₦airaland Forum

dbestcno:
One of my guys dey regret am because he rush born 6 before age 34. Now hustle no easy for am

Being 34 is not the problem. But why have six children? What made him have six children?

titusmichael27:
The problem with us human is that we always wish to be smarter than the one who made us. In fact, we are the only creation that gives God headache more than any other creation on earth. That's why there is a global failure everywhere. How many of you can stay a year without **nacking***. You're walking around doing what married people do every day yet you want God to do magic in your life. The small income that you received, she too can bring her small income and you two plan , build life together. I promise you that when you get married at 40yrs, you will wish you had married earlier. Okay, have you built castle in the air since you didn't marry early? Oh! Your life is so perfect because you didn't marry early. Look for a reasonable girl around you, from a good home. A girl with good home training and you will never regret it.

It is not like married people don't nack outside their marriages. In fact, married men cheat the most. So, marriage doesn't prevent having different sexual partners.

DanielsParker:
The same wife you caught using a vibrator and has been denying you your conjugal rights?

I had to check and na true o

MT:
When I read the bolded, I knew you have not traveled out before. You are one of those we are trying to shape their worldview.

First of all, those you mentioned (at the bolded) are not classified as "whites". Your kind is the one that will see a Chinese and be worshipping him as "white".


I will advise you to be consciously exposed to the global events and expand your perspective about life. Learn and unlearn.

While I appreciate the advice, I did not equate those other nationals to white people. I meant that if Pakistanis, Indians and Filipinos can celebrate naturalisation, there is nothing wrong with Nigerians doing the same. As for the part of being sought after by companies, that is understood.

pansophist:
Well, nothing is wrong technically, as far she consented. But, you will know if she is having sex with a commitment relationship as a goal, and a man shouldn't abuse that.

If you don't want anything serious with her, don't use her for sex. Better to even pay a prostitute than use someone that loves you for sex. I am not encouraging prostitution, but it's about the lesser evil.

With prostitute, it's pure transaction and no one is being deceived or being used, and you can sleep well at night without feeling like a demon (that's if you're not a psychopath who is incapable of empathy).

Honestly, this is the best. If more men adopt this measure, then maybe we would have fewer heart broken ladies in the society. Be upfront and clear with them that you are not interested in a relationship. So, the lady knows that if she consents to sex, it is not an avenue to be in a relationship. This is because the average man will slot preek if he sees an opening.

No be say I be saint, but I get small conscience, and I like being straightforward.

Bruno3000:
who told you? Keep deceiving yourself.

As at last year, the number of practicing Christians in the UK fell below 50%. In fact, the increase in church attendance in the UK and, to an extent, Canada is mainly due to new migrants from Africa and the Philippines. The average young to middle age white British does not attend church.

Seun:
I never felt the need to use alt accounts to stir discussions, so I never did. This is a false speculation.

My apologies, then. I withdraw the accusation.

Effectively, all the constituents of the UK except for Northern Ireland are governed by non-English/whites.

Humza Haroon Yousaf - First Minister of Scotland, who is a Pakistani
Leo Varadkar - Prime Minister of Ireland, whose dad was Indian and whose mom was Irish
Rishi Sunak - Indian heritage
Now Gething who has a Zambian, aka black heritage.

While humans are tribal, and what I listed would be hard to replicate in East Asian societies, those societies (East Asian) are wealthier. If you must be tribal, be wealthy. You cannot be practising tribalism and dwell in multidimensional poverty at the same time. Terrible combination.

MT:
Citizenship has nothing to do with crime.

Everyone is a citizen of a particular country.

It is Nigerians that see a big deal in acquiring citizenship of another country. Even the whites do not see it as a big deal.

There are many Nigerians languishing in jail in Nigeria. Also, many Brits, Americans, Canadians are in different prisons for various crimes.

Being a citizen of a western Nation does not make you a "perfect" being. We just exaggerate citizenship in this part of the world.

Why should they when the strongest passports are from white dominated countries? However, in cases where whites naturalise, they celebrate/cherish it. Such as Singapore. Indians, Pakistanis and Filipinos celebrate their naturalisation. Nothing stops Nigerians or other Africans from doing the same. It is an achievement on its own.

