Farfalla's Posts

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Romance › Re: I Met This Girl In Less Than 2 Weeks. NOW THIS!!! by Farfalla(f): 8:49am On Feb 22, 2022*

IkranDragon:
How can I skip this issue of money and press on with the game, or should I just leave her?

Yes. Leave her.

You'll frustrate the hell out of each other because the both of you have expectations which neither party is willing (or able) to meet.

IkranDragon:
Please I need your candid advice, I am not so good at this games.

Relationships are not games. Stay away from them if you're still a teenager.

3 Likes

Crime › Re: Jacob Sylvester Is Missing In Ibadan (Pictures) by Farfalla(f): 2:22pm On Feb 21, 2022

See fine boy.

May his wife's worst fears not come to pass.

May Jacob Sylvester return home to his family. Amen!

1 Like

Romance › Re: A Man Who Loves You Will Never Watch You Use Android Phone” – Lady Says by Farfalla(f): 9:26pm On Feb 20, 2022

How boys are trooping into the thread to call her unprintable names and threaten her with Shiloh and menopause.

3 Likes 1 Share

Romance › Re: Why Are People With Good Hearts Always Unlucky In A Relationship by Farfalla(f): 5:31pm On Feb 20, 2022

SmartPolician:
Haunty, the person you described above is NOT a good person. Instead, he's a player with a different strategy... period.

Maybe you're right.

Romance › Re: Why Are People With Good Hearts Always Unlucky In A Relationship by Farfalla(f): 5:18pm On Feb 20, 2022

CHII2017:
That s exactly why some of us with good heart are been lied to,cheated and deceived because we don't have the heart of revenge or retailation. But I know God ll see us through and give us men that ll cherish us.

Cherish yourself first.

Cherish yourself to the point you appear selfish.

And continue cherishing yourself even after meeting and settling down with that man.

The cherishing of self should only stop when you take your last breadth.

1 Like 1 Share

Romance › Re: Why Are People With Good Hearts Always Unlucky In A Relationship by Farfalla(f): 1:33pm On Feb 20, 2022*

Beloved03:
I have had that advice for my female counterparts for years - when you are ready to settle down be sure to find a 'good' man. Because only a good man will not cheat, not shy away from commitment and responsibility, not abuse you verbally or physically.
A good man will always seek to communicate and treat you with respect.
And even when if you have to separate due to growing apart and incompatibly (sexual, religious, values etc) it will be almost amicably. You won't have to leave the relationship with scars or emotional wounds as many situation are.

Make I differ small.

It is the "good" men who leave scars and emotional wounds because they usually betray you after passing off as reliable. When women are around playboys, they guard their hearts, but almost always lose their guard when around these so-called good men. These "decent" men are not usually obsessed about living a life of excitement, so many women tend to think that they're a safer option. But that right there is the mistake they make. Ask anyone walking around with emotional scars. 90% of the time, their trauma wasn't caused by "bad" people. They were caused by people they thought they were safe with. The betrayal will usually be deeper because it came from an unexpected source - the good man. When the good man chooses to strike, you'll never see it coming. He'll snap and chew you into pieces before you even ask, "what's going on?"

"Good" men don't shy away from commitment, but that's because it's a strategy they use to earn your trust. They're the ones who dangle marriage and commitment within 3 hours of your meeting. Within 48 hours, you'll be introduced to his mother and sisters. And within 74 hours his parish priest knows you. In your head you are thinking, "wow, this man knows what he wants!". What you don't know is that, while he's pursuing a commitment with you, he's in the process of ghosting another lady who 3 months ago had been introduced to his family.

This is where I also differ with you. These "nice" men don't break up amicably. They do not have the liver to break up with anyone face-to-face. They have zero balls. Zero testicles. They cannot hold difficult conversations (not even in the boardroom). Usually they just ghost the lady by not picking her calls, not replying her messages, and expect her to "get the memo". That's where a ladies man beats them hands down.

