The Igbos in APC should support the Yoruba presidency now so when power returns to the south 2039 they would be supported by the Yoruba’s.

2023 is a game of influence, would the APC survive if Tinubu leaves with his SW governors? Less likely, would they survive if Okorocha leaves? Most likely.

Tinubu would approach the south south for their support and if he wins, by 2039 he will return the favour while Igbos keep lamenting it’s our turn.

Ask yourself why no Yoruba man contested in the 2015 APC primaries. Now that’s a bargaining tool for the Yoruba’s in the APC in the 2023 election. We supported you, you owe us.

I’m not a fan of Tinubu but from all indications the APC ticket is his.

How did you observe this? You go around asking men for sex?

If your girlfriend isn't sleeping with him already, it is because he doesn't want to sleep with her. Your gf definitely likes the guy. She could have sent this message to the guy privately, posting it without blocking you first also shows she has no respect for you, she doesn't mind losing you, especially as you previously complained to her about their friendship.

Your girlfriend knows you won't leave, she wields the power in your relationship, don't confront her about the message, just walk away. If you confront her, she will most likely dump you anyway. There is a feeling of self respect you get when you do the walking away, it shows strength and decisiveness. All the best on perhaps your first heartbreak, many more to come. Cheers son.

If she's demanding for it then it's not a gift lol, it's feeding her entitlement mentality. The guy nacking her, who will most likely not buy anything for her will lick the chocolate you buy for her off her nipples later at night.

I hope you advised her to be sending FFK something monthly for child support? She should not be a deadbeat mom.

Brand new relationships be like

Opeyemiextra:

I'm glad when I see comments like this. As long as it's possible that marriage should work, I have made up my mind and working it that mine would work and that should be the mindset. I see beautiful homes around me and it gives me hope. Are there bad ones? Of course, yes but that only encourages to work towards mine.

While this is very sweet and positive, you can’t speak in absolutes when dealing with other people. A marriage doesn’t necessarily have to be bad for people to want a divorce.

You can play your part in making your marriage work, can you play your partners part too? You can vow not to cheat, can you vow for your partner? You can choose to overlook his cheating, what if he wants to be with the person he’s cheating with?

It’s best to do your best but prepare for the worst, so if (and a very big if) the worst happens, you won’t be caught unawares.

While there are good marriages everywhere, missing someone isn’t an indication of a good marriage. Couples can hate themselves and still feel the absence of their partners.

The same reason people find it difficult to break bad habits, it becomes part of your identity that you don’t feel like you anymore if you stop doing it. People fight the entire duration of their relationships and still miss their partners when they breakup. Heck, if they never did anything fun together at all, they will miss not having someone to fight with.

Men in particular struggle to cope with change, the same reason most men take long to decide if they want to get married and take longer to decide if they want a divorce from a bad marriage.

A man can live in a one bedroom apartment all his life, drive one car for 25 years and be comfortable with it until a woman shows up in his life. First she wants to change his furniture arrangement, then upgrade to a bigger house, then a bigger one. Women are catalysts for change, good changes or bad changes, a woman never remains the same for long.

This is why many ladies feel trapped in marriages, you think you want to be married but you still want to live a kind of life that isn't accessible to the average married woman. I think women should get married in their mid forties after they get tired of the party lifestyle. Men should get married in their mid eighties, so they can suffer small and die. Her ex husband divorced her because she left their baby at home to party all night.

Wizkid is just like me, we prefer our women grown.

1) Anybody who knows how to turn #5,000 to #200m in 3 years won’t be on nairaland trying to sell it to people.

2) Any investment that guarantees a stable return isn’t taking risk factors into consideration. There can’t be rewards without risk. Therefore fake.

It smells like a Ponzi scheme or outright scam to me. To be forewarned is to be forearmed.

You saw someone dragging her ex all over social media, your sense didn't tell you such woman had no shame? she probably heaped all the blames on her ex and you swallowed it hook, line and sinker. You thought you could change her as the messiah that you are. Take your L in peace orobo.

Why would he even allow her make a video? I bet nobody will call the girl a kiss and tell, immature girl now. She must have tried to blackmail him before leaking the video. MOG in the potopoto.

It is not her fault. Ladies should take some responsibilities for protecting themselves against rape though. If I go to computer village to get a phone and someone sells a bar soap to me in the guise of a phone, is it my fault? No it isn’t but would I want to lose my money so I can find fault in the person who sold me the bar soap? It is my responsibility to guide my pocket, to not speak to street boys trying to sell me a phone, to go straight to a phone shop to make my purchase, by so doing I reduce the risk of been sold a bar soap by at least 80%.

Except you are going to a party with your partner, you shouldn’t dress this way. Also do not get drunk, take basic precautions to reduce your chances of been raped because even if the rapist goes to jail, you can’t be unraped.

greenie77:


Do your nieces and nephews also have to turn 21 before they can access the provisions you made for them, without your brother's wife or sister's husband acting as an intermediary?

