₦airaland Forum

[quote author=~Killz~]Ok!
Queensmith. With all due respect ma'am, where should i grab?

[/quote]Last I checked we are stuck in a Ngerian Ariways (Air Nigeria) flight and its just the two of us. Where you wan see am to grab? Even me wey dey with am here I never get clearance to approach her runway without guaranteed crashing.

[quote author=Mynd_44]Where is their ticking office? Ikoyi cemetery?[/quote]Ask Queen. Ask her gently, she is touchy on issues like these.

Seriously thinking of what to do to get Queen to talk. She just dey there dey refresh this page, fighting the urge to talk. It wont work o.

[quote author=Mynd_44]How did you go? By flight?[/quote]By ticket noni.

queensmith: OMG! im gone!

Nigeria Airways (Air Nigeria) take off this early? Don't go naw, chei!


Mynd, no dey disturb this babe. The next time I have to tell you this na with gun.

queensmith: its not your fault.

Thanks for seeing things clearly, its not my fault. Its these people with dirty minds

queensmith: also if that was meant to be innuendo i soo do not get it

Nitendo nko?

[quote author=Mynd_44]Nah lie you would rather have her at 18,000 feet inside a Nigerian Airways plane[/quote]Please stop reading my mynd and posting it in public. Just cuz you can read mynds don't mean you should spoil market. Ok now she knows I want her up there, just the two of us... stuck landing gears and enough fuel to hover round on autopilot for about 5 hours. Now this will never happen cuz you don tell am.

queensmith: om dear lawd almighty. i CANNOT this early morning, It CANNOT be done. i will not even attempt it, think what you like

Go easy on my plane, will ya! Haba, you want to wound it?
I never land you don dey set nail to chook the tyre.


You for breakfast sounds like I may have to call it quits on my fasting. I knew fasting wasn't a good idea at all. Did I hear you ask how i'ld love you to be served? Grilled!

No disrespect Queensmith. I'm just a web developer and I missed most of my English classes but when a person says "The Nigerian Airways Cabin crew have to be the rudest customer service team on this planet". To me this doesn't pass as if the person was talking of something that was in the past.

I don't think anyone woke up this morning angry with you (except your bobo most probably cuz you have been telling him you are on red flag. . .this is the 7th day) but just give everything a rest and let us all have a joyful 8am.

Then again, you coulda been talking about Air Nigeria. I see them as a sequel to Nigeria Airways. Econet, Zain. . . you know the drill.


Bro XY, give us another thread and I will tell you another story. The thread must hit homepage o, I don't ply my trade in these sections.

^^ This early morning you wan spoil person day. She meant Air Nigeria

Muza: Dual core,thanx for the review, i'm about changing from my HP510, had initially wanted to get a dell latitude, then later changed my mind to getting an Elitebook, but its damn expensive, though i can still squeeze to get it.
I ddnt even know probook existed until i saw a colleague wit it today, its lovely somwhat similar to the elitebook.

will a probook be reliable and durable cos i'm now thinking of getting an i5 of it.
pls advise.

Bro I have used all kinds of machines and I can tell you I have never been as totally satisfied with my machine as I was with the Probook 4510s. I know I will be more than satisfied with the Probook 4530s I have upgraded to.

You should give it a try. Just keep it clean always.

Captain DC: Good evening ladies, hello boys, This is your captain speaking and hope you enjoyed the flight? Just to inform you, we bagan descent some 10 minutes ago. Beautiful plane ey? I likey too. Weather is quite cold and I strongly recommend you take that into consideration before planning to sleep alone. We have very hospitable airhosteses.

Bro XY (thinking): Ahh thank god we don dey reach!

Air hostess waka pass

Bro XY (thinking): Meeeeehn! Are those real? Chei!

Air hostess with all her experience, walks into that their curtained shrine and opens the "paper box" and pulls out one of the hundreds of already made "contact cards" and gives it to Bro XY

Bro XY (thinking): Chineke! where is my iPadt?!?! Ye! I can't use it now ooooooo kai! I must put this on Nairaland.

