₦airaland Forum

I would av advice you do business but the atmosphere is very toxic here in Nigeria except you have a business line you have been or have good knowledge of before now, It will take you some times to make head way if you av never been into one before now but you can still try business if you have passion and seal cus the beginning will be tough but you will gain it later with dedication and commitments. Secondly, you can go to good country where you can work and study, gather more money n you may come back to start business then. I will prefer second for you

Are you serious?
This lockdown go reveal many fake relationships. It will be too tight to lie and manage throughout 28 days

Help us tell the guy to take chill �. Shit they happen

You have got good advice here, all I have read here are reasonable advice n it is left for you to act according to what you plan for your future n where you want to be soon. You said something like he is not a player, you do not know the meaning of player, you think only guys that carries different girls are called player, your guy is a player cus he can leave you anytime he gets opportunity either to travel out or get someone better financially and that is why he will never commit himself, he can easily tell you he never promised you marriage. I can see you are still young (23-25) you can still flow with him but frankly speaking, your guy has a plan for his future he is not ready to share with you and it is only if those plans turn impossible he will then resort to plan n marry you. Your guy is a smart guy....

Be more serious n committed, do your best at every task given to you n never try to impress her, disengage yourself from people gossiping about her n start serious savings for backup cus things might go bad..... Just take off the whole film n focus.

You want to be hurting her feelings before or you will be happy to see her hurt cus I don't know why you are worried over normal statement. You sound insecure n threatened......the statement no mean anything at all, na just to pretend say you no fit hurt her.

No one will support your wife's attitude but you will be taking it too far by calling it quit just like that. You are not even asking for guide on how to go about it, you just want to call it quit. Except you want to remain unmarried, you will meet worst from another person you will go for. Marriage like every business is what you work over n over to near perfection. Find a polite way to raise it n see her reaction n deal with the issue straight away with right conversations. That woman will start having flings with that foolish guy who is not ready to understand that she has married n leave her alone. Never rush to take decision, hear from her first to see her remorse but if she persist, you can then plan on advance measure.

Men/women, lets try to work out our homes to some extent before inviting people (telling friends n family)

Ayoefa:
See you sorry gullible retarded brainwashed life. Was the man not buried by the govt in Abuja?
The hatred in a lot of you dumb mother fvkers have rubbed you of your common sense and logic.

Show us the videos of others that were berried by government or people never died of covid19 before now

Ayoefa:
Rubbish.

The level of stupidity and gullibility in this country is totally out of control.
This is a burial not a party like Funke had at her house. This is a special circumstance where the rules cannot be enforced as in others.
In fact I know someone whose family member died this week. They were allowed to move from one location to another and were allowed to perform the burial without any govt interference.
Also, even the govt says that everyone should stay at home , but you are allowed to go out if you have a good valid reason to do so like buying food, fuel, going to the hospital, going to bury a dead family member.
Almost everyone in these pictures are wearing face masks and most importantly, they are there for BURIAL not for a party.

Did you listened to Lai Mohammed on recovery of corpses of people who died as a result of covid19.....he said their corpse can not be recovered by their family and they have applied this rule to others but not applicable to Abba kyari.........where in the world have you seen corpse of people who died as a result of covid19 been recovered.......................................................You are the real gullible Human being.

iceybux:
What u believe in works for you... Not any man of God..we all man if God.. or is anyone a man of Satan??

Go and read Ephesians 4vs 1-16. You will see that Jesus himself appointed us prophets and pastors. Many big men You See today have where they hid their heads when things go tough. I understand that Nigeria prophets and pastors have messed up the show but we still have few surviving ones.

Oga, I know you have had many advice but my own is that you should calm down and relax about the whole thing since the other lady is not giving you dead line. Many people are giving you straight answer cus they are not in your shoes. Calm down and do more spiritual investigation about that new woman before you take your next move. The mistake you made is not obeying instruction that you should hold on a little more before getting married. Just calm down. God will help you out. I can relate n i practically understand what you are going through. Many people don't understand spiritual connection between husband and wife, when you marry your own wife the speed at which things turn around is always a mystery. I have had many testimonies on how things turn around for many people immediately after marriage n that is the favour part of marriage that Bible mentioned( he who find his ordean wife obtain favour). God will see you through brother.

sthecy:
Earthly paradise.....have fun when you have the money....you only live once dear

By posting on social media right. What has she achieved doing that now. To oppress those that does not have right. It is well

JeffreyD1:
Can such thing be from linage?

My dad is a womanizer, he smokes a lot, and he drinks a lot

I hate my dad though he is late

I don't drink, I don't smoke and I can't layy hand on a woman but I addicted to sex

It is possible you pick that part from your dad but certainly, it is to delay your journey in life.