Most definitely. This will give the fund time to compound and make sure the beneficiaries of the fund are the actual beneficiaries.

Vinnie2000:


From Exactly where did You guys get this Info that Tobi used and dumped Alex?

Do u guys have Picx or anything to prove this?

because None of dem has EVER said they dated!

U Guys probably swallow the Big Lies of hungry bloggers and digest it!

When they had their reunion, Cee C said Alex and Tobi had sex. Apparently she heard from Nina, who heard from Miracle who was Tobi’s best friend. Alex started crying on live TV, she never denied it.

I won’t call it use and dump though, it’s just besties doing what besties do.

Munzy14:

You are not nice..

You busted his bubbles.

The child’s name is Abdulmalik, that was a very easy spot. I guess he was rushing to comment.

The gentleman has not said he doesn’t want to leave anything to his wife, he just doesn’t want her to have everything.

Most women do not include their husbands in their wills, it’s about time men start thinking with their heads. Set up a trust fund for your kids, when they turn 21 they can access the fund without your wife acting as an intermediary.

No one knows the time of his death, there’s no guarantee you will outlive your parents, make provision for them in your will, you can always edit the content of your will as changes occur. Make provision for your nieces and nephews, siblings and even friends who you find worthy.

Leave something for your wife if you think she’s deserving. That’s totally dependent on the kind of person she is. it’s not an obligation and you absolutely do not owe it to her.

SankaraSo:



Married in August
Child born in December


And a Pastor wedded them?

Nigerian churches are really performing miracles with women's virginity.

Since when did pastors start wedding muslims?

michlins:


Sign alimony before marriage or marry a wealthy woman. At least your own sweat wouldn't be what will be shared but hers too.

You’ve mentioned ‘alimony’ in multiple comments on this topic, I just found it thoughtful to correct you. Alimony is a financial support to ones partner in the event of a divorce aka spousal support.

I think you meant ‘sign a prenuptial agreement aka prenup. However, a Judge can determine a prenup to be unfair to a partner and as such prenups can be broken.

From the OP, the couple involved are based in Nigeria, in case the marriage ends, except the woman has proof that she contributed towards the cost of the building, she won’t get half or anything at all. Since there are no children involved he would not be mandated to pay a dime, especially since she’s the one filing for the divorce.

Women always blaming men for making them cheat. It is never, i found someone else attractive to them, it always have to be about something their husband did or didn't do. Once a woman suddenly start complaining about you or finding faults in the things you do, she's cheating or she's about to cheat. She just want the cheating to be your fault.

The guy who got his heart broken by a corps member and went home to cry to his wife will not make heaven. Poor wife.

GetMeRight:


You meant her hatred for him? She should stop disturbing their lives, the girl don marry. She should let her be. Who likes in-laws interfering in her or his marriage?

What would be your advise to this man if he tells you his wife and his mom never gets along and his wife does not want him to talk to her again? Be honest.

bummyla:


I dont think you are married Sir! Am in the same situation with him! Some Aunties and Big sisters do not know when to let go! They are manipulative

Hmmm I’m not married sir! but what would you do about a manipulative aunt? Especially when your partner doesn’t see the manipulation? Would you force her to see things from your perspective? I like people to make their own mistakes, that’s how people learn best.

uyimen:


Thanks for your view. this is exactly my wife view on the issue. But what am seeking advice for is not saving me from her Aunty, but how saving her from her Aunty.
She has accused my wife for taking the shine off her children, ie taking their destiny, what mother will say that?
What i dont understand should i allow it simply becos she stayed there of 18yrs. 18yrs of serving her and her children. Dont even want to talk about that.
Worst of all my wife relationship wit her biological mum who i term the best mother inlaw ever!!! is near zero, out of fear how the Aunty wont take it.

I love ur contribution but is not the case here.

Understandable, but your wife is an adult capable of making her own decisions. You can’t save someone who doesn’t want to be saved. You are already fighting over the woman’s matter, meaning her prophecies about your marriage are gradually coming to pass.

Get closer to her real mother, invite her over, visit her often, call her, send her money etc just leave your wife to the aunty, one day her eyes will clear but that’s not really something within your control, except you want to take people’s advice here and end your marriage.

As long as your wife isn’t forcing you to have a relationship with the woman, just ignore them. Atleast that’s what I would if I were in your shoes.

I know you and your wife’s aunty do not like yourselves, and you are allowing it affect your relationship with your wife. Your wife lived with her for 18 years, she practically raised your wife and can be referred to as your mother in law.

Treat her with respect as you would treat your own mother or let your hatred for her remain your hatred for her, stop forcing your wife to have issues with her, don’t put her in that position where she has to choose between her ‘mother’ and you, it’s unfair to her.

