₦airaland Forum

Alot of men are very logical beings and except they choose to ignore sometimes cant ignore some things that happen esp in pentecostal churches.My hubby was born in the Anglican communion and i was born a muslim and converted.I go to a pentecostal church cos i really was not feeling spiritually in tune with the whole church of england thing.He agreed for me to worship where i want and has gone with me to church a few times.To be honest the way he keeps asking for scriptural.backup for stuff esp monetary part can be so annoying(and sometimes he is right).So its back to the church of england for him.The kids go with him most times and sometimes with me.I am really thinking of going back with him cos i am really battling my spirit man on some things in my present church.

As will say may God help us all.

jydogirl12: Byvan, getting tubes tied permanently or Tubal Ligation is major surgery achieved easily via csection ( or other unrelated abdominal surgery), the procedure is called Laparotomy ....Fallopian tubes are sealed shut and put put back into place.

There are other 2 related procedure too; Laparoscopy ( photo- like colonoscopy, gbam!) ; a rodlike lens instrument is inserted via a tiny opening/ incision and they view ( you too) it on the screen while the Fal tubes are clamped.

The other one is the min-laparoscopy; small incision made beside your kitty and Fal tubes pulled out and clamped simples!

Very effective.... if you missed your period, menopause is knocking .

It's reverse able too-$5k only/ IVF.

How do I know all that^^^ I did the baddest one

Naaaa my liver has cut at this kain of procedures.If i have to do it oga too must do.vasectomy (very touchy subject for men )but afterall there is love in sharing.

MMotimo: Don't know how many times this issue comes up in this section but I will say what I have always said. Culturally, Nigerian women, especially Southerners have been raised to believe that you have to bring in an income in order for your spouse and his family to respect you. Never mind that you have abused women with full time jobs.

A lot of people think staying at home makes it more likely your husband will abuse you. Please, spend time on courtship, know whom you are marrying. If hes going to be an abuser, chances are, you will see signs if you spend enough time in courtship. A very small minority of men can change overnight into monsters but that is not the norm. By the way, be careful that you, the wife, do not change into something the guy did not bargain for. If you were the saving type before he married you but afterwards, suddenly develop a taste for keeping up with the Joneses, that would not be fair to him.

Staying home (usually the woman in African settings) is a lifestyle choice and is determined by affordability and trust. I bolden this because for most people, it's not affordable but that does not mean you disparage others who can afford the choice. Above all, it should always be a joint decision and like most things in life, subject to change if it is not sustainble. No point doing it if one partner resents the other partner staying home or if it is not an affordable choice for your family

If the working partner's income is not sufficient to finance household expenses, you probably should not opt for it. When I say expense, that includes aso ebi, your Brazillian weaves, owambe parties, vacations, clothing, etc and any financial assistance to relatives/friends on both sides. I may be able to run my household on N50000.00 a month but maybe yours runs on $8000.00 per month. The same question still applies - can the working partner sustain the expenses? If so, for how long and at what cost?

At this point, I must say that if you don't have direct access to the income earner's accounts/earnings, if your assets and liabilities are not in joint names, then you should probably not stay home. Already, there's a comma in the situation if only one party makes and controls the financial decisions. In order for it to be successful, there has to be trust on both sides and each side should be comfortable with the other's spending habits.

Life insurance policies are available in Nigeria, same as in the West. It is called insurance in case the unexpected happens, fear of death should not mean you can't stay home and raise your kids if that is your family's desire. Sadly, the vast majority of Nigerian women that work, still have no net worth to show for it. It is still the constant hand to mouth, keeping up with the Joneses, dodging randy bosses at work who derive joy from chopping another man's wife.

Why are you staying home? For the vast majority, it's to raise their kids. For a few, it's simply a preference. If your spouse is fine with it and you can both make it work, do not let the mischievous sow discord in your home by calling you names.

If part of your self worth is tied to your career or how much money you make, it's probably not a good idea. For some people, working is not about money but about self worth/esteem
If you are going to miss the workplace environment, you should probably just keep working. If you are going to feel embarrassed and useless because you are not working, then keep working.