Captain DC: Good evening ladies, hello the rest of you. Ladies, we just touched down MMA and you are free to exit nice and slow. On behalf of my crew I am captain DC and this happens to be our last flight for tonight and we will be in the pilot's lounge. We hope you ladies get the message. Always fly AirDC, we never crash. . . hangs off the public address system . . . cuz this is our first flight!

The End.

Air hostess spent the whole night with one alhaji. She also called MTN customer care and left the fone at that automated message tht keeps replaying.

Bro XY called the number and it was "Number busy" all night, till the this morning.

Captain DC took a lot of planes to cloud 9 later that night. He hasn't come back, we hope he knows those planes dont land on empty runways.

This in my opinion, is not "photoshoped". Funny, we are too quick to blame every scandalous photograph on Photoshop.

I came up with "ngwebhosts.com" last year but have never been free to develop the idea. The forum boards make it quite clear what the forum is meant to be used for.

What I need: A co-admin
Your job: The forum is new so you should be able to full traffic to it, not blind traffic but people who are interested in webhosting info in Nigerian. You should also pull webhosting firms in Nigeria to let their brands known there.
Your pay: That will be discussed in private.

I am quite busy (and I don't see that changing soon) so I'll need the admin to be fully into this. The rewards are quite interesting.

If you're interested just drop your chat ID (gtalk, skype, yahoo messenger) here. If you don't have any of those, dont bother.

Well, its surprising how people will try to bring a business down but let me make things clear.

At no time was any of the servers of TruDigits ever compromised to the point of losing or wiping all server data. Sometime in 2010 there was a massive attack on one of the servers and it took out all the homepage file (that is the index.php or index.html etc) well we recovered as many accounts as we could and the accounts whose index file we couldnt recover we simply told them all to re-upload their index file and that solved it.

This happened in 2010 and we have learned a lot. From that single attack we changed the following:
1. We no longer use cPanel backups. We have written our own script to handle incremental backups monthly, weekly and nightly.
2. We have a strong combination of malware detectors and firewalls running on all servers (you can find out from the security expert slyr0x)
3. We make clients aware of the need to update their CMS sites as the attack in question was caused by an outdated Joomla site.

Every client of TruDigits is a happy client because I have personally sacrificed my social life and family to stay online 25 hours a day so please don't come here to rubbish a business I have invested my blood into for 4 years, chipmunkey.

Thanks all the same, can't say much more to you.

I am proud of what I am doing and will continue to do with TruDigits and if anyone has a problem with that don't even sign up for any web hosting plans on it.

Seun: We cannot revert to the old forum. It uses a completely different database, which is incompatible with the version we switched to. It's technically very hard to do and it would result in an inferior mobile experience. Our only option is to continue to keep tweaking this one until it looks right.

Read this (the link below) over and over again and then come back and see if you made any sense with the above statement or with your non-backward compatible "upgrade".

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Systems_development_life-cycle

Guys, accept this crap or get out abeg. I am tired of the noise. Same people making same noise.

Yes, we know! This project falls below "Version 1" of any web application developed in 2011/2012. If it was anything to go buy, the "programmers" that did it woulda been paraded on a thread on the homepage.

If you have no faith in it just get out and come back later and see if its better, if its not. . . give seun 400 USD to purchase vBulletin.

Guys just stop the noise abeg, everywhere na the same noise.

And someone was seriously arguing somewhere that seun was a programmer, I wasted 30 seconds of my life answering the guy when we coulda just waited for the ultimate answer right here.

Oya no more noise, anybody wey make noise again I ban am. . . I'm serious, this is a fertile ground for my shells and scripts and I will ban you if you worry seun again!

[quote author=Missy_B]Why can't I find the 200+ messages in my inbox and outbox? Some of them are important to me, please. Can I have 'em back.
#OccupyNairaland **Waves the old nairaland flag** [/quote]You! Don't reply please
I no know why I to dey love babes wey no get heart.

