₦airaland Forum

Echidime:
Are you sure you did not contribute to his been GAY? Were you giving him maximum sexual satisfaction? Check yourself and know where you went wrong.

ASk yourself,was he gay before you married him? if yes means you did not know him well before marriage,if you do you could have found it out then. Is it after your wedding that he became gay? find out

@Echidime,

As many people have tried to say on this thread in one way or the other; no woman can give a gay man maximum sexual satisfaction.

zayhal:
A friend was complaining bitterly a couple of weeks ago that[b] one poor guy[/b] came to ask for her hand in marriage. Could I imagine! She was so upset and pissed off, lamenting "Me! A whole me! with that church rat!"

_{She's living comfortably, beautiful apartment, nice car et al}

I just wonder what she wants again from a rich guy

@zayal

In as much as I  do not support the woman's attitude, a man can approach anyone and all you need to do is politely say 'No'(My Church driver asked him to marry him when I was single and I politely told him I was not interested).
I want to ask you -what does the poor man have to offer her? Is he ready to support her at home while she makes the money the way a poor woman would support the rich husband?

or  will she be expected to carry all the load and die at a young age from 'overburden'?

It is funny that nobody has been able to point out one thing that the men may be doing wrong, It has not been considered by anyman on this thread .It all has to be the fault of the women as usual.
The women just want to kill and destroy their nice and kind husbands!

@Post

The labour market is available for everyone and may the best guy/gal always win!


If the poor guy is ready to support the rich woman to make sure that she gets the very best out of her carrer (as the poor wife would support her rich husband making sure that the home front is well taken care of, giving the husband the peace of mind to face his job squarely and make something for the family), no problems, but if the the poor guy has nothing to offer and expects the rich woman to take care of the home front, carry pregnancy, carry pickin and then put bread on the table, haba, it will not work.

This is the main reason Nigerian women (living in Nigeria)would prefer a rich man, so that she knows that the bread will be taken care of while she focuses on her own perceived role, because the man will not lift a finger in that direction, it's supposed to be a woman's job-so they say. The poor one is even the hardest, low self esteem sets in and he will always want to prove to the woman that he is the head of the home.

Unfortunately for these women, they still do not get these rich men, or when they do they are sharing them with 5 others, so you still see them struggling to train their children.

OAM4J:
'I abhor Ignorance and I ignore stupidity'

Girls, I taught Van the secret of looking good. Jenny, with a good money I can transform that guy in your profile pic to look better than V V

When I was still a child, not even as handsome as I am now , my mum used to sing my oriki (praise song) like this;

'Omo ti ko we to ndan. O we lodo gbogbo omoge nyo owo ose, won wipe 'Temi ni ko mu, temi ni ko gba'. Eni ti OAM4J ba gba tie, O se orire'.

@OAM4J

I am still laughing, you people will not kill someone on nairaland!

, and someone once asked why marriages are crumbling?
Ggoing through this thread  answers that question, many young people simply do not have anything of value to offer another human being sharing their lives!

Pataki:
Nice topic for once.

Simply because I do not live a self-centred life. It is not all about the sex or the money. It is about companionship, friendship, that spontaneous excitement and that unpredictability to what I may possibly do next, the ability to listen even when she is talking her jargon, the ability to be the man that fixes things when it goes wrong, the ability to see beyond her nose and give my input without forcing my opinion on her. The ability to stay calm, loving and rise above any troubling situations. The list is simply endless.

Oh well, anyone can dream such innit?

@Pataki, thanks for making my time on this thread worthwhile.

obalukan:
Ibadan oooooooooooooo, omo ajegbin je karaun omo afikaraun fori mu ibadan ilu ojo, ily ajayi, ilu ibikunle, ilu ogunmola, olododo keri keri loju ogun, omo agbo sasa ma sa omo agbo yaya maya, ooooooooooooooooo Ibadan Oni baje (Amin) oooooooooo poster thanks for the good job

Obalukan!! If I could spray you money through the computer, you would be covered with naira notes  now as expected traditionally

Ogunmola happens to be my greatgrandfather, It was an exciting day for us when his statue was placed at Total Garden round about, many years back.


To all Ibadan people, kindly suggest places to hang out in Ibadan, I have been leaving in another part of the country for about 20years,I only go home during Xmas or for family functions. Many of my school mates have left town so I find my stay in Ibadan boring after a few days. I take my son to the Zoo and Amusement park and that's it.