A much as possible, let your value system be based on experiences, not on acquisitions. I tell you, life becomes so much simpler once it's no longer just about acquisitions. Focus on building NW while at the same time, building your children (those that make the choice for kids).

Finally, yes, I stayed home for a couple of years, in Naija and in the West. I work now, because our kids are much older/independent and household expenses have grown. My extended family do not pry in my business so I didn't have to explain to anybody but I know it took a lot for my Mum not to say anything. She started working at 18 and only retired when she had a solid gold pension and left with a sizable package. If she were dead, she might have turned in her grave, she drummed career mum into me at an early age.

I stayed home but I have always had access to everything my husband has/earns and vice versa. I am that wife that knows where everything is and whose husband will "sign here" without a second glance because of mutual trust. It doesn't matter which gender plays the lead financial role, trust is non-negotiable when it comes to money, epecially for a Naija couple.

Nails it for me.+100 likes.Though it has to be said that for a naija couple,trust is a subjective word.All in all,koko is for me,analyse YOUR own peculiar situation and marriage and do what works for YOU.Though i think if you have to ASK for money for soup,chances are you really have no business staying at home.

chaircover: Lol Ladies stop being scared of opening shop after hours jooooor. . .these things happen Accidental kids are the most spoilt cos they tend to come when their parents are more financially secure and more settled. They come to enjoy

Im on the pill and in spite of having packs in every handbag, my office drawer, my bedroom, kitchen drawers, my car, the bathroom etc I still forget . I keep on meaning to get rod implants but Ive just never got round to it. So if an accident does happen, I know that it is my fault.

however Its really strange because now that Ive tasted the freedom of having older children and have got my life back, I should be the one running 440 from any accidental pregnancy but im more careless now than before. God help me

Aunty CC its not acciddent then o. am sure ur princess would love a lil bro cos i remember you saying she was good with younger kids.So e jara mo.

I was actually on the pill when my son was concieved .I actually wanted a 3 and a half yr gap but me and my careless self.Even anti biotics my hubby has to hound me to finish my dosage.Me and medication are not friends so jejely went for the coil.And when the doctor said there was a ten yr one i jumped on it.

@byvan, :-XCan i be daring enough to get my tubes tied.I dont know o.Hoping someone can shed light on that

jydogirl12: Dami admit it, you want more children.

I laugh under the table when I hear women say they are taking birth control pills while they're done having children.

Why not Kuku do the Tubal Ligation and get it over with?

Tee can you stop following me around? I've[url][/url] prayed for forgiveness and starting ; afresh .

Noooooooooooo More kids ke.Naaa.Me i am useless at the whole pill thing so decided to get an IUS fitted.And went for the ten year one.

I sincerely am happy with the two i have.Everyone says il change my mind when my son is 5 but i dont think so.Hubby actually wanted one(weirdo),i said 2 or 3 so we met halfway at 2.
My mum keeps shaking her head,saying i cant believe you actually just want jack.and jill

jydogirl12: All these old school parenting style's Cons outweighs its Pros..... But I've learnt my lesson to lock my Ray-Ban on and pretend it never happened.

@ Topic
Why should I instil fear in my preteen girl when I knew what it is not to have that close relationship that age?
( yeah go ahead and mock me again)

What kind of respect exactly do I need from a child that I can't get with a more reasonable approach?

@ .... I can Never hit my child(ren), I don't need any bragado/shakara to pass my message across.

Dami, I was never scared of anybody except my dad , and I wouldn't call that a scare cos we are like buddies, it's kinda like I don't wanna let Daddy down kinda feeling to check myself when I misbehave, I learnt all basic home training, morals, respect, and etiquette without any shakara

@Princess , you did well with the fiction approach than screaming/ hitting.

All in all Family section Rules; Whatever works for anybody.

And oh this is Jidegirl.

