₦airaland Forum

Rich4god:
Greetings to you all...

These days, the rate of infertility is really on the high side. Most of the time, married couples find it difficult to get pregnant, they end up going to fertility clinic, taking one treatment or the other just to get pregnant. But on the other hand, people/friends having sex outside marriage, sharp sharp pregnancy done enter...

What could be the effect of this...

If you are saying married women, who can't get pregnanted by their spouse, gets pregnant easily with men out side, it's obvious the man has an issue with his sexual organ

A normal woman gets pregnant but when after trying with her spouse and nothing is working and his spouse will not accept to go for medical check up, the whole world will assume the woman is at fault especially the man's family

But a sensible ma with fertility problems, can open up with his wife because apart from drugs, you only need the full support of your wife to get it back in full gear

But hiding it away from your wife and making her a mockery before your family that she isn't pregnant yet, will frustrate her and she will be tempted to seek it out side to be very sure that she isn't the fault

Worst case scenario, you divorce her, to her it means nothing because it's better for her to have her own child than her staying with you and your family is attacking her of distroying her womb that's why she hasn't taken in

A childless woman is twice more dangerous than a normal woman

You have to confront your wife about this affair and find out what you are not getting right

You guys should understand that, if you don't master the buttons to press in your wives body, she will get it done perfectly with another man who have taking time to take her to cloud nine

Most women that cheats, are not getting satisfaction from their men and the men involved are not ready to update or upgrade their system of handling a woman

As a man, find out how best is it to make her have orgasm rather than expecting her to give you respect and the only satisfaction she is supposed to get from you is not guaranteed

Sex is meant for women not men

Have you ever seen a woman look for how to make a man happy on the bed ❓

No ❗❗❗,
men go extra miles to handle a woman so that, she won't wish to get anything less from what she knows you are capable of

To me, I will prefer a satisfying sex romance than a complete house keep allowance

I can work and provide those things but I can't Bleep myself to cloud nine,
no matter how pleasurable my fingers are the different is clear

kestolove95:
How I wish all d men in dix world will see dix?

I guess is for both sexes though more of men

Once the men allows pride to come in, it becomes an infection in them.

kingdiamond:
Let me start from the begining . My wife delivered a bouncing baby boy for me last year . Which is my second child . I already have a 4yrs old pretty daughter . During that time this certain niece of my wife always come to help us with some certain chores . So we are so close to her (friendly) . Although we have a house help . I am living in my own house (Duplex) with multiple bathroom's . But this my inlaw alway's prefare to take her bath at the open yard . Not minding that i could see her naked . After some month's we later found out that the girl is pregnant & she is in her final year in the university . Her mum and my wive pleaded to me that the girl should stay in my place till she put's to bed & when the child is about 4 to 6 month's old her mother will carry the baby . I agreed . The problem now is that , not only that she take's her bath where i could see her . She now breast feed's her baby in my presence & through the process . She is alway's half naked . And the size of her breast has trippled . And her breast milk is too plenty for her baby . At time's when we are outside she will be pressing the milk out of her breast in the presence of me & my wife . That it has filled up and that it is paining her . And she knew that i am a (Lactite) meaning that i am the type of man that like's drinking breast milk .

You are not normal

You can go ahead and suck the breast

After that sleep with her and make her pregnant

Just sit down and read what you wrote again and ask yourself, are you OK, ❓

OmoManU:
The wisest man ever liveth who happens to be king Solomon married many so who am I, a mere mortal not to.
But on a serious note, what matters most is the ability of the man to be a loving and responsible father. No matter what the mama tells the children, one day when they grow up, they'd one day sit and realized it's all lies in as far as the Dad is good to them.

Exactly, you nailed it

Enemyofpeace:
the childrens didn't did anything, they only raned because of their lives, they doesn't want to follow their father

That's it, he must have soiled his hand and the children lives may be tampared if they should attend

I don't want to blame them

tillaman:
i believe there’s something they are not letting us know!! Maybe he’s diabolical or something of some sort

My dear, for them to leave the corpse for their kins men to Bury, their is a secret and hidden issue and being a clergy the church have to Bury him for him to reach his destination

He needs salvation and deliverance, in fact, he need God's intervention in his life

One day, they will eat the off springs of marine children

tillaman:

No matter what the man did to them while he was alive, atleast he’s no longer breathing, all 4 of them can’t be So busy that none of them could come for their father’s burial, which kind carrier be that?
Something isn’t right but it’s a family thing they will settle it noni

