her whereabouts and vice versa

davidylan: huh? so if she's upset because her husband cheated on her, the angels still curse her for refusing to sleep with him?

Didnt you read what is between the brackets? Islam teaches us everything, even intimate relations between couples and it includes romance and pre-intimacy. If the man is a good muslim, he wouldnt cheat on his wife talkless of upsetting her cos of that.

deols: Expected of her by who? her husband, family,friends, society? Standards are relative, u know. Yours might be different from other people's

Responsibilities expected of her as a good homemaker,wife,partner, mother, helper, companion etc.
By any standard i mean; religious, cultural,societal, family etc. standards

deols: obedience and duty.

I want to believe that you know that a woman is allowed to disobey her husband. if he is asking her to do something that goes against her religious obligations, disobeying him becomes mandatory. here lies the big gap between obedience to the husband and her duties in her marriage(according to Islam) which are also obligatory acts.

I agree in totality!
You are also aware that a wife must seek her husband's consent before she can leave the house or fast except for ramadhan. She should also submit herself to her husband for intimate relation when asked and that the angels curse her if she refuses(without genuine reasons) and that the prophet(saw) said if it were permited for one to posterate for another man then it would have been a wife to her husband...

deols: Many Nigerian Muslims hide under this obedience to use their 'macho' skills over their wives. If the prophet asked Fatima to carry out house chores(an hadith) and another hadith shows that he also carried out house chores, shouldnnt a combination of both already show that that duty is a shared one by spouses? Muslim men can decide to live the way of the prophet or not rather than using those words that suit them while neglecting others.

So a man would then because she has to obey him start asking her to do things even if she isnt capable of doing them? He may as well sit back while ordering her to provide for the family.

In the words of tbaba1234, If your aim is to follow the prophet, then follow him:: and I add, in totality.

It is cruel that a man would go to the market with his wife and after buying all, he carries the load and dumps them on her head. she is after all to obey.

It is the same Nija man o that buys the first car, and because it is his money drives all over town whereas his weaker sex wife(slave)goes around town with a baby bump and a child on her back with her leggedes benz or waka wagen smh

Finally, a man loses his respect when he starts to treat his wife badly. I hope she's aware of the right to LEAVE.

Yes not only nigerian muslim men do this, it is wrong and evil for a man to be cruel to his wife. Tbaba1234 made a good point on that and i totally agree.
Doing the house chores and the likes was never a problem for the women of old, they did it gracefully and taught their daughters to do so too. A good muslim man always strive to emulate the prophet(saw), may Allah(swt) assist us all amin.

deols: Now, concerning our culture.

Have it in mind please that I like to talk in terms of what is ideal. I pride myself as being a muslim first but Of course, I am Yoruba.

Islam didnt abolish the good things in our culture and you think that the woman doing the house chores is a good thing and should be left that way?? I am not at all disputing that. maybe, I would on another thread. But on this one, I havent said anything like that or havent meant to do so.

Well, doing something in which you will be rewarded not only by the husband, but Allah(swt) sounds good to me. Since you are not disputing no qualms

deols: I am only saying that, a woman cooking for her husband is not something Islam makes her duty. Duty means something she must do. And if she doesnt do them, no one should see her as bad or see her not doing them as a sin.

if not doing leads to causing major problem for the couples, disobedience to the husband, leads to the man going to another womans house to eat, thus leading to other immoralities etc. Then, it becomes a sin on her.

deols: ALso, not only Yorubas are on this forum and they wouldnt be the only ones who might find the things we discuss here useful. So, when I speak, it is on a larger scale than what 'our' culture is or is not.

Knowing this might not change much in the lives of many of the people reading this. But in case they get exposed to other Muslims, of probably other cultures, they wouldnt start to assume those people are out of this world or unIslamic because they do things differently. I was having a discussion with a friend of mine who lived a large part of her life in Europe about family, child bearing, etc and she mentioned how she plans to rotate house chores with her hubby. I laughed asking her if she had a Nigerian in mind. She joined in the laughter and told me of course. I had no doubt she could marry such a man but I knew certain busy bodies(friends or families of the man) might be the problem in such a case, that is when they'll realise she had 'used' his head.

Education, and especially an Islamic one is supposed to set everyone free, to realise the good things of life and never to be tied down by some cultural beliefs that only exist because we make them exist.

Be it as it may, the role of women/wife is quite universal even in america, only of recent with the rise in feminism, and the likes is what i believe is changing the mentality of women. Even though Islam allows for the wife to work, the responsibility of providing for the household remains that of the husband.
I know there are differnt cultures around, that is why Islam is unique with its rules and regulations which is not aimed at anhilating any culture. Take the example of a scotish man who wears "skirt" or an indian who ties a wrapper(igbos and south-south peeps too) as their traditional wear for men, how does Islam addresses this in terms of male immitating females? I believe Islam eradicates excesses and outright disobedience to Allah(swt). We screen our culture and tradition with Islam. We remove the evil and continue with the good.
Islamic knowledge really do set one free from false believe and wrong assumptions, it makes a wife know that she is the custodian of her husband's household and will be asked on the day of judgement how she executed her responsibilities.

deols: I really do want you to get what I am driving at.