I get what you mean sis by the over doing it.But you know kids esp those under 5 have short attention span.Sometimes you need the shock factor(not necesarily flogging and screaming) cos believe me for some kids explaining and talking does not work.I do take on board the fact that being petrified of your parents is not necesarrily the best cos for some people that fear defines the relationship for life.

Nowadays i find that a LOOK sometimes speaks words and i dont need to talk before i hear sorry mummy.Been practising that LOOK and i have gotten it to a tee

MRbrownJAY: sadly thats because people dont spend enough time educating and raising their children the right way. blackmail and fear is the easy way out that just turns any kid into fearing their parent instead of respecting them..... no matter how we look at it, it is wrong and we only accept it because our inadequate parents did the same to us and we came out "ok".

yes people are ok today after fearing their parents all their lives, but the catch is that they could be 10 times better if they were raised with love and respect, so that they can raise/teach the same to their own children. how can anyone say they came out ok when they still have no clue as to how to raise their own children?!

Sir ok practical question here,how do you use love and respect to tell a 3 yr old who you have explained to a million times that its dangerous to accept things from strangers without mummy's permission? Its an hypothetical question cos i wont lie i scared my 3 yr old into looking at me or asking before accepting stuff even in our house.I have no regrets too
Not too long we heard of a psycho who was giving lil kids bleach in Mcdonalds.

And when.i say scared i dont mean screaming or hitting.I simply told her that sometimes people give things that might not be nice or might hurt her tummy(i esp meant church cos there is one lady that gives out sweets and chocs a dime a dozen, like its going out of fashion not saying i dont give treats but we have a limit).So befores she eats stuff she needs to see if its something she is allowed to have.It took a while but now its second nature for her to look at me (if am there) or ask.am i allowed to have it.Lil kids are lil kids they are moved by what they see if there is no caution they can eat 50 sweets a day if they are allowed.

Birth control messing up*gulps* Now that is one scary thought.

Dear Lord in heaven i reject being part of the 1% that counts against the effectiveness of my chosen birth control method.amin loruko jesu.

BUT if it is your will i gladly accept and trust that you will in turn provide us with the bucketloads of money that means i never have to answer yessir to anyone again.Amin ashe

Baby mama: [size=18pt]Church responds[/size]


The Overcomer’s Church World Outreach, where the wedding between Nollywood actor Solomon Akiyesi
to a new wife was disrupted today by his legitimate wife, has responded.......

The church’s response
What was meant to be a day of celebration – the wedding ceremony of one of our members Uloma Agwu to Mr. Solomon Akiyesi at the Overcomers Church World Outreach in Aguda – was sullied by an ugly incident. Immediately following the praise and worship session and before the officiating commenced, a woman who claims to be the lawful wife of the groom disrupted the ceremony.
She was accompanied by people who sought only to wreck havoc in the church.
They were unruly and violent. We regret the ugly series of events that followed this brash display.
At the Overcomers Church, we do our due diligence to ensure a couple set to wed is right in the eyes of the law and in the eyes of God.

To the best of our knowledge, Mr. Akiyesi, was unmarried. The Overcomers Church World Outreach regrets that the woman who disrupted the wedding chose such a time to do so. There is no ideal situation here, but it would have been right that she bring the case before church officials in a manner befitting a house of worship. This was not the case.

The groom, Mr. Akiyesi, has apologized to the Church, his bride-to-be, Ms. Agwu, and family and friends that gathered for the wedding. “This happened because I tried to cut corners,” he said. He admits he did not properly dissolve his previous marriage to his first wife and says he is determined to do what is necessary to rectify the awful situation. We apologize for the ugly scene this caused at our Church and
apologize to those who witnessed it. It is not exemplary behavior and not who we are as a Church.
The General Overseer of the Overcomers Church World Outreach, Bishop N.E. Moses, addressed the congregation
after order was restored.

Bishop Moses prayed for the couple, Mr. Akiyesi and Ms.Agwu, but he did not legally wed them – no documents were signed so as not to disobey the law. Mr. Solomon Akiyesi and Ms Uloma Agwu will not be legally joined together until the matter is properly settled by lawful authorities.

