₦airaland Forum

uzomakanaki:
Good day Nairalanders.

What could make a lady date her fiancee's colleague? I'm done with ladies for now. This a bad experience.

I got a job for my now ex fiancee in the organisation where I work. We dated for 2 years. She was posted to a different branch office not far from mine.

A year on the job I began hearing rumours that she's going out with a senior colleague of mine in the same office with me. Those that I heard it from didn't know we were dating.

I confronted her and she denied it. I was not comfortable with her response, and one day she came to spend the weekend with me, I decided to go through her chat, I could not believe what I saw in her chat with this guy in question.

They've gone far to the extent of having sex with themselves which was said in the chat.

The next morning I confronted her with evidences of what I saw in her chat with my colleague, she became furious that I had no right to check her chat, with no sign of remorse. I was broken and at that point ended the relationship.

I've requested for a transfer out of that branch, cos I want to deal with this guy. Cos he's fully aware we were dating and have met us on different occasion outside.

Since the break up with my ex, he has been avoiding me in the office.

But for the guy I'll deal with him.

She showed no remorse because na your senior colleague. For dating that senior colleague, she sees herself above you in that organisation. Now, that is the same colleague you want to deal with?! What sort of braggadocio is that? Why do you think the senior colleague cannot deal with you before you try yours? Why do you think your ex-GF cannot collaborate with your senior colleague to remove you from the organisation? Remember, he is your senior colleague, so he has more say in the firm's affairs.

fyzaila:
When Men that were dons in the game were advising you to be weary of her last year in your last thread, instead of you to listen and adhere nooo you were confidently vouching for her, now see where it has landed 😉 😆😂

OP is so gullible.

She even challenged him for checking her phone.

If OP wants a good girl, he has to be a good dude. It is that simple. You cannot ask for what you cannot give.

None of you lots there, including your so-called navy personnel, deserves a good girl. In the first place, why offer five million naira just to have an account in the bank? If the lady had declined his sexual lust, would he have continued with the account opening?

All these bloody hypocrites with Internet access.

ednut1:
sometimes i say to myself why i even argued with those people

The annoying aspect of the mendacious tale of "Nigerians abroad pay lots of taxes and bills" be say there are equally other places in the world with lower taxes and things work. So, even if the UK or Germany has high taxes, a skilled Nigerian with a British or German passport can move to those low-tax environments to work and enjoy the same standard of living as in the UK or Germany.

If you notice, those who preach that gospel are either dual nationals or cannot leave Nigeria. The standard of living in developed countries is way higher than in Nigeria. But we had one Agbadorian who said Africans are richer than Europeans and Americans.

Viper000:
yes, 99 percent of ladies are not decent.
I’m even surprised that OP don’t know all female bankers are cooperate ashawo.

Typical illiterate Nigerian who spews out numbers without supporting the claims. Honestly, Nigerians are not intelligent people o. I wish other Africans realise this and not get deceived by the arrogant tweets and boasts Nigerians put on social media.

Plenty of Nigerians are terrifically unintelligent!

Brighton1:
it’s not a crime to walk up to a lady and tell her u like her and you would like to be her friend… from there who knows maybe she might be your future wife.
I no dey after chop and clean mouth, baba I dey look for decent and loyal girl to not just date but marry.

Story story.... What about the women in your church and neighbourhood?

Southern Nigerian men and the desire for chaste ladies even after despoiling a significant proportion of their women with money and debauchery.

If she is the one in the background, she has pretty nice boobs. Very fondable and suckable.

Zinosky10:
Where are all the women in NL. They should come xplain how they carry such deadly disease and never care to treat it. Does it mean that they don't feel the symptoms?.

Yes, for gono, women can have it for as long as three years, but they won't know. Ironically, it is easy for women to contract STDs since their sexual organ is a wide and easily accessible compared to men. Na why condom dey very important.

Tomorrow, some unintelligent people will say those of us abroad pay too many bills and taxes. As if one does not see what is being paid for. Or those in Nigeria don't pay bills. Anyway, it is why I term them as unintelligent people. This means the vending machine business in Japan can never work in Nigeria, theft issues aside.

