₦airaland Forum

emmaodet:
Hmmmmmmmmmm

You are truly right.
Had a friend whose mother and him usually come closer to us then and wanted me to date and marry their daughter because they believe I am doing fine and has good future.
He was struggling with 30k job here in nigeria before his mum processed US visa for him 10 years ago.
When he left, they all started avoiding us and feels they are better than us. I don’t know who gave them that perception anyway.
He started come in and out of nigeria silently to avoid only God knows who.
My parent were disappointed when they mistakenly met at the bank.
My dad was like….. when did you come to nigeria? Since when? And you didn’t contact your friend?
Life.
We moveee

It makes one wonder what the people we come in contact with want from us: to enjoy our company, or to use us ruthlessly?

I sometimes think of that person. Wonder how decades of "friendship" vanished just like that. I can understand why they would do it, I can understand that it is jealousy today.

Lord help us all to stay above human evil in this world.

qtguru:
You only learn Kotlin when you know Java to a degree. It's meant to be easier. You can use Kotlin for Spring boot and Android

Humbly disagree, sir.

Farfalla:
I understand you were probably making the commentary in jest, but then again, this is Nairaland and someone reading your statement may take your word as God's own truth, retain it, and echo it elsewhere. I assure you.

Afterall, is it not on this same forum where some mammals believe that shît is stored in the arse, taking antibiotics after sex is a contraceptive method, and big bréasts are an indication of promiscuity in women?

For the sake of the zombies who never question anything they read on NL, 'Nairobi' comes from the Maasai phrase 'Enkare Nyrobi', which translates to “cool waters" or "the place of cool waters". It really has nothing to do with the Naira nor Peter Obi.

LMFAO

Please, where did you see that one?

Farfalla:
Sure. Suicides and homicides are distinctively Kenyan vices.

Lol. Best believe it.

MufasaLion:
That was a foolish move. There are more better ways to show your grievances.

Death by fire or death by bullets, all are death. How can one show their grievances against death?

abobote:
Your mom actually cares

Nobody on this earth cares about anyone else.

Not even the bond of parenthood will change that.

valentineuwakwe:
First day in need and see if anyone will come to your aid despite being nice and helpful in the past to them.

That's human nature for you. Humans are selfish and evil things at heart.

No matter how nice and sacrificial you are to/for a person, they wouldn't raise a finger for you in the littlest of things. Most of them are jealous of you, waiting for when they can gloat, and you'll never know that until you eventually do. I can't tell you the deep jealous cruelty I never knew my "friend" had for me, until I didn't have something they had. I was not even asking for something, just didn't happen to have what they had when they had it. It was a painful, hard lesson, and I couldn't understand why then. Now I do.

The only thing you can do with humans is make acquaintances of them. Friendship is for the weak. Help for the weakest.

Ancient vehicle that is probably used to carry more than it's threshold after soaking in the endless Nigerian rain, without any coating for years.

Yes, it's potholed roads behind this.

Drag and drop... Is what what people use VCS for nowadays?

Oh lawd.

This is one of the strangest, most disturbing threads on this forum.

Klass99:

Hi you, I'm just seeing this. How've you been?

I'm okay. As I'm sure you are.

Klass99:
!

This eraser you're wielding is pretty big.

oliverwrites:
Dont judge anyone unless you know what they have been through.

I have suffered from depression for years and i dont drink, I don't smoke, I don't womanize and I am 35 too.

I make on a poor month what the OP's "friend" has as savings. I have three beautiful daughters who mean the world to me and a lovely wife.

Yet still have to battle depression. Don't judge.

The majority of Nigerians don't know what depression is.

FireUpNow:
FYI there is nor age limit to education so the guy graduating at 35 shouldn't be an issue at all. What I blame him for , he should started his life with that amount of money. That's were he made the mistake

Don't mind him. University was not made for teenagers in the first place.

anochuko01:
No wonder he finished school at 35.

