₦airaland Forum

tbatbaby: Thanx all.@onegai,thanx 4 d explanation.I will prefer d iman powder buh dont know d particular of its brand 2 opt 4.cos I saw 2 to 3 brands of d iman powder apart 4rm d foundation at d beauty shop I visited,buh I need a pro or make up artist 2 put me thru.Am dark skinned n av an oily face,which will u advice me 2 go for?

If you have dark skin and oily face, there's a trick to using and setting Iman powder to last on the skin. By the way, Powder won't give you coverage, not Iman powder, it won't cover up your dark spots and pimples, and I hate seeing ladies pile it on their face trying to make it do that, it's too much makeup. Only very good makeup artists know this trick, most don't. I usually recommend products and teach my clients how to do their own makeup, so they don't look caked in makeup. You need a pressed oil-blotting powder from the Iman line for your oily skin.
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You are losing a good girl, and I'm glad you know this. So you cannot come and whine later about how chicks are not good. It seems the problem here is mostly the sex and then you not being ready to settle down. I can't tell you what to do, but I will tell you what several men in their 40s and older from the past generation told me:
That if they knew what they knew now then, their choices would be so different.
If I could go the past now, I'd tell 24 year old me so much! I'd be happier, but at least now I'm kind of content. I think.

For women, 90% of the time, if your gut is telling you something, no matter what the man is saying, your gut is correct. My instincts are rarely wrong, it's me that doesn't listen, hoping for the best. Well, Hope is now a girl's name, not a way of life. Not anymore.

flexya: Onegai, u sure u r not me/my family cos all u said is so close 2 home. I am fortunate 2 hold dual citizenship (UK and Nigerian), so our unborn child automatically gets british citizenship, wit my wife bein eligible 2 apply for UK visa without much wahala. My ex-wife (whom I met whilst livin in London in 1997 and married in 2000) got UK citizenship via me. We returned 2 nigeria in 2006, only for her 2 walk out on me a few yrs later, takin our two daughters. The youngest was only months old then. She was from Akwa Ibom. She never even waved me goodbye. Now this one is from delta. I prayed I av not goofed again. God please.

Thank u all so far.

Eniti o ba bere ona ko ni shina (he who asks for directions never gets lost)

No worries, I'm from Delta, good and bad women come from everywhere (my cousin's ex was Benue, then Urhobo). Almost everyone in my family is married, no in-law/groom was told to pay for house-painting. Her family doesn't want to pay for anything for the wedding, which is wrong. My anger is that your wife is letting them do this. Painting house is NOT/NEVER to be paid by you. Don't send a penny, unless it is for your hotel. Be strict, no smiling. Or her family will come later demanding money/stuff from you, and she'll continue following them till it causes fight btw both of you. Tell her she can be a single mother, let her eye clear and her brain work! These are the signs men will see and still chook head and later come and complain "I didn't know this about my wife".

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I feel you, Urhobo people!! Mscheww. Oya, here's how to handle business, because my cousin is suffering the same thing at the hands of his yoruba fiancee (so what if she's the first person to marry, ehen?). This is harsh, but ask the girl which is more important, taking care of her home and baby or having a big wedding. Give her 24 hours to make the decision, tell her not to call you. You must sound harsh. Don't pick your phone. Tell her to go and talk to her family or she should marry her family and never call you again. All this money spending must stop, you are not supposed to pay for the elders coming from village (her family owns that). Be ready to walk away, she's your wife, all this is nonsense. Let her know who's in charge of decisions, you or your family. Let her cry if she wants, offer her a bucket.
My cousin went to Ughelli to marry (2nd marriage for him). This same nonsense happened, but he kept dropping money. 7 months later, the girl fled with his baby to UK and said she didn't want to see him again. Apparently she had been looking for a way to travel and he was her ticket.

Alright! Even though some of our languages are dying and our culture is being forgotten by everyone except white people; and we are barely literate in English in this country, have yet to master French (a language spoken by all our neighbours), we're gonna learn Chinese, with all the different characters and different signs AND NOT WRITTEN IN THE SAME ALPHABET. We have obviously finished learning everything there is to learn in Science, Math, Social Studies and English. Great. #Sarcasm

You are immature, what else is new?

