₦airaland Forum

This is a lame, divisionary tactics that seeks to distract the attention of the people from the horrors of insecurity and economic hardships the state faces. It is also a fact that political leaders -- and their counterparts in the administrative realm -- in Nigeria have no solution to the myriad challenges the citizens grapple with.

This theatric is similar to "Notofication" banning the use of 'Black Friday" by kano's hisbah in the state. No clime will survive this kind of shameless fiddling, especially a country riddled with existential problems.

Imaging the guts she displays; invading someone's privacy that assisted her only to cast yourself as a defender of the female folk. Which sane married woman will take a piece of advice from an impressionable, dependent, and starry-eyed girl under the control and protection of her parents?

For the records, this tale is bullshit, beginning from the so-called birthday party, to the offer of phone given by a nonexistent husband. This is another failed, poorly-convinced attack on men in particular and marriage in general.

There is no evidence that the woman is a slay queen. What your chats show is a woman who is conscious of her status, and is poised to direct the chat in a trajection that would reflect her status. Although she made a faulty generalisation which might have evolved from experience engaging guys online, it is better to be late than sorry.

If I were in your shoes, the realisation that is married is enough reason to terminate the chat, since it's obvious you desire more than mere conversation by reply her chats.

It is just a visa-for-marriage affair common with lazy minded African youth, who are both physically and mentally impoverished. That we celebrate this kind of nonsense is a measure of how backward and confused we are as a people. Had it been that this woman is an African, a lot people, including his family members, would have declared fatwa on him. No, a white person is adored and venerated as a god in Africa. Pity!

Imagine the screaming gaps in their age and tell me what this dude intends to benefit from this women if not that he is going to move to the states, and momentarily banish financial poverty in his life. Maybe as a Muslim he might get to dump her after, say, ten or fifteen years, and look for someone more deserving to be called wife. This white aunt looks like his mother. Considering the fact that most female western commence sexual activity early and couple with the fact that teenage pregnancy and early marriage are common over there, this woman is suppossed have children that are the age mate of this guy.

You have done a lot of disservice to the word "love." People who are not contented with what they have, who think the grass is always greener on the other side, are usually left with nothing but regrets when they begin to reap the consequences of their actions. First, you aren't in love with this person as you claimed; you are just infatuated. Second, if you dump him -- something I am sure you have already executed in your mind-- and hook up with the newest guy in your heart, you will always be susceptible to external influence. When the next knight in shining amour comes, it is going to be business as usual.

If it is just because someone used "beautiful" as a word of endearment to lighten up your mood that warrants opening a thread, then it means you don't get to hear people call you "beautiful" quite often. So instead of making attempt to name and shame the young man, you should be grateful to him for giving you what you greatly desires but solely lacks.

The message you uploaded as a proof of evidence, apparently vindicates the young, shows him as someone in fine control of his senses, and reveals an acute, deepseated psychological ailment of yours that requires urgent medical attention.

Alternatively, and If I were you, I will hire young men to be saying this word "beautiful" to me morning, afternoon, and night, because it serves as one of the remedies to your problem.

TemmyT002:
This sounds like sarcasm.

Whoa! Here comes someone who is able to read between the lines and discover the sarcasm embedded in my post. I am not surprised that a lot of people completely misconstrue the meaning I intend to convey, since everyone is only eager to make a comment after reading it. But Temmy, your insight is amazing, even though you weren't fully convinced on the message the post intends to convey.

Truly, it doesn't only sound like sarcasm, it is indeed sarcasm.

Dreyton36:
Stop being unintelligent , not everyone who sends you a mail wants your body
That's how most of you girls end up loosing something precious
Or do you think it's every nairalander that's jobless?

What if they've got some vital information or maybe it's someone who knows you and wants to reconnect with you ?

Use ur head for what it's meant for , at least reply their mails if you can , then hear them out , if it's about romance you'll ignore and if it's not then you still hear them out

Very simple ideology


Lights up my kpoli in peace

Sometime ago, a male member disguised as a female in other to know what females experience here just because of their gender. His discoveries were mindblowing, and showed that majority of male that "attacked" ladies here do so because they intend to her notice them. Pathetic? I think so.Therefore, if any male member has vital information he wishes to pass across to a female member, it is proper he informs her first before sending PM to her. I will write it for the umpteenth time, a lot male folks are shameless, doubletalk, and are crass opportunists.