Day 1 and we are already having serious problems with load. If the poor graphics don't chase people away the fact that they have to wait longer for pages to load will. This cant be just my connection. I loaded 3 other (uncached) sites in the time I was waiting for this page to load.

Enjoy.

The probook has a higher processor type.
See my full review on the probook 4530s in the link below:
https://www.nairaland.com/890453/review-hp-probook-4530s

mkmyers45: Exactly what i noticed. The site launch was rushed because some links and functions are disjointed

And I am wondering what the rush was for. A custom-made forum application for the biggest forum in the biggest country in West Africa could not pass through a software development process or any quality assurance and testing before being released?

What? Did SMF give this place an ultimatum?


Accept this guys or just move on with your lives. If you have stayed here long enough you should know this is a one-man thing and even Ngozi Okonjomukina has no say in this.

Where is Mukina sef? My sweet wife wey run lemme.

I could join if you still need people. I'm a freelancer so just give me the team's name and I'll send a join request to it.

Relax guys, this is a work in progress. Get ready to report lots of (disgraceful) bugs.

I'll start:

Log out of Nairaland and then view this link below as a guest:
https://www.nairaland.com/login

The page presented before you is a login form where you are expected to place your username and password.
Now don't put any username and password and hit the Login button.

What do you get?

A blank page with the word "wrong password".

Was this site someone's PHP classwork?

On that same page, before you press the login button. Do you notice there are just 2 form fields with no labels on them? It is expected that all of us should know the top if for username and the bottom is for password. How intuitive!

The error handling on the entire site is classwork standard and should not be on a live site.
if(!$login_successful){
echo "wrong password";
}

Enough kids will try all sorts of injection attempts on this site as the forms are weakly or not even validated before being processed.
What's the next surprise? Our passwords are stored in clear text. It wont surprise me though.
As a web developer, I am embarrassed.

Akwasi:
Yeah. R u on board?

My brother, I don look the requirements weeks ago and its weakening and I have some web dev jobs on the same freelancer site that will keep me busy for about 2 more weeks. This thing requires people from very diverse geographical areas and mindset. . . inshort mad people that think outside the box instinctively. I just signed up weeks back but I didnt join any team. How many are in your team now?

How can I ban these guys above me?

Just wondering: OP, are you talking about the Freelancer scavenger hunt?

You can list it here: http://www.freelancer.com/marketplace/
When your stuff is bought funds will go to your account on the site. The following withdrawal method works in Nigeria:

1. Wire transfer (If you withdraw about 500 USD to your GTB dorm account, you will get about 400, after all charges)
2. Payoneer credit card, which will be sent (free of charge) to you when you apply for it from the site.

The payoneer card has a smaller charge of about 5 usd per withdrawal to it. You can use the card online or at ATMs that accept the non-chip ATM cards.

viperman:
Hi Dualcore,

kindly SMS me asap, we need to talk on that application you are writing.
08068097693

Will do.

pc guru:
dualcore was hoping to get ypur email or yahoo id wanna ask you a question, thanks and take care

GTalk: sawyerrken Availability: (24/7)
Skype: sawyerrken (24/5)

Yahoo ID: k_frill . . . but I am never online for long. If you dont use gtalk or skype and you mail me (sawyerrken.at.gmail.com) with your yahoo ID I could come online on yahoo (I am online on yahoo now tho).

You did not test this thing and I dont see any changes from the first time you posted this.

I goto a page that should have at least one listing (Phones/Gadgets (1)) and I get:

This is somewhat embarrassing, isn’t it?

It seems we can’t find what you’re looking for. Perhaps searching, or one of the links below, can help.

Your concept is very good but the implementation is nowhere near the concept. If you don't sit up on this concept its only a matter of weeks before someone comes up with something better.

So, after waiting for a few hours and no one could find my board: https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-887755.0.html#msg10343405
. . . ok lets back up a bit. Until last week I used a HP ProBook 4510s. I normally use a line of HP models and upgrade one level at a time once a year. I like the Probook line because of its keypad (which is just perfect for what i do with it: write codes) and its no-nonsense, no-girly-curvy-straight-to-business look.

