₦airaland Forum

IconicR:
It is how you try to normalize cheating for me, I don't know who thought you guys that whenever you have issues with your wife, the solution is to quickly land in another lady's bossom. Most of you married men don't even consider your kids when erection is involved, while faulting her please try and access yourself as well. As for your wife I'll advise you give her time she'll definitely outgrow her bad habits. You see why I don't want to ever have anything to do with a man less than 35yrs, a man above this age are so matured and know how to handle and tame their wife. The face I make when a 35 and below is toasting me.

Good advice though.



But if I toast you you won't accept me??

Silentgroper:
I'm only being logical .



Enlighten me...

The guy you replied is trying to reply someone that said her friends can not poison her, that a good friend will not do that to her. And the guy replied her by saying she would be dead b4 she realizes.

But you're now asking how will you know if a friend poisoned his or her close friend? The guy is not trying to explain the aftermath outcome of the poisoning, but trying to make that girl know that it will be too late for her to know if her friend killed her. By then she will be dead gone.

TemplarLandry:
This mushroom lawyer should go sit down.
Business is business.

You this mushroom nairalander should shut the Bleep up.

ednut1:
This one is doing PR for Nigeria women in the Uk. If they have all those qualities listed up there men will be rushing them. They are mostly being avoided for obvious reasons 😆. The average Nigerian woman abroad has this over inflated ego just because she don japa. Tufiakwa

I don't think he's talking about those Nigerian girls that japa as a result of looking for survival with their pussy or rich white man that will come and approach them. He's directly or indirectly referring to those ones that grew up there, stayed there for long, or was born there and also has good productive skills to offer, their mentality is totally different from this one's that forcefully left as a result of APC bad governance and has no good thing to offer.



I have a friend who went there on 3 months IT through British council , he also said thesame thing. That the Nigerians he met there are so nice and happy to see him, specifically an igbo girl he met there took him out several times to take coffee. Very nice according to him.

Silentgroper:
how does a dead person later realize his/her friend got him/her poisoned ??🙄🙄🙄🙄

Do you really understand the point he's trying to mak?

meobizy:
Anybody who poisons you is not your friend.

You think say everybody wey dey close to you na him be your friend ? Those ones close to you are the ones you need to watch out for wen you're making it, jealousy easily creeps into the mind of many wen dey see you succeeding.

Rapmoney:
Don't be fooled by social media. Many young people in Nigeria are not in relationships. This includes both male and female genders. It is even worse for people who are above 30 due to so many financial expectations, commitments, bills over bills, poor economy, terrible hard-hitting economic policies by the government, high level of unemployment and inflation. Young people are becoming more withdrawn. There is a fast decline in our social life; I mean how we interact with one another face to face. It will amaze you to know the number of young people who see their electronic gadgets as their partners.

It is pertinent to note that the above mentioned problems have caused a chain reaction in the society where young women now prefer hookup to dating...sex business aka 'If you give me cash, I'll give you the Bermuda Triangle'. You cannot separate poverty/economic hardship from a socially and culturally warped society.

Which way Nigerian youths?

The effect of bad leadership has trickle down to various areas of our society including our social and religious life.


Everything has been monetized, that's why many men hardly engage in relationship ,and the women are complaining bitterly of men not marrying them. You can't blame the men for taking such decision, one finds it difficult to feed himself, talk more of feeding a whole family. My friends who are married are complaining bitterly, it's not easy for most people now o.

Jennyclay:
I’m deeply in Love with Elon musk for no reason

Gold-digger on the beat........

ibechris:
U must be very lucky to be among this age brackets.

That is because most of us who just clocked 40 or above can not reverse the hands of nature.

However, this the time and age when u should have nothing to do with laziness especially the men amongst u, hustle, work smart and hard if possible, do not cheat to enrich yourselves... it will backfire badly.

Save money, this is one crucial area that most of us don't keep up with. Many see this as the biggest task ever and like I have written in one of my writes up here, it was the money I saved during my early age as a student and during my service year that has made me what I am today. Save to invest, without savings u can't invest.

Avoid friends who only take from u, there is a motive in every relationship except for the needy among us, any relationship that is one sided and takes more from u...brothers and sisters, pls run oh.

Education is good but learn a handiwork, it is essentially important, especially a trade. U can never go wrong in it. Most igbo guys have demystified these areas and have hit it big time. The situation in the country has forwarned us that, there is not future for many in 8-5 jobs these days as most guys wished they had learnt a trade before now. After NYSC many of u will understand what I am trying to say.

Have a target, there is no rich man without a target, in fact, every organisation has its own target which they intend to achieve within a given time.

Learn to discuss ur plans with ur parents and see how far u can go...but in all, plan your life adequately

Take risk...it is very important u engage yourself in business that is profitable and risky at times and this will help u to be smart and better in any engagement u find yourself. To add to this, i have never seen or heard any rich man that has not lost money but there are many countless poor men and women who have never lost money,hence their poverty.

Finally, plan your life early and live a good live afterwards.

Good luck.

❤💯👍👍

Alexxx2000:
As the headline states. What enters your mind when you immediately have money in your account or your hand?