@OP: I can understand how you feel. I have been there. My parents own hotels, and I know how much goes into fueling alone, maintenance aside. Just like you, I once thought of going into a business selling ice creams (just as Coldstone), but the power situation in the country made me cancel it. There is a reason most people prefer trading over manufacturing. Using generators isn't even the issue, but with the fuel price and unavailability of electricity, one doesn't even know when you will break even.

babasolution:
Southwesterners are in other regions too incase you don't know

Well, you should say this to the Ronuists. They believe that their kith aren't domiciled elsewhere in Nigeria.

BrodaBenad:
.. shut the fvck up bloody liar

Infact there are more Yorubas in northern Nigeria than Igbos I know that because I have traveled far and wide Nigeria

All studies have shown that only 7.9% of all the people entering Lagos are from SE a Whooping 89.3% are from rusticated brownroof states like Oyo and Thier rest poverty stricken states

You people live in lies

SE has the highest number of both upper classes and mid class people in Nigeria

SE has the richest household

Trust me, in a debate or argument or show of ethnic superiority in a public space, you will win resoundingly when you support your claims with facts. Why should anyone believe your numbers when they are not supported? While a stat from the NBS shows that the SE has the lowest poverty rate across Nigeria, that doesn't necessarily translate to having the "highest number of both upper classes and mid-class people in Nigeria" or the "SE having the richest households".

I believe when these claims are supported with peer-reviewed facts from reputable and verifiable sources, we can have a better discourse and with those facts, certain misconceptions about the SE and other parts of Nigeria are demystified.

komzy589:
Nonsense!
You’re trying to make your wishes a reality. There’s no country in this world that has more men than women.
You don’t need to deeply study genetics to have this understanding.

Actually, you are wrong. It is the opposite - no country has more women than men. Male preference tweaks or renders false your genetic analogy, which you didn't explain how it corresponds to more female births.

https://www.statista.com/statistics/1328107/global-population-gender/#:~:text=Over%20the%20past%2022%20years,2022%20were%20below%2015%20years.
https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2022/08/31/global-population-skews-male-but-un-projects-parity-between-sexes-by-2050/
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/worldviews/wp/2015/08/19/see-where-women-outnumber-men-around-the-world-and-why/
https://qz.com/335183/heres-why-men-on-earth-outnumber-women-by-60-million

Adakintroy:
All the yanga and new age rational na because of exploding population anyway. Human always acting they came up with the thought all by themselves. Gay right and all.

Wait after Ukraine come out of this war and go ask them to legalize gay marriages or this sought of progressive shit. Na then you go know say gay rights are regressive laws. When you want to improve your population. Enshrine more men on men and see how you multiply?

Even though I am not too religious, I agree that of late, humans have tried playing God. As for Ukraine and even Russia, the number of unmarried women and childless generation the war has created is and would be catastrophic.

Time to find a Slavic baddie Poland with all its conservatism no dey born plenty or even Lithuania or Romania. Now, the small men wey Ukraine get don kpeme finish.

What a time to be a black African man. _{At least, since we cannot build a functioning black dominated society, let's spread our seeds around the world.}

GUNITGuy:
a trend also in Europe and America .......No wonder alibaba keep advertising rubber anytime their adver pops up on my laptop while i want to study.......Rubber investment in the nearest future would surpass Oil and Gas ....Price of toys to go up

Preach to me sir, what do you know about rubber and its export trends? That is, does Nigeria produce enough rubber and how much of it is exported?

Thanks.

luminouz:
What's this one saying bayi?

S/he is correct. China does have some problems and I do wish they get solved (the birth rate is the toughest to solve tho as it is a global phenomenon). Africa needs a strong and prosperous China.

luminouz:
Na to go china be that na

Enough oyel wells!!!🤣

N.B: isn't it ironic that all these Chinese women are
educated, yet unhappy? They get the perks of education but are not willing to sacrifice anything to the society that funded them. The society that MEN built, bled and died for!! How will they think China will be if no one gives birth? Yet the so called uneducated ones are
marrying and thriving. That's the good thing about men. We don't scream and complain to take care of our duties. We just do it, education or not. It's only women who believe education and /or money makes her above marriage, men and child-bearing.

