₦airaland Forum

Bla, bla, bla

Tell me u're kidding please...too funnny

Not getting anything twisted, Mister. U asked if her kid is the first person to collapse at the embassy like it's normal n something every Nigerian parent should be used to. I have no intention of watching my children collapse at any embassy n can feel her pain. Tis the sole reason many women leave the comfort of Nigeria, family n our fantastic weather to send 3 months abroad just to give birth cos our country cannot assert herself re the rights for her citizens.

MisterLongman:
And what difference do you think her rantings on twitter will make.
If she so much want to make a difference, then she should have taken the matter to the appropriate authorities..... Besides I didn't say not being the first to collapse at the embassy is some form comfort, don't get it twisted

So she has a price?

Hopefully, it might make a difference. She emphasized those long queues and exhaustion. N the fact that her kid isn't the first person to collapse at the embassy is supposed to be some form of comfort, right? It's actually a disturbing pattern.

Actually, feel the Nigerians at the embassies may be meaner than the oyibos sef.

MisterLongman:
I just tire....... Shey na the pikin go be the first person to collapse for embassy.
Now what does she expect the peeps she's trying to inform on twitter to do? Run down to the US embassy to confirm whether na true or false

IMHO - None!

In a polygamous home, there's likely to be this subtle competitiveness which leads to sibling rivalry, envy n in some horror cases, jazz.

A single parenthood feels like carrying an extra weight cos the mom has to play two roles and occasionally have to contend with questions from kids, like who's my dad, how come everyone has one and I don't. Sometimes, I feel single mums sort of feel guilty n try to compensate for this by not being tough enough.

None are going to be first choices for any sane being but condition, they say... Cos, if a woman in her 40s finds out her hussy has married another woman, in Nig at least, most women will keep reiterating that they are not leaving their hussy's house and will go on to protect their children's interest. N for single mums, like u find out the guy u were planning to get married too is not everything u thot he was, or he dumps the chick, she might have no other option than to be a single mum.

I guess the most important thing is to raise kids that are way better than we are, hopefully!

Satanic ke? N it doesn't matter if she protested or not...she may have been exhausted n decided to please u which is wat marriage is about esp when it's a 2 way affair.

What really irked me bout ur post is the mind games u played. She was begging u n u were forming James Bond, u said.

Marriage n relationships in general r like a compilation of memories. Ppl often say she just snapped...trust me, it's always a long time coming.

Best of luck with ur union!

IDEApro:
You must be evil and satanic.

How did you come to the conclusion that my wife MUST be tired to fix dinner for her hubby when BOTH of us came back from church service?

Did I mention in my post she protested?

Really? Na by force? Y on earth will she think of that as an option? The only kind of love that makes sense to me is voluntary.

She should thank God for her lucky escape. What if the guy tuned out after marriage? She still has the option to meet a nicer yummier guy without jazz, please. N if she feels so strongly bout this guy, she should take time out n pray to God to bring in the right man into her life. Let's not forget, a child is involved in this case. N whilst I never underestimate the power of prayers, God has given everyman free will. Her ex is ultimately responsible for his choices n decisions.

This!

kmcutez:
Typical Nigerian male. Try to point out some certain hard truths and you are labelled a feminist. Do you even know the definition of a feminist? So tomorrow now, assuming she can no longer provide the basics due to circumstances beyond her control, for example, losing both arms, becoming blind, having an illness that saps all physical energy so that she is mostly bedridden, and you are required to take care of her round the clock, you would divorce her and marry another lady that can provide the basics ba, so you can continue being focused and committed.

Also you said you cannot marry a lady that polishes her nails and on Telemundo, while you do the dish or cook, but is that not what most men do. The woman slaves in the kitchen doing the dishes and cooking, while they sit in front of the TV watching football on Supersport, or you think the women are not tired too.

Why don't you also improve her life by encouraging her to do something with her education so that she can become financially independent, instead of using it to just add a feminine touch and improvement to your life by preparing delicious meals. If something happens to you tomorrow, she can still take care of the kids on her own.