If you can identify it and work on it fine but if not, fight it like a battle cus not all issues we can handle alone. I am not advising you to throw yourself to pastors but you can attend some of this local churches vigil.

iceybux:
.
There nothing like real church.. they are only interested in you givin offerings and title.. keep prayin to Ur saviour and read your Bible.. this just a phase it will pass..

Ok ooo, i heard you
That you never encountered real men of God or good church doesn't mean they are not existing. We can pray ourselves but there are situations that beyonds our control. He can pray himself but if he prays amiss, there will be no quick answer and that problem might remain for long. He will locate church if he genuinely needs solution.... I am not talking about all this glorified pastors n churches... There are many small churches which he can attend their vigils n he will see turn around.....

I am talking from experience.

I think you know where your problem is coming from... Women.... You need to find a way to control that area of your life. Serious prayer is all you need n it is not by saying I am praying myself or going to church.... You need to identify real church where you will hear about yourself. You can talk to your mom.

Good day NL, I hope we are all doing good in this lockdown.

I need information on good books and games for children of age 4 above. I will appreciate if possibly I can have locations where I can get them in Lagos.
Thank you for your contributions.

Charleys:
Alaafin's wife told Alaafin that kwam1 is stronger in bed than him.

Hmmm. It is well oooo

Chairman.... No rules to communication in marriage or relationship as long as the communication is a decent n reasonable one. Custant communication with your partner is the best way... Maybe you should update your level of information, be informed on current trends, read news, read about things that interest women, read politic, read stories.... All these will give you information to talk about.

SweetCunt97:
I was once in this boat once upon a time, I chose to dive into the sea abandon ship... I hate stress in my life abeg. This one siblings reach 9 sef but he had a good job as a banker then sha... Salary no dey reach half of month e don finish.

Abeg parents should stop popping out many kids and stressing firstborns o.

It is foolishness n lack of information that makes a young guy believes his family has entitlement right to depend on him n if such person is not serious he will never amount to anything in life cus by the time that job he is living on is gone n he doesn't have any savings to fall back on, those families will still blame him that he never done anything for them the time he has or he never done enough for them. Until you are fully stable, you are not encourage to shoulder anyones responsibility
....that thing kills young Africans.... Feeding their families... Lazy people


Dear fine girl, run for your life cus the marriage will be hell fire for you... Don't think it will be better.

I don't think kwam1 can try such a thing.... He is a typical Yoruba man and knows the weight behind it. He can't spread such clothes, it will expose him quickly. I didn't dispute that he might be promiscuous but not to that direction. The truth we surface later.

Dino should stop coming up with problems that are happening in Nigeria, we all know there is poverty in the land,we all see them, we don't need him to be a reporter on issues we are aware of..... he should be showing us how he is contributing his own resources to assist the problem......irresponsible men

No where in the world where palliative measures are not given, it is the process of sharing it that matters. Suppose these people coordinated the process of sharing the stuffs well, it wouldnt look rowdy like this. We need to be doing things in a more modest ways n stop portraying people in a poor manners.

We can all have that kind of anniversary too n even more but it takes discipline, tolerance and endurance to materialize understandings. Many of us are not ready to practice these things anymore but we all wish to see our marriages for years, we are all happy seeing 30years n 60years anniversary. We need to start preparing for it now. It is possible for all of us but it require prices. May God give us the grace.

Happy Anniversary Sir.

Everything called sin are not for God but for our benefits and uplifting. Bible mentioned couple of things that we are not suppose engage ourselves, if we properly check all those things they are all for our good and not primarily to make heaven. Having premarital sex brings/bonds you to your partner emotionally and if anything like breakup(we are humans, breakup is inevitable in relationships) happens you will have your emotion suffer and one might not recover from it forever (not everybody handles breakup well). If you engage in adultery, the two of you might be emotional about it and it can destroy your already built home. All these things are for our own good n not for God.

If you want to avoid premarital sex;
1) Don't go to relationship when you are not ready to marry...you can have friends n make it strictly friends.... No friends with benefits
2) Long time relationship should be avoided n first rule will solve that. You can start relationship maybe when you are hoping to marry next year
3) Do not yoke with an unbeliever... Go with someone that believe in your orientation
4) state the rules from the beginning and abide by it.
5) Reduce your friendship with other opposite sex once you enter agreement with one person for relationship to avoid suspiciousness.
6) flee from all appearances of evil.... Try to avoid been in close door most time... You can visit but avoid closeness inside room
7) be determined to achieve it..... It is not easy but it is possible.

