₦airaland Forum

eni4real:
Bukatyne, the life Coach
You are on point

Hahahahaha at Life Coach.

I am realizing I am extremely lucky my parents built my self esteem so I naturally sought a good/nice guy with equally healthy self-esteem who would treat me well and I would reciprocate.

When I read half of the dramas on NL and observe stuff around me, I honestly wonder.

eni4real:
The op

If you are a good guy with healthy self esteem, you should know that girls like those in the OP are damaged and not for you.

If with all your goodness, you now end with someone with her, you have yourself to blame.

The OP mentions in Africa.

Let us take Nigeria as a case study.

Why right is the girl child denied today?

Let's start with that.

CaveAdullam:
I can't believe my eyes......ubunja is back....lol

They don't understand women's dual mating strategy. So, let the simps keep on wailing.

Simps giving advices........o my goodness

Leave your cave and go out more.

Dual mating strategy is not a woman's thing. It is human thing.

That is why some men have holy wenge sex with their wives and have side chics they don nasty things with.

Those side chics are also holy wengez with their men.

A lot of men expect a certain kind of sex from women they consider good enough as wives.

Wives also don't want the husbands to think they are one kain.

Which is one of the reasons of adultery.

These are generations.

eni4real:
Stop dashing Good guy's hope Jo!

who is dashing the good guy's hopes?

stanliwise:
Remember to tell the redpiller kings to be a virgin so that they too can marry a virgin wife, if so then you are doing a good job. If not then that is one place the so called protestant(The feminist) have problems with your kind. Because most of them are created by your kind after your kind use and dump them.

It will be a contradiction to encouraged non-virgin males to avoid non-virgin females. This is because he who wants to live in a glass house don't throw stones.

Just like Neil strauss said "You can only win if can quit the game". I have mastered enough of social intelligence and am moving away to something greater, when you are ready you too can alight from the ever moving train with no end.

#DropPen
#WalksOutOfThread.
#Goodbye

The Truth sounds like a good read. 'A been there done that' kind of thing.

Where can I get it?

stanliwise:
well said.
IMO I even advise most guys not to join the redpill bus. You may never know when you have gotten to your bustop.
People should read social intelligence books.
I recommend Neil strauss.
He wrote "The game" which talk about being a game player.
He wrote "The truth", the aftermath of a player life and the dead end of such road and how to keep important people you.

Even time I read red pill, I laugh because it is not sustainable.

It is in stages: the Alpha Bleep of today is the Beta Bucks in the next ten years.

In the Alpha Bleep years, the guy might have lost the woman who truly loves and believes in him. At that stage, all he has are his visions and how to achieve them. He laughs at the Beta Buck until he realizes 20 years later, he has done same thing:

Hustled hard do he will get a wife that will 'respect' him aka Beta Bucks

Everything in this life has principles: any deviation most likely ends in tears.

This thread further highlights why parents should train their kids to have high self esteem and place a premium on themselves.

How can a guy who has high self esteem, place a premium on time and emotions be friend zoned?

If I am not good enough to be your boyfriend /lover or if you have one, go meet him when you need an errand boy. How can a guy under the guise of 'nice guy' invest his emotions in someone not reciprocating?

How can a girl claim to be naive and stay with a guy that treats her like trash? Where is her instinct of self preservation to say 'I feel disrespected by X, Y and Z? And address the concerns she has?

Is it lack of love at home or dysfunctionality that lets someone choose emotional pain instead of pleasure?

The problem is not the' niceness of the guy': the problem is his lack of assertion and not knowing his worth.

That's why I will always be a fan of relatively young relationships. Mr. Nice Guy and Ms. Nice girl meet young and stay with themselves.

Parents, train your kids well emotionally.

Funkyswagzz:
Do u know hard it's to find ppl like that on daily basis? As for girls it is very easy buh they won't make there move.

Nothing good comes easy.

Are you implying it is easier for girls to find faithful guys than guys get a faithful lady?

Ghanaians leading the weird coffins' department.

lightdream:
Just imagine. hence the need to get it right.one-off

True especially if you are not someone who takes marriage vows lightly or believe in divorce.

stanliwise:
Same for you too, I know you are the author of the so-called red-pills on nairaland. As much as your opinion seem effective against some set of women. It is very dangerous when used against genuine people in ones life. I rest my case.

A wholesome lady with healthy self-esteem would not fall for the red pill gimmicks in the first place.