He never had sense

Not true.

People finish their university degrees at any age, and sometimes due to certain factors they finish off late.
It has little to do with sense.

His friend simply went through a rough patch. He's not really asked him what happened.

ExudeLoveToAll:
Your analogy doesn't click , "the man supposedly keeps his earning secret and pays bills and then you assert is same thing as woman keeping her earning secret and not paying bills".

Partnership in business is when the owners pull their resources together in order to make the business better. It is different from sole proprietorship where an individual takes decision necessary for the betterment of the business taking little consideration from his employees.

It depends on where the marriage is heading, is it a partnership relationship or a sole proprietorship relationship. If it is a sole proprietorship relationship the woman has no right to ask for the man's income but if it is a partnership she doesn't even need to ask all secrets will be revealed to her. That's how life works.

One can't expect to lay emphasis on padding the recurrent expenditure of the family simply because she doesn't know what it is to make money and make financial contribution to the home front and still expect that the budget will be accented to by the president in subsequent years.

In synopsis, a person who is ready is partnership is ready to be given top security clearance to all classified information.

Why should women be expected to pay bills and not also hide their incomes, like men are saying men should do, so that everyone in the relationship will pretend not to have money for things that need to be paid for? Or is it only men who know what it means to work for their keep?

Let everyone lie about their incomes, and nobody should complain that the other doesn't want to pick the bills.

Exactly how women feel when a promiscuous man marries them. And the man with his tremendous body count will feel entitled to marrying a young, nubile virgin.

I can feel your anger. Lol. Funny OP.

If it will make you feel better, you can go out and have your fun. Nothing is sacred, anyway, and you have your reasons for once loving her.

You can later become a loving husband as she has later become a loving wife.

ednut1:
you see women come online to guilt trip men or form good person. But in reality they are not. Same happened to a tenant tho lost his job. He opened wine shop for the wife. Madam no gree drop money for rent o. The dude owed my mum for long

If a man should keep his earnings secret, why shouldn't a woman keep her earnings secret and refuse to pay any bills, too?

Reminderz:
so according to you David, Adam and the likes is a sinner because they married more than one wife? which kind joke be this??

so na person wey marry only one nor be sinner? so you wise pass these people wey you mention? omoo I tire for your matter ooo

Are you a Christian or a Jew? Or a Muslim?

This is a pointless "discussion".

Until you can determine what religion you really are, and if I'm willing to engage in such mind numbing "discussions" again.

It's interesting to note you haven't answered a single question. Rather you pick one line and run around like a chicken with its head half cut off it's neck, all in a bid to avoid straight up responses.

Rest.

Reminderz:
there are polyandrous women but polyandry is not supported according to the Bible.. only polygyny or polygamy is supported according to the Bible ..


polyandry is a sin... sephini

It's not a sin. It's simply not your preference. Because where is polygamy a command or supported in the Bible?

Leave Canaan and get into Israel. Then leave Israel and get into Christianity. Then you'll know what is what.

Henceforth the discussion is pointless if you cannot understand eras in the Bible. Eras change but never lust.

Reminderz:
leemao I dey quote Bible verse you dey talk say how I came up with polygamy? na me write Bible? abi you wise pass people wey marry more than one wife for Bible? shey you nor fit read Bible ni? the fact that a particular person you mentioned didn't marry more than one didn't mean that it is not valid to marry more than one.. that's the person's choice...

okay since Jesus didn't marry at all, does that mean marrying is a sin? Omo how una dey think like this? and again there's nothing like new testament Christian, Bible didn't mention that, Jesus didn't mention that.. Jesus is not a Christian but a Jew just like Moses...

that's why he said he didn't come to abolish those laws given to the prophet before him but to fulfill them, read your Bible naa

I'm not interested in your dances in support of polygamy. Answer my questions.