That ladies man, that one who flirts with every girl, but refuses to settle down will never make promises, and when a situationship or entanglement with him is not working out anymore he'll break up with the lady intelligently. They never burn bridges. "Good" men do.

All things considered, whether the man is your definition of a good man or otherwise, expect the best, but prepare for the worst.

4 Likes 1 Share

Family › Re: You Adopted A Boy And Later Gave Birth To A Boy. Who Is Your First Son? by Farfalla(f): 9:28am On Feb 20, 2022

Hatesin:
"Easily said than done"

Adoption is not for you.

1 Like

Politics › Re: Wilfred Machage Is Dead! (Kenya Ambassador To Nigeria Dies At 65) by Farfalla(f): 9:15am On Feb 20, 2022

Lawmak:
THE KENYAN GOVT WAS SO FOOLISH TO ENGAGE THEMSELVES IN THAT ACT. THEY SMEARED A FUTURE RELATIONSHIP WITH A GREAT COUNTRY.

2 Likes

Politics › Re: Wilfred Machage Is Dead! (Kenya Ambassador To Nigeria Dies At 65) by Farfalla(f): 9:13am On Feb 20, 2022

Dmacqh:
You can’t fight ndi- Igbo unjustly and be okay.

It is funny how you guys reason.

People die everyday. Good people even.

3 Likes

Politics › Re: Wilfred Machage Is Dead! (Kenya Ambassador To Nigeria Dies At 65) by Farfalla(f): 9:08am On Feb 20, 2022

Obagofixxy:

You forgot to include he was the Dullard who initiated the capture of MNK but him Don go down finally, me God de fight for us ohhhh ,
Those people wey we no go drink water keep cup Don no even see water drink ....

Don't fight who God has blessed

Don't mention God while celebrating somebody's death. People die everyday. Were they also fighting who God has "blessed"?

May I never get to a level of hate that will make me celebrate somebody's death.

Sick people!

3 Likes

Celebrities › Re: Bollywood Singer Bappi Lahiri Is Dead ( Pics) by Farfalla(f): 11:39am On Feb 18, 2022

Lemmy123:
Although I stopped watching Indian movies when someone on a bike kicked a long bus and the bus started to spin to fast everyone got flung through the window and one particular girl flew up and landed on the man bike, behind him before the bus caught fire and burned down
No be una go fool on top movie.

Hehehehehehe! You dey craze! grin

Me sef I stopped watching Bollywood movies when I saw a plane being towed in the air! tongue

1 Like

Romance › Re: Why Do I Keep Attracting Lightskinned Ladies, What Should I Do? by Farfalla(f): 11:07am On Feb 18, 2022

How old are you OP?

Romance › Re: This Is A Must Watch For All You Nairaland Feminists by Farfalla(f): 10:50am On Feb 18, 2022*

NorthSerious:
Says it like there is a long queue of foreign men eager to wife you lot. You seem to be totally oblivious of how awful your characters are. No one will condone your attitudes.

Nigerian men should be the last men to speak about character. The last.

But on another note, awful character has never been be a hindrance to any woman trying to find a mate. Last time I checked, the Jezebels, the Delilahs and the Cruellas are the apex predators in the dating/marriage jungle. Men swarm towards them like migrating birds.

The more cruel, sadistic and narcissistic a woman is, the longer the queue of her (usually well-to-do) suitors. The Proverbs 31 woman gets one proposal in 5 years, and it's usually from one mediocre man with very little to offer, materially and sexually.

Contrary to popular belief, the "logical" gender do not consider a girl's character/personality. They're in fact attracted to drama. Some psychological ish about conquering and taming what seems wild and beyond their reach.

I insist. Nigerian women should look outside.

3 Likes 1 Share

Romance › Re: This Is A Must Watch For All You Nairaland Feminists by Farfalla(f): 1:31am On Feb 18, 2022*

It's about time Nigerian women started dating and marrying foreign men.