Ronaldoguy:
I actually thought this is a troll account until I checked ur profile and see you have been on nl since 2008, Please dont go to Haiti and u cant swim to Florida from Haiti, even Cuba that is close in central America, u cant swim not to talk of Haiti in the carribean. US coast guard, US marines are all guarding the coast and u cant even make it far due to pirates. Haiti is currently in civil turmoil about to start civil war any moment from now and it is the poorest country in the Americas. You will be better off in Nigeria.

Whenever you see such accounts, take it as one of the accounts Seun created to stir up topics. When Nairaland was young, dude most likely created hundreds of accounts which would be used to create topics aimed at stirring a discussion - thus generating web traffic.

Deeprooted:
Most of our agencies are just there for budgetary allocations and nothing else to offer.

When last did the Nigerian Export Promotion Council organise workshop to train farmers on how to package their produce for international market?

We as a country need a change of value system.

The standard Organization of Nigeria does nothing other than salaries and getting allocations!

This shows you don't keep abreast with the activities of the NEPC. The NEPC is one of the active federal parastatals and is largely administration neutral.

PotatoSalad:
Lemme guess. That 10m is your entire life savings. That's a little above $6k.
Better stay back and continue grinding it here.
If you have to ask which country to go to, omo remember that that money is peanuts and you'll only get a what i ordered vs what i got situation.
Naira don useless but that money is still good down in Naija. Continue grinding.

]

OP: This is your answer. Re-invest into whatever got you that amount. Hopefully, it is legal.

MemoriesAndMe:
He's probably still young and want to explore other nations.

My advice to OP is first travel to any country you desire to live, stay there for a moment to understand the place. Then return to Nigeria after seeing it all. Do your analysis and comparisons and make a decision.

If you like it there and can survive there based on what you have seen, then you can consider relocating. Relocating to a new country without knowing what you'd find there may turn out to be a nightmare sometimes.

Some Nigerian folks in the countries you're trying to go to will gladly return to Nigeria it they are sure of having the means to raise the amount You're willing to spend on your relocation to places they're trying to return home from.

Please, on what visa? This is assuming he would be granted the visa in the first place.

ednut1:
Awon adojuti omo. Disgrace to their lineage

I read on Instablog that the Taiwo dude moved to the UK immediately after his secondary school education. The mom has been a resident in the UK since. If someone must be greedy, why not channel it into something legit? He is probably a citizen sef.

CaveAdullam:
Well done Pansophist for such a wonderful write-up.

I
5. The problem these days is that Men are not granted their power despite their performance, hence, they tend to exhibit aversion towards marriage, long term relationship, societal upbringing, development of one's community. Men are being played and their eyes are opening to this fact. In our hunters gatherers past, men were rewarded for their performance with positions, lands, women, meats etc. These are what motivates men to work.

6. The state has deprived men of these things by siding with women while still expecting men to perform. Things doesn't work that way at all. Only the collective efforts of men (and women) can sustain civilization.

If everything in the book is not reviewed to favour men with appropriate rewards and women still enjoying their privileges, Men will continually retract themselves from what will benefit their community and society at large.

.

Na this thing make Korean men revolt. Recently, it was revealed in a survey that Sinagporean men believed "women's empowerment have gone too far". With low birth rates, competition for jobs and high cost of living, a growing number of people will remain single.

budaatum:
Let me send you my grandma's details or a former colleague's who doesn't want children so you can tell them their "value diminishes greatly" because they cannot have children any longer.

Not everyone determines a woman's value by her potential to have children, same as not every man is valued by his Benz.

Very few Nigerians and I dare say, black Africans, desire not to have children. In fact, I stretch it to be black people all over the world. In black Africa, marriage is firstly a reason to have children. Africans rarely marry for companionship. DINK (dual income, no kids) cannot work in the continent.

ednut1:
I bought cement today 8500 per bag. Where are they selling 5k abeg make i go fight my cousin 🙄

You dey build house for Nigeria?