You should be suspect of any lady you get practicing Ubunj.a's theories. There is a defect somewhere.

etrange:
Until you learn to treat people individually based on their personalities and not collectively based on their gender, you might just keep running in circles. If you meet your girl somewhere in the world and decide not to treat her nicely because some girl on social media who is "one of them" has said so, you'll have yourself to hold responsible for whatever turn your relationship takes.

You are celebrating this post cause it is from one of them but the numerous posts from many of them that say you should treat them nicely are forgotten. Fact is, you only picked this cause it appeals to your already structured line of thought.

If you're not nice, you're not. If you're nice, you won't think about it before being nice to your lover. If your being nice sends her away, thank your stars and look for someone receptive of your nice nature. And if you're not nice, someone who likes un-nice guys will gladly take you. Just don't claim you're doing it for the ladies, you are who you are.

@bold:

Words on Marble.

@OP:

People should know their worth and NOT settle for less. If you are a nice guy that stayed focus while younger, look for a wholesome woman that can appreciate the niceness to the table. Not the one broken or gone through the 'hoe' phrase aka explorers.

If as a young girl you stayed focus and kept your self sexually or had has minimal partners as possible, watch out for a nice guy that appreciate and deserve the wholesomeness you bring to the table.

Let the hoes and other garden tools enjoy themselves.

I am today years old when I realized Kelly Clarkson's 'Because of you' is actually about an abusive father/dysfunctional home and not an abusive lover.

Parents, please let us do better. We lay the foundation of how our kids navigate this world emotionally except they consciously take the effort to heal.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ra-Om7UMSJc&list=RD8YzabSdk7ZA&index=20

Your husband ALWAYS told you his dream was to relocate.

That dream has come true now.

Instead of fighting him, why don't you engage and find out what his plans are and contribute?

It is easier to get your husband to listen to you when you are on his side.

optimusprime2:
Is everyone missing the key detail that, "She is actually Australian?"

And runtown is about to acquire a 2nd citizenship... from Australia.

Congrats to Runtown he has indeed ran out of town.

@bold:


Hahahahahahahaha!

syluck:
You don't like her dark skin colour doesn't mean you should call her ugly. You're just a sadist bro.

Bringing Igbo into this now shows how inconsequential you can be.

You want your girl white, runtown wants his black. So what's the fuss?

Our Lady actually looks good and fresh close up.

I am pleasantly surprised.

vincentjk:
Nigerians keep badmouthing and saying all sort of hate speech about this lady saying she's too dark and ugly lol.

These Sudanese girls black beauty models when dey chop better money for Europe with their killer shape and and dark colour

Killer shape?

Perhaps you meant that literally.

light099:
A wise man once said, "if you want to break conventions or norm, take things to higher grounds, not back to ground zero."

Let's even say you were lucky to finally meet the doppelganger of your crush, that doesn't mean you should be too much in a hurry or impulsive, as not to check if he/she is worthy version or an extremely low-budget version.
Adut Akech no doubt looks like Lupita Nyong, but then, at least we all know Lupita still has this sexy looks and curvy body frame. As for Akech, where is her selling point?
White women have good skin and hair, but not the body. Black women have the good body but may not have the skin and hair. Each race with it's selling points.

Unfortunately, these whites folks envious of the great bodies of black women have been selling their skinny body, blackboard-yansh ideologies under the guise of modelling. In a bid to be a model, you traded away your black endowment, and ended up looking like a transmission pole.

Ghana women don't have the best looks but they have the best bodies, and this selling point is high as fvck, it could make an Indian man sell all his property just for a video session with them on Whatsapp or FB messenger.
But here is Akech, no hair, no skin and then no body.
Personally, I'm not impressed.

Anyways, congrats Runtown, I know you always have this irresistible urge to do unconventional shiits, same way you got a lion cub the other day, but your games are always risky. Let us hope it won't end in tears.

Ha!

Madam Toke ooooo

Just stay off what you don't understand.

lightdream:
I was almost there if I had listened but made my mind up never to do such.when my ex was traveling out to US. My friends insist I pour the liquor mk I no free am like dat. Though my ex was seeking greener pastures with her mom.I just held to my faith that I won't stop her destiny just because of my selfish interest. She was brilliant, opened to learning and open mind.I just encouraged her to do better hustle then enrol in school that the future await her for greatest. I luv the girl dearly but I let nature takes it place.behold nine months to her departure babe go get belle ontop say oldman assist her and her mum for accommodation. Today,she is now a mother of one. She was brainwashed, fast played because of papers. No more school, just paperchasing.The contacts I gave her overs were shocked & warned me never!!! put your mind ontop wuman, wifey wey you send go abroad.closed.