In as much as I don't support what the children did, can't you see its a clear case of teamed agreement by his children

For all the children to team up , then it's a long thing

izzy4shizzy:
No matter what he did to them , he is still their father

No one is denying his paternity, best option is avoid problems by all means with your wife and children

OmoManU:
That's one of the reasons why a man should always behave like a man by having more than a wife. My own opinion tho

You can't handle a wife under your roof you ate clamoring for more than one

Who among your wives are you answerable too

Who among the wives will tell her children that your father cares more of the other woman than her

And you think the children will embrace their father ❓

Best option, marry one wife love her and her children will respect you till you enter grave

Joshmodest:
The children in question are adults they may have thier reasons , whether acceptable or not ...
BTW men should learn to care for thier children , gone are those days when you let your wife suffer to take care of the kids , and you tell yourself , that the children would come to look for you in the future after they are accomplished . Any body tries that with a child like me , you'll be finished , i totally would have nothing to do with you even if you come back yourself to beg ...take care of your kids , cos if you don't , there's always a repercussion you wouldn't like or expect ..
I'm not saying that's what happened in funke's case , I'm just putting this out !

You are absolutely right, men should face theirs wives and children because you stand to gain at old age before one family idiot will put the blame on their mum

That was smart of them, every one should seat up

Thegeneralqueen:
The guy is too short

Am sure the one you are dating is has no hope of engagement with you even as tall as he is

Goodplace:
Pls advice... If a person is earning 130k Monthly and having the intention of getting married soonest and paying rent of 270k/ yearly can he consider that job a good one and moreover can he get married comfortably?

The issue of getting married comfortably comes with patient and time but with such amount as income and the one your wife will support you with, you will achieve success

But look for a modest woman who will build your home with you in the most economical way, not those flashy ones that lives on dreams

E685:
My wife and I have been together for 8 years now, married for 5. I am 33 and she is 30. We now have our first child, a son who is just turning 1. He is everything to both of us. Before our son, our relationship was strong, although to be honest I’ve always been frustrated with my wife’s way of handling issues. I’m the kind of person who is very hard to get angry, I hear people out, and I talk out my issues. I listen to all sides and I think logically before emotionally. I seek therapy when I’m stuck. My wife is the opposite. She reacts with emotions first. She is very quick to be offended by anything. She will shut down and refuse to communicate until she has had time to process. I do all of the work resolving issues we have. I sometimes wonder if I ever stop taking the high road and work through our issues, if anything would ever resolve itself. So that being said, conflict management aside, we are happy. We are passionate, have similar interests, and make each other laugh.

Then there’s my mother. Where to begin. My mother, while seen as incredibly loving and generous to many people, is also a person who has been shut out of so many relationships in her life that I really just feel bad. My father and her are divorced. She has a genuine phobia of being left out - of gatherings, of relationships, of family. She is extremely smart and knows how to manipulate people into doing what she wants. She also widely seen as a “difficult” person. She is difficult in that she finds great offense to issues many people would not notice or care about. If she feels wronged, she will overwhelm the person who wronged her with incessant questions trying to make them feel her side until they cave in. In her closest relationships, her absolute need for the show of love and inclusion and validation cause the very people she is trying to reel closer in to push her away, a self fulfilling prophecy. My Mom, while I love her, is her own worst enemy.

Needless to say, these two, my wife and my mother, clash. At first they liked each other. The very first issue involved our wedding planning. My wife had a very clear plan for the guest list, and my mom asked for a number of her friends to be included on the list. My wife did not want that, got immediately upset and the situation blew out of control. My mom called me nonstop asking why my wife could be so cold, unwilling to see her side, or give in even an inch. My wife felt my Mom was making the wedding all about her, and could not believe she was called cold. She was “done”. My mom wasn’t paying for a cent of the wedding either so this was another offense. In the end I brokered a compromise, much to the dismay of both women. Each held the grudge for a long time.

Occasionally my mother would do something that my wife disliked, and my wife would be pissed at me for not standing up for her. Admittedly I had never stood up to my mother, I always took the time to listen to her side and find reason behind her otherwise inflammatory ways. My wife and mother had a falling out right before the wedding, and forced me to choose sides. I struggled as I found both of them to be at fault. I chose my wife and my mother hated it. Ever since, basically anything that my mother says or does, whether good or not, offends my wife. Even the most genuine attempts by my mother to reach out to my wife are smacked down. My wife has never made any effort to release the past resentment. Over the years my mother has attempted to take the high road, only to be barely acknowledged by my wife. I have always pleaded with my wife to at least pretend to like my mother. She did a bad job of pretending because my mother would always call me and ask why my wife appears to never care or never let go of past feelings. So both saw through each other, my mother would continue to act happy and loving, while my wife never would.