Jman06:
If the woke southern ladies want, they can embrace marriage aparthy as practiced in the western nations, the good thing is that Nigeria is becoming predominantly Islamic. The only thing it'll cost is for more southern men to convert to Islam and they'll be able to marry as many women as possible in accordance with Islamic tenets. The future of Nigeria is really Islamic! And I'll like it to be the Afghan version of Islam where women's roles begin and end with bearing children and keeping the family.

Igbo men you mean? Yorubas can easily change to either religion if they wish to. Tunde Bakare and David Oyedepo were Muslims or came from Islamic families. Rather, I see Igbo women being married off by Muslim men, specifically Northern Muslims if the gender culture wars continue. Besides, nothing stops Igbo men from converting to Islam if they want to marry more than one wife. What is left is for Igbo women to agree to marry Northern Muslim men. The argument then would be that since we are getting older and Igbo men aren't willing to marry us, let's marry Muslims. That time would come as, unlike the West, it is not entirely feasible to be a single woman in Nigeria for the long term. Nigeria is not wealthy enough to accommodate a large number of single women or moms.

But yes, I agree that the future is Islamic, not just in Nigeria but in most parts of the world. Islam, the Arabian version, is the only ideology that has withstood Westernisation, both culturally and religiously. It is a well deserved victory.

pocohantas:
Would we be this calm if a woman expected 200k from a man abroad because she helped him in the past? I bet we would have a whole new topic on why men do not accept help from women.

I would be calm as well. If you noticed, others just bashed the lady without considering certain factors as to why the amount was sent.

Thislifee:
Just like #200,000. I helped her gained admission!

I see. Then in that case, N5K is too small. But 200K is too big, considering it is your birthday. Next year, you would expect something bigger. We should consider what she does for a living, her visa status and country she resides in. Also, how many siblings and extended family members does she have in Nigeria?

Many factors determine someone in the abroad sending money to another in Nigeria.

cococandy:
Y’all claim women are more desperate for marriage but you don’t stop nagging them about it.

I hope they can see through the ruse and dump y’all the way western and Asian women are leaving men at any sign of foolishness. Na podcast it go end for una last last.

So you can go there and keep griping about how no woman wants you & women of this generation can’t endure BS like your moms did yada yada yada. I mean it’s a wave of enlightenment and slowly but surely it will sweep over Africa as well.

ly proves himself worthy of having a wife.

The rest of you (incels) will have no choice but to intensify your online vitriol until you run out of breath.

Before now, I used to think it is a result of poverty, but the news coming from South Korea says otherwise. The wave would certainly get to Africa, especially Anglophone countries and those who practice the Western version of Christianity. Honestly, should the vitriol continue unabated amidst economic woes, the institution of marriage in these African countries would face massive attacks. But when it does, I won't be surprised as I have stated that if Nigeria was as prosperous as Malaysia, most women WOULD not marry the men.

It is a only a matter of time.

Thislifee:
Same here, I have most female friends outside but they don't even send money at all. One of them on my birthday asked for my account number and guess what? She used her Nigeria bank account to send me #5000. I was mad and I asked for her account to send her back the rubbish money, she didn't wanted to give me then I sent the money to *her mother through a friend saying it was from her through me. I hate rubbish!

I am curious, how much do you think she should have sent to you? Also, how close we both of you.

killsmith:
You have a point. Before you get to the issue of brideprice, you have to deal with the arrogance, ruthlessness and heartlessness of the igbo woman.
But this is also caused by our culture of worshipping women. My service year at onitsha opened my eyes. I saw onitsha business men spoiling little 18 year old girls with millions of naira. And they grow to become arrogant.

Igbo men compete too much for women and this has spoilt our women.

I talk am. The men caused these things. They should not complain.

Jman06:
Igbo ladies are single even in old age not because of bride price but because of their greedy choices (which they like to term 'standard'). If Igbo ladies were less greedy in their choices, Igbo men would not have problem with paying bride price! Igbo men are rather scared of the high demands and expectations of these ladies after marriage. Such high demand can send a man to his early grave and no man wants to die untimely, so they'll rather keep such greedy igbo ladies at arms length even if it means marrying a moderate lady from another tribe. Many Igbo ladies are mentally spoilt in their minds on what the role of a man should be.