Mine is my FAMILY.

What is yours?

I use mine to aid my career, support my family, do some little commitments and take care of myself.

LikeAking:
Quiet!

Hahahaha

ConfusePoint:
Ranting. Ranting. Ranting.

I have decided to rant out my predicaments on this forum today.

What is the way out of poverty for me?

One inlaw is even living with us, making it 8 in number, all in one room.

This thing don come big pass me.

I know most of you here would blame me for impregnating a woman to give birth to that number of children but then, life is life. It happens like that sometimes.

They say a poor man's prayer is "e go better" but instead of things to get better in Nigeria, everyday things get worse.

Truth is, except I drive myself out of this mess to a better life for me and my children, this poverty that is so stricken will likely be extended to my children, which I really don't want.

No two ways about it except ...

But like a car without tyres, can it move even if it has fuel? Definitely no.

For 4 days now, I sleep outside in an abandoned car because of financial war at home. I can't go back home and I even feel like never to go back there but should I abandon them like that and run away? To where?

When I went to the market the other day with 5k to buy food items for the house, I was crying and talking to myself on my way back because I came back with almost nothing.

Nigeria have succeed to plug life out of poor Nigerians. The poor cannot breathe again. Let's die and go.

Advice: never give birth when you are not financially strong. Unfortunately, I've learned my lesson the hard way.

Life happens.

How do I help this family better than I am trying?

Wishing you the best in all you do.

First of all, blame yourself for your family current predicament. You brought it all upon yourself and family all because you fail to plan, and now you're blaming the government, is it the government that told you to be giving birth without planning for your children?? We all know things are hand now, but you have to be sensitive and plan ahead. How do you expect 48k to cater for the wellbeing of 8 individuals? Is not possible.

One of the major principles of success is to take 100% responsibility of your actions. So if you want to move forward stop the blame game, strategise and plan with your wife on how to change your financial situation around, if is for you to start saving no matter how little do it. If is to start a side hustle aside your salary work, do it. This is the time to put your brain to work and stop blaming Tinubu because he will not help you. And Dont ever think of running away from your family.


Goodluck sir.

Peachy14:
Home builder
Amebo mate
Prayer warrior
Delicacy preparer
Play mate
Adviser
Help meet....

Hmmmm


We're watching closely.

saphiere:
You all are rapists. Deal with that truth.

Werey.........

Bitecoin:
See liability calling herself the prize

Hahahahahahahaha


The thing sef tire me o

IconicR:
Obi is just forcing himself on people . There's something very fishy about him , I can see through him.

You're too blinded spiritually and physically to see and understand the force behind obi and the obidient movement.

Samantha124:
They see married men as responsible men.

And truth be told, it's only responsible men who think of marriage.

But I've never been attracted to a married man before.

They follow married men becaus of money. Simple.

GO0DHardDick:
Brain dey pain u?

Obi won Edo state hands down

Why you dey answer the bushman

orohbiro:
Nigerians by the time Tinubu is done

Hahahahahahahaha

OZIOGU1:
I will appreciate if you say some men are becoming lazy, but that said, From your narrative your husband or boyfriend probably is sitting doing nothing waiting for you to feed him, that's his choice, men like us work work for our wife to enjoy, in the last 15 yrs of my working career, i ensure my wife is placed on a salary, as of today she earns 100k monthly from me in addition to her 350k salary...please for once some of you should respect Men, remember your blessing is right at his door step.

You don't need to explain further for that demented fellow to understand.

Dogalmighty17:
Your dumbness never ceases to amaze. Why are you so bitter. ?

She's only explaining the true nature of her daddy, so just allow her display her madness.

Skyview01:
I have seen situations where the wife is very wealthy and there are kids in the family. My question is, can you as a man, leave your job to become a full time house-husband, taking care of the kids and the home while your wife works at her very lucrative job?

Only a man that has lost his dignity and pride will do that.

Blankstare:
Haba... your eyes must be paining you

Back to sender

uche87:
Virtually every week, a Nigerian abroad comes out on social media to lament the scarcity of partners for meaningful romantic relationships. In recent times, we have had a more frequent outcry from women. Not just average women but beautiful and classy ones. What do you think is the problem? Are the men going extinct? Let's dive into this topic from a UK experience.

Have you ever felt lonely despite being in a very crowded space? It is a weird feeling. Everybody wants to help and at the same time, nobody wants to help. This is what dating in the United Kingdom seems like.

Here are some reasons why it might be challenging finding a partner abroad:

(1) Culture shock:

The United Kingdom is a multicultural society. You get to meet Indians, Africans, Chinese, Pakistanis, Europeans, and generally people from different works of life. Their belief systems, behaviours, and different approach to issues are different. People naturally avoid what they find strange and this could affect romantic relationships.

(2) Ethnic Division

In most cities in the UK, people don't mix especially outside work. The people have doctorate degrees in 'minding their businesses'. The Chinese roll with the Chinese, Indians to Indians and Nigerians roll with their own. People just feel more comfortable with their own.