Forget about these guttersnipes. Marry out!

2 Likes

Crime › Re: Yahoo Boy Scams Oyinbo Lady, Asks Her To Sing ‘Zazuu’ To Get Her Money Back by Farfalla(f): 9:32pm On Feb 12, 2022

RexTramadol1:
Go learn from Simon Leviev how to be discreet and still live flamboyantly

That one is the father of them all. He even hired bodyguards and private jets to pass off as a billionaire's son!

Celebrities › Re: Teddy A And BamBam Are Expecting Their Second Child – A Boy (Video) by Farfalla(f): 12:28pm On Feb 11, 2022*

SultanOfPuna:
Typical Fathers behaviours, especially when they are expecting their first baby boy.

Teddy A already has a son from a previous relationship. The one he's expecting with BamBam will be his second son.

Career › Re: Have You Hawked Before? by Farfalla(f): 3:48pm On Feb 10, 2022

I've never hawked, but I admire people who hustle legitimately.

I genuinely admire hawkers.

1 Like

Romance › Re: Guys, When Many Men Are After A Lady You Are Wooing by Farfalla(f): 2:59pm On Feb 10, 2022

I'm here for the lies.

3 Likes

Celebrities › Re: Kemi Adetiba Announces Engagement To Oscar Heman-Ackah by Farfalla(f): 9:40am On Feb 10, 2022

77up:
never knw pocohantas get bad mouth like this

That was her being nice. grin

2 Likes

Celebrities › Re: Kemi Adetiba Announces Engagement To Oscar Heman-Ackah by Farfalla(f): 10:25pm On Feb 09, 2022*

pocohantas:
Now look at her fiancé, tell me which of these alfa males can measure up to him. I dare say a young girl in her 20s cannot get this guy. Where una wan take meet? For Coldstone? Wetin una go dey discuss? This is not some misdirected ancestor like Ned.

Ladies should focus on the men that matter. The men doing the marrying are not in the Romance section ranting every other day. Don’t allow these small boys that dare not put on generator before 7pm get to you.

Congrats to her…

71 Likes 5 Shares

Celebrities › Re: BBNaija's Tacha: I Am Single Because I Haven't Found A Man Richer Than Me by Farfalla(f): 10:14pm On Feb 09, 2022

cayorday89:
Your analyses are very much on point, at every stage in one's life either a man or woman, we get to meet our heart desires but circumstances and other factors beyond ones control either makes us get them for keeps or miss them only to settle for the available. Life definitely is not balanced, talking from experience.

Sure Cayorday89.

1 Like

Celebrities › Re: BBNaija's Tacha: I Am Single Because I Haven't Found A Man Richer Than Me by Farfalla(f): 11:33am On Feb 05, 2022*

franchasng:
Very few women marry their dream man. Most times their dream man or preferred man may not have the financial capacity to marry them as at when they desire to get married (age factor).

Pardon me for not quoting the whole response. You tend to write long articles, just like me.

Let me not speak so much about Nigeria, but where I come from men do not necessarily put off marriage on account of their financial capacities. Financial stability is usually encouraged but is rarely a deal breaker for a young couple who have been dating and want to take it to the next level. It's common to settle down when one of them (it can even be the girl) begins to earn. You're not expected to be Dangote before you can think of marriage, but it's expected that you're able to support your lifestyle (which is usually modest, but not a state of pauperism).

Now, incidences of men dumping their college girlfriends and marrying other ~~younger~~ girls are very common. Just like you've heard of cases where men worked hard to pay a girl's school fees, only for her to japa with somebody else.

Disappointments are common to both men and women (only that women are better at handling them, but that's a discussion for another day).

From your write-up, I can deduce two assumptions;
1. That a woman's first/college boyfriend is usually the one she finds ideal. You can't be more wrong. When girls get exposed to other men (sometimes more eligible), they're likely to no longer pedestalize that particular one they dated first. I don't know about other women's experiences, but that was mine.