Our Bishop has urged us to take a lesson from this and be careful of the decisions we make in life, so the consequences don’t hurt us in the future. It is a lesson we take well. We stand by Ms. Agwu. She has been a dedicated member of the church and we will continue to support her and Mr. Akiyesi. It is our hope and prayer that in all of this, God is glorified and His house of worship above reproach.

Chika Moses
Media Representative,
Overcomers Church World Outreach

Uhhhhhm.Seriously some churches just dey fall hand.So the wife is the one who gets the blame? Just because sis Uloma is a "dedicated member" of the church?"Dedicated member" who was not punished for even getting pregnant before marriage(not judging here cos no one holy pass just upset the wife gets the blame)?See why some people are getting disillusioned with the whole pentecostal thing(FYI i am.a member of a pentecostal church so i am not church bashing).Am sure part of her "dedication" is regular tithe paying.

Lord we need you more now than ever before.

free2ryhme: [img]http://3.bp..com/-cPasLjHfcGQ/UWnYfq8wqKI/AAAAAAABm7I/UEm95WzMCZ8/s400/262792_4241723845593_249984425_n.jpg[/img]


[img]http://1.bp..com/-xG6j-hjLWSQ/UWnZLbFOnYI/AAAAAAABm7Q/IfU3BKJqwoI/s1600/solomon+akiyesi+lindaikejiblog2.png[/img]

Gosh Ode is anyone saying you should not "take away what will TRUNCATE your life"(i wonder who taught him english )?Dont do it the coward's way.Divorce your wife and pay child support or tell her you want to take a second wife(for those saying polygamy is our original nature,my great grandmother was at the igbeyawos of all her co-wives abi).So pls dont want to live in todays world and practise todays religion and still want to do what obtained in the days of old.I hate cussing ppl out but this man is indeed an oloshious fellow.Look at his face

taryour: Op abeg nothing do you jare, my mum siad more than that us. I remember clearly in my mothers words "I gave birth to you and I will kill you and nobody will hold me for anything" yes oo and you needed to see us then doing our chores rightly. My siblings and I even use the statements on ourselves in my mum' absence oo. Truthfully that fear did wonders in our individual lives if not a lot would have happened,to raise 4 girls and a boy no be small matter o.

LOL at 'i will kill you'.My mum would say then i will flog you to stupor if you faint i will take you to the hospital and when you get better we continue .She too also used to say i gave birth to you so i can kill you if i want

naijababe: Damiso! Iwo ati awon threads eh yi sha


Personally, I think your kids fearing you at a certain age is healthy. Every one of my siblings and I wondered at some point if we were adopted, so iyen kii se biggie.

I'd much prefer my kids fearing me wella than any nonsense respect abeg! When they turn 18 and move away from home, we'll start talking about respect

Naijababe abi kini afe se.Nkan ti Uk so wa di niyen,to baje a wa leko ati jo owambe nlo .Daddy wa o tun si nile so kama carry go ni.

I think you are right ojare.To be honest,fear of my mum made me sit up alot though i think that her own was a tad bit excessive.Iya o.That woman they never born you well.It did affect her relationship with my siblings abit though.They as adults are still a lil scared of her and cant seem to have that adult relationship that she now so.much wants.Me sef na now till i married sef and i was working o i used to be scared to go out and come back late.Friends will say lets go out for drinks after work and i would say i have to be home by 10.I was 25+ at this point. My colleagues just used to shake their heads.

My hubby even still thinks am.scared of her( i wonder who asked for his psyche analysis )cos when she is coming over he says my cleaning takes it another notch higher,like am scared she will say the kitchen has dirt behind the worktop

Good eve peeps.Hope everyone has been having a good weekend so far?Well this afternoon me and my daughter got into our usual tussle over hair making and after exhausting all the haribo sweets in the bag(yeah yeah i know but what can i do now) and the tears were still rolling down we had to resort to good ole fashioned blackmail,i got out scissors and threatened chopping the hair all off.As she knows princesses dont have short hair she quickly stopped crying and we were able to finish the hair.I kinda felt bad threatening her but a woman got to do what a woman got to do .

