Confess to your husband before your sister spills the secret to him.

Face the consequence once and for all.

Dear brother, I really feel your pain and I wish and hope that you may find an effective and lasting solution to your problem. You have poured out your heart here. I will urge you to keep seeking help as much as you can. Do not keep quite, if not, you will die in silence while she will keep living life to the fullest.
Also, I advice that the two of you should seek counselling as soon as possible. The matter is already beyond what the two of you can fix from what you presented here.

Discuss with your wife about the need for both of you to see a marriage counsellor. When you make this proposal, she may or may not accept to go. If she accepts to seek counselling with you, then, she still wants your marriage to work. But, if she refuses to join you for counselling or she grudgingly accepts after much persuassion, the implication might largely be that she is no longer interested in staying married to you.

I have made some deductions from what you stated here. From what I infered, sex is at the core of the problem between the two of you. I mean to say that the two of you may not be sexually compatible.
If you both had engaged in it prior to tying the knot, the likelihood is that she would not have proceeded with the marriage. She would have opted out by giving you one excuse or the other.

I am not saying that abstinence before wedding is not good. I equally preach same but from my experience and what I have read about couples complaints, sexual performance or sexual incompatibility is usually a big source of problem for so many. By the time they get into the marriage without trying it out, they end up having issues and they start living like strangers.
It is probable that your wife had expected awesome sexual performances from you after marriage, but you have not been able to give her that mind blowing sexual experience that she expected. Women usually have crazy sexual fantasies.

I am actually appalled that this problem started pretty early, just a few months after your wedding. Please tell me, which newly married lady would suddenly withdraw from engaging in sexual activities with her husband barely four months after wedding? Whenever you get her to allow you climb her, she does not allow you kiss her or warm up to her as expected. She is simply detached from you emotionally and she is only living with you because she is tied down by wedding vows. She no longer has any feelings for you. It is very obvious.

I want to believe that your wife actually knows what the problem is but she is keeping it to herself. She does not want to open up to you.
Recall that she once told you that she denys you sex because you were not romanctic enough. You changed and enhanced your romantic game. She then said that you were not helping out with the house chores. You agreed to always help out the much you can, yet, she has persisted with denying you sex. She actually knows why she is punishing you for no reason.

I will appreciate it so much if she can come out straight and bare her mind to you. This will help you both decide whether to keep seeking lasting solution or end it amicably.
It is actually confusing to hear that she always wants you to pray with her morning and night. She reads the Bible regurlarly but would avoid any sex related discussions including the Biblical injunctions to couples. She is disconnected from you, yet, she wants you both to engage in other couple activities. It does not work that way. A man who is sex starved by his wife will not do such things. That's the way men are configured.

You said that she usually attains orgasm whenever you penetrate her. Hnm, it is also probable that she fakes it. Trust women in this game of faking orgasm.
Were you doing enough pre-intimacy before intercourse? A longer pre-intimacy would give room for her body to be prepared for the penetraion. But if you normally fire your shots even before she gets ready, she will just pretend and fake orgasm. Four months and she withdrew from having sex with you? Bros, review your sex game. I am not critiscing you. I am only offering suggestions that may help you nail this issue.

If she would allow you, give her massage one of these days. You may not neccessarily have sex unless you have driven her to that threshold where she would be begging you to ride her. Just offer to massage her. Buy massage oil and get to work. If you do not know how to do it, YouTube is there to help you. No woman hates good sex especially when the man is very good at it.

While you are trying out these solutions, do not stop seeking the face of God for help. If every other thing fails, God will not fail you. I pray that you may win back your wife and continue living happily.

Good luck!!!

delishpot:


Seems the routes changed due to corona virus wahala plus the ones that don't need transit visas are not having space as the date he plans to fly is so close seems they are fully booked within the days he wants to fly. Na to extend his visa sure pass as it stands.

If he is not in a hurry to come back to Nigeria, let him extend his VISA.
Then, he should carefully search the flight schedules of these airlines that do not need transit VISA through January.
Good luck to him.

If he is unable to leave China before his VISA expires, he can approach his school to help him get his VISA extended for 60days only. There are 2 options here, the police or immigration. Within this period, he should arrange for his exit.

As for the airlines, what happened to Ethiopia Airways, Kenya, Rwanda, Qatar, Turkish, Etihad? These airlines do not need transit VISA for Nigerians.

She is simply not interested in you.
Check the next available girl...

You don't need to breakup with her.
If you love her as you claim, this is the time to demonstrate it.

Take her to deliverance sessions. Follow up on it. Don't lose a good woman because she is possessed.

Be the instrument for her deliverance and liberation. Go and read the biblical story of Tobias and Sarah in the book of Tobit. It's the first book in the Apocrypha.

If you will not put anything inside the envelop, do not collect it.

What would you say about people who studied philosophy? Very argumentative, right?

It may not be generalized, but they know something an average person may not know.

If you were asking how you can make money online and become financially independent, I would encourage you the more.
Set your mind on the more important things.

Ask Google to help you with a clue on your question...

May work on some wives.
Some may reciprocate with equal measure.

This one na marketing manager abi product manager.
Well done, we have seen your goods and taken note of your services.

waywardpikin:


Even in a relationship, you have to put yourself first and be observant so that you will know when to cut your losses and bail. With women the tides are always changing.

No be lie. They have been dealing with men from time immemorial and they will continue to deal with men till forever.

Do you care to talk to someone?
Kindly send me an email of your contact details.
You don't have to do this.
What exactly is the issue?