FIrst, u referred to what I said concerning Fatima. the fact that the prophet encouraged her to carry out those duties doesn't make them compulsory on her. It is like the acts that earn you rewards without being compulsory. let me give you examples. There is a hadith concerning a man who walked into the masjid during salaatul Jum'ah, the prophet called on him, asking him to get up and say his nawafil(tahiyatul masjid). That ddnt make observing it compulsory, it was enjoined. so also, if u say subhanallah, alhamdulillah and Allahu akbar after every salaat, u'll get rewards but they arent compulsory aspects of Islam. Even Allah(SWT) talks of the servants of the most merciful as those who wake up in the night, standing and prostrating(i.e observing the tahajjud and this doesnt make tahajjud compulsory. I can go on and on. Breastfeeding your child for two years is mentioned in the Qur'an but you dont even haave to breastfeed your own child according to Islam. If a woman wouldnt be able to, it becomes the duty of her husband to even pay the foster mother that does the breast feeding.

In essence, that the prophet encouraged his daughter to do this, like other good things doesnt make it compulsory on anyone.

Yes i get your drift deols, but still would not agree completely if not totally.
The prophet (saw) encouraged his own daughter to take care of her household cos its her duty and Allah will reward her abundantly, if it wasnt, what stops the prophet(saw) from granting her wish?
Marriage is about responsibilities and privileges, Islam need not state specifically that a wife must cook for her household(i prefer this than only the husband), cos even at war, women are the ones cooking, tending to the injured and giving water to the mujahids.
The roles of a wife in her husbands house according to Islam encompasses her being a good homemaker/manager and this is compulsory on her to do with the aim of pleasing Allah(swt).

usisky: ^^^^After many many years of assessing the human behaviour, i have come to realize why most people simply lack the capacity to comprehend. It's not that people aren't smart, but it is the-EGO-that blocks our understanding. Most people hold on to certain prejudices:cultura/religious conditioning and are unwilling to let go of such even if it violates commonsense.

Same goes for you bro, you so full of your own stuff, you hardly reason with others...

usisky: As regards the topic, i had clearly given verses where God describes His omnipresence, yet, people still argue. What kind of reasoning is this? God's word?!

Omnipresent? How please? Quran 2 vs 115 did you read this verse in arabic? if you did, how will you translate it literally?

deols: @sino
I understand clearly what you mean. Cooking for ur husband as a woman isnt a bad thing. There's also the hadith where Fatima demanded a maid and the prophet encouraged her to go ahead working in her home.

I just like to make things clear. What Islam says versus what our cultures permit. Islam is a way of life and a couple accepting to live an Islamic life should know exactly where the lines are drawn..I wish i can express myself better

Sis deols, you have even brought forth a proof that indicates the wife should take care of the household, maybe i dont really get you still. What islam says does not negate our culture, rather it encourages our culture in which a wife should be obedient to her husband. I agree with the fact that men should be loving, caring and considerate (she is not his slave); a woman should be dutiful and obedient to her husband.
A wife who does not do the things expected of her is a bad wife under any standards.

This is really funny. Negro_ntns please dont get it twisted, Allah and Allahu are the same. If i properly want to understand you, then i'll say that your argument about 'H' should have been the arabic letter 'ha' which is also used as a pronoun alone or with an attached 'wa' pronounced 'Huwa' which means 'he/him/his'(depending the context). I once learnt about the suffis claim about the use of this letter/word, but there is no substantiated proof from the Qur'an and sunnah, its classified as one of the "ilm batiny"(hidden knowledge). Has Tbaba said, proofs are important, without authentic proof; my brother no way dia.

This is really good. Jazkumullah khayran bro.

The man in question has commited a treasonable offence shikena, its a law for crying out loud! If you want to spread your atheism, go else where.
"five years for insulting any major religion and six years if you spread such blasphemy" i think we need this here in nigeria.

The roles of a wife in Islam is very clear as it has been highlighted by deols, but i'll like to say Islam is a religion with rules and regulation that did not come to abolish any culture or tradition, rather, Islam came to abolish evil practices within any culture and tradition. When islam came to mecca according to the sirah, it upheld practices among the arabs that did not negate islam, but further encouraged them.
Our culture and tradition is that a wife should cook for her family and i believe this is part of taking care of her household.
A wife must understand that primarily, her actions are to please Allah(swt). Her roles in her husband's house is to please her creator. A story of a female sahabah that did her necessary responsibilities to her husband even though her child died comes to mind(i cant lay my hands on the hadith now), she did'nt do that to please her husband but Allah and she was adequately rewarded.
@uplawal, you fall my hand o, you just cast a serious allegation against the totality of my people even those with iman. Our people dey try o, at least we allow our women to work and own thier own houses...lol

Kolo: when the ball passes between your legs, also a kind of game whereby you are randomly slapped if the ball passes between your legs. If you no get mind no try am o lol
(shouting)I dey, idey: signalling you are free for a pass

Islam is a way of life which makes it blend with diverse cultures and traditions if and only if these cultures and traditions do not entail what islam prohibits.
I believe islamic arts constitute the large amount of differnt cultures, expressing islam in their own unique way.
I want to believe the op is talking about the islamic calligraphy, which is always in arabic cos arabic is the language of the Qur'an.