It got me thinking about my own mum and how i was raised.I actually think my mum wanted.me to be scared of her.To be honest alot of things i was pushed to do was actually cos i was scared of consequences.I studied hard for Waec and jamb cos my mum said if i did not pass at one seating it was to go and learn hair dressing(i think that was a bluff but i was not about to find out otherwise).I could not even borrow stuff from my friends cos i was scared i was in trouble if my mum caught me wearing it.

I know its not politically correct in this neo modern age but afterall the bible even says The FEAR of the Lord is the begginning of all wisdom,is a lil fear esp for pre pubescent kids really really that evil?
I personally would want my kids to respect and not fear me but looking back now i think a healthy fear of my parents held me back from doing some things.It certainly did me no harm though then i used to secretly wonder if i was adopted .

So parents and guardians what's your take?

Gosh jidegirl i dont understand why you had to descend to this level.I do know you are not one to ignore insults to the yoruba tribe but ejooo the level of insults and bile were too much kilode.Ejoo sis its not like am picking on you or anything but unlike the other culprits me and you have banter(and i know we disagree alot) but abeg let peace reign.We really should not waste our emotions on hate esp on someone you cant even see or know from Adam.As CC said life is too short and real life comes with its own attendant stress and rigour than trading insults and curses(sis u fall my hand at that point olopa ewo tenpe )over cyberspace.

Haan haan child spacing come turn to world war 3.Ko da o.

Maybe am naive or i have not jammed but is it really possible to HAVE or WANT s...ex every night i.e 365 days a year? I dont think its possible.As in every SINGLE night??I think its a tad bit exagerrated.He could want it alot maybe 5 to 6 times a week but every SINGLE day...... .Even men get tired naa

ileobatojo: I don't agree that ability to be pregnant and bear a child is the strongest reason for supporting stay at home wives but the OP has mentioned some stronger points over the course of the thread.

That being said, I could not personally be a housewife with no income waiting for someone to feed me everyday.


I will disagree with the assertion that the domestic duties of a woman have no economic value. Of course they do! If you were to hire different people to do all that she does, moreso for a woman with young kids, you might have appreciation for the economic value of the housewife. Some organizaions have tried to economically quantify the domestic work a woman does and it is no small amount. There are many families where one of the spouses decides to stay at home instead of working primarily because of economic reasons.

I agree OP had some iffy points( eg The man should go out and make more money )on a SAHM not being a liability but in SOME cases the wife working might not be of any real FINANCIAL(since financial liability seems to be the main bone of contention for most people) impact to the family. That said earning your keep does wonders for one's psyche regardless of how much you make.

Also family planning plays a big role,no chop my head but its harder for a woman with 5 kids under 8 to work esp in the west where there is no cheap labour.Imagine the cost of childcare,breakfast club, afterschool club etc.Its easier to have a career with fewer kids.

OP i think you might have to redefine the roles of a wife as maybe childrearing,homekeeping and s...ex might not necessarily be a good argument for not being a liability.Same as the question"Does she have a job?" is not doing some guys any favours.Its not just having a job its what is her outlook to life that should be more of a concern.

This argument again Abeg let everyone do what works for their family.

I personally have to earn an income its just the way i am wired. However a woman who does not work in the FORMAL sense(cos there seems to be this misonception esp among naija guys that you must knack suit and 6 inch heels to be working ) MIGHT not be a financial liability.
I know someone who is a housewife(very derogatory term IMO)but hubby delegates alot of stuff too that he is unable to see to due to his 9 to 5 job.She is more less like an independent financial.advisor.I feel she is more an asset than the working class lady who feels her own money is for ferragamo,brazilian weave and aso ebi cos hubby is the man and must pay ALL the bills.And yes there are women like that.I have had friends say to me they chose the most expensive schools,apartments etc so that by the time he pays all the bills there is no money left for Sina(yoruba word for womanising).His money is ours and my money is mine.Those ARE liabilities(not saying u cant spend your money how u deem fit sha).

jidegirl12: Thanks Baby , I agree with being responsible , it's just very hard for them to pull off perfectly when they're still very young, poor Goldie( fish ) died without cause suddenly God knows why/how/what happened.
I ( & hubby) have to walk the poor boy ( Puppy)everytime Exhausting I tell ya.