Hathor5:


bold
Something tells me that you will be a great father, loving and loved dearly.

blue
In many countries governments encourage fathers to look after their children temporarily. While the mother stays at home after delivery for 6-12 months, the father can stay with the kids for some months afterwards. Or if the mother is not breastfeeding, he can take over few weeks after delivery.

I love fathers to be more involved.

Bold
Lol thanks, I do hope to be a good father someday.

Blue
Yes some countries have 5 weeks paternity leave with benefits. Both parents must do everything they can to be involved in their kids lives, especially during their developmental years.

When you disclose your income to people, they tend to develop unhealthy expectations as to what you should or shouldn’t do with the money.

As long as my wife plays her part to the financing of the home, I wouldn’t care to know what she earns because I won’t disclose mine to her. Besides if you know what your wife does, you can have a reasonable estimate of what she makes.

It would be a privilege to retire early and be a stay home dad aka househusband. I would really love to be very active in the life of my kids. Drop and pick them from school, take them to their games, have a hot plate await them when they return from school etc.

I won’t want to be a househusband without money though because women do not treat kindly men without money. I think we will see more men willing to be househusbands when more women are willing to provide for their families without a grudge.

To get the average woman to contribute 50% for the upkeep of their families is still a tug of war talk less of being the sole provider. If a woman has to solely provide for her home she doesn’t need the man and she will show him clearly in words and in deeds.

Breakups get people feeling undesirable & unwanted, so people will do everything within their power to make themselves feel wanted.

Men will chase and women will make it easy for chasers or do a few chasing of their own. It’s all for a good ego boost.

Why does everyone want to introduce the OP to someone they know? Men too don dey dig gold

Ngoziwrites, first of all unlike ladies, guys do not make plans to get married two years from the time they get married. A guy is ready when he’s ready. Once a guy is ready he can get married to someone he met two weeks ago. We don’t plan our lives like women, we are more spontaneous, on the spot kind of humans.

The guy has told you on more than one occasion what he thinks about marriage, you said you acted like you didn’t hear. From the way you comment to people who try to advise you, it seems you only like to hear what you want to hear.

Your relationship is a distance one and still very new, you do not know this guy that well to be thinking of settling with him. You probably never seen him mad? You don’t know his level of hygiene, you don’t know if he does house chores, how he relates with his family etc. You are seeing him for the second time next week.

Do not jump the gun, make effort to advance your relationship. If you work remotely, move to Lagos if you are sure of the relationship, or transfer to Lagos if possible. That way you hang out more, you get to really know him. All these phone communication, seeing yourselves once in 4 months won’t cut it.

Lastly, from your initial post you said he asked you out when you were together, meaning you travelled to meet a guy (not your boyfriend) in a hotel. If he hadn’t asked you out, you would have been there for casual sex. He probably still sees you as a casual lay, fwb. The foundation of your relationship is faulty. Even to the 90th century, guys would still be particular about the morals of the person they intend to settle with.

I think you should do one of these two things; let go of the relationship and do better when you meet someone else or enjoy the present, let go of any thoughts of something serious coming out of this. If it happens, it happens.

All the best.

It’s so cute how girls like to feign ignorance. Would the guy have approached you to tell you about the job if you were a guy? Would you have been talking to him about apps if he was a dirty looking, bulging eyes guy? Would you not have respectfully discarded him?

The so called innocent discussion with another guy is making you fight with your boyfriend. The fight would be a very good excuse to get close to the work husband. Soon conversations with the other guy would increase, then he would invite you out and since he’s just a friend there’s no harm, then he will invite you to his place and well he’s just a friend. Then you see how cool his crib is and before you know pata has shifted.

You think your guy is childish and insecure? You will soon see how grown and secure he is once he develops the mindset that all girls belong to the street. When he dates you for 7years without putting a ring on it, you start calling him wicked. Just know these seemingly little feelings of distrust piles up in a man’s subconscious bit by bit.

pocohantas:


Lmao. How does that work?

Cheating o. People are enjoying the stability marriage brings and the excitement that being single brings.

Klass99:
This story reminds me of what Megareal (a nairaland user) said about marriage, on a different thread the 14th day of April 2021. I will never forget what she said because I thought it was profound! The full text is below, for those who don't mind kindly share your thoughts as a married woman.



See more of what she said below........

This makes sense. People decide to get married based on the circumstances of their lives at that point. A change in circumstances can quickly lead to regrets.

A person marries the best person for them and then meet someone seemingly better after the wedding or a person marries a healthy person and their partner becomes terminally ill, or employed husband becomes unemployed.

Then there are people who escape the trap but are looking to get back into another trap. Like someone else said it’s human insatiable nature, wanting to have it all. Many married people today have devised the perfect means to be married and single at the same time.