chaircover: This moremi sha

Who are the fat lazy women advising the poster to stay at home with her kids? I dont know about fat and lazy, but i dont think that anyone here has advised her to sit at home twiddling her thumbs.

And what is wrong with a 40+ woman having twins? if God blesses me with twins when I am over 40, I will grab the blessing with both hands. Career ko career ni. What have I been doing with my life since I graduated, that will not afford me to spend a few years at home with my twins

Why can't you just laugh at my imaginary "fat, lazy women" and keep it moving? Did I hit a sore spot? Are you actually fat and lazy? LOL!!!! Guilty conscience buruku!

As you lay your bed, so shall you lie on it. You're free to think that unplanned "twins" after 3 children are a "blessing" from God but don't dare complain when in a decade or two, your classmates are becoming bank MDs and business leaders and you're only a basic market woman. There are women who actually plan these things. They take a break from the job market to have their kids early (and tightly spaced) and then return quickly once the children are at school age. That's the way it has always worked in my extended family since my Grandma left for London to train as a midwife for 1yr in the 1950s after 6kids, and then came back to join a local hospital. Her kids turned out wonderful and they loved her dearly because she inspired them all to live lives of diligence and life-long learning. Planning works! Try it! Children are not an excuse for having no career in this day and age.

Having twins @ 40 after 3 children is just a sign of illiteracy; family planning is quick, relatively painless and not that expensive. You can't continue thinking like a village woman and expect city-woman results.

Whatever you do, please don't listen to the fat, lazy women advising you to "enjoy" God's blessings and stay at home with your kids. Once your kids start school, get back on your feet and go find a job! Hopefully, you'll be done with your BSc by then. And please, make sure you visit a family planning center. Three kids is enough! Don't just rely on condoms because one night of passion, one little mistake and ... GMAM! ... you're pregnant with twins and back to square one. I am saying this because it happened to somebody I know. Her 40+yr old self is now tugging around toddler twins and feeling very foolish because she has had to put her promising career on hold again.

Hahaha! I doubt this is ever going to happen. Do you know how many naija politico kids attend British boarding schools every year? Do you know how much of our wealth these kids transfer to Britain? These schools cost 25-30k GBP per year (plus about 10k GBP for room & board) so do the math!

tampa1871:

You are so pitiful and heartless. People like you should rather dwell in the wilderness and not among sane people. The woman above should be commended even if only for bringing the plight of this innocent child to the open. You definitely have an evil mind. This woman meant well and should be encouraged to do whatever it takes to help this child. I know God is working something to bring a change to the life of this child and I pray that whatever it is, God will perfect.

Blah, blah, blah... how many children have you saved today? How many orphans have you adopted and brought into your home? Why don't you go gather all your corrupt thief-thief politicians and send them to the wilderness? Yeye woman!

Chinom:

How do you intend to build that house while living in the US or UK ?. Building a house in Nigeria while sitting on your lazy backside in US will cost you twice the normal amount. Here is my advice to you. Your husband has to move first.Find a very cheap accomadation, move in there and then start the construction of a new house.If the funds are available, he can finish the house within a year. Relocating to lagos is all about feelings.You can never have all the situations under controle. The traffic, noise and heat are beyond your controle. But there's no other place on this planet, i would rather be in than Lagos. That feeling of Freedom is not quantifiable.

You, my friend, don't know what freedom is! Abeg, stop calling unnecessary suffer-suffer freedom! Your hard-earned money is better spent in a country with basic amenities, adequate public infrastructure, security and rule of law. I live very comfortably when I visit Nigeria (especially with the maids and drivers) but I don't confuse cheap labor, "highbrow" neighborhoods and generator fumes with freedom. Freedom is NOT living with constant fear of armed robbers; corrupt and violent policemen; unenforceable contracts; TERRIBLE healthcare; interminable traffic; lousy entertainment options; and mediocre but overpriced schools. Please, let's not willfully blind ourselves with a misplaced sense of patriotism or nostalgia.