Like you suggested, I'll let them try the cleaning the pen from now on, some parents are just particular bout the perfection without doing it all over again.

Bed making is not a problem, as you lay your bed they say

Now cleaning the clutter, hummm pointing fingers she did it , no she did, not me is exhausting too, I end up doing it most times.

Dami, sis I hear you, but lemme confess , dinner time is always a mess except on weekends so, not much table to set up.

The middle child broke a stack of dishes helping unload the dishwasher!

Sorting laundry, I've never tried, thanks a lot .

Cooking? What part of cooking? I'm scared for burning hazard.

Yeah sis thats why i said with supervision.As you have said you have already started with peeling maggi(which my daughter too loves licking so i quickly collect ),give me the oil,pass me the onions etc.Now my daughter even thinks she is the one who bakes cupcakes after na me do all the measuring .You know all this oyinbo stuff now lasagne,chilli con carne,pasta(easy stuff)then we move on to our tiwa tiwa food.And advocating this for both of them not just the girl.

At least if they get introduced to how food is made it might prevent an unhealthier eating lifestyle later on i.e takeaways and ready meals(i hate those things).

Making sure they lay their bed every morning and do a weekly proper clean of their room,my 3yr old can pat down her duvet but trying to teach her to lay her bed afterall she sleeps on it.

Tidying up generally after themselves.

Loading the washing machine(after you must have sorted cos u dont a white top becoming pink ) and by eight they can start sorting with supervision.

Laying the table for dinner

By eight loading the dishwasher if you have one

Me i want my kids to be independent as soon as possible so my daughter(3)already helps in the kitchen and my son.too as soon as he is old enough.So by 8 i expect some level of cooking(with me watching though safety issues).

Cant think of any more at the mo

Nashville: Dont bother yourself and no need to feel jealous. You know why you live in the UK and I am sure you are pretty comfortable too. What she did not tell you is that some of those things she has in Nigeria are absolute necessities. Try driving yourself from Mainland to Island everyday and you will realise you need a driver. Most houses dont have washing machine and that is why they have washaman. Life can be tough in Nigeria if you dont have help and lots of money. No light, sometimes no water, security issues, all sorts of house repairs, etc. There is a price to pay for everything. Abroad the price you pay is called taxes. At home you keep the cash to pay a nanny, gateman, washaman, driver, OPC, bribe police etc. It works out to almost the same thing.

Do not think you are missing much if anything. Nigerians just like to pose and form,

not be surprised if your cousin flew the cheapest airline to come to London. I have had some guest who have done the same thing. They will even expect you to drop everything else you are doing just to attend to them. Something they will never do if you visit 9ja. Not everyone is like that but just a few I must say!

Of course i have had some guests that i almost cried when they were leaving.And funny enough one of such is from a very very very wealthy background.A 20 yr old for that matter.Believe me rich or poor how you raise your kids matter.I am different from my husband in that way cos i was raised in a household where we always had people living with us so i dont mind having guests per se.I have been a house guest too and i know what is expected and how to behave so i guess its just a personal thing and not necessarily cos she lives in Nigeria.As Ujujoan said its not necessarily everyone who lives in Nigeria that believes in live in help.

Vikin: OP, your cousin visited you and you are complaining and looking for where to rant off!

I wish I have like 5 of that your cousin with me now. She go work tire, next time she will go straight to a hotel without even informing me she is around. just kidding!

On a serious note, she is your cousin and since you guys were close those yrs, you should be able to know how to put her in her place and stop all these whining you are doing. If you don't like something, you say it!
What's wrong with telling her your piece of mind while enjoying the moment you have with her instead of waiting for Wednesday to come by.