By the way, this is the definition of a feminism

: the belief that men and women should have equal rights and opportunities
: the theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes

Do you see anything wrong it?

Here is the explanation of feminism as taken from wikipedia.

"Feminism is a collection of movements and ideologies that share a common goal: to define, establish, and achieve equal political, economic, cultural, personal, and social rights for women.[1][2] This includes seeking to establish equal opportunities for women in education and employment.

A feminist generally self-defines as advocating for or supporting the rights and equality of women.[3]

Feminist theory, which emerged from feminist movements, aims to understand the nature of gender inequality by examining women's social roles and lived experience; it has developed theories in a variety of disciplines in order to respond to issues such as the social construction of sex and gender.[4][5] Some forms of feminism have been criticized for taking into account only white, middle-class, educated perspectives. This led to the creation of ethnically specific or multiculturalist forms of feminism.[6]

Feminist movements have and continue to campaign for many women's rights – such as the Equal Rights Amendment, the right to own property, equal health care coverage for equal pay, sexual freedom and liberation, and voting – while also promoting body autonomy/integrity, and reproductive rights for women.

Feminist campaigns are generally considered to be main force behind major historical societal changes, particularly in the West, where they are near-universally credited with having achieved women's suffrage, gender neutrality in English, equal pay for women, reproductive rights for women (including access to contraceptives and abortion), and the right to enter into contracts and own property.[7]

Feminists have worked to protect women and girls from domestic violence, sexual harassment, and sexual assault.[8][9] Feminists have also advocated for workplace rights, including receiving the right to paid work, paid maternity leave, and eradicating all forms of discrimination against women.

Feminist advocacy is mainly focused on women's rights, but author bell hooks, among others, argue for the necessity for it to include men's liberation, because men are also harmed by traditional gender roles.[10]

5minsmadness:
Nobody is talking about housemaid. Its his role to marry you and he will, no need to argue. Its your role to take care of him and that includes cooking for him. If you can't do it pls don't marry. Like you said, not everyone is desperate.

It is my role to be his help meet not to take care of him. Listening to some guys talk bout getting married sounds like their would be wife's job description involves being a cook, washer woman n still sexual partner...in other words, taking care of 'him'.

I'm just imagining two tired people coming back from church, where kindness n empathy are being taught. One switches on super sports n is lounging waiting for his carer to serve him dinner, while the other starts cooking indomie n in between switches to eba.

What stops him from helping out? Nothing major? I'm assuming the woman has to work, wake up early to beat Lagos traffic n still contribute to the household purse.

Odillz:
Keep on passing till you clock 46.
Or don't you know there are gracious maids

No risk of that happening, shugah. Thanx for ur concern all the same

I'm just so impressed(?) that inability to cook egusi soup implies even remotely moral decadence.

Now, what if u're under 20 but can cook egusi n efo riro, r u still part of the 'morally decadent generation'? Or egusi n bitter leaf soup cooking skills absolves one of all wrong doing?

I'm just so impressed(?) that inability to cook egusi soup implies even remotely moral decadence.

Now, what if u're under 20 but can cook egusi n efo riro, r u still part of the 'morally decadent generation'? Or egusi n bitter leaf soup cooking skills absolves one of all wrong doing?

5minsmadness:
Why is it the man's role to automatically marry you?

Def not his role to marry me, if he's expecting a house maid. I'd rather pass. Not everyone is desperate, u know.

@ joel3, will it matter so much if they live in mansions but r still jobless n single?

N can u quit with the weird generalisations, not sure what churches u meet such women at... don't ever see such in my church. maybe, I'm more focused on the sermon than on such irrelevant stuff.

GreenWhiteGreen:
These yoruba people

So wrong!!! N to think u call urself green white green is def beyond me.