Move on. Any guy that does this to me and decides to show up saying he's regretting should hold his money and be ready to keep begging till I see fit. So the grass wasn't as green on the other side, abi? Please tell your present gf that your rel is for show only so she doesn't get her hopes up, you know how you naija men like to lie not be forthright with the correct answer

Weirdly, whenever someone decides to chase greener pastures and treat their ex like dirt in their rush to get to the greener pastures, it takes 3-6 months for their eye to clear (it ALWAYS does, even if na marriage), for them to gather liver and return. Unfailingly. Has happened to me and I was given that time limit and he came back, and I didn't want him again. This is the reason why I say you should break up with your ex well and treat them well, because your breakup reflects your state of mind, if you acting on heightened emotions, you are most likely rushing and making a poor not well-thought out decision. And emotions eventually die and you wake up from your infatuation. Your thoughts, NL?

There's nothing wrong with brown powder, you just need a good hand and try to understand the good brands.

Brown powder (setting powder to pros) can come in loose or pressed format. Pressed is easier to carry, so more people use it, but loose sets the face better. From my experience, and those whom have used them, some brands we know about are:
Black Opal: a good brand, but is not suited for the nigerian climate, so will do nothing for you
MAC: same as above, sweating while wearing this will look quite bad
Iman: quite good, but doesn't have staying power and has been brand-diluted due to the number of fakes on the market, so be careful where you buy from
House of Tara: good, but acts more like a cream-to-powder formula. I'll explain more on how to work this brand
For more answers, please contact: www.naijapretty..com

Bio-oil strangely has a lot of hype and does nothing. For pre-made cleansing oils, you can try Ole Henrikson and some spa brands like Dermatologica and Exuviance, but all are quite expensive. However a custom-blend of good olive oil+almond oil+lavender oil is great for oily skin

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[quote author=dammytex]OK mami,
Why I want a Mel-San? I'd still prefer her to a Mel-chol. Things will be a lot easy with her and I'm not sure I like female competition, I like to just respect and honour her for whom she is. Being a Mel, the most difficult thing about her would have to be mood swings and that I understand.

Out-think me; maybe. Out-smart me; even maybe but out-charm me; never (trust your guy naa). My Sanguine no be mumu oooo.
BBC Knowledge+Comedy Central=Perfecto. I always love humour while learning things. I remember things learnt while flexing than things learnt being serious. In fact, I hate being serious (weird right? don't worry; I know). Only God knows how I will propose. In school, I used to read my Engineering Maths textbook (Stroud 1 & 2) while strolling up and down the street.

Conscience; I guess that's a plus to my advantage.
Super organized; thank God. At last, I can find my pairs of socks well arranged somewhere.
Are you saying, Mel-sans could also be a Michelle Obama, a good political wife? Yeh pa!!!

Willing to pay any amount for a free MEL-SAN in the house please...

Waiting...

I've got a free, very pretty mel-san, who's an artist (she's an engineer too). She may be older than you sha. Are you over 28?

dammytex: ooooooooooooooo
This Choleric people, their shakara too much abeg. Maybe because we are both extrovertish in nature, we hardly get along. In office, the cholerics in my team would always want my inputs submitted exactly the way (format) they want it plus the time they want it. Trust me naa, I'd always look for the easiest and the less stressful way of approaching quality solutions and most times, it won't be in their (cholerics) way. (who cares; as long as the solution output is accurate).
Other guys always prefer me around when the tension is high especially when we are working extra hours to meet deadlines. I try to make them relax and create fun out of the job while we execute. The cholerics always find this disgusting as they like to show off their strength (without team-work) the most, in times of pressure.

In life, I take a lot of things calm and easy. Truthfully, I can be lazy about many things too though. I sleep late, always catching one fun or the other on phone, TV or internet. Of course, often lazy to wake up early. I sleep a lot on weekends too if allowed, but my house is always the meeting point of my friends every weekend. so most times, we are either yabbing one another or hanging out in public/event places.

Please, just give me a Mel-san abeg. I don't like wahala at all. In fact, I've completed one and a half score and I've never fought anybody before in my life if you care to believe. She will be receptive to my jokes and she can always kick-start humour on my behalf, should I switch to phleg mode. As for her mood swings, God dey.

So, have I spoken well?