Good one.

What if the the person you want to tie down is not your destined wife or husband?

xynerise:
Not easy for guys who are already sexually active

Nothing good comes easy

NerdyRudeGyal:
Never happened to me. Don't do premarital sex. That said, we're in the era of golddiging men and brostitutes, so it's not a farfetched idea to think it does happen. I had a guy tell me he recently that he wanted me to have his seed after he approached me at the grocery store. I quickly finished my shopping and got outta there. What a creep

I can imagine how you felt.

Abstinence is the best policy.

Nooil:
Don't mind them, when they don't read their Bible. The father is the head, God didn't make a mistake appointing him as one. The simple rule, love your wife, and she will make your house a home.

Please to every woman out there, if you have a deadbeat husband or you're a single mother who is not on talking terms with your baby daddy, look for a respectable and successful man who will mentor your son. If that's the only thing you can do for them in life.

Only men can successfully make men (their sons or mentees) . A woman will turn a man into a petty, foul-mouthed weakling. Don't leave life to chance.

@bold:

I agree.

Munzy14:
Some Maids are better home managers than oga's spoilt lazy daughters who spent most time slaying on Instagram and watching all movie series on Zee world.

Maids gets the best home training atimes from the madam and everyone else involved by virtue of excessive chores.


Even in some settings, comfortable families do send their daughters on holiday to that of other relatives to give them a sense of survival away from comfort zone...It is still part of training.


My dad will always tell us, when we send u guys on errands and chores, we are teaching and equipping you guys with things u will need to survive later in life..As a grown up those grills back then paid off nowadays.

@bold:

There is a difference between a maid managing her madam's home unintentionally and forcefully and a wife managing her home.

Two different things, two different attitudes to the table.

These girls are simply beautiful sha.

Akhirastriver:
Muniru is different from munir

It is the Yoruba version. Same as Shakiratu, Muniratu, Aishatu, Nasifatu,

Most Islamic names that end with 'tu', 't', or 'u' are the Yorubalized version of them.

The Muslimahs in my secondary school used to vex that year.

Especially as we are expected to be 'posh' and 'enlightened'

Or you do not add the 'tu' and call them rat, E.g. Munirat.

@Regina's tattoo:

I align with Kim Kardashian: You don't scratch or put a sticker on a Lamborghini.

As exceptions, I know someone who tattooed the name of her baby she lost.

phemmyfour:
Muniru? Ugly name

That is the Yorubalized version.

It is Munir.

xynerise:
Every girl that had unprotected sex should always believe she will get pregnant. Don't trust a guy without condom when he tells you he didn't cum inside. That's dumb of you.

I have heard of poked condoms

sisisioge:
They are like any regular couple. The chick was very outgoing and chicky then...guy would always visit her every weekend or ask her to visit. Anyways, after the deed, he got her a car and made her very comfy. This moved her status upward and made her the envy of everyone...she soon accepted her situation and even flaunted it. You know they say we grow everyday, a car then was the ultimate pacifier...now maybe a house will do the trick

Interesting.

At least the guy was willing to pacify her after getting what he wanted.

baby124:
Men do it a lot. Especially the ones that can go multiple rounds at once. They pretend like they didn’t ejaculate.

Men do it with girls they want but are not ready for commitment or to upgrade from side guy to main guy. You will see them fighting taku taku over the pregnancy because they know what they did. If in the case the main guy thinks the pregnancy is his.

Some sick ones do it for just doing it sake, because they just want to keep impregnating people and creating drama. Those ones are attention seekers. They hope the girl won’t abort. These kinds will make the girls life completely miserable. Most times don’t have money or vision for their lives.

Summary: Men do it as much as women so both sexes should insist on protection. The specialists in the act are those who say girls that carry condom are ashewo. Na lie. They have bad intentions.

@bold:

Sick does not even start to define this behavior.

Munzy14:
Bolded explained the bone of contention.


Anything that happens outside this is a case of A smart guy vs a dumb and uninformed lady..Internet is a university on its own, where anyone can get enlightened.

The lady might be naive especially if the guy was her first.