You are right across all aspects. But South Korea's case is the worst. Whatever you see in China, multiply by 100, and you get that of South Korea.

That is an imported beverage, most likely from Indonesia. Indonesia has cocoa like Nigeria, although in fewer quantities as she is more focused on palm oil, which we still import from the archipelago nation.

Buy Nigerian to grow the naira.

Acidosis:
Ignore that illiterate.

Anyone who doesn't "think in Yoruba" is automatically assumed to be from the South East.

Like most Tinubu supporter, he's a very ignorant and grossly uneducated. Many like him are yet to realise that there are more people from the South South in Lagos than from the South East.

Without being accused of cynicism, please where did you get that information from? The only way I think of it being accurate is that south south as a geopolitical region has so many ethnic groups, unlike the homogenous Southeast. But numbers are important since you stated it as a categorical fact.

To be fair though, the southwest receives a lot of people from other regions because it is Nigeria's most prosperous region. However, other regions, including Kogi which is mocked here, rightfully so anyway, can equally be prosperous.

Acidosis:
If you want order, cleanliness, reasonable transit time, and sanity, you shouldn't be in Lagos.

Relocate to Uyo or Abuja.

Akwa Ibom (Uyo) is the cleanest city in Nigeria and one of Africa's cleanest sub-nationals (according to more than 20 independent studies, not hearsays).

In terms of cleanliness and order, Lagos will NEVER be as clean or organise as Uyo, no matter what anybody from APC does.

As SoNature said, it is the way the country's economy is structured, especially for a heterogeneous country. Japan, for instance, has Tokyo as its economic nerve centre with the best jobs and commercial activities. However, it is homogeneous, so those in, say, Fukuoka in the south or Hokkaido in the north would not be so worried as commentators here, including those residing abroad as black people, of "foreigners" moving to their regions. So, young graduates, especially from other parts of the country, have no choice but to move to Lagos.

Nigeria should be structured like the United States. For all its ills, I admire the way governance is spread across the US.

Mille:
Meanwhile as we speak, there are thousands of you loaded into night buses and trailers on their way to Lagos. Everyone in that landlocked shitty region dreams of coming to Lagos. The unlucky ones wey remain never get transport fare and accommodation money.

You reside in Germany as a black man. If a German tells you the same thing, I hope you won't accuse him or her of racism?

Atlantis585:
Where are Adesina’s children schooling?

In the United States where he Akin studied and worked most of his life!

Bloody hypocritical elitist Nigerian!

obaidan:
Adeshina should relax....his children are probably somewhere in JpMorgan or World Bank in Neyw York building career. Are they not Nigerian Youths, he should bring them to Ile-Ife na to come and head one GTB or First Bank branch

I thought it was Femi Adesina, so I didn't bother to open the thread, but upon reading through, it was Akin - a man who had his PhD from Purdue University and worked in both the EU and the US. This man is a naturalised American o.

Nigerian elites are not only unintelligent but cruel and wicked!!!!!!!

lastkingsman:
Take it easy na

Sorry, but I won't take it easy, especially during these trying times. Honestly, if he were my brother, I would have disassociated myself from him. He would be solely responsible for everything. This also applies if the girl was my sister.

I detest irresponsible people! I really do! Does it mean those of us who haven't given woman belly don't like children?! Does it mean we don't like to fvck skin to skin?! I have stated it here that I love raw sex, but the consequences scare me, so I would rather use a condom. Times are freaking hard, but we have one cretin who is making things harder simply because he is the only son. God punish him with the mentality of being the only son! Nonsense! Only sons should be focused on lifting their families out of multidimensional poverty, not impregnating women left, right and centre!

Foolish girl who would see buying Postinor as a bad thing, but decided not to close her legs! Idiot!

NeckingNgulping:
Your girlfriend should act mature in this if she wants to spend the rest of her life with you. Yeah, people get pregnant in relationships out of carelessness when they never wanted to. And I'm never against abortion. It depends on the circumstances.

