₦airaland Forum

I am really sorry about the upbringing of most folks here; I read your story and I can't help but thank heavens for giving me the kind of parents I have.

My dad is more than Superman, like he figuratively carried the whole family on his shoulders while my mom did her job taking care of us.
The only thing I don't really like about my dad is that he adores my mother too much, like everything she says is right, no matter how we try to convince him we(my siblings and I) are right. My mom has all my dad's mumu button but it truly served us well o especially when it came to finance, my mom knows how to make good decisions.

Ever since my mom "found Christ" , I didn't found it funny. She's against all my friends, especially the females. I didn't know how to approach a girl till I turned 18-19 (with memorized lines). She killed my social status. She has embarrassed me many times around female friends because she thinks the devil sent them to destroy he son's destiny just like how Delilah was sent to destroy Samson's. Seriously, religion really turned (not brainwashed) her to something else but that was then.....but man got his status back immediately he got into the university.

This lockdown has made me focus on the issues I have with my laptop; Up almost all morning 12-7am for two days straight, trying to cleanse my system with Malware and Spyware softwares. Scared of formatting my system and losing my files but wetin man go do

Watching YouTube tutorials and other educational and entertainment channels....yes, even self-defense tutorials on YouTube.

Taking my time to wash my bathroom and toilet, keep my place in order

Idleness has started to make me remember and think about my past relationships....fvck!

But the best of it all is that; I sit down for hours trying to picture that perfect life I want, think and plan what needs to be done to achieve it.

My only regret is that I didn't buy any game console before this lockdown. I am just bored playing Soocer games on my PC and since my PC is not a high end one, there are no badass First person shooter games to install. Can anyone recommend one.
System spec: 4gb RAM,
Processor: AMD E2-1800, Radeon. Graphics 1.70Ghz.
System type: 64-bit, Windows OS

AndroBlaze:
I've not watched John Wick, but none of the other people you mentioned have a scouse accent, Chris is even Australian, though he does attempt to do a southern English accent in some movies.

My bad, I didn't delete what I wanted to post initially. I was gonna say I hate the scouse accent because they sound Scottish and Irish mixed together but I consider the standard British accent the sexiest; I love the way Idris Elba, Jason Statham and that man in John Wick speak. I also hate the way most ghetto black British speak, you know, that "grime rap" accent (Skepta and Stormzy).

So Chris is Australian?! Very difficult to tell British from Australian accent

I wonder how AY would feel if he is a Nairalander; see how folks shifted the main topic of discussion to "Accents of Nigerians in diaspora";-D

Well to me, I have no problem if you try to switch your accent when communicating with Brits or Americans but as a typical naija guy or babe, if you try to switch it when we are having a discussing, it is a big turn off for me. There's a big difference between using the right pronunciation and faking your accent it totally.

But I just love the British accent; I consider the scouse accent the sexiest, just like that Ammunition expert in John Wick: Chapter II, Alfred The Butler in Batman, Idris Elba, Jason Statham, Chris Hemsworth and many more

Experts/Experienced folks in the house should please respond to this. I am also in same situation here.

I need to know the "Things to know before purchase". I want to get nine at Alaba Market, Lagos

Hello here. I am a novice when it comes to game consoles. Please, what is hacked or jailbreak console? I am planning on getting a ps3 console and I have no idea about these terms.

Another thing is, I need games pre-installed I.e the one that do not use game CD plates but can be downloaded with HDD of at least 350gb that can contain at least 10-15 games, because the main games I need are
Uncharted(1-3)
Last of Us
Fifa(any year from 2017-2020)
COD(blacks ops2 or Modern Warfare)
Battlefield IV
God of War (ascension or III)
Crysis
Assassin's Creed(any)
Dark Souls
Metal Gun Solid IV

Kenturkey048:
A babe once called her boyfriend to wish him happy birthday naked inside my room the same boyfriend she picked his call to say "call me back am on a bike " while she was di*k riding me....

Damn,brah! Indeed she was on a bike
Were you guys dating or she was just there to satisfy each other's urge
#Smh.

I just work with my guts and it has never failed me.