I live around Bashorun, so please feel free to suggest interesting places, I am a female so shoping centers are appreciated as I want to make use of this coming Xmas trip to get some laces and shoes from exciting places different from the Traditional Gbagi etc.

nkilirox:
The original poster removed her posts, hmph

I think if your husband has the expectation for you to be a full time housewife, then he should create the environment that allows for that. If your family relies on the money that your career brings in to maintain your home and family's current lifestyle, then expectations need to be adjusted. You cannot have a full time housewife and expect her to contribute financially to the home.

Thank you nkilirox

johnterry4:
@op,
am sure u v been waiting for my post.d truth is dat something is wrong with our women.u allow them a finger and they put the whole hand.who says u cant combine being a careeer woman with being a good housewife.i think u are d lazy type.if u cant combine both successfully then u are a FAILURE.hope u even satisfy oga in bed.if u cant,then i` suggest that u get him a househelp who will be taking care of him(cooking his meals and forking him).

johnterry has spoken

@Johnterry,

Will it still be 50/50?, Is she a super human being?what exactly will be the role of the husband in this kind of marriage? Is a man expected to share his perceived main role with the wife but the wife not expected to shed any of her own main roles? I guess this is this the only kind of marriage that will make a man happy? so what of the woman? am sure you will tell me that was what she was born to do- the unfortunate woman!

@Post,

The responses to this thread are a lesson to all women who carry unneccessary loads, they work hard for other people to enjoy and are never appreciated for it, the society will still condenm you!
If it is a small apartment your husband can afford stay there with him, if it is some 'ponmo' he can afford eat it like that, for the singles, make sure it is thouroughly discussed before marriage

For the Poster, if you are still checking, Chaircover has mentioned something about her children's school, you may contact her for details if you happen to stay in the same city. I understand your desire to do your best towards your Children's education, but all they may remember when they start to work in 'NASA' is that they had a mother who was never around! that is, if your work load does not destroy your health before then and you are actually around to reap the fruit of your labour.

cold:
This just goes to confirm my suspicions that fidelity is overrated.This News of the World sef,their own that to dey go all out to wreck homes,assasinate characters,smear images etc,na wa o.Anything Rupert Murdoch own na so,from Fox News to NotW.

P.s why am i no longer recieving notifications on topics i hav made comments on inspite of the fact that i havn't adjusted my settings

You are right, fidelity is overrated and will continue to be overrated, with the way the world worships sex, a young boy is exposed to love-peddlers at age 14,  advertisements of everyday products depict sex and you expect him to keep to one woman once he is married? Many of you them are far gone before marriage!

Inked_Nerd:
Must a woman get married and have children? If they are content with their life like that then that is up to them.

No, It is not a must, but the society(If you live in Nigeria) will make sure that you are not content with your life, they will make it a living hell for you, the humiliation will kill you, even in the Church.

This is what is making many men who are not fit for marriage to have wives in their houses, the women would rather marry them like that than to end up single.

I remember when people used to say a girl's happiest day is her wedding day, but look around you these days , you will see many brides who are finding it difficult to even smile for the camera, they will tell you it's the wedding stress.

If they are lucky, the kids come quickly and make the marriage bearable,or end up finding out the man is not that bad afterall.

Believe me, it is still a man's world

^^^^^^^ one of the requirements to obtain a Nigerian e-passport is to provide a Local government letter of identification, where will she get that from?

pslm23:
ok, i have heard this like a million times, 2 women or young girls fighting and the main name calling used is ASHAWO! why?? that word has been so over used that it no longer stings like it used to. I remember when growing up, calling me ashawo while we were fighting would result in me fighting like crazy. the end result would be bite marks, bloody lips, missing patches of hair etc.

I've even heard some mothers screat out "ASHAWO" to their daughters. Waz up with that? Some people even add "jara" to it by adding naughty person at the end; Ashawo naughty person, ashawo kobo kobo . Where did this word even come from?

I realy do not hear these words around me, women I know may express their hatred/jealousy/envy by keeping malice or unreasonably avoiding you but fighting and using the word 'ashawo'? mba, not even in my University days when girls could be naughty.

queeneve:
Many of you men WERE SINGLE before you got married, and I am pretty sure you did not live with MUMMY until you got married unless you got married straight after SECONDARY SCHOOL, now, how did you EAT?

Now, if you assume the woman must LEARN HOW TO COOK, then the women must assume that you can PROVIDE, PROTEST, AND PERFORM, see the thing about ASSUME, is that you making AN AZZ OUT OF YOU AND ME,

Cooking is NOT a requirement for marriage and maybe that why MANY OF YOU ARE STILL LOOKING FOR LOVE,

Do not mind them, the same people who say the woman must cook are the same who will tell the woman to be ready to partner the man in providing for the family. Talk of double standard, at the end of the day, the woman ends up a super woman, cooks,cleans the house, carries pregnancies,nuture baby,take care of children, works to support the husband financially and if the husband does not have a job she is ecpected to fully take over that also. Na wa o!