I don't care about polygamy, but for sex and ego driven men to claim it was a commandment of Jesus, that's a bit of a stretch from you.

You are either Jewish or of any other polygamous religion if you believe polygamy is of the Christian God. Polygamy isn't the Christian standard.

And if you are an adherent of the old testament, why run away from all its cultures? Why cherry pick what suits you because it's similar to what you're sex drive tells you is right?

Reminderz:
see you let me give you some good reasons why God gave allowance for polygamy and not polyandry... abi you think say God dey make mistake ni

1) we have more male than female.. in the west alone, we have more than 9m female than male.. shey if we start to dey marry one each.. who go marry the rest.. you sef think am?

2) men are the providers and the breadwinners, so we have the capacity to provide for families... we've been doing that since ages . this is not a woman job.. so men are more than capable to marry more than one and take care of all of them

3) the amount of seeds men ejaculate during love making alone should tell you that it's not just meant for a woman.. it's not the same with women as her eggs depletes as she ages..

4) men can get a woman pregnant, menopause is not inherent in men but in women..

5) men are the one doing the dangerous works which make their turnout low, so we have so many women dying to have a man, that's why we have so many women dating married women, baby mamas side chics


6) the rate of birth of women is higher than men, and the rate of death of men is higher than that of women

would you rather allow polygamy or allow having baby mama, side chics or homosexuals... which one is more difficult and more riskier ?

There are no reasons for polygamy as a Christian, except that you're a Jew or Muslim.

If you're Jewish or a follower of Islam, don't mix it up with Christianity. Or if as a Christian you're actually an African traditionalist, don't mix it up with Christianity.

All your reasons violate what Jesus said about marriage when he spoke about divorcing. But that's okay, because you're only human, right, under the law of Christian grace, right? You have grace to be a polygamist if you please.

Your fight about polyandrous women doesn't mean anything, because there are polyandrous christians just as there are polygamist Christians. They have that same grace.

And your scientific misinformation is amusing. Why wouldn't a man need that much ejaculate when it is only one sperm that will ever fertilize an egg? How many men can populate multiple births? How many twins and triplets are there worldwide to support your psedo- scientific argument for polygamy?

Quinex2:
Aside those with the mantle of kingship (i.e. the kings) in the bible that had multiple wives, polygamy was never condoned elsewhere. When Sarah forced Abraham to take in Haggai, but later decided she no longer wants her, Haggai was sent out and her seed rejected.

Besides, those in the old testament weren't Christians, they never met Christ. Christianity began after the death of Jesus.

Polygamy may sound interesting to you because you enjoy multiple wives, but the odds outweigh all that. Most of my muslim friends from polygamous families almost never have good stories to tell, just a few do.

Don't get it wrong, for Christians, the monogamy charge in the new testament is so compelling that even at the point of divorce, you can't take another wife/husband while your first is still alive. Else, you commit adultery. In this case, Yul was cheating on his wife and mistakenly got his accomplice pregnant, then went ahead to marry her behind May's back. No true Christian would accept that. A muslim? Yea, because their faith allows it.

Nigerian men are Christian polygamists. Their understanding of their Bibles is limited to their desire for sex and domination, so if they support Judaism it's not a big deal to them, provided it is their pleasure and sex at stake. When they need more grace to sin some more and look for solutions to their problems, they will fall back on their Christian imperfection theory which promises them riches.

Hallelujah.

Reminderz:
go and ask Jesus and your Bible that question... because it was Jesus that said it, or you want to change what Jesus said?

Have fun with your Judaism. Keep misinterpreting Christianity to suit your ends. Or did Ananias have more than one wife? Did any of the new testament christians have more than one wife? And was it permitted?

How you read your Bibles and come up with polygamy is pathetic. You didn't see holiness, consecration and abstinence from sex. Just polygamy.

Hallelujah.

