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Celebrities / Re: Anna Banner Confirms Relationship With Flavour by jimjones: 2:21pm On Oct 18
Ochillary:
This girl is 19 years old while flavour is 30 years plus

Is your point that they're both adults, or you're just an imbeсile?
Celebrities / Re: Anna Banner Confirms Relationship With Flavour by jimjones: 9:48pm On Oct 17
...and most importantly draws you closer to God.


Hahahaha!! anu mpam.

2 Likes

 
Food / Re: Why Do Nigerians Prefer To Eat Meat At The End Of Their Meal? by jimjones: 9:16am On Oct 03
Like someone already suggested, it may have something to do with the way most of us were raised. I was raised seeing meat as the prize. Like some kids, I hated food growing up, so meat was supposed to be the prize I got for making an acceptable attempt at finishing the food. My mother would lure me in by offering me a nice little piece, and then a nice huge chunk will be dangled -- parts of which will be offered in direct proportionality to the amount of food consumed. Finish the food, you get all the meat! Soon as I figured out my mother's evil plan, I threw a spanner in it. It was fuсk meat from then on. To this day, I couldn't care any less for meat even if I tried. cool

1 Like

Celebrities / Re: Dear Tiwa Savage, You Are NOT Beyonce" - Onyeka Nwelue by jimjones: 3:48pm On Oct 02
First off, who the feck is Onyeka Nwelue? Never 'erd of 'im. Whoever he is, he's got not even the slightest clue what a publicity stunt is. Publicity stunts are designed to get people(mostly the jobless lot(like Nwelue)) talking on end about SНIT. As evidenced by his tweets, this riffraff Nwelue, is doing more to perpetuate the divorce rumors than the very Tiwa Savage he's lashing out on. If jobless fuсkers like Nwelue learn to ignore stories like these, them stories will die natural deaths, and I wouldn't have to see this BS on the frontpage of Nairaland. Fuсkin' imbeсiles.

And these Nairaland moderators sef...walai, it'll be tragic if y'all actually get paid to do the shitty job y'all do on here.

3 Likes

Family / Re: What Do I On Birthdays Of Lost Loved Ones by jimjones: 9:32am On Oct 01
Kill yourself...perhaps you'll then finally figure out that dead is dead, stuрid... Talking about, "might be rude if I do nothing." Rude to who?
Music/Radio / Re: Best Nigerian Music Collabo Ever!! by jimjones: 10:45pm On Sep 28
A lotta great collabos have been mentioned already...but

Ruggedman - Ruggedy Baba ft 9ice.

This is the absolute greatest, IMHO. cool
Family / Re: Real Men Do Not Beat Their Wives by jimjones: 9:56pm On Sep 28
Yea, but they could shake the SНIT out their fuсken assеs, though.
Religion / Re: 54th Independence Anniversary Church Service, On NTA (Photo News) by jimjones: 5:25pm On Sep 28
when are they gonna do the mosque "service"?
Agriculture / Re: Why Can't Apples Grow In Nigeria? by jimjones: 11:31am On Sep 27
himkers:

That's my point. What made it 'dead on arrival?'
Is it a deliberate attempt by the foreign farmers to keep it away from Nigeria (and probably africa)?

Good lord....your way far, charleh. Smh...
Culture / Re: What Is Preventing Africa From Experiencing A Cultural Renaissance? by jimjones: 9:47am On Sep 23
One word - Religion.

1 Like

Celebrities / Re: Bold & Beautiful Nollywood Actresses ( Photos ) by jimjones: 1:37pm On Sep 20
Fat & mostly ugly overly airbrushed women.
Politics / Re: Nigerian Govt Explanation Unacceptable-south Africa by jimjones: 7:55am On Sep 19
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the government of Goodluck Ebele Jonathan.



*stand and applaud*

3 Likes

Politics / Re: Bomb Blast At FCE Kano? by jimjones: 9:10pm On Sep 17
Ttalk: I pray there'll be no casualty

Aren't you special, you fuсking imbeсile!
Politics / Re: Seized Aircraft: CAN Attacks El Rufai, Lai Mohammed by jimjones: 9:04am On Sep 17
So El-rufai peddles falsehoods, and you respond in kind by peddling even bigger falsehoods....and insulting Nigerians in the process. This is what passes for Christianity these days? This is how Jesus "the accused" would've responded?