In this case, since you love this girl and you want to marry her, there's no need to abort the child if she will accept to marry you too.

The biggest scam that originated from our society is when they say it's a taboo to have a child before marriage.

Wedlock isn't really the issue, but his ability to cater for the family as he is expected to (all males are expected to do the same anyway). He stated that he is broke and in his final year. Had it been his being the only son translated into coming from a family that could back him financially, this would not have been a problem. Also, both and especially the lass, are in their final year. This pregnancy disrupts that timeline in an important period in her life.

The girl too has 50% of the blame. So stoopid to allow a stoopid and broke boy to ejaculate into her without using Postinor, which is another stoopidty.

Jesus! Nigeria has so many stoopid people for crying out loud!!!! What happened to Postinor, considering her family background and present realities?!

If your woman doesn't want to keep that child knowing full well you'll marry her, show her the exit door, because she doesn't care about your happiness.

What's the point of killing the child of a to be husband because of what the church will say and societal construct and still want to stay with the man.

As much as his happiness is important, hers is also necessary. He does not have the funds. Dem dey final year. And you just want him to show her the exit door because she aborted. This is why she should have insisted on condom!!!!!!!!! DrFunmi is right here. The entire baggage is on the woman. Now now, you have suggested exiting, which is pretty easy for any man. But the woman cannot.

Young women should learn a thing or two. How much is Postinor in Nigeria sef? Last I knew, e no pass 500 naira.

jedisco:
The point here is that except children start being made and parented in labs, they hardly get to choose at least not in the way they hope to. With the care sector post-Brexit, the choice for the UK was either to ratchet up taxes and device ways for Boomers to give back their wealth to pay for British care or look for cheap labour abroad. The choice was hurriedly the later. The end result is now causing moans.

Many western nations are sitting on a demographic landmine which is becoming more obvious as years role by. Due to this, Germany opened its doors to millions of refuges. Canada only recently streamlined the pathway for many folks. The only nation that has largely stuck to its guns is Japan and even they are now increasingly looking out. Yes, they all rightly want to preselect those who come.
There are thousands of Africans naturalized in the UK. I wonder how many came via a lottery or 'diversity visa'. We are largely here cos someone sat and illustrated to the government that the UK would benefit more from us being in than being out hence whatever visa pathway we used.

In the future, countries will have to make do with whatever population they have as the need to constantly increase the population isn't sustainable as birth rates plunge across countries of varying development levels. Apart from Africa and South Asia, most countries have TFRs below 2.1.

Ezechi18:
I will go straight on this!

She came to my side on 6th February, we had se'X using the pull out method without protection.
She was supposed to see her period at that month but nothing show, on the 2nd March, she carried out test and told me she pregnant.

We are in our final in school.
I want a child because am the only son of my parent but she want abortion because of shame as to when she will go back to school, She's a churchy kind of girl and people know her very well.

I promised her marriage but don't know how to do it after the abortion.
Although am broke as well.

You are a BASTARD!

You knew you were broke, yet you had unprotected sex with a woman and want her to keep the baby because of "I am the only son of my parents"! And so freaking what?! Who effing cares if you are the only son? Didn't you think of the financial implications when you were thrusting?! You promised marriage is pointless because as you stated, you don't have money. To further show how stooopid you are, your being the only son of your parents didn't energise you to work towards financial comfort but rather, you spent that energy ejaculating when both of you are not ready.

I also blame the stoopid girl for allowing unprotected sex. Young women MUST insist on condoms if they are not mentally prepared to raise a child let alone for men who are not ready.

Both of you are stoopid and bastards!

Santa2:
@ the bolded..I know cases where people planned well and still got the burnt end of the stick. Its not really a one size fit all. Someone I know after being sponsored for 3 and half years, His organisation filed for bankruptcy and when under. That's how dude found himself without sponsorship and with just 90days to find another. Despite being a software developer he was unable to get a job to sponsor him within the time period. He got several offers but just not one that would sponsor. Bobo was well established here, bought his house, and all. Luckily he already had plan B else na back to Tibunu and sundry. He still feels burnt on how he had to leave the country. May life not happen to us despite all our plans.