One even cheated on her bf with me. I guess I blew her mind away and she fell helplessly in love with me. She tried to justify herself saying she didn't sleep with me but we had all kind of 'play' except penetration. I told her, once you have started conceiving the thought of another guy in you, especially sexually, you have in fact cheated on your bf, don't gimme that bs.

Guys, never do long distance relationship, for your own good. I cannot vouch for every female out there but with the ones I have seen and witnessed, please do not, I repeat, do not!!

Some of you will call your boo immediately after she just finished blowing a guy, and you will be smiling and talking lovey-dovey BS

Honeydenz:
We both cheated on each other.

Most Guys are fund of one bad thing, and that is sharing their partners bedroom matters with their fellow guys. I had this guy in school, lives in same hostel. He had a fancy room, I was watching "Merlin" on his plasma TV not knowing its already 12 midnight. He came touching, romance followed then d real thing. It continued for a months until his friend came around to visit him.
He narrated all our sex escapades to his friend, describing me as a LovePeddler and worst, his friend seek his permission to have his share and he granted it, unknown to him I was drying my washed clothes closed to his window so I heard all their discussion loud and clear. I was really hurt. But I decided to make him feel the pains I felt.
Before days the foolish friend came to my room, acting friendly, I played along. First, I stopped my boyfriend from having access to my body totally, when he noticed I now more closer to his friend he even became jealous. I allowed the friend sex me, and make sure he inform his friend as well, this shattered his ego and before long nigga became so thin.

Note: all these while I was still cooking his meals, I could have decided to poison him if I wanted to, most guys think they are smart, but they aren't.

• First, you said it started with touches then the real deal happened and it went on for months. From the way you described it, It looks like you guys just had casual sex for months, so you weren't really dating.

•No matter how childish a guy is, he can never refer to a girl he calls girlfriend as a LovePeddler. He probably saw you as a dick cleansing tool (No offense). So, that brings us back to the first issue here. it was just casual sexing.

•When you opened a thread concerning this similar case, you clearly stated you did not sleep with the so-called friend but here you opened up about sleeping with his friend.

I am not in any way trying to slut-shame you but your story isn't straight here, though I like your "bravery" in coming out but to be frank, you shouldn't have given too much details here - Nigerian guys can be so judgmental

sweetguy10:
You can self teach yourself or go to any of the information tech training institutes in the country(which is better as you will have a coding tutor to help put you through some loopholes -no pun intended ) . The language of choice depends on what aspect of IT you want to go into .. If you're interested in mobile dev , I'll advice you learn Kotlin or Java , Data analysis/science - Python , Web dev - Php, Visual basic, Software development - Java , game dev - C#/C ..... Java cuts across lots of platform though and it has lots of libraries . Lots of corporations use Java for their back-end functionality too so you'll be readily needed.

Good one, brother but permit to say this, VB is virtually a dead PL. It is on a fast decline as of 2019/2020, you can check it out yourself.

Another thing is to ask him if he has a resilient spirit because programming is very very frustrating. In fact, I just took a break because my my head is hot right now due to a little frustration from a lesson.
Advice him to learn Python or JavaScript. Those are the languages in high demand right now and clients are paying big bucks for it.
Once again, congratulations on what you have done so far. Cheers!

If only I could knock the fvcking teeth outta this guy's mouth. What da fvck, dude?!
How can you bring yourself down so low to this. Lord knows as I am typing this, she probably just came out of the shower to wash off the cum shots of another guy on her face and body.

Never take a woman as your priority no matter how much you love her, just show her 48%-55% of love.

When my ex started acting funny and I tried to find out why, but it always ended up with either quarrels or more quarrels. I just went ghost mode on her and that was it. She was shocked when she asked me where the relationship was heading after so many quarrels and silent treament, and I told her calmly that I have moved on, she should do same as well. The shock in her eyes could bring back a person who is in coma

I have always maintained my words "Never apologise if you are not wrong".

She's in her "whoring stage"; let her be and gently leave with the 0.5% dignity you have left.