5 Likes

Nairaland / General / Re: Strange Aircraft Responsible For Building Collapse-TB Joshua by jimjones: 11:28am On Sep 14
Post hoc ergo propter hoc... i'm not the least bit surprised that a revered "prophet" will make this type of logical fallacy.

1 Like

Religion / Re: Atheist Must Swear To God -- Or Leave US Air Force by jimjones: 10:07am On Sep 14
manmustwac: ... There are no out of the closet atheist Senators in White House

To be fair, there are no Senators in the White House. wink tongue

1 Like

Politics / Re: Nigerian Military Release Photos From The Battle In Konduga by jimjones: 1:51am On Sep 14
The Nigerian Army has decided to join the propaganda war? Nobody gives a fuсk how many photographs of abandoned cars they release. When they defeat Boko Haram, we wouldn't need pictures as proof. We'll indeed know. I mean, today they claim they've pushed Boko Haram out of Jerusalem, tomorrow Boko Haram takes Jericho....then they think shitty photos like these will alter the perception Nigerians have of their glaring ineptitude. What's to show that this isn't another photo op? Is it the abandoned car, or the Boko Haram flag?...'cos those weapons could very well have been brought there by the army themselves.
Religion / Re: Synagogue Church Statement On Collapsed Building by jimjones: 11:39am On Sep 13
I have no idea what that statement means.
Politics / Re: GEJ Says The #bringbackgoodluck2015 Banners Should Be Brought Down by jimjones: 10:33am On Sep 10
Goodluck Ebele Jonathan A.K.A doroBuffoon, doroNitwit, doroBastard.

4 Likes 1 Share

Religion / Re: Chris Oyakhilome's Lawyer Threatens To Sue Media Houses by jimjones: 2:59pm On Sep 04

Characterizing the media's coverage of his wife's efforts to divorce him as “complete distortion of the facts in the pending proceedings in the United Kingdom”, the statement cited the coverage as "selfishly motivated" for political and financial advantage.

Really?!...for political advantage? hahahahahaha!! Wetin persin nor go hear for dis naija? Well let me just say that this is clearly the fault of GEJ and PDP....and now APC crying fowl trying to score cheap points! Yes, mr lawyer?...am i close?..Thunda faya you.

1 Like

Music/Radio / Re: Official Video: P-square Ft T.I - Ejeajo by jimjones: 12:49pm On Aug 30
Evidently, Chris Brown has sparked a fire under their asses. Godspeed fellas.
Celebrities / Re: New Pictures Of The Aneke Twins by jimjones: 1:59pm On Aug 27
Alright now, who the fuсk are these?

1 Like

Health / Re: Airport Authorities Announce New Measures For Ebola by jimjones: 12:33am On Aug 01
Idiоts. Always reactive, never proactive. This disease has been around the subregion for months, but these idiоts in government will only wait until someone dies of the fuсken disease in the Nigeria before they decide to do the needful.
Education / Re: Another Nationwide ASUU Strike? by jimjones: 5:07pm On Jul 31
Wittywizard: Good evening my fellow nairalanders.. I heard about the ASUU forthcoming strike but it seems the rumours is only been circulated in my school(UniAbuja). I just want to be sure that it is a Romours or not a rumours. Please is the ongoing proposed strike news been heard in other various institution or it is jus being heard in my school..
Thank you

What i wanna know is how you got into university. Jesus-farkin-christ!
Education / Re: I Never Had Sex With Any Man —21 Year Old KWASU Best Graduating Student by jimjones: 10:01am On Jul 16
Woopty-fuсking-doo! With that ratface, i'll be goddamned if she can get someone to fuсk her before she's 50.


On the bright side, congrats on the graduation!
Family / Re: Options Available For Same A.s Genotype Couple by jimjones: 7:59am On Jul 13
The question should be "Options Available For Same A.s Genotype Couple interested in having children."

There are tons of same genotype couples, not least AS couples, out in the world with no interest in procreation.
Family / Re: Why Are Some Marriages So Boring? by jimjones: 9:17am On Jul 12
Hexzyz: The reason is people don't depend on God for his perfect will in marriage. They go by what they see. God knows the heart of every individual and who is perfect for each other.

idiat.