It is a catch-22 situation as Igbo men want their women to be subservient and obey their authority. In return, the women seek men who can provide everything they need. The reason some Igbo men marry non-Igbo women (not all as most Igbo men marry Igbo women) is because the demands are lesser, and to a great extent, Igbo men are capable of providing in comparison to these non-Igbo women's men.

Igbo men moulded their women to what they are today.

sukkot:
ok so you are not talking about japa then. You are talking about someone who wants to go and look for money abroad and return home. It’s totally different from japa. To japa is to go and fully integrate your children into that society and to become that society and be at peace and feel fully accepted and a part of it with no intention to ever return unless something unforeseen happens. That’s the spirit of japa is total integration. But you are just describing someone looking for money who don’t mind living in the belly of the beast without fully integrating so long as the money is good. Not everybody is chasing money. Most want a sane society where they feel safe and accepted

Based on this, the UK wins. How come you didn't include France?

Regarding the bold, apart from maybe the US due to its historical population, I dare say elsewhere, blacks aren't accepted by the society they find themselves. Which is largely OK as humans are tribal. Where blacks, especially black Africans, would be accepted is sub-Saharan Africa.

sukkot:
hehe bro all these things you are saying though, you are approaching it from a survivalist point of view with no consideration for social and mental well-being. I am talking about japa in the true sense of the word japa and total integration into the new society and not just living in china as some alien entity that cannot fully integrate . 😄 you cannot fully integrate into Asia, if you have children you will not like USA, those European countries you mentioned are too white. Brah just accept UK is the daddy of them all

If so, I agree. I do agree that mental wellbeing is key as one lives amongst people who look like each other. The US has a significant black population, especially in the south and southeast. Also, there are many Nigerians in both regions. Apart from guns, I don't see the difference in raising children in either the US or the UK. While mental wellbeing is good, money is gooder. Both go in tandem. But I rank money higher than mental wellbeing. So, for that reason, I would have Switzerland or Singapore (the weather helps too) instead of the UK. The option of returning to Africa or even the Caribbean is always on the desk. Dem no tire person blockos to the diaspora. So, when returning, return with a bigger bag, not the small purse the UK offers. Sorry, but I love money, I really do. It offers freedom to choose and I love to be free.

In summary, the US is the best, unarguably.

IOXOI:
Correction best place for Nigerian

NOTE: not all black speak English

In my opinion, bequeathing us with English is the best thing the British did. The top economies in sub-Saharan Africa are Anglophone countries (Nigeria, South Africa, Kenya and Ghana). Should Namibia's oil wealth be reflected in the economy, that would be an addition. Other than Spanish and Chinese, simply due to numbers, English is the world's most widely spoken language, especially in business and education. So, for that very reason, a skilled Nigerian has greater chances of fitting in anywhere before a Francophone or Lusophone Africa.


Scenes where Koreans and Chinese converse with Japanese in English mesmerise me. Also, it is the same language Chinese speak with Indians, Arabs, South Americans and Southeast Asians. The use of English in the global economy offers us opportunities non-Anglophone Africans cannot access or compete for. This is why, aside from population reasons, we tend to dominate in fields where you see black Africans. Most of the time, those in second and third place are Ghanaians and Kenyans.

Unfortunately, because we speak English, we neglect learning other important languages such as Spanish, Chinese, German and even Swahili.

sukkot:
Let’s analyze the whole planet
1- that whole South America region is full of sapa and dangerous gangs. Even their own people are japaing out of their
2- America is too dangerous. Over a billion guns hiding waiting to blast. You just have to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Too much violence and psychos and weirdos
3- Canada, boredom will destroy your life
4- other African countries ? All got the same struggles like naija. No jobs
5-other European countries ? Black man no get any levels there at all plus language barrier
6- Russia, nothing Dey there. No job for black man
7- Asia, no job for black man and language barrier
8- Arab countries, dem no rate black man there
Pacific islands, sapa full there well well
9- Australia, e too far

And that’s the whole world leaving us with uk. They speak English, there are over 400 Nigerian restaurants, black man get small levels eg kemi badenock and umanah and David lami etc, suya spot Dey everywhere, naija parry everywhere, only 6 hours away from naija, jobs Dey yafunyafun although e fit be wiping yansh sha lol, you will not be to homesick if you move to areas like Peckham, it’s culturally diverse, if clubbing is your thing club Dey everywhere .