You sound like a San-Phleg. Why do you want a Mel-san? Have you lived with one?? One minute they're happy, next they're upset. You won't know because her melancholic will hide her pain till it turns to anger (sanguine) and her sanguine bursts into floods of tears and anguish and the sun will stop shining once that starts (melancholic depression). She'll out-think you and outsmart and out-charm you, it's like living with a tv whose channel is BBC Knowledge and Comedy Central, lol. Never a dull moment. However, combine a passionate nature with a compassionate nature (sanguine) with a introverted nature which always wants to do right and is a perfectionist(melancholic). I hope you're ready for her conscience to be very strong, lol. Get ready for her to be super-organized (you will NEVER lose your underwear) and be messy at the same time (She won't understand why you have to fold clothes, but will organize shirts, trousers, socks and pants, separately). Listen to her, 99 percent of her ideas are seriously good. Also, she'll make an excellent political wife, sh'll earn you votes with how passionately she feels people's pain and her belief in you, plus her rational excellent ideas on how to do right while guaranteeing you don't steal. So don't be a politician in Naija.

signed, San-Mel

So what will a Sanguine Melancholic female like me need? I tend to like Phleg-Chlors, but they're all laid-back jerks (ignoring me after coming on strong).

Here's the thing: Sometimes, a choleric suits another choleric. You can't always use temperament as a guide. All I know is that I've never seen a dominant sanguine marry another dominant sanguine, someone has to shut up eventually. I have seen San-Chlor marry Chlor-San, some are unhappy.

virtuoso01: Remember what happened in Russia during its privatisation. It gave rise to fabulously wealthy men(Oligarchs) who controlled key aspects of the country in an unholy alliance with the established politicians.





Less than one percent of the country now controls almost a hundred percent of its resources, these men became Billionaires while the Russian citizens became paupers. I hope this is not what is currently happening in Nigeria.



I think I can read the writing on the wall.

Dude, I worked for government last year. 6 months ago, I turned to my colleague and told her to start applying for a stay permit to another country, as we were the next Russia. Wait till the poverty levels start rising.

Idowuogbo: I go jam am for house wiv my fellow agberos and warned d fuckerrrrr make hin no call, txt, mail, ping, Skype, tweet, fb me again. I don't do d txting or calling brouhaha, I only do eyeball to eyeball.

When I grow up, I want to be like you. Haven't ended a relationship in a while, the guys usually finda childish amazing way to end it and later come back "checking" on me. I need to decide if I will use the next one to buy phone before I tell him to get lost.

Men do this too: toast and toast and wake up and disappear. People simply don't know what they want and keep looking for greener pastures when they already have what they need close by, until age/loneliness gets them. They now wake up and say "all the good men/women are gone", remember how you use to love them like mugu and make them feel good and start trying to find a way to come back to you. That's when you get the "hey what's up, longest time" or "na wa for you, you don't say hello" or "just checking up on you" message, to which my answer is always "GTFOAFMP, slowpoke". Seriously, you always get bored with the right people, then be standing outside hoping for Perfection and the right person will quietly move on with their life.

CHAIRMAN1: Enters thread... Gets lost.
Can't understand Naada, too many jargons....I love music.... All genres....my best genres are highlife and pop. I know the 3 tenors, know george handel etc but u guys make me feel like an illiterate in this school of Classical music ... I take to my heels

come back na, me too I don't understand everything.

Don't be proud of yourself. Because one girl hurt you, you went about hurting several women, one of whom may have dated a guy that encouraged a girl for 3 months, only for him to disappear like she was a demon, no arguments, just didn't reply any messages or used the wicked way you treated her to deal with a guy who will insist on sleeping with a girl looking for commitment and then bail after, though he made promises and on NL, all of us will add insult to injury by insulting her. That's an example, but I'm sure it's real. I'd have congratulated you if you had said your ex treated you badly yet you decided to be good and not hurt girls till you meet the one you marry (and I'm sure guys hurt her too, so yeah). Right now, all I can say is "big deal". Go impress me by apologising to the girls who paid for your ex's mistake.

start from the inside, reduce the amount of sugar you eat and increase your uptake of water and fruits. then use a moisturizer day and night, i recommend olay regenerist, it's very thick for older skin and neutrogena or aveeno for younger skin. if you want to spend more money on creams, go for estee lauder, makari, clarins or lancome.
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noholdsbarred: I'm not married, but I believe that as long as you're human, such thoughts and feelings usually come to bear, though it happens to some people more than others. I'm about to get married and I'm not sure she's the right person. I'm not even sure if there's a right person. I have this feeling that even if I do get the 'right' person, I'll still get to that point when I'll question myself if I've made the right choice. I believe that anyone can be the right person as long as there's tolerance and understanding in that relationship. I'm not of the view that one person in meant for a particular person, anyone can fit into that shoe. Well, that's my opinion.