1 Like

Religion / Re: Traditionalists Demand Public Holidays, Board, Political Appointments by jimjones: 9:18am On Jul 06
Seems pretty legit.
Celebrities / Re: Charly Boy Disgraces Okorocha At Oputa’s Burial Over N20M For Arrangements by jimjones: 4:18pm On Jun 28


According to a statement by the Seniour Special Assistant, SSA, Media, to Governor Okorocha, Mr Sam Onwuemodo, “It is highly regrettable that the son of the late Justice, Mr Charles Emeka Oputa, aka, Charly Boy, threw caution to the wind and turned the church service into a political theatre that saw him acting or playing out the script he drafted in Abuja with some Imo politicians, who have remained cowed by the overwhelming popularity of Governor Rochas Okorocha.”

Onwuemeodo insisted that the state government made “substantial financial input and also organized a special day of tributes for the late Justice Oputa at the expense of state government with Charly Boy also present with other members of the family.

”We condemn that ugly incident and also wish to advise politicians from the state to stop heating up the polity over power since God is the giver of power. In 2015, God will decide who will be governor of Imo State and when God decides that, there is nothing anybody can do about it.”


And right there's exactly the reason why Charlie Boy was 1000% right to nip that sh!!!t in the bud. A funeral service in honor of a man of impeccable character like Justice Oputa, should under no circumstances, be turned into a political theater. That's no way to show respect.

1 Like

Nairaland / General / Re: My Experience With A Native Doctor by jimjones: 2:41pm On Jan 06
Jerrick: Anytime I think about the scenario, I laugh and just shake my head. It was Christmas week and I went visiting my Uncle who stays in Ibadan. On 23 December, my uncle gave me some documents to get them photocopied. It's a known fact and no news that my uncle is the very stingy type. He calculated all I would spend and he made sure I won't be left with no change, imagine? undecided.

Anyways, in no time, I was on bike and I arrived my destination. I alighted from the bike and went to the shop where I will get those document photocopied! But as I was going, I noticed something strange frm afar. It was a man dressed in red clothe with something in his hand. I watched him for some time and I noticed he was conversing with people he sees on the road. I walked very fast cos I was scared. When I asked those people in shop what the man was doing, they said he's a native doctor and that he collects money frm people whenever Christmas is near.

I could hardly swallow my saliva cos I was scared. I have never seen a native doctor except in films, let alone conversing with one. When he was close to the shop I was, I could clearly see he's got a horn with him. The horn is wielded with red and black cloth. I wanted to run at first but I saw a lady beside me, I noticed she wasn't as nervous or agitated like I was. This boosted my confidence and I decided to stay! cool. The native doc got to the shop I was and stopped...... Ghen ghen!! sad

Seriously, I was standing but 'dead' and buried in fear. I don't know maybe because of the supra canvas I wore or my nice outfit, he approached me. They've already told me the native doc approaches those he sees as rich people. Because if you see me that day ehn, u go confuse me with dangote's son cool #fact undecided. So, he pointed the horn to me and said money. I initially wanted to rebuke him by calling Jesus but I never wanted to fall my own hands infront of the babe, I kept quiet and hoped for the 'worst' grin . I handed him 1 hundred naira. He collected it, looked at me and further pointed the ugly horn at me, he kept on saying money!

When I noticed he was going to touch me with his ugly horn, I moved back. I started to empty my pocket, swearing that the 1 hundred naira was all I had on me grin he danced and left... Phewww, that was close, I thought in my mind. Those I met in the shop laughed @ me that I was doing like a weakly! I too was laughing but my legs were shaking...... I left the shop and trekked home. I got home and never uttered any word to my uncle. He ignorantly asked, ''why were you that late?'' I said people were too many that we'all had to queue. A very stingy man he is undecided

imbеcile...with a stuрid name. what the hell kinda name is jerrik?

1 Like

Culture / Re: Which Is The Easiest Nigerian Language To Learn? by jimjones: 6:03pm On Jan 05
DankemzI:

Ibibio is a Nigerian Language spoken by the South Eastern people of Akwa Ibom & Cross River.

Rеtard. ibibio is neither spoken in Cross River nor by Cross Riverians. And akwaibom is not in the southeast.

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