This is a big FAT lie! Where are the pictures? That Quran must be the smallest Quran in the world for a new born baby to be able to hold on to it! Nigerians and their fabu stories!!!!!!!!!

Nonybb: shut up u dont knw anythng about this country. U suffer frm extreme stupid mind. U re the reason why we had bad publicity and for the whities to see us as dark continent

Daftest statement ever! Publicity is the LEAST of Nigeria's problems. But thanks for the good laugh.

ronkebp: OOOOOgaaa oooo, this relocation thing just tire me, my hubby is so bent on moving back home, i am interested too, but i don't know why i am having a cold feet? Miss-Ife, don't worry, will get your 411, so we can be hooking up, and going to the gym together..... , that would be fun...

Don't let your husband trick you into relocating home without a 100% solid opportunity. If he can't make a way for himself here, then it won't be any easier in Lagos. Everything is lovely from a distance until you move and discover that life getting high on generator fumes, getting robbed in eternal traffic on the way to or from work, and feeling stuck in a chaotic and unplanned economy, is not what you want for yourself and your kids. This wave of unreasonable nostalgia for "home" needs some sanity-checking.

As I currently stand, the only thing that's going to bring me back home to work for another man is if the company is bringing me back in a very senior role, paying me like an expatriate, paying my kids school fees at AIS and getting me a home in VI/Ikoyi/Lekki. Anything else is a waste of my youth and talent . It isn't too much to ask because I have a couple of friends in their thirties that were similarly compensated when they moved back. Why settle for any less when I have a career I am quite pleased with in the US?

^^^^ Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah... how many times do we want to deal with this type of medieval nonsense. If the foolish girl couldn't get on the pill, insist on protection or have an abortion, then she should carry the fetus to term and stop seeking sympathetic ears on the Internet. I just can't stand foolish girls who like to play big girl but can't take responsibility for their big-girl decisions. Did she think she had super-human spermicidal powers when she laid there and let him ejaculate inside her? Why is she acting surprised that the guy, a student, doesn't want a baby? She put herself in this situation and she should get herself out of it. It's a tough world out there and I am sorry that I have no sympathy for self-induced problems.

This thread is just sad. Some people are truly stuck in medieval times. Good luck with the rest of your ruined life. Just pray the boy marries you (and that he hasn't infected you with incurable herpes). Daft girl.

Advanced 419.

She underwent medical treatment with monobenzene and she's going to regret it for the rest of her life because her body will soon be riddled with black patches and the treatment requires that she either stays indoors all day or covers every inch of her skin from direct sun exposure. I wish the foolish woman had loved ones to give her good advice.

OK, now that the usual set of dunces have come out to play, let me clarify myself. @ OP, here's what I REALLY want to say to you: you should shut up and mind your business. Why? The woman is not going to believe you and she will see your accusations as another ploy to rid her of another man. In fact, she will most likely turn YOU into the enemy and don't be surprised if the same sister that happily confided in you turns around and denies the story. Even if the younger sister confirms the accusations, here's another reality check for you: the woman may accuse the sister of "seducing" her husband-to-be, turn YOU and the sister into enemies, and then still go ahead to marry the man. That's the funny way real life works sometimes. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news.

Attempted molestation is a grave accusation and unless you have incontrovertible proof, you should NOT go around accusing somebody else's fiance of rape. If this younger sister (who I am assuming is a full grown adult) can't bring up this issue delicately with HER OWN SISTER, then YOU, an ordinary cousin, definitely have no rights to bring it up.

I sometimes shake my head at the number of foolish people on this board who proffer advice according to some cute little children's book of rules. This isn't some hypothetical scenario in a ethics class. This is real bloody life!!! You want to go accuse a 35-year old woman's fiance, the "ANSWER" to her many years of prayers, the woman she gave testimony in church about, her MIRACLE fiance, of "attempted" rape without solid proof? That's just playing with fire or sticking a burning stick in a bee hive. Please, go ahead and tell the woman but make sure you come back here to tell us how it goes. Just don't say that nobody cautioned you.