It is possible with reasonable partner cus it is not achievable alone, the two must agree.. Amos 3:3

missimelda01:
True to an extent.

It still bothers me how a mother can reject a lady her son has spent time knowing, does it mean that she doesn't trust his judgement or something. Obi is gonna be a man someday and would need a mind of his own, women should know where to draw the line.

What parents sees sitting, kids will never see even clamping Kilimanjaro(mother does because they are the ones that always take spiritual things serious, fathers don't really care). My own opinion is that parents should involve in their children's activities early enough before it will get to verge of decision before they will come up with their observations and aside spiritual issue, I don't think tribal issue should be their reasons. Many youths don't take spiritual issues serious this days. That you are not compatible spiritually doesn't mean the girl/boy is bad, they are not just compatible spiritually n they have to accept that and move on to the right person..... No need staying in relationship for long before clarifying that kind of things. Don't glue yourselves emotionally and sexually before clarifying key issues.


On what op wrote, I have some men who decided their life themselves up until they get married... They do not allow sisters or mothers to come in.... They are not common...they are called Omo odo agba (I am talking from experience)

It is very possible and it is virtually happening in our individual lives today but many of us don't take times to study the trend. Many people lives a frugal lifestyles, coordinated lifestyles n a decent lifestyles, which they do not learn or observed anywhere and as they grow those lifestyles get mature. There are many attributes that I are better inherited than learn e.g frugal lifestyle, promiscuous, independent mind (when you naturally hate to depend on people), hardwork (not ready to compromise despite hardship, genuine process to success) . Though, many people tend to shift from their inherited attributes due to peer pressure or hardship or situations but the fact is, we inherited many things from our lineage( from our immediate parents down to grand parents). That is why I always support leaders are born+made school of thought. We are born with the attributes and developed them over time ..through experiences, n observations.

The pandemic end will take process, it will not come to an end just once but very soon, the larger effect of it will come to an end then followed with total eradication process. The effect of it on world economy will last and it longevity will depend on individual countries proactiveness. All hand must be on deck. I pray our government handle it well cus it might lead to recession due to our dependence on oil..... We can only be lucky if the oil price jacks up.

I think she is been extreme about it. Truth be told, woman like a man that can checkmate their horrible attitude once in a while but not like beating them. A man should be able to know how to use voice according to situations.

tell her straight or text her that you will like you guys to keep it at employer n employee relationship cus you wouldnt like to hurt her

Bluezy13:
I'm surprised You're very correct.
I grew up with it.
I didn't develop it.
It makes me a happy person. I never get hurt.

Dont be surprise, that is my true picture too (though, i dont have them plenty like you but i do manage anyone around me bearing my own happiness in mind). Just maintain it, it is going to help you a lot...................I envy anyone with such system.

Bluezy13:
Nay, no girlfriend, no wife for now.
Of course I'll marry...for the sake of having children...to make my parents happy as the only son.

As for girlfriends, well I do have ladies who call themselves my girlfriends. They "love" me even though they know I don't love them and can't even be emotional with them. They are happy as long as I play along. I'm always sincere and liberal.
I will tell a lady that I can't be emotionally attached to her, yet she will remain. To complicate the whole thing, I happen to be a nice person.
I don't understand but I have grown used to it.
For example, there is this particular lady that has made it compulsory for me to call her everyday, and i have to call her everyday else she will be depressed and her depression will definitely affect her health. She knows I don't love her. She knows I'm just playing along to make her happy because of her vulnerability.
My everyday prayer is that she should find a man that'll marry her quickly so that I can be free. I do joke with her about it sometimes. Of course we have had sex many times and she is very caring.
That's it with ladies. The more I wish them to stay away, the more reluctant they become.
I think my kind heartedness confuses them.

Going through your post, you show to be a real niggar....such attribute is the super best but it is not common. You grew to meet such and not that you developed it. People with such system do only what favours their sanity in relationship, you can not push or force them..........a perfect niggar

MadeINchenzen2:
u see. my point is that u av no business risking ur feelings with someone whose status is still just a girlfriend or boyfriend. I believe love should be a conscious choice under a persons control and not a helpless feeling u let to control or influence ur judgement or decisions.

This is a powerful key many youth never really identify and it is causing a lot of issues. People tend to go into relationship full force(with full feelings n emotions) and by the time slide issue occurs, they became broken and damaged. we need to always have that little distance which will help us during tough time. we are human beings and shit is allowed to happen. guide your feelings and emotions jealously.

You can do but always drop your emotion aside, do not go with your emotion into the game cus u might fall in love as a result of free sex with no charges. It will save you of all this girlfriend palava......you will spend less.