Interesting tale. But sha, in my opinion, property purchase should be done when one has a solid foothold in the country (permanent residence at least). Na so those long-time Indians at Facebook and Google had to sell their properties after being laid off by those companies.

MrAAA2:
It's sad to hear this. Others have to listen too.
Unfortunately, your options are limited, and you cannot exit the country through air travel.

Your legal option is to present to leave the country and probably suffer an EU ban for a short period.
Y
This is the pitfall of some admissions we advise against. You know what you could have done... 1. Work while studying 2. Defer or take semester leave if possible during your study period so you could have worked.

The choices aren't pleasant but...

That works for postgraduate studies, not undergraduate. How much she wan earn to cover living expenses and tuition fees? This issue of exchange rate na why many young Japanese students no fit run their undergraduate studies outside the country. E get one woman wey dey work three jobs (I didn't ask of her husband) to sponsor her child at Western University in Canada. The exchange rate can be suicidal.

Krissy01:
hi guys I need advice
I'm already in a bleeped up situation and I don't know what to do so I need some advice. so I moved to the Netherlands for my bachelor's degree in marketing I've been here for 1yrs and some months now and with the naira rate I've been unable to pay my tuition for some months now plus I couldn't take my exams because I was de-registered. now my school told IND(the immigration ) about my situation and I'm being asked to leave the Netherlands. so all my resources from the beginning is just gone plus I didn't even get the degree I initially came for.im not ready to move back home especially now that things are getting worse.
I'm just really sad right now and don't know what to do. I need help 😭

I am sorry for being cynical, but what made you opt for a bachelor program in one of Western most expensive countries (both living costs and foreign students' tuition fees)? Why bachelor's which is four years at least, and not a master's?

I, Ednut and Tensa20 have written countless times in this section that bachelor programs should not be pursued unless your parents are VERY WEALTHY to run the entire process for four years regardless of exchange rates and whatnot. You are an undergraduate student, so it is unthinkable for you to imagine paying tuition fees or catering for living expenses from your part-time jobs or depending on a certain exchange rate to be able to afford tuition fees and living expenses.

Also, I am curious, since your program is marketing, is the course in English or Dutch? If the former, do/can you speak Dutch regardless?

According to the system, you are already illegal (you stated this), so I no know wetin else to comment. But next time, and for naive readers, do BSc/BA in Nigeria before going abroad to study. There are good schools in Nigeria. As e bad reach, na from public universities most people wey study abroad graduate from. Na from public university a Nigerian who just got employed as an assistant professor at Cornell graduate from. Na even public universities those who did their BSc at private universities run their MSc before going abroad for their PhD.

Scholace:
what if one get about 70% funding in a school in US, does it worth covering the deficit?

As long as it is not full funding, everything depends on your sponsors' pockets. Based on the current exchange rate, full funding or rich sponsors or a resident American who is ready to cover the bills. Whether it is worth studying in the US is up to the individual.

jedisco:
Caady shared here how her dependant spouse did same and within a few years, they had a home.

Regarding children, thats a moot point. Every western nation sorely needs kids as birthrate has remained below replacement level. It is those naturalized kids that'd be the Sunaks of tomorrow helping to offset the rising wage costs of the elderly which is the burden their parents are shouldering today.

Sorry to interrupt, but when developed countries wish to increase their birth rates, they don't mean people like us o. They mean "their own people". So, while the rate might increase, they are not completely happy about the people who constitute that increment.

pharmow:
If you don't know this by now, I'm not sorry to say you have wasted all the money your parents spent on your education. Earning a salary will make you a living but owning a business will make you a fortune.

He has to define what is "rich" here. Those working at NLNG are rich. The owner of Ebeano Supermarket is rich too.

What does he mean by "rich"?

goodman023:
The study route is the only route I know. The work route these days is already scam enough. They’ll dupe one of his life savings with the disguise of helping to get a work visa

Team Agent arranged a work visa for me.

Please do your research about work visas and working in the US, even with a bachelor's degree from your home country.