Her efforts are highly commendable.
This is a family business which she either inherited or perhaps, helping out with to make ends meet.

When a girl shows lack of commitment to your once lively relationship, tread softly. It's either she is getting unto a new guy or she is emotionally disconnected momentarily from you.

You did what you did to save yourself from heartache, no ill feelings.
You may as well end it formally so that you will stop feeling bad each time she calls you.

She is very good at what she does

What you had with her was never defined. So, she never saw you as a boyfriend. You were just FWB partners.

Always define anything you have with a girl. They don't reason the way we reason...

OP, you have not responded to any of the comments dropped for you. But let me assume that you are reading and assimilating all the comments as they drop. It is very heart-breaking and quite pathetic that a young married couple would be facing such challenge as this.

There are a few things we need to examine in this case. You did not give us all the details we need to help us make better inputs. Kindly answer the following questions:

* At what point did you notice your wife's aversion to sex? Before marriage, immediately after marriage, or after child birth?
* Did you ever engage in pre-marital sex with her? What was her attitude towards sex with you then? Was she very receptive of it? Did she crave for the moments to have sex with you then? Some red flags are usually given right before marriage but most people ignore it.
If you can provide answers to the above questions, it may help you get a clue as to where the problem started.

* Were you the first pesron that deflowered your wife or she had another boyfriend before you came along? If she had tasted sex with an ex and it felt better than what you offer her, it could be a possible cause for her attitude presently.
So, what is your game like in terms of sex? Top notch, average or wack? Rate yourself accordingly.
* Has she ever demanded that you perform some sex styles on her which you turned down? Do you even know her sexual fantasies? What turns her on? How does she want you to handle her? Did she at any point ask for head and some other stuffs and you declined?

You mentioned that she asked you to approach your maid and let your steam off with her. Was she serious about this recommendation or was it just something she did in passing? Since it has gotten to this point of she recommending your maid to you, don't you think that she may have lost every sexual attraction she once had for you?
Now this brings me to the point of how you even got married in the first place. Were you the one who found her or was it an arranged marriage? I mean to say if you guys were recommended to each other by family or friends. Did you date her at all and for how long? Dating here is not courtship. I mean did you have a relationship with her before marriage? Did you marry her under pressure? I mean, did her parents force her into marriage? Was she with another guy before her parents forced her to marry you or did you coerce her into marrying you when she had not fully made up her mind? Did she agree to marry you just because you were ready and willing to settle down? Some girls jump into marriage with any willing and ready man only to start resenting the man after the marriage. People should understand that it is not just about who you marry but it is also about the reason you got married. Do not get married if you are not mentally prepared for it.

You said that she no longer cooks for you. This one makes me think that the problem is deeper than what you expect. It is not just about denying you sex but she may no longer be interested in you as her husband. Tell me what a married woman is meant to be doing in her home as a wife if she won't give her husband sex and she won't cook for him. It all means that she has no more regard for the man.

On the other hand, you may have to approach this issue spiritually after you have examined all the above points I outlined carefully. You need to know that life is spirtual and that whatever we see physically is just a resultant manifestation of the things that have happened in the spirit.
I want to write more but let me stop here. If you need further discussions, I am always available.
Peace be with you.

Here is the opportunity you have been looking for to make money right from the comfort of your home.

Create contents that teach people how to just about any thing. People who need them will rush to pay you. You can earn between $100-$200 weekly.

Checkout the first link on my signature and thank me later.

Osedagal:


I am here

Watch that video on the second link on my signature and decide if you can do something like that.

Making money online is easy if you understand how.
If you are willing to invest on 'make money knowledge', then come with me...

Okten:

Okay, thank you sir.
But I heard that you can't publish your book on another site after using kdp select.
What if I decide to unpublish it later and use kdp only, will they allow it?

KDP policy is that if you submit your book, you must not upload it elsewhere till after 90 days.
After the 90 days elapses, you can remove it from KDP and submit elsewhere. Publish Drive advises that you wait for at least 2 weeks after withdrawing your book from Amazon KDP before you can upload it elsewhere.

Okten:

I want to publish my books on kindle, do you think I should use kdp select option?

KDP Select is a good place to from.

Okten:
If I sell my book for 7000 naira on Amazon, how much will they give me for each sale?

It may be 70% for you and 30% for them.

Okten:
Do I have to pay so that I can publish my book on publishDrive?

Yes, there is a subscription fee of $9.99 monthly.
So, whether you make sales or not, you must pay.
I don't like this arrangement.
Other platforms don't charge monthly subscription. Rather, they collect percentage commission from each sale.

Amazon is definitely better but Publishdrive can distribute to so many other stores around the world.
You can go to KDP for three months or more. When you think you have made reasonable amount of money, you can go to Publishdrive.

Paperback=hardcopy
Kindle=softcopy

Design the App first and put it out for Beta testing.
Seeing is believing...

How will you ensure the safety and security of the visitors?

A wise man once said that people do not defecate where they work or where they eat from.

At 24, your are still young to be desperate for marriage. Most persons who got married very early wish they can leave their partners for someone they presume to be better.

In any case, 5 years is more than enough for your guy to introduce you to his family. After 5 years and both of you are not known to each others family members, simply points to the fact that he may not want to marry you. 5 years of relationship without commitment towards marriage is an error.

Don't be in a haste to get married. You can wait for him if your patience threshold will allow you.
If not, develop yourself, add value to yourself and tread carefully. Wait for the right guy who is willing to commit to marriage.