I was quite a roughian back in primary school but I was totally touched by an angel because I completely changed when I got into secondary secondary school, probably because it is a military school.
I remember pushing a girl due to frustration and she staggered, tripped, fell and hit her head hard on the wall and passed out. The girl didn't say anything but her silly friend snitched on me. I got the beating of my life that day. What made it worse was the fact that the man asked for my name and he found out my cousin who graduated few years back was a bone in his neck. He decided to take it out on me....again

I told the girl who snitched on me that I'd haunt her where'er she went for the rest of her life. She went again to report me, I got another round of serious beating. This time, the class threatened the girl, she went to report again and we were warned not to touch her else they'd all get same punishment that was given to me.

Another risk I took was when my then school gf took me to an empty class during NECO exams for me to do the unthinkable. I did the little I could do but my mind wasn't where her body was because the thought of being caught by a soldier or teacher wasn't worth the 10mins of pleasure. I couldn't risk it any more, and decided to stop, told her to button up properly and let us leave. She was disappointed and probably the reason she lost that burning desire for me.

Mymynd4u:
At this ur age, u still playing game... Hiannnnn,

#smiles. I like to unwind after a stressed out day, and mobile game is the answer. How old do you think I am?

henry007:
Yes

I have been getting a lot of buzz about that game. Is it on play store? If yes, what are the conditions for getting it? I am an FPS fan

More interested in that game you are playing, mate. What is the name? Is it PUBG?

Those rogues are something else. This is why I am scared to building a house in Lagos/Ogun state. Imagine budgeting 5million for a 4-5 bedroom bungalow but end up paying more than that because of these children of the under world.

It has become so bad that it is now seen as a norm. A certain man was chased out of his land because he called the police on them and he was threatened to be killed if he ever came near his land. That was how the house was re-sold to another woman.

Goooooaaaaaalllll!!! Nice assist from Ederson

See what Aguero did to 80million Maguire. This is the first Man Utd's game I am watching since God-knows-when and now they are giving me more reason to just leave and forget them.

I don't want to mock any body but a man of God once asked me why I didn't come for their Sunday service. My response was about body aches due to the strenuous exercise I partook in, the previous day, he said I should come to the church for prayers because it is spiritual and I was like WTF, dude! I over-worked my body through exercise and nature is telling on me and you are saying it is spiritual.

These days, the way we Nigerians handle religious matter and the way the West handle theirs; I am beginning to lose interest at a very very fast pace

EbukaHades10:
Osun people, identify

Bro, Osun is a fine state with good roads, except for few old buildings here and there but light is almost 24hrs, especially in Osogbo.
If you would like to remain in Osun after camp, try to join the OBS (Orientation Broadcasting Service) and there is about 90% chance of being posted to Osogbo, the state capital, especially if you are hard working.
Good luck to you, sir

Budline1:
I talk to fine girls a lot but their pride no be for here, I can't put up with it. Eventhough man isn't lazy, I'm doing good on my own. Fvck naija fine girls (Especially those ones with big ass or fine face, too much pride).

My last two relationships ended because the only thing they have to offer is their body and fine face. Pride was another thing; we will both be waiting for who to first apologise. Since we are both getting attention from the opposite sex, the relationship dies a natural death with no reason at all.

Almost everyone is handsome I have come to discover most of you guys that keep saying you are cute but no girl and blah blah blah are just bunch of average looking guys with 'good guys' mentality and remember what they say about "good guys" or you are probably a loudmouth which is a total turn off for most female.

I have seen a very fine guy literally begging a girl to date him. I later got to discover the 'boy' is a loudmouthed fellow with anger issues.

All in all, most fine boys are broke or dumb or even both because they are lazy and have nothing else to rely on except their cute face

God, I still don't know how Rema came into limelight. Well, it is the craft of DonJazzy and many simpleton living in Nigeria accepting it.
I went to the story to get something and the song "Lady" by Rema was playing. The attendant was even singing along.
Please what is "Make I chook your socket, money dey my pocket". Or " Amaka body sweet pass Eba, Amaka wan turn me to epka, Shana wole to oti e ewa oo" or whatever gibberish he mumbled there.....

