₦airaland Forum

PrincessGlow:
Opposites attract. You probably "envy" each other at some level - you, her faith; she, your "freedom"

Na no "envy" whatsoever. We just allow each other to express themselves spiritually, the way it makes you happy.

My mum is Catholic and she gets along very well with my wife. Some Sundays my mum takes the children to Catholic mass. Some Sundays my wife takes them to winners chapel. Me I go to work on Sundays after dropping them off in church.

bull67:
G.Os and pastors, Imams are the problem in nigeria. In the 50s,60,70, most nigerians marry from other religion and later if they like they cross over, some do not. The country was moving in a good direction. Then their where not so many places of worship because everybody had a job. There where many proffesionals, tectnicians e.t.c. the unemployment wasvery low. But now in the era of religion where people dont want to work but expecting manna from heaven it has turned so manny nigerians to be useless. And the useless ones take religion has a proffession to decieve people.

If you do a research you will discover that there is a correlation between the degrading moral fabric of the Nigerian society and rise of religiosity in Nigeria. In the 60s and 70s before the rise of Pentecostalism, we had good moral values. There was love between neighbours no matter the tribe or religion. Pentecostalism breeds greed, hatred and hypocrisy.

PrincessGlow:
Not only that, all these GO's credibly accused of rapes and all sorts of wayo miracles.
mugnmuffin focus on the person, not the church the person belongs to, or what the person says

Me I be atheist, my wife na Pentecostal. And we have been happily married for over 10 years with no problem.

Marriage and relationships in general should be based on love, respect and compromise. You don't need to force everyone to follow your beliefs and views to feel happy about yourself.

alexvic12:
I perfectly understand you. Please, take time to pray and seek God's face.

WE MARRY FOR KINGDOM ADVANCEMENT AND NOT FOR ONLY LOVE!

If he doesn't think being a Christian goes deeper than the 'normal Christian life' that most people lead, please pause or even call off the wedding.

Forget about age or pressure; focus on God.

He will send his choice to you. Remember, WE MARRY FOR KINGDOM ADVANCEMENT AND NOT FOR ONLY LOVE!!

And you did not have this advice for pastor Chris Oyakhilome, pastor Chris Okotie or numerous pastors or G.Os who divorced their wives few years after marriage.

Then what will you say about uncountable number of Muslim to Christian marriages.

Religion in Africa has became a vehicle for hatred instead of love.

JESHAL:
Dullard solve your single motherhood crisis,that the root, fatherlessness is an epidemic stop subsidizing single mothers with welfare packages

If they stop subsidizing single mothers what happens to their children?
Of course you don't care, you only care for children while in the womb, once they leave the womb you don't care for their lives anymore. You see them as reward of The problem sins of their mothers and so must suffer with with their mothers.

Strongbest:
Lols. How are we sure of that? Very unintelligent youth.

Just point out what you think is wrong in his write up if you think you are intelligent if not, stop quoting me because I hate wasting my time on slowpokes.

He is wrong on so many levels. Government might as well regulate free speech, social gatherings and even free thought. Government should not be in the business of regulating what people do with their time. Someone that spends 70% of his time on social media should face the consequences alone.
Social media just like any other invention can be used for positive or negative. Many youths that have used social media for positives have made and continue to make millions of naira from it. Do you know how many youths make their living from social media.

What we should be talking about is to enact laws or extending existing libel and sedition laws to cover social media, so that anyone that is hurt by fake news or lies can easily seek redress in court.

Rossiminku:
It is cursed with thoughtless people like you who don't understand how international commerce operates.

FYI, in today's world, nobody develops solely or even mostly through the export of raw materials. Not even diamonds.

Unless you are a tiny gulf state with huge oil reserves like Kuwait or UAE, you pretty much need to be into heavy manufacturing, to build a developed society today.

The income from raw materials export is NOT ENOUGH to develop.

The bottlenecks on African manufacturing, ie processing those raw materials into finished goods for export at higher prices than the raw materials, are the monstrous tariffs imposed by western, Asian and other nations on imports of African manufactured products.

This makes the African manufactured goods uncompetitive, discouraging manufacturing on the continent.

The USA has in recent years, implemented AGOA, to ease this discrimination against African manufactures, but they are only 20% of the world economy. The entire world needs to lift restrictions on the imports of African manufactured goods, to create a level playing field.

