₦airaland Forum

mainstreets:
See d snake i killed after i returned from

In which city/town do you live?

[size=18pt]A man who rose to fame for blowing up oil installations in the Niger Delta now has police escorts and details courtesy of tax payers money. Why won't $1=N400 [/size]

Rest In Peace

emamos:
?

http://www.vanguardngr.com/2016/02/i-ll-name-those-behind-forex-crisis-if-says-ubah/

[size=18pt]Here they come again with the same rhetorical "I will name names if..." bla bla bla hogwash. We are still waiting for Orji Uzor Kalu to tell release the dossier of corrupt Nigerian governors he promised years ago. EFCC should hurry up and get to his file[/size]

conji na bastard

Metropilla:
Guess it's an efficient way of diluting what he's reading. A student was spotted reading his books in preparation for an exam while chilling with bottles of Guinness stout. Some say they understand what they read when they are in HIGH state while others argue that this is a very wrong method of reading.

http://www.metropillar.com/2016/02/see-what-this-student-was-seen-doing.html

[size=18pt]When you start preparing to retake a course before you have officially failed it[/size]

240naija:
As the nation's currency exchanges at N400 to the US dollar on Sunday, Billionaire business mogul has said that if the Buhari-led federal government consults him, he could restore the nation's currency to an exchange rate of N200 to one US Dollar within one month.

Speak­ing on a Channels Television poli­tics programme on Sunday, billionaire businessman and the Chairman of Capital Oil and Gas Services Ltd., Dr. Patrick Ifeanyi Ubah, has advised the Federal Government to consult some Nigerians who can halt the free fall of the Naira which is affecting the na­tion’s economy.The Nai­ra currently exchanges at N400 to the US dollar.

The Publisher of The Authority newspapers, said that if the President Buhari-le federal gov­ernment consults him, he could re­store the nation’s currency to an ex­change rate of N200 to one US Dollar within one month, thereby arresting the slide in the Naira which is virtu­ally crippling the economy.

The Chairman of Ifeanyi Ubah Football Club, however did not say how he was going to bring the Naira down to an exchange rate of 200 per dol­lar, but said the government could seize everything he owns if he failed to do this within one month, if given the mandate.

Chief Ubah also affirmed that he was not involved in any way what­soever in the $2.3 billion Dasuki­gate arms deal that involved the for­mer National Security Adviser, Col Sambo Dasuki, adding that he was not in­volved in the politics of contracts and has never done any government con­tracts, whether at the Federal, state or local government levels.

"I am highly misunderstood, sometimes controversial. But I have never done any government contracts. I did not collect any money from Gov­ernment; I do not have an oil block – and I have not asked for one.

"I did not know Dasuki. TAN nev­er received money from Dasuki or the People’s Democratic Party. We did what we did in the interest of the na­tion and for posterity.

"I’m a politician with a mind-set of making life worth living for the people, when issues seem to be getting out of hand. So TAN has no hand in whatever that has to do with the arms deal fund."

He said following the controver­sies trailing the #Dasukigate, it has be­come necessary for him to extricate himself from allegations that himself and the non-governmental organisa­tion, Transformation Ambassadors of Nigeria (TAN), were in anyway in­volved in the sharing of the arms deal money.

https://www.tori.ng/userfiles/image/2016/feb/22/dr-ifeanyi-ubah-speaking-1.jpg
https://www.tori.ng/userfiles/image/2016/feb/22/dr-ifeanyi-ubah-speaking-3.jpg
http://www.levitoday.com/2016/02/i-can-bring-us-dollar-to-n200-in-one.html

Since the decline of the Naira, Ifeanyi Ubah has been mopping up any available forex in the black market. He probably has an underground vault somewhere filled to the brim with USD. Now that EFCC is dusting up his file, he is desperate to enter the good books of this administration by claiming messiah. He can actually do what he is promising, but not because he is a magician. He will simply flood the market with the USD he has been stockpiling.

arena2007:
A corper is given a class room as his accommodation by his ppa, he can only have access to his so-called room, only if the pupils might have been closed.

Nairalanders how do you see this?

Source: http://www.9janewsarena.com/2016/02/see-accommodation-given-to-corper-by-his-ppa-photo.html

This is actually a very warm reception. 4 chairs, a table, mattress. Free of charge. Next thing, they will start stacking tubers of yams for you. Before 3 months, they will find you a wife and make you a tribal "shief"

Onyiibazz:
Let me dignify you with a mention.
1. My keyboard 's auto complete did that and before my attention could be drawn to it, it has been taken to the front page where i can' t edit the original post again.
2. Madam in your haste to make a fool of thine own self, you ended up making the worst grammatical blunder. E.g, it is not "what did they teach you", it is "what were you taught".
Now stay off my mention you child of perdition.

Diokpa, I can assume from your latest cerebral and orgasmic outburst that you are better acquiesced with command of the queen's language than I erroneously presumed. However, I am unaware of the existence of the word "coperate", so do not blame its magical appearance on your post on auto-complete. Even Nairaland acknowledges that coperate does not exist. What language is your computer set to? Pidgin? Anyway, congratulations on your graduation. Welcome to the Nigerian job market.

Onyiibazz:
I decided to try something different. So while everybody was on coperate, I was on native.