Anyway now our son came into the picture. He is amazing and being the first grandchild on both sides, the grandparents want to be around him every chance they can get. My mother visit every weekend. I told my wife we have to let her do this. My wife dreaded this. I told my mother that one of the weekends, we wanted her to visit on a Sunday (staying over till Monday morning) instead of a Saturday because we had plans that Saturday. In actuality the day was a birthday celebration for my father in law, being held at her parents house. She just didn’t want my mother involved in everything so she put her foot down. My mother wouldn’t take no for an answer and pulled it out of me what we were doing that day. Well she took great offense to the fact that she was not automatically invited, and couldn’t believe how cold, unChristian, and I loving my wife and her family were.

This stuff affects me greatly so of course I share with my wife, and she exclaims she is done with my mother. No longer wants to be nice or pretend, she is tired of how much my mother always wants it all to be her way and then throws out insulting and hurtful words about my wife to get her way. I get messages from my moms friends telling me how I need to see things my moms way, they would never exclude their mother this way, and that my wife is causing all of this.

And so here we are. I saw my mother the next day, and my wife removed herself from the situation by staying out for the day. It was incredibly uncomfortable. I told my mother how mad I was at her for always being so difficult and never just letting it go. I told her my real feelings about how I wished she could stop needing such inclusion and love. Her response was that she is justified in wanting to be included in everything, and that my wife has never shown her any love or effort and it was obvious, so what could she possibly do? I told her my wife is willing to work on this, perhaps in professional therapy. But in reality my wife wants no part of that and has no desire to mend anything anymore. I think she resents me for trying to mend things.

So what do I do? I’m frustrated with my mom for being difficult, always needing more and never letting things go, and saying inflammatory things when she doesn’t get her way. But I see that all she’s ever wanted was peace and love, and my wife never gave her that. I’m frustrated with my wife for getting so easily offended at everything my mother says or does, and I wish she could make any effort to see the other side and let go of such a grudge. My mother is definitely strong willed and manipulative but I think there is love there if only we could work through it. My wife is extremely assertive and refuses to let anyone wrong her twice. Both think the other has always been dead wrong, the entirety of the blame, and will never change. My wife is ok never seeing my mother again, yet my mother says she wants to let bygones be bygones and attempt to work through it.

What should I do? Forever stuck in the middle. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Truth be told, I don't like this kind of rainbow wahala, it puts a man in a very difficult situation

Your wife is just displaying her madness because she gets threatened because of your mum's presence, but she got it all wrong, totally wrong of her to treat your mum as a stranger

Your mum on her own side wants to be part of the family because after her separation with your dad, you are the man in her life and she wants to be closer to your family but your wife is depriving her of that which is very bad an attitude from her

Your duty now is to stand on your foot to what ought to be done or not

You have to protect the interest of your mother without fear or favour from any one

Your mum is already lonely, she doesn't need to be pushed out of your circle

Pls sit your mum down and assure her of the love and support you will give to her

Let her know that, you still remain her son and the man that will protect her intrest as long as you are existing

You need to say this to her so that her mind will be settled and she too will experience happiness knowing that you got her back

As for your wife, the more you give her chances, it will get to a stage you will be her puppet because it will be too late to handle her

Whenever they start their wahala, just watch them, make sure your wife doesn't use abusive words on your mother and make sure your mum doesn't either

But, I maintain that you have to stand for your mum, reason that you may be her only son or you are her favourite child

Worst case, your wife is free to park out if she can't accommodate you and your mother

She is taking her own too extreme and if she dare packs out from your house, thats the end for her

Am a woman but having read what you said here, I won't support her putting your mother in a situation that is already affecting your mum happiness

But if she is the bread winner of that house, then you have to keep shuttling both of them for individual peace

You can see that I didn't mention that you should report her to her patients, no ❗❗❗, no need, she must have assassinated you and your mum's character

So they will take sides with her but if you take the bull by the horn, her family will come for renegotiation that's if they wish and if they don't wish,
"to your tent ohhh Israel"

Miffia:
Hi everyone... Good Afternoon

I will keep this brief and short.. Ignore any typographical error, please.