2. You're assuming that a woman can only love/want one man and when she moves on to another, he's not exactly what she wants. Yes, sometimes that's the case, but many times it isn't.

The one thing I do agree with you though is that the biological clock favours men way more, and it gives them the luxury of time and a wider pool to pick from. However, that has never made them immune to the frustrations that come with the inability to find a compatible partner. There's nothing as frustrating as having an array of girls at your disposal and not meeting one you're compatible with. Water, water everywhere and not a drop to drink. I'm sure you've heard that phrase.

Well, at least we also agree that some men settled for women whom they clearly know never loved them. I don't know whether to laugh or sympathise with such men. Hehehehehe...! grin

Now we all understand where the source of 80% of Nairaland family rants come from. "My wife hates sex", "My wife has denied me sex for over a month", "My wife deletes her WhatsApp chat history", "My wife doesn't show me off on Facebook", "My wife hates kissing me", "I'm secretly doing a DNA on my children", etc etc.

When you know a woman finds you repulsive and you still go ahead to wife her, why won't we have such threads? grin

All in all, thanks for the civil discussion.

2 Likes 4 Shares

Foreign Affairs › Re: Rescue Effort To Save 5-Year-Old Boy Trapped In Well For 4 Days In Morocco(Pics) by Farfalla(f): 10:51pm On Feb 04, 2022

Explorers:
The drilling process in its final stage.

Local media Le360 says two rescuers are manually digging the final inches that separate them from the 5-year-old.

Better news. I pray he survives it. cry

1 Like

Romance › Re: Join An Erotic Whatsapp Group Drop Your Number. For Matured Minds Only by Farfalla(f): 10:12pm On Feb 04, 2022

Klass99:
Lol , chop knuckle. You are too much

2 Likes

Celebrities › Re: BBNaija's Tacha: I Am Single Because I Haven't Found A Man Richer Than Me by Farfalla(f): 6:23pm On Feb 04, 2022

franchasng:
Women in most cases dont decide who to marry and when to marry. Only few fortunate women get married to their dream man.

But most if not all financially buoyant single men decide who to marry and when to marry, this is not something to argue

Whenever I contribute to a discussion concerning issues, it's usually done from a place of my own experience and observation of other people's experiences. Not online articles from relationship "gurus".

In my observation, many people who marry each other want to be with each other for reasons best known to them. The world is not as complex as most of you make it seem. You make it sound like the men most women pick are undesirable, and the women most men pick are dream girls. The reality (around me) is different my friend. Life batters both men and women, and it sometimes favours both men and women.

Compatibility frustrations are experienced by both men and women. The fact that over 75% of the people constantly whining about relationship issues on Nairaland are men tells you a lot about who the frustrated people are in trying to navigate the world of romantic relationships.

Despite that, we see people who want to be with each other without having to be each other's "dream" men or women. The fact that a woman's dream man is Idris Elba will not stop her from falling hard for (and even marrying) a man she meets in her surroundings.

You guys should give us a break with this women-don't-marry-who-they-want nonsense. That would mean that the wives you picked wanted other men, but are stuck with you? Do your wives find you undesirable? This is an honest question by the way.

2 Likes

Celebrities › Re: BBNaija's Tacha: I Am Single Because I Haven't Found A Man Richer Than Me by Farfalla(f): 11:57am On Feb 04, 2022

Freestainworld:
Don't worry, menopause will soon knock for your door.

The usual scare tactics. grin

Scare women with Shiloh and menopause so that they can settle for what they don't desire. grin

Tacha has a daughter, so I guess menopause is the least of her worries. grin

1 Like 1 Share

Celebrities › Re: BBNaija's Tacha: I Am Single Because I Haven't Found A Man Richer Than Me by Farfalla(f): 11:49am On Feb 04, 2022*

franchasng:
On the other hand, men marry who they want while ladies marry who they can, that's if they can.