@ ideapro- I'm lost...why is it the woman's role to automatically fix dinner? Both of u got back from church by 8pm probably after work, y can't u lend a helping hand, say like microwave the soup. If u were anywhere near the kitchen, u would have been aware of the fantastic noodles dish she was making or the challenges she was facing with the soup.

I know I prefer company in the kitchen while cooking so can't really muster much sympathy for u.

Refreshing write up. The root cause of chicks pretending is that marriage is seen as a do or die affair so females oftentimes have to assume roles to get the prize of a Nigerian husband and it's just absurd. Pretending u like to eat something when u don't is plain ridiculous or that I don't fix my nails just to impress someone. So how long will the drama last

Don't know if anyone has watched Basketmouth Blind dates series n it's just so funny n sad (
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCJqrHDbNhk) . 1st date was an off whitey, second was a black American. Both were so crazy n he always ran away but for the 3rd date, he met this Nig girl who said she loves to iron, go to church etc n in her mind was like God I've seen this maga that'll pay my bills.

Recently, I greeted a lady in her late 30s but she's unmarried n the person I was with said u should greet her in a certain way n don't call her madam n I asked Y. The answer was cos she's not married. If this lady now finds a lone suitor, I guess we can't judge her if she pretends just to get married. The subtle discrimination of unmarried females and the subsequent desperation is to blame IMHO

I guess he won't dump her now when they both end up in police cells. I hate one sided parasitic relationships. It's Love ya neighbour as urself, not more than urself girlie. N u can bet she'd be feeding the guy. After they collected 500K, he only gave her 100K. Such an annoying over bread n buttered girl.

N sometimes Y I'm so grateful for everything life took me thru, made me a stronger person. If my parents were wealthy, I can't even begin to imagine how far I'd have gone but all the same everly so grateful to God.

Anything wrong with adoption, please? I'm just so tripped by people that adopt

Spells trouble to me. I never ever over estimate my self control or my strength. U could get a younger female relative to stay with you or an older lady in her late 40s as a house keeper who'd come in about 3ce a week.

Did your inlaws seize her phone or Y can't u call her to ask? Dú honestly think putting up her pics on a public website will help ur cause This is so unpardonable in my books.

Dannidom:
sorry ma but we are not comparing any of them

Really? The title - Are firstborns really brighter ? spells nothing but comparison.

Xx

Truth is, I hate the endless comparison that goes on between kids as parents and relatives are simply unaware of all the harm they're doing such as sibling rivalry, inferiority complex amongst others. I hope that at some point parents can get to realise that every child is unique and blessed with their own strengths and weaknesses. A successful parent is one that understands the child and raises the child in such a manner that empowers the child draw on their strengths and overcome as much as is possible their weakness. fake n failed parents are those that resort to comparing children to egbon, baby of the house n neighbors.

Not sure I get what the rush is for. He can decide to adopt the baby even after the birth of the baby. True love waits...seems like he doesn't feel like he has scored enough points with the lady n is using her vulnerable state to pressure her into accepting him.

IMO this is a wrong tactic as not everyone is bothered bout being a single parent. I can read the chick's mind - I've made a mistake be4 and I def won't be pressured into making another mistake, pregnant or not, and I agree with her. Bobo should court her if he has no ulterior motive n lay off the pressure.

Empty barrels bro...make the most noise and consistently too. Get over urself, truthfully n try being a girl's friend first. Most Nig females (myself inclusive) hate guys being over familiar. Better luck, next time hopefully

Xx

I knew she wasn't crazy, sha.

Madam, please run n never look back. There are many things money cannot buy, esp Peace of mind.

N pls, u're free to (RE) marry but look be4 u leap.

People are too nosy and entwined in people's affairs in this country sha all under the guise of being a bro's keeper. How d'u know the girl hasn't changed n how du know she hasn't discussed her past with her hussy?

Why the emphasis on the female child? At what age did YOU start cooking?

An 18 yr old is old enough to vote, should be in the uni and yes shd be able to cook.