I am SC and I had pains several times while growing up! I had series of sleepless nights.

My mum was a midwife so she could give injections and we had loads of Novagin injection in the house.
Up till now I still wonder the side effect damage  of those injections that I may unknowning have in my body

The pain became less frequent as I grew up,but I felt a very slight one when I was preganant and had to go on a long trip.


You may not be able to forgive yourself whenyou see your child in such pain

JoeGaruba:
Being AS myself, I was lucky enough to have known this before leaving secondary school.

I had to invent ways to stylishly find out from my then potential girlfriends and my eventual wife what their genotype was.

My friends and their families wend through a lot of pain. One went as far as making it till she was 30+ but she still lost the battle.

If you truly love that person, don't take the risk.

@JoeGaruba,

I smiled when I saw this,  no be small style o!
It was a duty to find out before the heart got involved to avoid complications

'As for those quoting the Leviticus, it is funny that it is this same so called bible that said it is okay for a woman to sleep with her husband's brother in order to give birth to a son. It is this same bible that says a woman who committed adultery should be stone or something along those lines. But yeah, trust the Christians to quickly point out it is from the OLD TESTAMENT, but funny enough, Leviticus is one too, but I guess it is okay when quoting it'



The new testament teachings are also against homosexuality.I am sure someone will mention where pretty soon. It has been quoted on NL in the past.

For the record about 98%(to be conservative) of those who have responded to this thread condemn what this lady has done and I join them.

The debate that has been going on now is on the issue of appropriate punishment.

I believe that the lady should apologise, the Christian community too may join her if they wish.

Shutting everything down, preventing people from writing exams and anything more than this is 'overreacting'

But I guess the Muslims will get what they want because U.I authorities would not want to face/experience what would happen if they dont.

@Goinggreat.

How do I get your contact details?
I hope to be in Ibadan by the end of the year and would very much like to get in touch.

oloritinu:
@chaircover there is light in the area and there are development and i have got info that the federal government wants to build a dry port which willl serve the northern part of the country and this will make companies to build there and very soon the price of land becomes very high., i dont know how far that is true. the area is less than 30mins drive from iwo road towards iwo town if the traffic is light. ejioku is by lalupon.

@chaircover i have this to say "ikorodu was once far from lagos but now it is part of lagos where people now live and go to work in lagos. it is just less 30mins drive as well".

hope to hear from you.

Shallom!!!

In my opinion, it will take Ejioku not less than 100years to be what Ikorodu is to Lagos.
Anyway I trust interested people to visit the place before making any commitment, so if they buy it will be because they like what they see and not because of all what you have said

From Napoli, you can take a quick trip to Pompei and Rome, thereby combining shopping and site seeing

^^^^^^ If it is by the express then it must be 'General Gas'



Goinggreat,

I am familiar with Ibadan too and I am very much flowing along with your analysis. Welldone!

That Iyaganku is a strange place, I grew up in Ibadan and never had a single friend that stayed there, are those people spirits? . They must be super rich.

What about Jericho? I believe there is a GRA there too similar to Iyaganku, I had a couple of friends staying there then so It is not as weird as Iyaganku

Fhemmmy:
How close to U of Ibadan . . . . . Lowest price?

It will take you not less than 30mins if the traffic is not too heavy.
Ejioku is a village! Land there is usually used for farming by city dwellers.

I am also interested in this, I have visited their website for information and I got the idea that you do not have to physically appear at the embassy in Lagos, could someone please confirm that? I do live in lagos and I intend sending my application through the courier service.

:-x :-x :-x :-x :-x

Ninapha:
@REAL TRUTH

I want agree with you on your opinion, Most people see spiritual things as things they can handle anyhow. If we want to tell ourselves the truth, how many pastors/men can live without a wife/woman/girl just to make heaven. Most pastors have caused God more pains while presenting themselves as Christians to their churches.

So long Pastor Ituah has not done anything contrary except if 1. He married before the first wife. 2. If the first wife is willing to come back to him.

I have seen cases where Christians hold on to marriages that have caused then their eternal heritance. A marriage of sorrow, filled with hatred for each other yet for the sake of the church,they stayed together. Now what is the guarantee that such couple would make heaven after all?

A couple I know have lived together for 15yrs now without sleeping or eating anything from each other but once there is any occasion in the church, they would appear as husband and wife and yet the man has concubines here and there.