In this case, she has verifiable evidence to buttress their claims. We should bow our heads in shame, instead of defending what is indefensible.

This Oga is not a good ambassador of our club. How could you turn your wife into a punching bag when you are not in the ring, and she is not an opponent. It is clear you haven't been attending meetings regularly, or that you did not pay heed to the teachings and read all materials provided for us. I don't see how you will escape unscathed when madam is armed with pictorial and videographic evidence.

Doc, this is real shitshow and we don't condone any kind of abuse. So know that we are with you in this one. Someone's job is on the line, as the television station would do everything it could to disassociate with itself from this wife beater.

The authorship of this post, together with its contents, is subject to investigation. How could one commit gender-murder so effortlessly? Well, I will certainly spoil your little fun party: all things you emitted about Nigerian women are not only figment of your imagination, they don't represent them. Why do you think Nigerian women are in high demand in international dating arena? It precisely because Nigerian men have failed to value what they have, and are condemned to lose it to external competitors.

For your information, Nigerian women are down-to-earth, polished, and sensible; it is the Nigerian men that doesn't understand them. Therefore, your charges against them are null and void and have effect. It is only a resident of another that will make such wide and wolly remarks about Nigerian women. Has it ever cross your mind that almost all the challenges and problems Nigerian women face are caused by men, who are compulsively selfish, egoistic, calculating, and dense.

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It worries me so much that you didn't see where/how you have wronged the family and their reason (s) for being hostile towards you. First, you got their pregnant and this act brings shame to the family. Second, you took her away from the family and didn't see how such act paints in you bad light. The claim that she was being maltreated, locked up is balderdash; a ruse to justify your questionable, ungentleman behaviour.

The major giveaway in your ordeal is the fact that you have successfully convinced yourself that you are the victim, when obviously you are not. When it suits you, you realise that the girl is an adult who has the right to do whatever she wants. But when it doesn't, you cast yourself in a helpless, fragile persona, starts complaining, looking for scapegoats. Now that you are penniless and the family isn't favourably disposed to you due to your attitude when you have "something," you are here looking an underserved sympathy.

Well, since you have increased your tally as a prolific striker that you are, you have to come clean, apologise, and peace with the family. That is the appropriate way to make amend.

The title of this thread appears to be misleading, because there is no evidence of "family wahala" in it. Instead what I see is an insensate masochist with an exuberant taste for self-violence (apologies to China Achebe), eager to destroy his home. I don't believe you have a selfless reason to assist your ex. And even if there is a modicum of altruism in your determined quest to reestablish with her, your wife's objection, even though it seems a bit harsh and unsettling, should be respected.

To add to what some people have written, would you countenance a scenario where your wife reestablishes with one of her exes, and is scheming on giving him financial assistance? Even if your answer is affirmative, it does not void her concerns. If you can't convince her on why assisting is necessary, back off immediately.

The tale you narrated clearly shows a family in disarray, broken, and disunited. How could your father refuse to have anything to do with the money, yet received it from his in-laws? If your dad were in control of his family, he would have returned the money as it is the prevailing practice in most parts of Igbo land today. And what the heck is the pastor doing in an issue that is completely a cultural, family affair?

For you, opening a thread just to vent and lament that your cut from the bride price is insignificant, shows you are neither a cultured nor sensible person. You can't use paying rents, living alone, and struggling as a young man to conceal your lack of tact and pathetic sense of entitlement. If you want to spend bride price money as you wish, get marry, procreate female children, and demand hefty amounts from your sons-in-law. You should be happy that you were given some part of the money, instead idly whining and giving away some unpleasant details of yourself and your family.

It won't take up to ten years before this little bimbo realises the futility of her self-destructive decision to marry her great-grand father's age mate just because of his ephemeral material possessions. Her case is further compounded because her Asaba culture precludes any form of extramarital adventure. It is not wide or out of place to assume that since uncle has started talking about adding to his harem, another starry-eyed, impressionable bimbo has fallen into his net. Regina was an actress before she got married to the billionaire; yet she was so poor. She was diagnosed, discovered to be suffering "poverty of the mind or intellect" in my clinic.

