₦airaland Forum

Chaiiiii …. See as red flags full everywhere

There is no free lunch anywhere… not even in Freetown. Focus on your studies and look for hustle(s) around your campus. Better to be safe than sorry !

Don’t say you were not warned o… pity your parents, if something bad happens to you, how do you think they will cope? Pharmacy is a good course, it’s only a matter of time everywhere go stew, if you focus and do it well!!!

Not up to 3 weeks relationship and you’re already her “Ademi” … That title doesn’t come cheap you know

lexxwiz:
I have a close friend who’s separated from his wife. I’ve been trying to understand how he feels. Happy or sad? I’ve tried asking him but he’s not very convincing.

So here’s my question to people in the bracket, how does it really feel being divorced or separated? The freedom you craved so much, is it worth it las las?

Just share your own experience.


Ps: I’ve also noticed that whenever I talk about my family, he just feels very uneasy. Lol and he’s supposedly happier now.

I smell envy! I hope your friend does too so he can keep you at arm’s length.

You don’t seem like a good friend. Your “close” friend should be wary of you.

Your best revenge is to IGNORE him… E go pain am!
He won’t expect you to do that.

Listen to your mum and be the bigger person. Use this experience as a springboard to success. Channel that energy into becoming successful.

Fear women? This one is fear men abeg!

Na wa for you! Man waste woman time/youth yet na the woman make we fear.

The man is a wicked man! He refused to go for test until his wife was 39. A lady that married @ 26. Very wicked man!!! She should have left him a long time ago.

These are some of the “perks” of marrying a career lady . Keep on reassuring him and take things one step at a time, no need rocking the boat.

PoliteActivist:
She's a teacher and has intellectual bent, you don’t think she's better off doing content writing or editing online, instead of working with her hands?

She can do both. The goal is to be able to generate more than enough income to sustain herself. With time she can choose to focus on whichever provides her with the most income if she wants.

Learn how to make hair… twisting, braids etc. If you have a daughter use her hair to learn. Watch you tube videos to learn. Hair making is one business that will always fetch you money. You don’t need to learn how to make all styles. You can go to clients houses or they can come to you. Learn styles that doesn’t need you having a salon. Women will always do their hair. With time, you can learn how to do manicure and pedicure or even how to do make up etc. This is one sure income source if you put your mind to it.

OmugwoAunty:
I agree, that’s why I didn’t bother her at all. I didn’t ask for Omugwo.

Don’t stress. Since your aunty and mom are close, I’m sure your aunty is not surprised. It’s possible your aunty’s husband has been warning her about your mom and your aunty refused to listen that was why he sent the screenshot to your mom, hoping to create some distance between them.

I don’t think your siblings are really on your mum’s side. She seems like the troublesome kind so they’re probably just supporting her so she can let them rest… lol

Leave the house or take her back to her family house (whichever works for you) when next she starts. Let her know she can reach you when she’s ready to stop the disrespect and you will no longer tolerate such. Hopefully, the possibility of loosing you may make her sit up. You need to “act” not talk much.

Most people misbehave when they feel you don’t have options. Sometimes it’s just to test your limits, to see how far they can push you without you pushing back. Let her know you love her but you won’t trade your peace and well being for her excesses.

You can look for other corpers like you to share apartment with. After all, if your sis wasn’t in Abuja and you’re posted there, you would have found a way to survive there.

The other alternative is to endure your sis by avoiding her as much as possible since it’s just a temporary situation.

mariahAngel:
Don't totally give up on people though, but be careful not to give too much of yourself, to avoid being taken advantage of or being taken for granted.
In spite of everything, know that there are still good people.

Let me add to this:

As we relate with people, we have to make room for their shortcomings and one of the ways is by reducing exposure. So rather than cut them off totally, you can just reduce your availability. I’m suggesting this because of the kids, the sudden cut off may be too shocking for them.

kkins25:
My parents would call them Battalion

Na so 😁😂

Ginaz:
That's what I've been thinking. even the children I do drive them to go home cos they like coming to my house a lot. so it's not I'm using them as I want.