Conclusion ? Uk is the best place for a black man

Sukkot has come again.

You forgot Bim Afolami.

Regarding Asia, it has to be East Asia or nothing. Anywhere in Asia as a black man should be for business or tourism, not paid employment. Singapore is the exception due to geography, but included because it is majority Chinese. The more Chinese people a society has, the higher one's chances of getting paid employment. By this, I mean Taiwan, Mainland China and Hong Kong. Cultural cousins like Korea and Japan are also included. Focus on science and technology-related jobs. Humanities jobs are for the natives unless one was born and bred to navigate the intricacies in language and cultural norms. There are jobs, but you go work o, know the language and adhere to the rules.

The koko is that people have to be skilled. Once the individual is skilled (relevant skills), residence does not play a major role. There are Nigerians working corporate jobs in Switzerland, Finland, Norway, Singapore etc. People just have to be at their very best in order to live a satisfactory life.

P.S. The US is the best place for any black professional. Guns aside, it is a capitalist paradise. Nigerians there are richer than other Nigerians in the diaspora. In fact, I have a hunch that Nigerians in China would be wealthier than those in Europe (this is subject to research). These Nigerians would come behind those in the US. The US is a blessed capitalist heaven, and I love it for that reason. Any Nigerian with work authorisation to work in the US would out-earn every other Nigerian in the diaspora.

pansophist:
Bone my guy, you are still in rage mode. This is why you don't just date anybody, but take time to know them before jumping.

I dare say that the majority of humans are suffering from a lack of character, which forms the basis for traits such as being faithful, truthful, straightforward, honorable, etc.

No honor among thieves. Thieves don't even trust each other with their money, but they will go to the bank as normal people after their stealing operation to deposit their theft.

Because even thieves need trust, faithfulness, safety of their cash, guarantee of access, privacy, and all the nice qualities banks have. They are the losers, not you. Separate emotions from fact. With time, you feel fee good, but with a clear conscience.

Using the same analogy, your fiancee and your work colleague are like the two thieves. After they have satisfied their lust and vanity, they will realize that they need the above-stated traits (eg faithfulness) for a relationship.

What goes around comes around. If they both betray you for their lust, they will betray themselves, just a matter of time. Life is straightforward, and if you understand the rules, you won't bother yourself much.

You lost nothing, but she lost a man that loves her. You lost a woman that was not there in the first place. She is just a fake matter occupying space, like a bubble.

People are good not because they say they are, but because their actions prove so. And do not take revenge, it isn't worth it. Let them be and watch the show.

because in the end, after the adrenaline of attraction dies down, they will realize they can't offer themselves love in the form of duty, sacrifice, faithfulness, etc, and that's when you win.

Our actions like are seeds, only a matter of time, it will grow and then, we will know if the previous planting (behaviors) was worth it. Then regret sets in, and then you win. You will laugh last, but you will laugh best.

I envy your sons.

Gerrard59:
But here you are arguing that you can not leave a woman who aborted "your baby" against your wish.

You people never learn.... To dey pity people wey get issues inside marriage get as e be except an arrangee marriage. You are seeing these things but is hell-bent on marrying her. Tomorrow, we go read please hide my identity.

Ntorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

uzomakanaki:
bro why will you beat a woman? Is it not better you guys go your way?

But you want to deal with your senior colleague. You want to deal with someone higher than you for where you don chop food.

uzomakanaki:
you don't need a further explanation bro

You are a notoriously obstinate fellow. I am glad you got dealt with.