It's only on Nairaland I keep reading this. I realize it's quoted every time some men want to place an artificial high status upon themselves, or to lay the groundwork for instilling artificial fear of spinstorhood on women who appear picky. That afterall, she'll not marry who she wants anyway, she'll marry who she can, so she'd better pick who she can NOW or forever miss out. A strategy used to create artificial panic on women who actually know what they want in a man. grin

The reality is, some men marry who they want, who they really desire. While some marry who is available (who they can). Some even marry a woman they initially found to be repulsive, but later settled for her because their Girlfriend Zero ain’t coming back. Some marry the girl who got pregnant, regardless of whether or not he wanted her as a wife.

Same applies to women. There are women who actually marry the man they love/want. I know plenty wink

. Then there's the Alpha Widow who settles for any available man, but will keep fantasizing about her ideal ex even when making love to her husband. She's the one who fits your description of "women marry who they can".

In summary,
1. Some men marry who they want/love.
2. Some women marry who they want/love.
3. With the realisation that their ideal woman no longer wants them, some men settle for whoever else they can get.
4. With the realisation that the ideal man no longer wants them, some women settle for whoever else they can get.
5. The ideal situation, which isn't uncommon, would be for a man in Category 1 to marry a woman in Category 2, because they both desire each other.
6. Regardless of where couples belong in the above categories, some marriages work out well, some don't.

The path of life isn't a straight line.

4 Likes 3 Shares

Science/Technology › Re: Big Elephant Spotted In Oyo State (Photos) by Farfalla(f): 6:53pm On Feb 03, 2022*

Glad to see the elephant hasn't been converted to soup by the usual neanderthals who eat everything, from rodents to crawling reptiles.

3 Likes

Romance › Re: Join An Erotic Whatsapp Group Drop Your Number. For Matured Minds Only by Farfalla(f): 9:05am On Feb 02, 2022

sherlock229:
You call do all of these ,this is a Romance section, to do Programming or 3d Modelling Section and see all that, it's only a group . You're trying to be smart but you came out dumb as heck, Japan and Germany are literally the most perverted countries you can think of... don't even start.

I'm not in a competition of trying to appear smart. I'm just making an observation.

Yes, there's that stereotype about Japanese men having weird sexual fetishes. I'm well aware of that.

Thing is, alongside their weird perversions, these same men are known for their dexterity and efficiency. They're highly innovative, and perhaps that's why their other "shortcomings" can be forgiven.

Germans can be forgiven for whatever queer sexual perversions they possess, afterall they keep manufacturing the world's most recognised car models and are constantly engaging in medical research.

Can the same be said about these boys joining WhatsApp groups to share their girlfriends' nudes and discuss female private parts like their lives depended on it?

There's nothing as repulsive as when hypersexual behaviour is exhibited by unintelligent, myopic people. Really.

5 Likes 1 Share

Business › Re: 17-Year-Old Prosperity Olorunfemi Is Now A Millionaire (Photo) by Farfalla(f): 1:32pm On Jan 26, 2022

This one will never be a bitter misogynist.

2 Likes

Celebrities › Re: TBoss: Enemies Are Never Far Off, Pain, Tears Are Caused By Those From Within by Farfalla(f): 2:57pm On Jan 25, 2022

Klass99:
Lol .
Mwah for everything you said.

back at you!

1 Like

Celebrities › Re: TBoss: Enemies Are Never Far Off, Pain, Tears Are Caused By Those From Within by Farfalla(f): 11:13am On Jan 25, 2022

WoundedLamb:
Lol... what of when a man suddenly becomes a motivational speaker?

They don't become motivational speakers. They become redpillers and incels who spend their entire lives trolling women and monitoring who their exes date, who they marry, if they marry. Small rejection from their exes they can't take.

What T-boss is addressing is common knowledge. A very common scenario. Her statement may have been motivated by a family matter, perhaps a betrayal by a close aunt or cousin, but trust these orangutans to turn it into a woman-bashing discussion.

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