THAT is when Africa can finally take its rightful place in the comity of nations.

In the meantime, Africa will continue to improve on INTRA-African trade, and increasing the buying power of its citizenry, so as to eventually become self-sufficient in the production and sale of its manufactured products within the continent.

That's the most logical way to go. Africa has a large enough market, we don't really need to export to the rest of the world. With our over 1 billion population we can even meet half of the African market.

The problem of Africa in terms of production of manufactured goods are poor infrastructure, poor public health facilities, poor and useless educational policy, poor communication due to language barrier and most important of all undue influence by former colonial powers who profit from creating instability.

commodore007:
Africa her people walk on diamond yet they can hardly feed their stomachs, Africa The warehouse and store of the world raw materials for production of The commodities that sustain the world population, yet she has missed out on two major Industrial Revolution,
Africa is not in short supply of human resources.
We need leaders who are willing to lose their lives until then, her people would keep on walking on Gold with empty soles

African leaders who are ready to lose their lives to better their people and reject foreign exploitation will just do that. He would be killed in a coup sponsored by foreign powers or he will be disposed. Ask Kwame Nkrumah, ask Gaddafi, ask Sankara, ask Lulumba. Mandela was able to survive and celebrated because he did not disrupt the system.

IMAliyu:
I can't say for the rest of Africa.

But Nigeria had a chance with the 70s oil boom.
To use the inflow of capital to expand its manufacturing and other industry, but this is where the human factor came in.
Our leaders lacked vision, and the embezzling killed that opportunity.

And there is the conspiratorial possiblity, that Africa is intentionally being kept poor and prevented from manufacturing, because if it were to start manufacturing, that would mean that the cost goods for the developed world will substantially go up.

But a lot of previously poor Asian countries were able to get themselves out of a similar situation. As an aunt of mine would say "Did those people have two heads?"

Nigeria stood no chance to expand its manufacturing and industrial base in the 70s despite the oil boom. Why? Because the leaders we had that were incidentally British trained were not equipped with the knowledge and skills of building a self sustaining industrialized country. Take a look at the leadership then Gowon, Garba, Buhari, etc. These guys were all in their early 30s, some in their late 20s. Most had no experience or training whatsoever in administration or governance. With the oil boom, they could not build universities, power stations, railways, roads and bridges or even airports. Yet Gowon could declare then that our problems was not money but how to spend it.

You cannot compare us to Asian countries. Asian countries already had structured and advanced societies. Most Asian countries were not completely colonized and exploited the way it was done in Africa, because Europe did not need raw materials from Asia. Asians were not made to hate each other with the same divide and rule tactics the Europeans employed in Africa.

Ikwerelastborn:
Well the people said otherwise and as the saying goes ,the voice of the people is the voice of God.
Allow easterners to go, is very simple

And you are the voice of the people? Those that was voted to speak for the people have spoken, if you want to speak for igbo people, ask the people to allow you to represent them. If they elect you to speak for them, then you will be taken seriously. For now you are simply an aggrieved youth or individual speaking for himself.

IMAliyu:
Africa only supplies the world with raw materials. We don't produce, at least not at the scale of those countries mentioned.

The problem is a finished/end product will always be more valuable than, raw material.
It's the difference between the profit margins and labour of a farmer, and that of a fastfood joint.

And the only reason these mineral resources in Africa are valuable, is because of the demand from these manufacturing countries. Otherwise we don't seem to be seeking value in them.

Even the simple brown silica sand in our houses can be turned into something of value in the right hands.

Brown silica in your house will not turn to something of value by itself, it would need first and formost knowledge on how to turn it into something of value and then machinery and capital.
First our knowledge base is faulty as African to to school to learn to speak English and acquire administrative knowledge to serve the western demands and needs. Then we have not even started the road to industrialisation by building relevant infrastructures. Finally, the capital for developing the relevant manpower and building infrastructure is just not available. So we are confined to selling raw materials without adding any value.

NwaIgboBoy:
And the answer is yes! I think Africa is cursed especially Nigeria

If you say Africa is cursed, it also means you too is cursed because you are an African.