If they can assist me to run small errands what's bad? is life not give and take?

why do they feel they're entittled to me but I can't ask them to assist me buy tomatoes.

Don't we all send little kids on small errands like "buy me Maggie or salt "? we were sent errands when we were small nobody complained.

I get you… na to lock up sure pass.

Person wey get mind to send 5/6 children to person house at once, still get mind to refuse one of the kids to help you when you had a need. This shows that the relationship is one-sided. You really don’t need that kind of friendship.

People can only be friends when they have similar values and shared interests. That she was your childhood friend doesn’t mean she has to be your “adulthood” friend. People change… that’s life… no big deal!

Learn the lessons and move on.

20 friends cannot be friends for 20 years!

Red flags everywhere. Better people don advise you already. Dem no dey tell blind man say rain dey fall. Use your tongue to count your teeth.

Oluwashina72:
I'm 28 she's single mother 25years. 6 years old child.. I need someone too and since no one is showing up, she seems serious so I'm thinking of going for her.. Won't I regret it in any way? The child stays with parent..
I'm been open to her that I'm still struggling and she accepts to be my partner even if na to manage till we get better...
Gurus in the house should help op look into this and advise please thanks

You better be wise! The bolded says a lot. There are so many men out there that were told this same thing and are now struggling, and the woman who is now the wife is the main “pressure point” at home. Worse is that children are now involved in the union.

If she’s not contributing in a substantial way financially to lift you both out of poverty, you better take your time. It is better to be struggling as a single man than to be struggling as a married man with extra mouths to feed. Na manage una go use put food for table or pay rent and other bills?

I pity you… if you like no get sense.

Hahaha… na so 😂
Make we tell am wetin sup? Lol

Kenturkey048:
So your prayer na to become the wife for your marriage.

How does the wife’s family helping and supporting her translate to the husband becoming “wife” in the marriage?

Smh…

Instead of this one to be thanking his God, he is here whining on nairaland. What some people are praying for, you’re complaining about. You marry girl from rich home finish, you want turn am to pauper. God forbid bad thing!

ojobolinda:
Mogbe!.. Hah!

Thank you sir

Lol… what a response 😄
What were you expecting?

50StarGeneral:
Sorry to disturb you, Bro. I argued something with him but I will like to ask you. I told him that, no University will give him admission based on his age for a BSc course and even visa. But he said, someone told him he can still get admission and student visa (I guess an agent). How true is this pls? Thanks!

Yeah… I think he can. He should apply to as many schools as possible.

Misplaced priorities!

Probably that’s why she’s still single.

Wahala!!!

Person wey you no fit trace yet you no use condom. So if she get HIV, na so she go just dash you and disappear…

Chaiiiii… immigration no be beans o!
Person go leave mama & papa to go hustle for foreign land…

May God help everyone out there! Ire o!

Hmmm… after someone dumped you and blocked you on all platforms (big red flag), you still accepted her when she came back begging.

ednut1:
in a society where people do open marriage and swinging ( having sex with other couples. Where you wan see faithfulness. They white babes sabi nack and would do many of the things u see in porn. The major turn off for me na their mental health wahala/ unstable. Before person chook me knife

Lol @ bolded 😂

To each his own!

Offpointng:
Actually, You're right, It's a Visit Visa which she intend converting. but she also talk of people who's got a residency permit also complaining bout this Job of a thing.

I knew something was off in your story when you said:
1) she was working as a cleaner despite working in FG in naija and,

2) she was going to return in December.

If it’s really that bad… why hasn’t she returned immediately? The truth is that despite going with visit visa, she’s still trying to find a way to remain permanently.

To show you the hypocrisy of most Nigerians, she had an idea of what to expect by going with a visit visa and she is still painting the country as bad to discourage others.

Na so! 😂

Help him become rich … love him unconditionally… yen yen yen…

By the time you’re done, he will realize you’re not his spec 😂

Lobatan!!!