For 1Cor. 15, Like u said, i wish that u can relate its contest to the topic cos I read it but it looks vague in relation to the topic.

@Ninapha
God bless you for this simple but deep statement, staying in a difficult marriage could cost you eternal life!
My Pastor, in one of his sermons mentioned that a sister got married unknowingly to someone with a mental problem, the man chases her around at night with all sorts of objects, but as far as he(the Pastor) is concerned she cannot leave the mariage (not even the man's house) becuase leaving will be disobeying the word of God.

How can this woman live with this man without wishing him dead? since it is only his death that can set her free, how can she have these evil wishes and maintain a relationship with God in her heart? and if she is not able to maintain this relationship with God, how will she make Heaven?

This is one of the reasons, I have decided to stay away from leadership positions in the Church, I want to live for God and not for people!

DejiYesufu:
It is to the kind of post above I wish to respond to: There is a prayer we should all pray and that is not to marry the wrong person; Divorce is hell. Only God should put people together and only God can command a seperation. If Ighadalo divorced and married another, let no man Judge him but leave him to God.
The Redeemed Church(RCCG) that has chosen to crucify him for his actions will be judged for greater sins they do that no man see them doing.
I wish the good pastor success in ministry and I pray again in yoruba 'Olorun o ni je ka ri ogun divorce O!'.
Amen.

I do not think they crucified him, they just have a laid down principle of how thier Ministers /Pastors should be, based on their understanding of the scriptures. I do not think they wish him evil.

I am not a member of RCCG by the way, I just try to understand other's people perspective to the best of my ability

Kennyblues:
Its photoshop

I thought so too.

Siena:
If I was the guy, I would not opt for a DNA test. Assuming he does, and it comes back positive, i.e, he's the biological father, what does he then tell his wife? That he doubted her fidelity? A DNA test could break even the most stable of marriages.

They also have 2 other kids between them, so they're not a "brand new" couple that don't understand each other.

If I were the woman, I would request for a DNA asap to clear myself.

greateros:
@deluxecad. Am dead serious. Sample the opinion of 10 married couple and u will be shocked by what u will hear. Marriage is man's worst institution. mostly now dat women are liberated!

In the days of our mothers they silently take all the sh--it. But today's women are not ready to accommodate any rubbish from any man mostly in the bed chamber!

Oh, so marriage has simply become a man's worst institution because he can no longer be giving the poo and the  woman silently taking it?

Is that what you believe marriage is supposed to be? An institution where only one party is allowed to be happy?

Any one sided relationship will crumble with time, be it marriage or something else

@Justwise

Thanks!

I have tried to scant through this thread to get the info I want but it is not working
Please can anyone provide a link where one can check the if a U.K school is genuine.

A friend's brother got an admission into this school and I have been asked to help check it out.

School of Business and Law
Hannibal house
London, SE16TE,UK

Ninapha:
well, well, well, I could not help laughing at some comments here.

My case was a turn of events, i was warned by people who knew my mother-inlaw that she could slap me, she could ask me to leave the room and i actually prepared myself for any eventuality but i first brought out my best reserving my worst for the troubled days, but whoa! my mother in-law is the most understanding person i have met.

What many people could not believe is our closeness even her children. Till today she said i won her by calling her " nmanyi" meaning our mother she would also call me "Ada m" meaning my first daughter though her first daughter is older than me.

Mama has her low sides but they are not things I bother much about.

she is not a good manager when it comes to money matter. well, i try to stand in the gap even when hubby says no, these days she would confide in me even before asking, if i tell her its not a good time to ask, she wont bother asking so i settle her my little way.

But honestly most mothers- in- law are good if only we daughters-in-law would treat them like our own mothers. Most problems start with this comparison of "my mother and my mother-in-law. things we could forgive our mothers we wont if it were mother-in-law. even Gifts good for our mothers we believe are too expensive for our mothers-in-law yet we expect our hubbies to love our mothers.

Well, if you try your best and its not working, keep your distance and do not nag her, just keep your distance and be independent. My Opinion!

This is not totally true, how come you feel free to tell your mum to call  before visiting and you are reluctant to tell your MIL the same thing?

If I told my MIL half of the things I tell my mum, seroius yawa go gaz.

I can look at my mum straight in the eyes and criticize her actions, I can even raise my voice at her and say Mummy, mi o gba(Mummy, I will not take that), would you advise me to do that to my MIL and still expect to have a happy marriage? , well maybe many years to come after I am able to develop the same relationship I have with my mum with her, but before then, no way!