Next time when she comes back, let her help in changing the kids diapers or make herself useful. If you don't know how to diplomatically do it, create a thread for it, am sure you will get answers.



On other story, what's up with this pineapple thing! When you have a Lott of things you can use instata to get the groove moving

I get your point about me telling her what i dont like,i have actually said to her how expensive it is to get an au pair,how i have a method and routine in place(which she has seen)to make life easy,how hubby helps to lessen the burden bla bla but in the end i just decided to say Ok i don hear abi ,i just dont think its nice to be replying her remarks when my husband is also giving sharp retorts.Its not nice to create an uncomfortable atmosphere for a guest as it might seem like we are ganging up on her.

Though i dont think she will come back,i think she finds hubby a tad bit tooo blunt.I dont know why he must have a retort to everything,last night's argument(on the back of Mrs Thatchers death) was how political office should not be a ticket to massive wealth like it is in Nigeria.I knew he was throwing veiled barbs and i kept shooting him dirty looks to keep his mouth shut.Believe me i think she also cant wait to leave .Who knows she might have a thread on NL somewhere ranting bout hubby.

Who are the people who take these gory pictures

May she be healed by His Grace

Double post

jidegirl12: @baby123..... I watched KKs marathon yesterday, I found a new discovery ..... Pineapple juice makes your Vag taste delicious.... Luckily I love pineapple juice, no wonder babè can't get enough

Jidegirl se wa,Sun dey form small though weather forecast predicts more cold towards the end of the week,imagine wearing winter jacket in April.SMH for british weather.

As per KK you will not believe who inducted me to guilty pleasure of the Kardashian clan,my alhaja mother .I just heard se e ni E mo fe wo awon Kardashian emi ati T ma wo every week(pls do you have E,i want to watch Kardashians me and T watch it every week) .I was like mummy we dont watch IQ reducing things in this house.Sha watched it with her and been hooked,guilty pleasure

As per pineapple things thanks for the head up.I just dey learn new things this past week.We had a women conference in Church on saturday and i found out my pastor's wife patronises Ann Summers .I almost convulsed cos i could not picture her in that mode if ya know what i mean .The topic was along the lines of spicing up marriage and gosh i really thought peeps were holy.....

Madam don dey pack small small,helping her book a cab tomorrow cos there is no way in Hell am going to Heathrow on Wednesday.

baby_123: If she was so well off, she would be shopping for he boutique in London. Besides the life of having help is overrated! What is so great about strangers running around your house all day, no privacy. And most times you are busy barricading yourself in your house out of fear that they will rob you blind if given an inch. She is an empty barrel. Being that there is nothing special about having a driver, nany, and other house staff in Nigeria. She can't also afford to do without it, in Nigeria where the basic nessesities are missing. By the way, Damiso, you've been MIA for a bit.

Sis its adult education things o .I cant even remember the last time i watched tv.Good for me though i was beggining to get addicted to NL and some tv programmes.I will be popping in more now,mumsi arrives next week so i get a 3 week breather.Yay.

She actually used to shop for her boutique in the Uk but she says profit margin is higher in Turkey .I know what you mean we grew with loads of help and its not like my family was rich
I think its just that middle class orientation in Nigeria for some people that you cant raise kids without domestic help.I know people here in the Uk who brought in helps from Nigeria(Hubby calls it slavery esp as they sometimes barr this kids fro outside interaction so as not to be 'taught 'rubbish).Even my mum suggested she it to convince me to have a 3rd child

[quote author=naijababe]^ So are just lying on your bed now! Na real see yourself now! [/quot

Sis haba now what was i meant to say?We were chatting on whatsapp and she was like am meant to be in London next week but my friend i stay with is in Naija(now am thinking friend gave bobo ) do you know price range of hotels in the central london area?She is my cousin now and it was just for 7 days.We used to hang out alot in Naija so i thought no problem its not like its a long visit and its just her.I no be typical britico like hubby now.

coogar: if life is so good for her, she should be at waldorf astoria or ritz paying £400 per night! i don't even bother myself with people like that. once they start puffing their chests, i punish them. you want to prove you have money, follow me to selfridges then and buy that £70,000 laptop.