This kind of Regina's ailment equally afflicts our young chaps who, having crossed the Atlantic ocean and eager to secure their places which will translate or at least guarantee a better standard of living, decide to marry women far, far older than their great-grand mothers.

Finally, this man has no respect for his little trophy wife. Imagine! You mean it took just few weeks for her to fall in love with your money? OGA, please stop washing her dirty linen in public.

Another failed attempt to hoodwink men with a shaky, fautly, and non-convincing theory. Men don't need women to lecture us on how to show love to our mothers, wivies, etc. No matter how you bleat about it, majority of men will continue to choose their mothers over their wives. It is not based on some pedestrian, hocus-pocus tales as you have already convinced yourself, it is based on lived experience, sacrifices, and undiluted affections, which majority of wivies are not capable of giving to their husbands.

Note that it doesn't portray you as an intelligent person if you use your family experience to extrapolate on what happens or happened in other families. The claim that the male child internalises the suffering endured by their mothers and tend to "compensate" them when they become adults is as subjective as it is disturbing. This is the sort of junk narrowminded daughters-in-law feed themselves with to provide the much-needed platform to carryout "war" on their mothers-in-law. What majority of mothers do - which does not including enduring ugly and unpleasant treatments from their husbands - is to sacrifice their pleasure and focus completely on the wellbeing of their children.

A wife can be good, loving, and adorable and becomes a recipient of an undying love from their husband. That is just great. But when a mother has given her all to her children, it is unjust to rank or measure her with someone who might look the other way if some, or all her boxes, were not ticked.

Karleb:
This might be a bit insensitive but I had a laugh when you said he moved your matrimonial bed.

Bed is bed, matrimonial bed is a metaphor.

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Are you saying you don't want to divorce this man?

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On a serious note, how can a lady insist on staying in Ibadan while her husband is staying in Lagos.

The degree she's taking about is a part time program, I presume.

It becomes embarrassing and shameful for a man who has a house in Lagos to always go to Ibadan every now and then to meet his wife. Why can't the wife be the one going over to his place? Men have ego.

It's not as if Lagos to Ibadan is even that far.


Not in any way saying the man is right though.

The word "Matrimonial Bed" isn't a metaphor as you erroneously implied. And yes, the concept of matrimonial bed has sociolinguistic significance because it differentiates the bed husband and wife sleep on with other bed(s) in the house. So between husband and wife, a bed isn't just a bed.

Not subscribing to this story as presented by a party, but it is expected that a man -- and, of course, a woman -- should ordinarily endure any inconveniences arising from his wife's academic pursuit away from home. The claim that "men have ego" as a reason for being insensitive and stupid is an affront to commonsense.

angelEmade:
lol clout chaser, without joining issues insultingly, without prejudice, your burrowed brain should be able to patronize the foregoing without animosity.
How come a weakling like you, with false speech prowess camouflage is staging a language sabotage?
ordinarily your brains should tell you the satirical difference between a jargon infested speech and a grammatical eyesore.
But albeit the bashing, I bet you do not at all, understand that jargons are in fact well accepted in English communications. Rather than betray the literature, they are enunciation of meanings.
The multiple-stupidity that landed you in this jeopardy has betrayed you...my! how can you bring your moronic misconstrued ideal into a well meaning reply I gave to someone??
you should learn...
not just to speak the language
but to understand the language

I read this post of yours twice and I can't stop laughing at the wasted effort exerted just to sound or appear "learned." If being proficient in English language is something you desire, dude, you have awfully lot of grounds to cover. It is not about throwing vocabularies in disjointed sentences that doesn't convey meaning; it is not about being verbose, especially where simple, direct, and unambiguous words are necessary. It is about achieving clarity, being direct, and communicative when writing or speak. Let me quickly point out some words or phrases that have no business in your post, or that were used wrongly.
"Your burrowed brain," "to patronise," etc. there was a terrible misuse of these words: satirical, "brains" "betray," and "jargon" in the post. And what the heck does this phrase mean: "... with false speech prowess camouflage?" Above all, you showed a poor understanding of the role of punctuations in English language.

However, you have potentials to become a swordsmith, but you need to be less verbose, and always stick to the rules and conventions of the language.