Your fiancee's attitude towards conflict is not sustainable. Constructive conflict resolution is an essential part of building a strong relationship. Sweeping things under the rug is like building a house on rubble. Soon enough, the house will start to wobble and trouble will start. I think it's important that you get your wife to politely talk through issues with you. In fact, the fact that she refuses to talk about previous issues means that she is NOT completely over them. I don't know the full context of your relationship but this might be a red flag.

taryour:

realy i dont understand u oo. Well d guy in question already called it quits with ur cousin which is good radiance to bad rubbish,abi u no like am like dat? Isnt it better dan ur cousin datin d guy and d guy goin abt molesting all d females in ur family.
BTW if u tell ur cousin she wunt even believe u cos she already dosnt wnt anyone to intervain,except u av a good evidence to justify ur claim which i doubt u av. I would av advice u n ur sister set him up and av him covered on a camera as an evidence but ur chances are 50-50 as he myt not fall for ur setup n tell ur cousin he was being seduced.. Now what

No, the guy who called it quits with her cousin is a different guy. This new guy, her defacto sugar-son, is the one trying to molest her younger sister.

@ OP, I don't know what to say. This is a touchy situation and I wouldn't recommend that you intervene. At 35, the lady might just need to roll the dice, shoot out some babies and deal with her husband's character flaws later. This is the one time I would recommend the good-old Naija "solution": ignore it and put the lady in your prayers for God to open her eyes to her husband's true nature before it's too late!

Yes, definitely UI.

PS - People with extremely high IQs tend to face a greater risk of mental illness. I don't think "reading" has anything to do with it.

Gaggi:

At least the Ibo's don't chase after other people's women.

LOL! I hope you only said the above in jest because your claim doesn't hold up to the slightest scrutiny. Ibo men chase other people's wives ALL the time; same with men all over the world. No ethnic group has a monopoly on adultery.

deal_ordea:
Another idiotic dude on family section!! I checked your profile but nothing tangible was posted except creating a nuisance respond to people's topic...

Hahaha! I am glad you did your research and now know about me. I am a fool's nightmare. Don't annoy me oh!

PS - I see that the bad English isn't a one-time thing. E ya! Pele. You should have paid attention in school. Now, your English haunts the universe with a foul smell.

GboyegaD:

You have added to his worries by advising him. His question is that why do people make marriage difficult however, I guess it was his fears that affected his command of english language.

LOL! Really? Nah so marriage dey panji am? Wahala dey!

This is clearly a spiritual attack. I recommend a 7-day biribiri fast; the fear go jump out!

EnnyP: I need a coy's finanacial statement under IFRS. Tnks.

Choose an industry of interest, find one public company in that industry that's based in a country under IFRS (e.g. any EU country) and check out the "investor" or "shareholders" section of that company's website for annual reports. Download the statements and do a search for "competitors". Most large public companies disclose their competitors somewhere in their annual report.

E.g. If you're interested in analyzing a pharmaceutical company with IFRS disclosures, you might want to check out GlaxoSmithKline: http://www.gsk.com/investors/index.htm.

Relevant competitors would be AstraZeneca, Sanofi or Roche Holdings.

If you don't like pharmaceuticals, just choose another industry. It's pretty easy if you target publicly traded companies and make Google your best friend. Good luck!

purefella: when i see a huge structure like this , what comes to my mind are the suffering the laborers went through under the scorching sun to complete such structures ,some will even falloff the stirs and die

I had the opportunity to observe the construction up-close from a room at the Eko Suites. It appeared to be a very professional and organized construction process; I remember being very impressed. They had a big-ass crane doing all the heavy lifting and the pace was relentless, so I figured the project was well-funded and had a deadline. Happy to see the finished product.