Coogar you and my hubby are so wicked.He said the same thing that next time he is sure Claridges are not closed for business.Or even Premier Inn
Though she said she was going to stay in a hotel cos her friend she normally stays with is in Nigeria.I was like haba you can stay with me now its just for 7 days.Hubby was like see yourself now you and your always volunteering to help.If it was him,he would have given her hotels.com. or last minute.com.website to check out.

Hi people hope everyone is well and good.This post might come across as a bit of a rant and i agree it is cos i just needed to vent.

I have this house guest from Nigeria,she is a distant cousin and is stopping by in London on her to way to Turkey to shop for business as she owns a boutique in Lagos.She is a nice person but my grouse is her constant comparison to her'perfect' life in Lagos.Sheesh she is really begginning to get on my nerves.Hubby is not really as diplomatic as i am and yesterday they got into an argument on whether having an underage housegirl is slavery or not(pls am not having that argument abegi its been overflogged on NL ).

I normally love having houseguests but she is begginning to irritate me.Lil snide comments like,

"Gosh you are trying o coping with two under fives and no househelp".

"See if it was in Lagos you will get someone to go pick that up for you"

"Gosh this train wahala in this your london,in Lagos my driver takes me everywhere"

"I cant remember when last i parked"

"Do you and O have a life like this,seems you guys just live for this kids"

"God i really pity you this UK peeps"

"I have a nanny,housegirl,driver,washman and am still stressed how are you doing it?"

" This DIY life kills marriage"

"Cant you get a Nanny.I cant imagine having to deal with my kids all on my own or my hubby washing plates or changing diapers"

My hubby sometimes answers i have to help.cos child slavery is not allowed here .She is my cousin and i am begging hubby to pls censor his tongue cos its not nice to make your guests feel.unwelcome.BUT she is beggining to annoy me.Hubby is even more irritated cos he knows her hubby is a political appointee to a governor.I am.not complaining about my life and i have learnt to multitask(i wont lie sometimes i wish i had domestic help)But must she rub it in

And thats even me that i dont mind paying for peace of mind.I buy my groceries online £5 is so worth the hassle of pushing trolleys round tesco.We take our shirts to the laundry cos me and hubby both hate ironing.Its not like i am stressed but this girl just likes making unnecessary comparisons.Also sooo unhelpful.I dont mind cleaning.but abeg i have two lil kids i dont need to be cleaning up .after an adult when i dont even clean up like that after my husband.I get you dont wash plates at home but is a mug and plate you ate toast in too much to wash?Gosh

She leaves on wednesday cant wait cos na me dey beg hubby to watch his tongue

Rant over.

naijababe: I am dulling mehn . Gotta give this a try

Sis am currently paying £26 with movies.I shakarad one guy that i was leaving cos they charged me £65 for an engineer who only came round to tell me that it was the tree in front of my house that was disturbing my service.I got my 65 quid back plus £10 M and S voucher plus free movies for 6 months.If crying does not work say the magic word,trading standard or watchdog or that you are leaving

badesco: Is it compulsory you stay put in that useless country, anyway you have a choice. you can either stay and continue to whalop in penury or return to Naija and live big.wish u luck.

So all 170 million Nigerians live big?

So we plenty wey tv license dey vex.Its the most annoying bill ever .Its just that my husband likes doing good boy if not the naija in me would not pay it(he pays it so whatever)Like when do i watch BBC even my kids prefer disney and nick jr to CBeebies.

It remains Air we for dey pay for.Every letter is increase in something,sky,orange,british gas and pay freeze for most ppl.As much as i cant stand George Osborne and David Cameron,the squeeze cannot be escaped though.Its just like most capitalist societies the stupid 'we are all in this together' rhetoric applies to just poor and middle income earners.

In all i sha thank God we can afford to pay those bills.Abi wherever u are be it Naija u pay bills one way or the other so the koko is can you afford to pay them?That said the Uk is becoming increasingly too high in cost of living.

Naija i look to thee