The countries you look up to today were cursed with disease, ignorance, superstition and bad leadership for thousands of years. The people finally came together and fought for a better life instead of throwing their hands up and scream "we are cursed".

omotola90:
lol....so are there no virgin sisters in their late 20s? Is there any theory that stipulates that ladies that kept their virginity till then have some form of hormonal problem or have hormonal imbalance? Why shielding away from the truth.... Pre-marital sex is bad and shouldn't be encouraged? If anyone is a victim, tell God to forgive you.... That's the sole reason of many failed relationship we have today.... Peace

I am not saying there are no virgin girls in their late 20s or even 30s. What I am saying is that it is an abnormality. I honestly don't pray for my daughter to be a virgin into her late 20s.

Yes premarital sex is bad, but as I said, in present world situation where ladies are not ready for marriage well into their 20s and with the degree of freedom they have, premarital sex is an a reality.

There is this friend of my wife's friend that got married while a virgin in their thirties. Her virgina had closed and the husband could not penetrate until she underwent an operation.

omotola90:
universal fact or your theory...

Universal fact.

omotola90:
well, that's your ideology if you ask me... There are still virgins in there late Twenties anyways

It's not my ideology, this is a universal fact. You guys are fond of hiding your head in the sand, and then start living double or hypocritical lives to project a false holy appearance.

I don't engage in deceit and hypocrisy as most of you do. If a lady remains virgin into her late 20s, then there is some fundamental problems wrong with her psychologically or physically. It might be an hormonal imbalance.

Once a normal girl hits puberty and her late teens, her estrogen and progesterone along with oxytocin and vasopressin will start acting up. This is the most difficult periods for parents and they need to be prepared to be extra vigilant and tolerant. Most teens are very rebellious at this time and are usually "enemies" with their mothers. They become best friends again after this phase is over probaly in their mid to late 20s.

htdot:
Lol.... you liberal suppprters are not smart...

You that is very smart, why not educate us on the close to 4 million corona deaths recorded by over 220 countries of the world.

htdot:
Yes, it a planned game....

Planned to achieve what goal?

emmyw:
Well, Your Story Is Sweet And The Positive Energy Is Cool, But Which Part Of Enugu Are You From? Because If It's My Side... Hehehehe


I Am An Only Son Too But I Can't Do Such, Getting A Girl Pregnant Before Marrying Her! Dude Common, We Should Stop This Immoral Act!!!!

That's your own personal religious opinions. Some people would not marry a girl unless she gets pregnant first. That's their own personal opinion. You should not judge others by your own personal religious views, that the same think as Boko Haram or ISIS.

benji93:
The Bolded. How would you know this? Only someone with a negative mind would think another person must want something bad to happen to someone else. Stating that, 'pre-marital sex is immoral is a statement of fact according to Christianity. Isn't it? That was what my argument was. I ma using Christianity? The question is what does Christianity say about it? Very simple.

Exodus 22:16
"If a man seduces a virgin who is not pledged to be married and sleeps with her, he must pay the bride-price, and she shall be his wife

benji93:
Unfortunately for you, i believe in the importance of marriage and family. I am bringing in what-ifs, cos i have seen cases where the parents did not marry. We don't all criticize cos we wish others bad you know. Sorry if you have repeatedly met people who constantly do that. You are the one that has the negative mentality if you think i am pointing the immorality out to wish them bad. And please never bring up the "Judge of all mankind" stuff, cos as used by us, it's detrimental to constructive criticism. Judging others would mean i think i am better than them. But no, so the "Judge not others" does not apply here. Besides, honestly, this kind of matter shouldn't be posted here, and so if you do, all opinions should be considered.

I not only believe in the importance of marriage, I am happily married for over a decade.

This is not the place to bring what ifs. If you opened a tread to discuss the negative what-ifs of premarital sex believe me I would not have had a problem, but this is a post of someone happy to be marrying the love of his life.
We have seen many different scenarios. We have seen both positive scenario and negative ones. I have a colleague who slept with his wife the very first day he met her and they have remain married for over 20 years. There are also cases where men married virgins and the marriage did not last 5 years. We have seen the marriages of pastors or even G.Os fail.
My quarrel with you is why duel on negative what-ifs.

And tagging it as "sexual immorality" is not a message for him per say. He's already done it. It's for others to know it's not morally correct to do that. Pregnancy is a consequence you cannot reverse when marriage does not result without damaging yourself(on the part f the woman). Since the number of such occurrences is quite significant, it would be correct to avoid the consequences by avoiding the immoral activity itself. Well it depends on if the audience believes in Christian values anyway. If you don't then the message is not for you. You can move on to something else.