I have this boyfriend, we've been dating for years now. The thing is, he doesn't last long during sex, he's a 2 minutes man, as you people call it. There was a time, we had sex, less than 1 minute, yes, I mean less than a minute, just 3 or 4 thrusts and he released. He was shocked, sad and disappointed, I was shocked too. I was even the one cheering him up, not to be sad, that everything will be okay, that's not his fault, he just wore his cloth and left.

This is someone I want to marry, we will soon do our introduction and wedding, and I don't want our sex life to be boring, we are not enjoying s*x at all, and I don't want to cheat on him... We love each other so much.

Please, anybody that has experienced this before, or know how to stop it should advice me on what to do, its not making me happy neither is my boyfriend happy too

Your advice will be appreciated.. Thank You.

From your analysis, he must have been coming so quick

He already knows that he has such problem, but he has never worked on it

He need medical assistant and both of you will have to go for his test and you guys will sit together and receive the text results

Let's start with thus and see if he will continue to a one minute man or improve

But that doesn't mean he can't pregnant you unless it's affecting his sperm count

Don't allow him to go for the test alone, go with him pls

We4all:
I'm someone who gets along great with kids, (especially those in my former neighborhood). There is this particular family whose kids always come around, and they have a 2 year old who happens to be one of my favourites.

When she is around with her older siblings, I play with her and she lets me hold her. In fact, we get along great! Last week, they were at my place, and her older sibling volunteered to run an errand for me. The 2 year old wanted to go with her, but I objected.

That was my undoing! As soon as the sister stepped out, the kid became furious with me, and wouldn't let me touch her. When I tried, she kept screaming that I should leave her alone. I held her hands and tried talking to her, but she wriggled out of my grip. I must confess that I was amazed at her strength, which was like a 10 year old.

Hours passed, and I thought her anger had died. I made an attempt to touch her, but she kept screaming: "Leave me alone". They eventually left and I forgot about it.

A week passed and they came by yesterday, but to my greatest shock, she was still mad at me. All my efforts to bond with her was met with a stiff resistance, and she kept saying: " Leave me alone". I asked the sister what she thinks of her behavior, and she said the kid gets angry easily at home and her anger can last for days.

That revelation didn't go down well with me, and I have been pondering what on earth would make a kid act that way? Gone are those days when kids are usually sweet and innocent. No matter how much you discipline them, they still warm up to you.

I guess a lot is going on and the change has also affected our kids. If a little kid is overly sensitive in her ways, then what should be expected of an adult?

y

She reincarnated, in her former world, she was too playful

windman:
Hello everyone,

My little cousin in her early 20's just got pregnant for a guy we don't know. She was about to purchase this year's UTME form before this ordeal.

She ran out of the home for 2days now after my Uncle threatened to deal with her (the normal Nigerian parents way). Although, she called my elder sister with the guy's phone that she's safe because her mobile phone is in the house.

My Uncle has strictly warned us not to allow her into the house because he can't live in same house with my pregnant cousin. He doesn't even wants to know her whereabouts because he is really mad at her for becoming pregnant outside wedlock.

Good people of Nigeria, please what do I do??

Get people to talk with your uncle before he loses that child

E don happen, he should take it easy

Any man that tries these with a woman, will be a moving corpse when she wants to start her own

brownsugardr:
We got married in 2018,we have an awesome baby boy.God blessed us. We have successful professional careers. We are very confortable. It started when we were dating. She hardly put out. I thought it was just because she was very religious. After we got married she finally opened up. She was assaulted when she was 10, now she finds sexual intercourse extremely painful. In fact the thought of sexual intercourse makes her sick.We sought Medical and Psychological treatment for her to no avail . In two years of marriage i have only succeeded thrice. Luckily God blessed us with our Son through C Section. She understands her duties as a wife and my needs as a man. As she can't fulfill them out of no fault of hers. She feels very guilty and tries to make it up to me. By encouraging me to get it elsewhere. The dream of every man right? Getting such a free pass.I thought so at first. I would go on a 'banging spree'. After all, it was a free pass. Until mid last year , i noticed she struggled to hold back tears each time i left the house.We got talking and she told me it kills her inside knowing i get to be with other women. She has been depressed since we got married. And she has been contemplating suicide as this is not the life she wanted. I love my wife and family so dearly. Ever since i got to know this , i feel very guilty hanging with other woman. We now try every other thing to get sexual satisfaction. Except intercourse. I can tell you, It is quite unfulfilling. Until last month, when i traveled. She packed Condoms in my traveling Bag. I saw it as another free pass. I tried hooking up with other women several times but couldn't get it up because, each time i was filled with so much guilt i ended up dressing up and leaving the place. With my wife am good to go anytime, but i cant do much with her. But with other women i lose interest as soon as i pick up a condom. We have such a complicated marriage.
Please any one with this kind of experience advice us on how to get through this because am now depressed too and i don't want to lose my wife.