17years in prison! For a thought crime! Were is the so called freedom of speech or freedom of whatever the american govt tries to sell all around the world? Well i am not surprised, they sure know their enemies and would go any lenght to anhilate them.
And if he had agreed to be an informant, he would surely be a hero in their eyes, given all the goodies of life.
With such thought provoking and very sincere emotional statement to the judge, 17yrs is the result, so if he said nothing what would it have been? life? Oh, its only in the hollywood movies such statements work wonders.
And verily, our word went forth of old unto our slaves sent(to warn), that they verily would be helped, "And that our host, they verily would be the victors" ma shallah.

This is really sad and it aches my heart, a thought crime?! May Allah continue to be with him and make is feet firm on the path of islam as well as each and everyone of us amin.
The poem is very nice.
True power belongs to Allah, no need to fear anyone!

As a muslim in nigeria, you can live and enjoy your practice of the religion very well. There are few obstacles though, but a ready solution if you want to take things to a very strict level.
My principle is basically Allah's statement, fear Allah as much as you can(Q64:16), the hadith of the prophet(saw) whiich states: verily, the religion is easy, and no one should try make it difficult unless it overburdens the person... Then i work mostly on my circle of influence, looking inward and try to be a better muslim everyday.

May Allah forgive him his sins, save him from the punishment of the grave and have mercy on him on the day of accountability amin.

deols: yes, I agree it is an art worth celebrating. I enjoy listening to them. There's a guy I listened to at an event in Ilorin sometime ago. The good thing about his recitation is his good tajweed. MashaAllah, a combination of the local one in a very modern style got me tripping(hmmn, astaghfirullah!!!!)

lol

deols: thanks for those words

You are welcome

deols: I dont think they have a good excuse for not allowing people sleep in the mosque. the mosque in Islam has more functions than to just be a place of worship.

I do agree with you, but you know we nigerians na, now generally speaking, most nigerians take public places for granted, if left unchecked, people will misuse it and its going to be a sorry sight, a national mosque for that matter!

deols: and btw, why do u lagos people think u can always have ur way?? Guess the man did it a mallam's way..lol

Lol, cos lagos peeps are super cool

olawalebab: Ajanosi add the flavour to waasi.

On point bro

olawalebab: Buhari said he has his target audience that's why he's preaching that way. (though i don't support his style)

Even with that he goes overboard. I listen to him for pure entertaiment and nothing more.

deols: lets start from home as suggested by tpia


right now, I wish I have architectural jargons to describe this mosque. I love it and if You've been there, You can just help me out.

The national mosque is an architectural masterpiece, a magnificient edifice and a superstructural beauty. First time i was in it was mesmerizing, the beauty was astonishing. The mosque big no be small. One thing i noticed was that you are not allowed to sleep in it, i guess for the mosque not to be messed up, cos i observed the fajr prayer then tried to relax and view the mosque from another angle, when a mallam told me not to, i tried to play lagos boy looked for another location, a very far away place only to be disturbed again by the same mallam yelling in hausa lol.

deols: I also enjoy the ajanosis o. but they waste time truly. ANd I really am not a fan of buhari omo Musa and his likes especially now that they've gone commercial. My favorite of the old peeps is baba Ayede. People who live in Ibadan should know him. He speaks more of the stories of the prophets in ramadan.

Buhari omo musa is a comedian and business man, but his ajanosis are good sha.
never heard of baba Ayede, maybe cos i live in lagos. You do agree that they make events lively and it is an art worth celebrating?

^ jazaks bro, now i get it.

maclatunji: When you say dismantling the Shariah, what exactly do you mean? This topic seems complex and I think it is better left at the level of theological debate in Nigeria because we do not operate in an Islamic state. Its application by individual Muslims would probably mean that all Muslims would tag the other 'a disbeliever' after any major disagreement. Why would that leave our community?

On second thought, I realise that certain parts of this concept may actually affect us as individuals and not as a collective.

According to my understanding, dismantling the sharia entails the destortion of some basic sharia principles and the incomplete establishment of the sharia in an islamic state, the case of saudi arabia practicing monarchy for example. The issue is quite complex, for there are scholars who make takfir on leaders and schorlars who dismantle the sharia rather than placing them under the kufr duna kufr and they do have thier proofs from the Quran.

tbaba1234: ^Abdur-Rahman ibn Sakhr Al-Azdi

Tbaba, i thought his name was abd rahman ibn sakhr ad-dawsi? Or am i mixing things up hia?

@usisky, ori bibe ko ni ogun ori fifo, an outright rejection of hadith and sunnah can never be a solution to the way in which islam is being viewed. I would like to ask, some christians do use verses from the Quran to claim that islam is evil, do you reject those verses? And if they do quote the verse like Q 9:29, how do you explain yourself?