This OP is a lazy writer; You topic is captivating but your content is wack. Talk about irony

I am 200% sure someone will quote the whole post, just to put one or two lines of reply, just wait and..... I never even type finish sef.
I don't know what people gain when they quote the whole post for Pete's sake. I am so tempted to curse this fellow right now

chuks34:
Bro pls what is Okafor's law cos I have one ex like that

It means to keep getting the cookie from your ex even if she's a new relationship or not. Most times, guys end up falling back in love though, which is a bad thing.
Most times it happens because she's not yet over you or the new dude isn't as good as you or she's just hot most of the time and you are the best man for the job.
I wish you success on this conquest journey of yours

What tha fvck did i just read?!
Is this guy for serious or he just felt like writing a fictional story. With all due respect, brother simp, your girl is a whorë. She literally and clearly showed you all the signs yet you foolíshly still lamenting you love her. Gaddammit!
Martinez, Ubunja get in here please!!

The only reason you should go back to your ex is to practice Okafors's Law with the strings cut off

It was on a Saturday morning after clean up and breakfast, my mom came to our room (My older bro and I shared a room). She saw my wallet on the table and jokingly asked how many million was in my wallet and she opened in and found condom inside. How could I have forgotten. Funny part is, I was yet to have sex, I just took one from my brother who was very active. She just closed it and quietly left. Ladies and Gentlemen, Two days later, I got the preaching of my life. I swear, I'd have preferred to be flogged instead of listening to her talk about sin and youths indulging in fornication.

Second time was when I was in the living room, watching this movie "Notorious" (Movie biography of Notorious BIG). I was watching where Biggie was being F'd by Lil Kim and was so carried away that I didn't notice her standing few meters away from the TV and then she called out my name......Well, let the embarrassment stay where it is, I don't have strength abeg

That walkman CD player and palito got me laughing real hard. I remember that Wyclef's Album whenever I "steal" my big brother's walkman. You have to hold it upright in its flat position,else it will start "skipping".
I remember those dudes asking my sister out; they will send me to give her the usual val card, chocolate and teddy bear with N20, N50 for " transport" as per my own fee for co-operating.

I used that same money to buy Palito. I remember buying it N100.

Damn! I am just typing and smiling

Dam, brah! Your girl left you in her room for hours, and she wasn't even in maybe a girlfriend's room but in another dude's, who probably has licked her sore. That level of disrespect fvckery is totally not acceptable . I wouldn't even inform her I am leaving, and God knows it will take a week before I'll consider picking her call.
Bro, you are an idíot, yes, you are. You have to learn how to put a girl in order. She doesn't even need to cheat on you before you handle her well.

One time, back when I was in school, my girl ran into a male friend who asked her out long ago but she refused to date him. I just shook hands with the guy and walked a few distance to give them space, but she spent more than 5mins talking with this dude, na so I give am one look, waka dey go. Omo, na so she cut conversation with the guy, begin run after me. I didn't say a word to her that day but this girl begged and kept on apologising for more than 30mins. I warned her never to try such nonsense again. That night she cooked me my favourite meal and topped it off with.....later that night before I finally accepted.
I am not perfect but one thing is for sure when it comes to the opposite sex, no matter how I love her, I'll never allow her to disrespect me.

You know, I just realised, in all my years of dating I am yet to celebrate valentine's day with my partner physically. It i s either one of us travels or it ends before February. Sheesh!

I may agree with number 1 and 3 but that number 2, I am not really sure.
I know a girl who was being chased by some guys but never gave in to any of them but when she met me, I can boastfully say I blew her mind away. The chemistry was just there, and at a point I thought to myself, this is too good to be true but the truth actually is, there is something she found totally different and interesting in me. So the truth is, a girl who truly likes/loves you will be cheap only to you

If your girl is the type that is always posting her pictures on WhatsApp or other social media platforms, disturbing the whole place with only her pictures or with those stupid videos of her turning her head to different directions saying nothing or probably lip synching to a particular music, my brother run. Those are the ones between 18-24

ArticleBeast:
And you tolerated...?

Tolerated what exactly?