By now she would have overcome that rape issue

Why is she still wallowing in it

Her matter tire me ohhh

Job hazard, rest in peace

sarrki:
https://www.thecable.ng/extra-nkem-i-got-your-back-ihediohas-wife-consoles-him-over-scourt-loss

Before nko ❓

Who would have done it

ladymachant:
Still on sale

Do you still have foot massager

BabaRamota1980:
I laughed where he said the devil made him do it.

Someone claimingvto cleanse evil is himself under guidance of evil.

This guy should be given death penalty. He should be executed. He is danger to society.

I read where he said he is an animal

He tried by not putting the blame on the devil

SaintsSamurai:
Thanks very much for your words of wisdom.

Thanks too

hazan041:
Please dear nairalanders I need your dearly advice

Am a student from a university here in Nigeria, it happens that I got 3.39 as my first gp which makes me unhappy but I didn't allow it to depress me... So the following semester I got 4.75 and now out of 8 semesters in total.. Am done with 4 now and my cgp totals 4.26 ... I have four semesters left.. Can I make it to 4.5? And what gp do I need to keep for each semester left to achieve that.... Thank you

Note: Don't talk about how grade doesn't matter in my life, am quite aware too as am not even planning to work with the degree

Be determined, you will get there if you remain focused

Code650:
Hey Guys, i just joined yes!! after so many readings. Name’s Arianna and i live in Usa.. I’m a native American and Josh is Nigerian. We have a boy and he’s 5. We both work and i always leave my kids at their grandma’s (My mom)..recently i had a closer look on my kid and i can see tiny cuts like dots on my child's back.. they look so tiny but a closer look they stand apart within that space. He’s got 12 of those tiny cuts on his back and he says papa did it.

So since this is a Nigerian forum (at least his addiction to this site made me read too) can that be voodoo? I’m gonna post a pic but no for privacy reasons.. totally i do not onow how to explain this.

Is like the both of you are not really open to each other

Anyway, I believe he did that so in future if you guys got separated, he will identify his child

Because am wondering why such thing these modern days

Where you guys really married, I mean did you family members and his family, participated in the marriage or you engaged yourself over there and assumed that you were married to each other ❓

SaintsSamurai:
I really need to know if there are repercussions.

Go to God in prayers, he is the only one that have powers over you

The fear of God is still in you that's why your conscience is tripping you

Those that have murdered their conscience have no fear in them and they end up in a pit

SaintsSamurai:
My beautiful ladies and handsome gents of nairaland.

What i am about to tell you is a true life story and i feel i should let it out because I've been worried for days now.

Well last December on the 30th, a neighbour of mine lost her husband in a ghastly car accident along Ring road in Benin city in Edo State.

Before then I've been a close friend to his wife and i was very close to the family.

It was wailings and rain of tears in my area and In all my neighborhood.

Well two days later he was buried amidst tears.

The next day, when i went to visit the widow of the dead man, it was chilling because of the heavy harmattan. It was late and lots of people that came to pay their condolences have all gone home so it was me and the widow In her room, there were just two persons in the sitting room.

Well to cut the long story short, one thing led to another and we had sex together.

Note: I'm human and she is too, so please don't blame us.

But what I'm worried is if there are spiritual repercussions for the act?
Because I'm a little bit worried.

Criticisms are welcome.

Well what you did with her may be of a little help to release tension from her

Though she didn't resist she consented to it

Men does the worst, they have their wives in the mortuary and still go ahead to bleep

For me, I will advise you ask God for forgiveness, resist the urge to do more and give her time to mourn

But you have to let her know about it so that she won't think you have gotten what you want and that's it

She is in a very painful mood and can do and u do

Assist her financially where you can during this period

As you are abstaining, you will realise if there is need to go on with her or not