[size=18pt]Seriously diokpa!!! You just graduated from UNN and cannot distinguish between corporate and cooperate?
Tomorrow, you will take to the streets to protest lack of jobs. What did they teach you in UNN...coperate has not made it to the dictionary yet
Chai!!! Aru e mekwala education in Nigeria. No wonder $1=N400
Chai! I don put leg for nshi ab.oki. Anyway nice shoes shaa [/size]

[size=18pt]Tompolo! I no blame the guy. If they catch am, e no go see day light again. Meanwhile what happened to Asari Dokubo? Has he stopped dishing out those fiery outbursts on youtube like he used to, or did he lose his voice overnight? [/size]

[size=18pt]These are the authentic millionaires in Nigeria. [/size]

[size=18pt]Orji Uzor Kalu: The man who converted Aba into a rubbish dump. He governed Abia state for 8 years and could not rid one street in Aba of refuse. That is a disgrace beyond measure. Only Rochas can attempt that record[/size]

[size=18pt]conji na bastard[/size]

abuayman:
Hmmm

[size=18pt]
Before you start forwarding and liking and quoting, ask yourself when the internet was invented (1980s) and when Abe Lincoln died (1865)[/size]

[size=18pt]So OP just enter bank, carry phone begin pursue woman nyash. I don dey suspect you OP[/size]

Anamco did not start today. If things work in this country as expected, Anamco should have opened at least 2 other plants in Nigeria.

[size=18pt]I suggest he removes his boxers as well. The money may reappear at that stage[/size]

[size=18pt]The man who cleaned out Bornu state treasury. PDP!!![/size]

Acidosis:
Sequence to this thread earlier posted today:
https://www.nairaland.com/2920930/chris-okafor-raises-dead-baby

I've noticed so many Nigerians find it easy to run in droves to witness Bonnke's crusade but whenever they hear a Nigerian Pastor performs a miracle, they open their mouths to utter degrading words about Africa, Nigeria, and anything that belittles the country. They even make some of us who believe in God to look stu.pid. Meanwhile, they will never call Reinhard Bonnke's miracle "staged." It is the same sets of people that will occupy his crusade ground to see the International German Evangelist. We attend because he's WHITE?

I really want to know why our people act the way they do. Can't we limit this slave mentality to trade? Must we showcase these attitudes on religious discourses?

If you do not believe, keep quiet and allow their followers hail their OWN. Africa is not the only continent where people serve God. The biggest Church in the world is in South Korea (not Nigeria). Korea is still a developed country with globally acceptable hardwares! They have the biggest church in the world few metres away from the country's National Assembly. Ours is in Mowe, Ogun state, several miles away from Abuja.

Winners Chapel or RCCG in Nigeria, as opposed to what some want us to believe, is not the reason for our poor infrastructure and poor leadership. We are backward because we are backward mentally.

This is a sound warning to intellectual handicaps who always attribute our economic, social and technological woes to Religion, Christianity in particular.

Let's stop this public display of SHAME, please!

Go and read about Jim Jones and understand the origin of most of these charlatan pastors deceiving Nigerians. They mount the pulpit as paupers and start buying private jets and building choice mansions while their mumuish zombied followers continue to impoverish themselves in the name of religion.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jim_Jones

[size=18pt]They should find the politicians that armed these robbers. Those are military-grade AK47 assault rifles. They are not sold at Ojuelegba[/size]

[size=18pt]See Nigerian police dey here dey do meguard. Nigeria jagajaga. Small time now IG go begin yarn dust[/size]

[size=18pt]Why won't it grind to a halt when Buhari's doctor is in London, and Nigerian doctors have been in and out of strike like leg in and out of trouser. A cath lab is a life saving investment in any country, and we just let one go to waste. It is really heart breaking[/size]

[size=18pt]Where did they get all those dirty mattresses? Always looking for more ways to embarrass this country. We cannot afford brand new mattress for our athletes[/size]

[size=18pt]But they never do am anything naaa[/size]

[size=18pt]Sounds like another ashawo that lost out in the game and is now fighting dirty[/size]

[size=18pt]Could the zika be a flawed engineered mosquito devised to eradicate malaria[/size]

[size=18pt]The fire would have burnt the ropes off before the goat and allowed it to escape. Besides, the goat/sheep would have its legs retracted if it were burnt alive[/size]

[size=18pt]Fayose is ready to answer for Treason[/size]

Dragovich:
Honestly, I never thought of my parents to be over-protective, until I spent a few days at a friend's house. It was then I realized that I've never been allowed to enjoy my teenage years and emancipate myself. I'm 20+ and in my final year in the University, but my parents (especially my dad), are extremely controlling. Apart from the constant phone calls, they still treat me like I'm a five year old. My dad hardly ever let's me drive, and even told me that he feels embarrassed if neighbors see me driving. The best I can do in this regard is to sometimes "steal" the car. Also, they are both obsessed with what other parents think about their parenting skills. Everytime we have visitors or we visit someone, he always tries to speak to me harshly as if trying to show off his strictness to other parents. I feel so disrespected and trapped. While other parents of my friends allow their kids drive, give them responsibilities, and a certain sense of freedom, I stuck with these helicopter parents that are always hovering over my life trying as much as possible to make me not to have any form of independence. I'm really beginning to hate them. Please what can I do abt this?

This is an opportunity for you to learn to be patient. It seems like your parents are denying you the right to emancipate and be yourself (grant you freedom to do as you please). I would advise that you focus on your studies and strive to graduate as scheduled and then get a job. When you become financially independent, you can then move out of your parents protection and free yourself. Different parents have different ways of raising their children. It is hard to judge them if you do not have a child of your own.

[size=18pt]Day don break like egg. Eye don clear like highway when mopol dey pass[/size]

ikbnice:
[b]A lady was dragging her box while on a bike.


Can this comfortably happen in Nigeria especially Lagos?

[size=18pt]
This is NOT Lagos. Take a look at the billboard.[/size]