I just don't understand why Total opted for this investment structure. Why didn't Total want to own it outright? Was Paris concerned about unrecoverable capex or about keeping the property on the books? It's an unusual choice for Lagos; really curious to understand the rationale.

deal_ordea: Marriage: these gives me a lot of heart ache everyday when I come across different type of topics been open by member's, be it molestation, se.x starvation,partner trying to create room to understand each other, fighting for dominance, been patient for the other partner, cheating because one partner is not doing is part or the partner is seeing as a taboo due to weight or laziness or financial problems and loads to count of!!! When I read this, It makes me feel like, its this all marriage about Why do some people purnish theirself for the sake of marriage? Been in my late 20's, it makes me scared even though am not a coward, its makes me feel like am making final will just for God to sign me into a trouble nation of mind!!! I know some people would probably say, marriage is a sweet institution where u learn a lot but come to think of it, what happen to the courtship before the marriage, people always claim they are best of friends, they know each other's limit but when marriage is finally involve, they just turn to a beast over night and turn the other partner into a prey which they could toy with just because. He/she is finally my

I read a post on here some few months ago about a certain lady trying to safe her marriage from going down the drain despite the fact that, her husband is beaten the hell out of her everyday making.her to land in hospital on every occassion they had misunderstanding and yet, the religious aspect is involve where her pastor keep assuring her that everything will be fine which she eventually lost her life the so called beast her husband and it got me thinking, has marriage turn to a slave-market?

I have to be honest, religion has turn people into a weakling, it has bring down some people confidence to have a say of what they want in the marriage, it is not a do or die affair again and I will say I am one of those that cherish marriage a lot but the type of marriage people practice this days doesn't help the young's once to go into early marriage again, in the late 60s,70s, 80s, people in their young age gets married with self respect and literally good culture of mind of respecting and loving each other till death do us apart and even after life but its not just so!! hypocrites are too many in marriage and it makes me wanna resolve to been a single father cos am scared of dieing young when have got many great years ahead of me.

So I want to ask you all, why does people turn theirself into slave for the sake of marriage, why does people act badly and turn into a beast for the sake of dominance in marriage!!!

Peace out

What exactly is your point? You are barely making any sense. You are scared of marriage? Then don't fcking get married. Nobody has put a gun to your head.

ps - Instead of worrying about marriage, you might want to invest in a private English tutor. Your command of the language is not the best. Good luck!

Are these for the Nigerian market? These were clearly not shot in Nigeria and don't have Nigerians in it. How can we celebrating finally getting rid of colonialism only to have a slightly different version on our air waves?

The commercials are insipid and terribly unengaging; a mediocre set of ads by a mediocre marketing team. Nigerian mothers make most of the food purchasing decisions for the home and I don't see them responding well to these commercials at all. The second ad is especially egregious. Peak would have been better off flushing their marketing dollars down the toilet.

Just my opinion though and I thank God I am not a shareholder.

pheesayor: Thanks everyone for your suggestion, first I'm not a teacher in his school but a teacher in another school. The mother is not is not in her right mind to care for the kids that's why she's away. The man has a very tight routine daily: goes for jogging early in the morning, afterwards go to his office, drive through traffic from alaba to festac then comes home very tired and still takes time to ensure he does his school assignment or the home assignment he have him, if he doesn't get the sums right he makes sure they solve together at times till about 10-11. And note, the father is always sad whenever the boy doesn't get things right but has refused to listen to the fact that children don't develop the same way and that the boy needs time, he's just stubborn that's it. Its a duplex house so no one hears during the beating except seeing from outside in the evenings when he's beating in the living room so its possible neighbours are not even aware.
I will contact office of the Public Defender in Lagos State for more guide about thi and report back here.
Thank you all.

How do you know all these details about the man?

LOL! Health hazard ko, cancer ni! Abeg, tell your friend to go get her self a di[i]l[/i]do and stop worrying about nonsense. Celibacy has zero health effects. LOL!

Tgirl4real: You guys are just crazy. . .huh

@ eating sand eeww . . .