[quote author=pozehnani post=96063698]Nothing is wrong with me. You don't have good sense of humour at all. Oya show me who you are.

pozehnani:
Im at Akoka yaba.

Yeah, you mean Yaba left. Don't worry, we all know your location.

Mummiesgirls4:
I ave already given my life to Christ if I didn’t I wouldn’t be alive to tell my story . Ave decided not to tell him anything for now first I need to start up something , get my own place then I will try to tell him the truth for now I would rather kip quiet and enjoy the relationship. Thanks for the advice

Yeah, sure. If after having four children from different men, you haven't given your life to Christ, I wonder who you would have given it to. You know, Jesus Christ is like a jump site that joyously receives us in our low and battered moments. He never casts us away, always drawing us to Himself. However, is "keeping quiet and enjoying the relationship" part of the tastelessly showy and gratuitous exhibition of giving your life to Christ?

felixjet:
you should try to understand what you read before commenting. there was a full stop before 'due to marriage'.
some of her friends got married or relocated, she wasn't referring to herself.

Oga, your "full stop" theory means nothing because that phrase is laden with ambiguity. That is why we demand clarity from students when writing, becase your reader does not know what thoughts are running through your mind. In any case, that phrase can be swung to àny direction, according to the understanding of the reader. Perhaps it is one of the symptoms of not having a female friend for a long time due to "marriage" and "relocation."

[quote author=Trayceey post=95998838]which side is your area?[/quote

pozehnani:
By "taking" I meant taking them on a part-time subject as a part time teacher. Not taking a course there as a student receiving lectures.

Hmm.. talking about moving on as a result of breach in contract agreement in our country sometimes can be relative because most coy breach agreements but due to lack of job opportunities, employees just keep managing them like that. Reason it looks like I wanna give them a second chance.

Another thing I think it's the reason she's not forthcoming with the bal is Her daughter who is one of the board of trustees. She always objects to whatever I try to do or counteract it but the mother likes me and always steps in each time things get out of hand. So I'm suspecting she's the one telling them at the meetings not to go by my own terms and conditions. She doesn't like my guts and already said it during one of our arguments that I like showing myself all the time. Huh..

I know admitting you erred will be very difficult for someone who thinks she is smart and intelligent.

Is this not the same woman you had misunderstanding resulting from book payment? Now that you have an insider adversary, who seems to influence the board, you have your battle cutout. But since you are willing to stake it, knowing fully well what awaits you, you will need a lot of good luck. I like the way you comfortably brush off the impact it would have on you, providing a service and at the time not sure if you are gonna receive your pay. Won't the students be the ultimate losers? God help us!

You must be a student of that school for "taking for three years." Well, if this phrase means you were once a teacher of that school, then you had taught for three years. In Nigeria, it is common to hear teachers and students call the basic thing they do within the parameters of a school as "taking." Well, the proper rendering is this: school/faculty/department offers a course, the teacher/lecturer teaches a course, and the student takes/does a course.

What connects you to that school and which forms the basis of your contract, is finance, after you have supposedly carry out your obligations. When there is a breach of this contract on their part, you know it is time to move on.

When will these bimbos learn to understand that movies are not real and majority of the actors and actress struggle to maintain stable relationship behind rolling cameras? Therefore, it is simply idiotic to base your life on the scripted, lovey-dovey scenes of a movie. I remember as a kid, after watching any of the American action movie, we hit the street, intent on replicating what we just watched or seen. But as we became adult, truly, we unlearned this habit. When will you unlearn yours? At 35, 40, 50?

In any case, it appears that as Nigerian ladies become older, the more they act and behave like kids. While it is expected that a semblance of maturity should accompany age, our ladies, unfortunately, have shred the validity of this notion to pieces.

At the end of the day and no matter how we carry ourselves on an anonymous online platform, we can never escape from reality, no matter the amount of romantic movies we watch. This is because reality is always cold and indifferent.

There is no reasonable proof that supports this assertion. It is completely evidence-free. We should focus on character trait, personality, peer pressure, etc. as possible reason. This conclusion is akin to the wrongheaded notion which states that house chore is the reason many married woman starve their husbands sex. On the surface, it seems to be convincing, but when it is thoroughly examined, the disjunctions become apparent.