Now the question is, do you believe premarital sex is immoral? If you do then i don't see the purpose of your post. If don't then well, it's not meant for you, sorry.

I do not necessarily see pre marital sex in this modern society as immoral, and I have stated my reasons above. You don't expect a man over 40 or a lady in her late 20s to remain a virgin. In in the old days girls get married soon after puberty and boys marry in their late teens or early twenties, so remaining virgins until marriage was easy.
Trying to stop premarital sex with religious doctrines in modern times is like trying to stop a tsunami with a wall. It will always fail. Sex is controlled by powerful hormones and those hormones don't listen to Jesus or Mohammed. The best solution is either to get married early or practice safe sex.

Drwinz:
Bleep you and the economy...if these were the thought of your parents I bet you wouldn't be alive now

I beg helep me ask am, what was the economy of his parents when they got married. Was his father driving a benz and living in a 2 or 3 bedroom flat in a high brow area?

I don't understand Nigerian again. They will insist you must have good economy before you can marry, but at the same time you must never engage in sex before you marry. Mind you most men cannot acquire good economy legitimately before their 40s. So a man should remain a virgin into his 40s. By that time konji and probably prostrate issues would have killed the guy.

adeniyi65:
In the name of all of my family and the entire inhabitants of abule_ojo village.i will gladly welcome his invitation too if it's to be done in Lagos.

Thank you my brother. Tell OP not to forget to invite the nairaland family o.

benji93:
The first bolded. I definitely made an assumption that I shouldn't have. That the guy was Christian or something. So if he's not and he confronts me I will apologize.

Why should you assume everybody is a Christian? Even if he is a Christian why should you assume he follows your own church doctrine? That makes you not different from northern Muslims that forces people not to drink alcohol or eat pig. Many Christian denominations don't criticize marriages between pregnant brides and their grooms.

my main question is, what if the guy doesn't marry the lady? Which is a possibility. Would that happy story have a happy ending?
I am talking about the institution of marriage here. If that love is any useful it must lead to it. You don't claim to love someone, impregnate them and not marry them. Not good. I hope the guy marries the lady though, wouldn't that be quite the happy ending? Now I am speaking about Christian values here. If he isn't, then it's void.

Maybe you did not read the post well before hitting the reply and submit button. Re read the post to see that the negative serenio you painted above is completely different from what the OP wrote. He is very happy that his parent accepted the love of this life despite her being a different tribe and also accepted the pregnancy. Is it that difficult to be happy for him?

Second bolded:I am sorry, we don't all dream of the bolded. Speak for yourself. Some would rather be married to their fellow tribe member.

You too need to speak for yourself. Some people even prefer to marry from their fellow family member like Abraham and Isaac. That does not mean everyone must follow suit.

benji93:
That would be wicked. We accept the consequences of mistakes too, don't we? The act was bad. What if after a while the man decides not to marry the lady? Now that's the problem. Turning the poor woman into a baby mama. Families build societies, we would be avoiding that by not engaging in premarital sex.I mean that eliminates the Baby mama. Although of course some would say you could use condoms. . The sons and daughters of men will always find a way to circumvent principles and values. We have been doing it from the beginning of time. thing. But well if a woman keeps doing that, as in sleeping with all the men she claims to love, these women become unsatisfied in their marriages. I am not here to judge the act, even though it's immoral(if you are a Christian), but i know the decisions that follow it could be devastating. So avoiding them is key. We should endeavour to lead a moral life. I am partly saying this cos it's becoming incredibly hard to find virgins these days, more like finding a needle in a haystack. . May God mend our crooked ways.

Please learn to be happy for other peoples joy than wish them bad outcomes. The guy never told you he made a mistake. He was so happy and excited and that's why he came to nairaland to share his excitement. Don't dampen his spirit with your negativity.

I wonder why you are wishing that after a while the man would decide not to marry the lady. I know you wish that so you can say " toor" to the lady and feel elated berating her for "sexual immorality" because you are the judge of all mankind. But, it will never happen in God's name. I wish the guy a happy married life and many more happy and healthy children.

Believe me I have not read so much negative vibes to a good happy story before. You are just usinv Christianity to project your negative thoughts and energy. I really hope you find true love someday.

Idiko1:
Ironsi abolished regionalism yet appointed regional military governors. Yoruba peeps have bent of using this crap to justify their lining Fulani, Hausa and Kanuri to prosecute a war against Ndigbo and Biafrans. Decree #34 was for the unification of civil servants in Nigeria. The Emirs taught it took away the power of native authority from them and organized unrest in northern region.