Me loff d smell of mint N500 or N1000 naira notes.
I loff the smell of janded clothes or anything from there including the people sef
I loff the smell of my hubby early momo
I loff the smell of baby powder and my baby's skin after shower.

Spoken like a correct golddiggger. Three gbosas for you! More power to your money-grubbing elbows! I no blame you at all! Who no like the berra things in life?

polo_b: As for me...Its the smell of okrika wears.

LOL! And what do those smell like, pray tell?

pheesayor: The father has refused to listen to pleas by everyone even his close friends. He recently bought a mini piano for the elder one, something the younger one demanded for before now and didn't get(the elder one attends a private boarding school in otta). We told his teacher about it and the teacher confirms its having a negative effect on the child in school, we told him to discuss it with the father which he did, the beatings reduced for a while but he started again.
The irony is the boy still loves his father but needs help. Any human rights or child rights group I can contact? And what does the child right law of lagos state say about this?

The father clearly has his own psychological issues and this is a clear-cut case of child abuse. However, I am not sure that there is much you can do with regards to bringing-in outside authorities. Why, you might ask? Nigeria has no functioning child welfare system and the boy might fare even worse if he is taken away from his father. It's an unfortunate reality but there's little you can do in the short-term to change things.

Are you sure there is absolutely NOBODY that this man listens to? Not even his boss or colleagues at work? If no, then this is a truly special case and we might need the input of seasoned Nigeria-based child welfare specialists. I am just worried that if all you say is true, then this man might end up killing the child one day (especially because I know that the child's academic performance is very unlikely to improve with the current situation).

Whatever happens in this thread, please ignore JohnDoe100. He's a fcking troll and his opinions are not worthy of a reaction. Replying him will just drag the conversation downwards into the gutter.

dremoney: I suppose we have more contributions from folks well under 25 on this thread. Well lets do some enlightenment.

1. What happens when you get married at 26 but have your first child at 32?
2. What happens when you get married early and all your kids turn out to be females?
3. What happens when you get married early but no happiness due to immaturity
4. What happens when all factors fall in place and you end up dead before 40?(God Forbid)
5. What happens when all factors fall in place and you end up dead at 80? Will you take any of your kids with you?

Peeps please lets learn how to start living our lives. Marriage is overhyped in Nigeria and that explains why alot dont ever escape the rat race. I personally know an MD with a local Oil company whose first child is bout 8 and he's heading to 50 simply because his first wife was unable to have babies.

Now he's certainly living his dream and his kids will definitely grow and have quality education. I'll prefer that to a banking officer at 45 living in a rented 2bedroom in a suburb with 4kids.

My take!!!

I am sorry, but this is just foolish. If at all, a few of your questions make an argument for marrying EARLY, and not late.

@OP, it appears that the father has a limited understanding of child development. First, you can't really compare two children; children are born with different strengths, weaknesses and IQs. Second, no amount of beating and harassment can make that boy as brilliant as his brother if he isn't born with similar academic abilities.

Here's what the father needs to do:

1) Verify that the child is diligently trying his best. The biggest contributor to academic success (at almost all levels of education) is diligence. As long as the child is hardworking and has a good grasp of delayed gratification, then the child will be just fine. What he is doing to this child is dangerous. In an attempt to "beat" his child into academic excellence, he is running a real risk of permanently scaring the child and introducing problems he wasn't born with. As long as the boy is doing his best, no amount of beating is going to make him "smarter".

2) Identify the child's strengths: Some children are gifted in non-academic areas. It would be a real shame if the father causes the child to neglect the areas where he truly excels.

It would not surprise me if the child the father now beats-up every day turns out to be the more successful sibling. That's just the funny way life works sometimes. He needs to chill-out on the beating; it's a counterproductive and dangerous practice.

ps - The posters recommending that the OP call the police need to STOP IT! Call the police for what? In Nigeria? Please, let's stop giving patently foolish advice.