(3) Too fast, too busy:

Life in the UK is just too busy and fast especially if you are a fresh immigrant. You might have to deal with the rigours of work and school as they run concurrently. These two engagements might make a whole year look like 6 months. Oftentimes, romantic relationships take a secondary position. Some people would pick shifts over romantic dates because that is what pays the bills.

(4) Historical concerns:

Before the tier 4 visas became popular, most Africans saw the locals as keys to their stay in the country. Relationships have always been a means to an end in the UK. A selfish end so to speak. The nefarious activities of internet fraudsters have always complicated interracial relationships. For this reason, most tier 4 visa holders or citizens are wary of new entrants.

A lady who holds a British passport or Tier 2 visa might doubt the love interest of a suitor holding a tourist or student visa. There is widespread distrust in the country and nobody wants to be used as a ladder to step up. Consequently, some potential good men slip under the radar.

(5) Stereotype:

Nigerians don't have the best reputation in the UK. This is related to the previous point made. This has led to hasty generalisation and unwarranted assumptions. On dating sites/apps, some people will not talk to you because you are a Nigerian. This might be due to an adverse experience or an ordeal told by a friend, or family member about their experience with a Nigerian.

(6) Ego:

The UK has so many successful women. Most of them become big-headed as career success and financial breakthroughs come. They tend to desire men in or above their social/economic class. But African men in their supposed class fear women like them because of issues around control. Men don't want to travel on a ship with two captains. Before you know it, one woman is still single at 40 despite her beauty and achievements.

(7) Small population of Nigerians:

Despite the Japa Syndrome, Nigerians are in the minority in the UK. Out of a population of over 67 million people, Nigerians account for just 0.5% which is 271,390 in England and Wales. Most Nigerians come to the UK married. These two factors limit the available options on who to date. Even if you want to consider someone outside your ethnic background, they might not be interested in you.

( Racism

Due to the sensitivity of this topic, I will not dwell too much on it. It has been criminalized, but it is still what it is. Coloured people are not really in demand except for people who just want to briefly explore. Call that jungle fever!

(9) Lack of intentional efforts:

In the UK, you have to consciously work towards getting married. Attend social gatherings, meet people, shoot your shots, join dating apps, join churches, approach people for relationship referrals, and never give up when you hear a 'no'. You might just be lucky the next time you try.

(10) Marriage isn't a big deal:

People in the UK are not so big on marriage compared to their counterparts in Africa. I have a colleague who has been engaged for years; nothing is happening and nobody is under pressure. In Nigeria, people will ask questions like "Are you Froddo in the 'Lord of the Rings'?"
Generally, people just live together as partners for years and have kids together without being married. An African might frown at this on cultural and religious grounds.

(10a) Accent:

Relationships start with active and good communication. In the UK, some accents are just too complicated to understand. This makes verbal communication stressful. Most people become easily uninterested in those that don't speak like them.

(10b) Indiscriminate sex:

Due to loneliness and cold weather, most people just want to have fun with no strings attached. They want to experience that crazy feeling of intimacy for the moment. Since society doesn't attach importance to 'body counts', people jump on as many beds as possible. This is paramount amongst single parents. Single mothers just want to drink alcohol on Friday nights and have sex without entanglements. They tend to enjoy their sexual freedom and conclude that serious relationships might take that away. If care isn't taken, a woman might wake up to realize that she has had more sexual partners than a full-time prostitute at the end of the year. Sex is easy, love is hard.

These are some of the reasons I have been able to come up with. I'm pretty sure they could be extended.

Conclusion

It is possible to find love in the UK, although it is tricky. The key is being very intentional about the love search. From my personal research and experience, I believe the most effective way is through referrals. When you meet nice people, tell them to introduce you to their like-minded single friends or family members. Make your intentions clear. This is equivalent to getting references for a job application. Additionally, expand your social circles, and join African churches with huge members. Some pastors take it upon themselves to matchmake people and it works. Dating apps might not be the most ideal place to seek a meaningful relationship, but we never say never.

Osahon George Osayimwen writes from England.

Noted sir



Good write up 👍

kenbee:
Honestly, Nigerians are loving people generally until seed of ethnic and religious sentiments was planted in us just to divide us.

Exactly.

Benblaq:
Would you fault this result on the students or lecturer?

The lecturer is at fault. The school Senate should summon him or her. Asap.

Jazmine10:
Why is infidelity among both sexes on the rise in Nigeria and what can be done to mitigate it?

Number one of them is poverty. That thing has cheaply cause divide , domestic violence, quarrels etc.


Fear poverty, but our leaders brought this upon us.

Essenza01:
What is more illogical than thinking you have monopoly of violence and saying "the SW wont sit watching".. first of all differentiate SW from Tinubu's rodents.. secondly, if you had any iota of reasoning, you would see you made no remark near logical comment.

Best reply ever 💯👍👍

Morbeta11:
Pity yourself ...obi is a billionaire, if at all you are a car owner, fuel is almost 700 per litre...worry about yourself.

Hahahahahahahaha

fourboys:
She is fast aging abi na my eyes

I thought am the only one that noticed it. She look dry, old and sick.