Reminderz:
lol you didn't even bring a fact from the Bible to support your posts... even Jesus you mentioned said he didn't come to abolish those laws before him but to follow it.. . you mentioned that those that came before Jesus like Moses and the likes weren't Christian.. lol of course they weren't Christian... they were Jews... Jesus was not a Christian, he was a jew and a messenger just like Moses.. Jesus never called his followers Christians... there is no place in the Bible where the world Christian or Christianity is mentioned, so I don't know who you guys are following... read isiah 4v1 and exodus 21v10 to understand the Bible you claim to read... lol so you're saying those that came before Jesus aren't in the right path abi... leemao

I still stand on my point, show me in the Bible where it's a sin to marry more than one wife or a place where its stated clearly and unambiguously that you should marry ONLY ONE? if you don't bring any proof, then you are just saying based on your own feelings and tuitions not verifiable proofs

When will we begin to stone people to death for premarital sex and adultery again? Since we aren't abolishing anything.

The allure of polygamy to Nigerian men is mostly sex and ego driven. Outside of that, you have nothing to applaud in polygamy.

When it suits you, you want to be Jews. When you want "the grace" to sin like David, you are suddenly christians.

Reminderz:
which one be olosho? why you nor call Regina Daniels olosho when she marry Ned? abi she nor get boyfriend wey she dey date before? why una dey reason so low like this... if you're a Christian, show me in your Bible where dey tell you to marry only one? how many wives Adam, David, Solomon marry? abi you wise or holy pass dem these ones?

Do you pay tithes?

Have you been stoned to death for having premarital sex and adultery?

Do you eat meat and dairy on the same plate?

Do you eat animals without cloven feet? Shellfish?

If you can answer these questions honestly, you'll get deeper insight into what you're saying about polygamy

pocohantas:
She should rest already.
You are still bearing his name.
Obviously still living in the house you both have always lived in.

He was at your birthday and you guys took pictures together.

If you don’t want to do, leave!

I understand that she is hurt, but all these things are not defined by word of mouth or social media posts.

Since she is still there, she should stop posting nonsense. Stay calm and grab what you can.

No dey post to impress social media in-laws. They don’t send you!




Na love na. I too gbadun Naija men. Even first love and virtuous wife must taste from their wickedness.

She's in denial. Doesn't want to be in a polygamous relationship but too ashamed or scared to leave. Well, she can have him half the time, and she's okay with that.

Yet she's living in the same house as them, and celebrating her birthday with her polygamist husband. This woman is in denial.

Angelfrost:
Been married for many years sir!

I ain't ranting nor capping! I stand by what I said!

Getting attracted is normal... Choosing to leave it at the level of attraction is not impossible! Matter of fact, I have done it for so long it has become a daily habit!

Not everyone can resist it. Not everyone should.

Angelfrost:
Sigh... I will never understand what people gain from adultery.

Not a religious nor superstitious person, but I just can't sleep with another man's wife no matter how attractive, sexy, and available she is! The very thought of it disgusts me deeply!

Some men and women even have the boldness to do it on the person's matrimonial bed, like what the fvck!

Are you married? If you are, you'll know that what you typed are rants and that anyone can get attracted to another person's spouse. Even if it's merely lust.

Such is life.

Slymontee:
What is this? Russia is devilish.This is unfair, inhuman, totally insane!

Not as if they've been sending Russian POWs to the Hilton themselves. This media war will never reflect the two sides equitably. There's too much propaganda at work.

Quick recovery to all prisoners of war, mind and body.

luizpippo:
Someone is helping you will you are an helpless cripple and you are feeling ungrateful, she even topped it up with kpekus.

Regarding her jealous look, if you were the one tending to a babe like she has devoted her life to doing for you, you'd feel same way too.

How much do you feel a live in caregiver would charge you monthly to take care of you?
Then try and pay such amount into her account monthly, so when you are back on your feet and she wants to claim i did it for love, you can in turn claim you felt that money paid for her services.

Lol.

Wicked truth.