There is no right person, but the decisions I see made in choice of spouse convinces me utterly that 70% of the people are making a mistake, myself included. The sad thing is that we meet people that in the long-run, would be best for us, both always let them go, whether it's "we got tired and bored, longdistance, a hotter chick/richer dude,selfishness etc". We spend all our time not practising the behaviors that would sustain a marriage: patience, hardwork, selflessness, submission, honesty, courage. But we then make lousy choices, then somehow expect all those virtues I listed above to miraculously show up in our marriages. Like a guy who did year one of Med school and expects to become a surgeon in year 2.

Leave her. She's sadly not into you. She'll spend a few more years dating Id.iots and crying on your shoulder about it. When you now have a babe, she'll quietly be dying inside. I've been in her situation, guys have been in that situation with me, and it is the reason my brother told me "never in a relationship make a choice based on emotion, or how you feel. Chances are high it's the wrong choice". Let her be, go find some girl who will not avoid you.

Cynthia was a young, very soft and sweet girl. She was contacted by people tellling her that she could get merchandise for her boutique cheaply, so she inquired and came down to Lagos, where she was informed the clothes were in a hotel, and she went to inspect them. The murderers, after the incident, proceeded to use her phone to call her friends and family that she was in a hospital in Edo state and requested money be sent to them for her. It was tracing those phone calls that caused them to be caught. Please stop painting this girl as a foolish person who jumped a plane for fun, she was a savvy businesswoman, her first job, she used the funds to set up her boutique so she could be financially independent.

Let's clarify this: does my ex still get a glowing recommendation when he decided to leave the rel or whatever we were doing by simply disappearing without informing me, as if I was a child who couldn't handle the truth (apparently ladies, we are old enough to be told "I want to knack you, face to the wall from behind", but we are not grown up enough to be told "I've had enough, pls let's end this", lol); or after he has confirmed my replacement, then breaks up with me, only for me to see my replacement a week later; or comes to see me and starts chasing my roomie, asking for advice how to dump me and get her, causing she and I to clash? Like, when exactly do we get to be honest about our ex, or we just go "he was awesome!" Hahahaha

I told my bestie about her bf who was dating her in school, then having one yoruba chick escort him and family everywhere (you know yorubas boys, how they will date another tribe and marry their village chick). He had told her the usual "she's chasing me, family pressure, blah blah". An ex-classmate of mine told me that girl was considered his wifey. So I sat my bestie down and told her. She knew, but my saying helped open her eyes a bit more. Eventually, they broke up, bestie's happily married and I was her chief bridesmaid, idiot is still single. If your friendship is strong, it'll overcome this.

Next time you see Ola and him chatting, join for a few minutes, then casually say "btw, Guy, how is Sisi (her name), your gf?" Let him deny it publicly that he's dating. Don't say more than that. Ola must hear the question and his reply. It's upto her to follow up or accept.

Awww, poor you. You'll get over it, I promise. Don't give up, she wasn't yours. Your girl will come and when she doesn't hear from you, she'll miss you. Try and just watch tv or do stuff to take your mind off things. Pele

The mistake people make is having too much ego to go back, guys go "abeg, plenty girld dey ground", women say the same. Yeah, plenty dey? But how many are truly yours? You now spend more time dating wannabe, has-been, trying-to-be, does-not-care-unless-you-spend, only-bleeps, unforgiving and cheating. All the while, a small voice is in your head saying "we had better than this, but our pride kept us away". Sad, really.

Well, don't let her leave that guy because of you. Give her space, but try and be clear that you care about her and wants what's best, and are trying to minimise hurting the other guy, because karma will catch both of you. Then free her (pls don't run openly into another woman's arms, you know you guys can be daft like that). Just give her space, if she decided to date you, let her end things properly with the other guy. because sometimes, it may be the grass is greener on the other side and you're the greener grass and she's been comparing and not seeing you clearly, but putting down her bf.

Well, comprehension skills have dropped dramatically. The OP said she's not sleeping with him, yet you're all saying "itzz the sex, itzzz ova!!". I'm begining to understand why Dangote sees graduates as drivers.

OP, is this his usual behavior? If it's not, something big's up, and just stay away, but remain friendly (and distant) if he calls. Then get a life. No calls, nothing, date others. Don't wait for him. If he contacts, smilingly reply 2 hours later. He has to miss you and realise you're important to him, or he has to see that you two are over and it's time to move on. But do nothing in anger, I know you're hurt. It's time to act like a big girl. He's sounds like one of my bros, good guy, serious issues. He got married at 39 to 27yr old, who put up with his crap. This doesn't like you did stuff wrong, it sounds like someone with mad issues or is married.