Well the ProBook 4510s. . . I was totally satisfied with the core2duo (4GB ram) raw power. . . but it was the first week in March and it had just clocked its 1 year and had to be sold but erm. .  . Well I did something and fried the board (don't ask). That's the board I am looking for in the link I posted above.

Now my review for the HP Probook 4530s. I will be reviewing this in comparison with the probook 4510s that I just left.

Its battery life is good, 4 hours and some minutes. Same with the 4510s/

Keypad is very awesome like the 4510s but I have a big problem with the Up and Down directional keys that have both been sliced into half to take the space of 1 key. Talk about saving plastic. It will take some getting used to.

Still, the keypad. . . it has no num-lock indicator light. Relax, they forgot. The indicator was there in the 4510s. I love the dedicated keypad for number crunching.

Still, the keypad. . . you know in most keypads the functions keys F1 (see me wanting to press F1 key to type F1) to F12 are grouped into about 3 batches. . .
You have F1 to F4 in one batch, then a wider gap and you have F5 to F8 in the next batch. Well this 4530s people have disbanded the batches. Now everything is in one straight row. You may be wondering how I could be bringing be this up as a problem when I am not like your pregnant wife . Well this is a problem because as a web developer I refresh my browser always when I have to see the output of something I have just coded (I dont use a GUI IDE, I work with notepad++). So refreshing is almost a reflex action and we all know we refresh a browser page with F5. . . it's not easy to just press the function keys with reflex and hit the F5 key when there are no gaps between batches or any notches on the keys to use as reference. . . I dont know if am making sense to you about this. . . make we leave the matter joor. But this is a problem


I love the aluminum feel of the 4530s as compared to the 4510s' plastic. The Aluminum finishing makes it feel very solid, and it just means less finger prints on the body of the laptop.

The 4530s has a matte LCD and its not glossy like the 4510s. So this means finger prints dont really leave marks on the screen. I used to clean my 4510s every morning. . . i hate dusty, finger printy machines. So with the 4530s, its less cleaning required.

Erhm. . . what else?

Ehen the finger print kini on the 4530s. . . really I am not particular about this. . . what happens if i get injured on that finger so no login until the wound heals? . . . I kid, i just dont need that finger print scanner, I am not writing any biometric applications now and I think i love typing passwords.


The WiFi switch is in a better place this time and its a button unlike the 4510s which is a slide kini . . . that thing was always hard for me to slide without fingernails . . . i bite my nails wella.

ehen I almost forgot. . . I just love the fact that now in the 4530s we do not need to unscrew the keypad and slide out the surface just to get to the RAM and Harddrive just as I had to do in the 4510s. You just slide out the panel behind. . . still no visible screws. Lovely!

I cant comment on the graphics, I don't play games.

The Wifi strength is quite weak. I could forget my "hotspot" (dont ask) in the car and still be able to work in my room with the 4510s. I cant do that now with the 4530s. Pains me a bit cuz i cld be too lazy to go and get the "hotspot".



Overall this machine is just in its own class. . . most probooks are and refer to mine mostly as "my probook" not "my laptop".

The humble spec of my probook:
500GB HDD with very good speed.
4GB ram upgradeable to 8GB
4 USB ports (1 is usb 3.0)
Intel Core i3, 2.10 GHz
And the rest that come. . . you don't expect me to start mentioning webcam, mic e.t.c 


Get a Probook today!
Other probookers please drop your experiences here.

vanstanzy:
[color=Black]@Dual Core
But of course we can hold somewhere else. WE CAN HOLD 'EM ACCOUNTABLE! [/color]

Ahh, much better. I feel some relief now.

cowgurl:
Mehn, Wit all these side attractions, am rili lukin 4ward 2 occupyin a seat ova der soonest cos obviously our cryin, wailin n insults yield absolutely no  results.

You want to milk us? I'm game, i'm sooooo Nigerian right now. . . milk us. . . start with me.