You are now becoming annoying with this your stupid senseless mantra "Ironsi abolished regionalism yet appointed regional military governors" . Appointing regional governors itself is abolishion of regionalism. Who gave Ironsi powers to appoint regional governors? It means the regions were no longer autonomous or part of a federation but a unitary state under the rule of one man.

Is it that you truly don't understand or just trying to be a troll?

htdot:
The virus was a political hoax.... if not there would have been death body littering around the street of naija..

Political hoax in over 200 countries of the world?

benji93:
Although I believe she was too harsh, she wasn' far from the truth, even though she may be engaged in it herself. It's ok to rejoice with them and criticize the action.

Why criticize them for which action. What you guys fail to realize is different strokes for different folks. You don't expect or impose your views on others. That's called religious fundamentalism.

This is a happy story on so many levels. It is a celebration of love and not of hatred that is common in our country today. It a celebration of a detribalize Nigeria we all dream of and not of tribal hatred.

I really respect the parents and wish more Nigerian parent are like that.

Boomboost:
OP got a girl pregnant, his parents are happy for him.

Boom got a girl pregnant, his parents will be embarrassed for him.

You that is reading, will they be happy for you?

Children unlocked before wedlock is a no for me. Maybe we have too many children to bring in another considering the economy.

Children born before, during or after wedlock, it doesn't matter, as long as the parents and families involve are happy and happy to love the child.

You expect the parents to start crying and reject both baby and mother? To many negative people with wicked hearts that hate to see others happy in this country.

kestolove95:
See bad parents, encouraging immoral acts

Bad belle instead of your to rejoice with him you are forming holy Mary. Pray you too find happiness.

obixcel:
That was so weak and pathetic. Who gives or reveals to his enemies secrets and then tells him like, "well this should be off limits, don't attack". And talking about "list" Biden even admitted his handlers gave him a list of reporters who would ask him question The entire stuff was just as creepy and bizarre than one can ever imagine

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B2XeGjddVZY

The answer to the redded question is former president Trump. He reveals all US secrets directly to Putin. So much so that intelligence officials warned their Israeli counterparts to exert caution in sharing top secret information with Donald Trump's administration for fear of it being passed to Russia - https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.newsweek.com/us-officials-warned-israel-not-share-sensitive-intel-trump-609782%3famp=1

Trump's last meeting with Putin was held without any state department official or any other officer in the administration. It was only held with interpreters and they were not allowed to take notes. Trump might as well have given Putin the nuclear codes.

basilico:
BREAKING: Nigerian Citizen Was Dominion ‘County Technician’ For Fulton County In 2020 Election…Nigeria Was Involved With Cambridge Analytica In Election Manipulation



https://creativedestructionmedia.com/investigations/2021/03/05/breaking-nigerian-citizen-was-dominion-county-technician-for-fulton-county-in-2020-election-nigeria-was-involved-with-cambridge-analytica-in-election-manipulation/

You are obviously addicted to right winged media conspiracy theories and need at least a fix a day to function. Do you even read the conspiracy theories to see if it makes sense before rushing to post it on nairaland?
So because a Nigerian citizen was one of the technicians for Dominion voting machines is enough evidence of fraud. You must have very low opinion of Nigerian citizens.
Cambridge Analytica in 2020, a company that was closed down in 2017? How was Nigeria as a country involved with Cambridge Analytica in election manipulation? PDP hired Cambridge Cambridge Analytica to help it manipulate the 2015 presidential election for Jonathan, and it failed - Buhari won. The same Cambridge Analytica was hired by Steve Bannon to manipulate the elections in favour of Trump, and it succeeded. You are now accusing Nigeria of being involved with election manipulation and indicting all Nigerians as criminals. Are you sane at all?

obixcel:
My personal Lord and Saviour is Jesus Christ, a natural man can't take his place, u are just spinning and spewing junks to deflect from d issue. Can u just read ur statement again and see d trash? It doesn't even make any sense. You will say and write anything to deflect. Good job.

You person Lord and savior is Donald J Trump. A perfect man that can never sin or do wrong, a man that was wrongly accused and was cheated out of the the white house ( according to you). He will soon return to the white house in glory to save his beloved from the liberals and Democrats.