₦airaland Forum

[quote author=fati2001 post=94384657][/quote]How can a moniker without a profile picture look familiar @webmaster99?

Your reaction is apt!

webmaster99:
why bear the name bukatyne
please are you really a wrestler?

What has wrestling got to do with bukatyne?

On the other hand, maybe I am a wrestler for family values

Funny thread.

HRHQueenPhil:
[color=#770077][/color] she na accountant

See selling point.

Goodluck to her.

Mood11:

Did I lie?

Carry on jare! 100%

jomarq:
that was because am foolish, now am ready to learn. teach me please,it took me years to do this just to avoid mistake. yet it happens. I don't like shits. I would have stick to the one I give her myself but I want to be an alpha man without even telling her that it is meeting money.200k in a week time haba,I be dangote?elders help me get out of this embarrassment please, I can't afford to loose my meeting trust.you people should forgive me,I have not done this before.

@bold:

Is stealing now a trait of Alpha men?

When you follow ideologies without thinking.

Call the Chairman, NL Chapter of Alpha Men to help you out.

Mood11:
Your signature says, "Maturity is ur ability not to lie, but don't say the whole truth"

Maybe you should apply what you have on your signature when you get to the meeting next month. Be very mature, don't lie to them but also don't say the whole truth about the whereabouts of the money.

Money you give to your wife be like mutual funds, if you try to withdraw it suddenly it won't come out complete.

jomarq:
it started like this,I give her money to start business after much prejor from my mum that you need wife to be doing something bra bra bra.i give her 100k to start.she later come back to tell me that the money is not enough since she need to secure portion (OK bizz).now I give her another 100k that is not my money(meeting money)b/c am the treasurer.but i didn't tell her that it is meeting money and meeting is closing next month.when I ask her, she said that husband doesn't borrow wife money and get it back I should ask my mum.Elder please is it true b/c I don't know how to make 100k in the next 3weeks.l

I am more concerned about the kind of marriage you have that:
1. Your wife doesnot know you are the treasurer of an association;
2. The money you gave her is stolen from said association;
3. You can not tell her that the money used to expand her business is stolen and you have to return it at the end of the month.

Since your mother 'pressured' you to start a business for your wife and your wife has referred you back to your mother, go and meet her.

You might have a solution.

PS: There is something wrong with an association that only the treasurer can withdraw money. It should be two signatories with/without a witness. At least, a number of people who have to be crazy at the same time to agree to funding your wife's business with public funds.

SMH.

Woman, you have no shame sha.

You are married o! Are you regretting marrying your current husband?

You can divorce him and go back to Laycon.

Air head!

HRHQueenPhil:
all the best...I av a pretty sister invade u are interested

That believes in sharing finances.

Righteousness89:
Did u seek God's Face for His Choice of Partner for you?

There are Certain discussions that won't crop up if you are in God's will for you..
Naturally a Man and woman who has God as their Foundation will Naturally seek for ways to Help each other.

This one , una never start e Come be like say na Battle and Competition Una wan enter!

Brother be Careful and take your time to be sure of what you wanna enter..

A Broken Courtship is Better than a Broken Home

@Bold:

They think it is archaic so they keep asking JAMB questions.

God has created a partner for everyone with a personality best suited to them.

ThatIgboBoy:
Hello fam
I need your in put on this topic.
There is a lady I want to get married to. But we keep having one particular problem.
We both work. But she is of the opinion that her money belongs to her and she might decide to help out or not.
I am of the opinion that as a couple we have to work things out together. I dont expect her to pay any bill for me but to help out as a help mate. She flatly refused that her money is her money and she might decide to help or not. And that I should not have it in mind that she might help me. That the role of the man as the head of the house is to take care of everything.
I dont know if my perception is wrong here. I need experienced married folks to advice me.

You just told us her view on finances.

What is her view on house keeping? house chores?

If she believes she should handle the chores, the you have a 'traditional/cultural' woman.

Next question: Do you want to marry a 'traditional/cultural' woman?

How do we make gender abuse on the rise?

Just kidding.

Well, situations would always be tweaked to fit the 'women are always victims and men are always evil' narrative (ouch! except the men/women in my family) for subjective people.

Goodluck.

Ishilove:
That woman is evil personified. When we tell people to seek the face of God when choosing a life partner, they call us religious fanatics. This kind of thing is the outcome of excluding God in the selection process.

Hahahahahahaha!

Toor.

Ishilove:
Did he divorce her?

That is the question or perhaps seperate of the account is true.

Ishilove:
He should better go for deliverance from the spirit of stagnancy, failure at the edge of breakthrough and non achievement, and leave marriage talk first. Don't add to your burden. Dem no born you born suffer

@bold:

Why?

Divanona:
Eight years ago, with tears in my eye, I held his hand, begged him to stay with me that we will struggle together and succeed, but he refused. He walked away living me pregnant. Now, he's back without anything.

We were friends from the University, I graduated before him because I was studying a 4years course. The very first time, we tried to take our relationship serious was after my graduation. We had s.e.-x for the very first time and I became pregnant.
The truth is, the guy have always been good to me throughout my stays in school.
I remembered that day he sacrificed his school fees for mine so I could be able to do my final clearance. But when I became pregnant, he walked away after convincing me to keep our baby.
I went through everything all by myself.
Since last year, he has been apologizing on phone, so last week, I asked him to come. He traveled down to my place. Without being afraid of anyone harming him from my family, he believed in me and came. He's around in my family house, staying in my brother's room for the past 3days.
He has opened up everything to me, my family members and have apologized.

now, I'm so confused with my life.

He couldn't graduate, he had problem in school after I left and all this years, he has been struggling, but now he wants to take responsibility and be with us, but he had nothing. No certificate, except diploma which he later did from another school, no job, no place of his own to stay. He had nothing. He wants us to get married and have a family.


I feel I'm about to add more burden to my already stressed life.
The only positive thing here now, is the excitement my son is having seeing his father and the relationship they're building.

A part of me wants to see this guy have a great life and have direction and not see him live like this, even if I don't settle down with him. because when I meant him, he was kind, a good person, he had dreams, vision and good plans.
But living us alone all this years, with all his explanations, I'm not contented.

Another part of me is confused, afraid and I feel ishould push him away and let him go back to his life and keep moving with my son because I don't have the strength to shoulder all these.

Please matured mind in the house, what do you have to say? This is my life and it's getting more confused.
What would you advise? What should I do?
I don't want to make more mistakes.

Sorry for my lengthy write-up

I am happy you said he was good to you.

Did he leave out of 'false machoism' to go and 'hustle' for you guys?

He convinced you to keep the pregnancy so I am assuming he intended to come back to you.

Good he is establishing a relationship with his son. What happened those years he was away? Can you check his SM? Doe he still claim to love you? Do you still love him?

If we put his current financial state aside, do you still want him? Does he still want you? If yes to both questions, then you both have to get your acts together.

You said he had dreams and ambition, can you awaken them again? What does it take to achieve them? Can you start working towards that path?

Also suspend any romance between you guys for now and focus on building yourselves.

And if you cannot forget romance/sex, you both get tested and ensure you use protection. You don't want another baby in this mix.

Goodluck.

Frankyboy1:
Your female counterparts re busy flying private jets, you.guys re busy fighting a tribal war, make uja get sense go look for sugar mamas

Maybe sugar mamas have seen that the guys would be giving themselves gbas gbos on Instagram

If the male actors cannot fly jets, let them fly their mouths.

Broda Kunle messed up and Oga Mike brought a gun to a knife fight.

LordKO:
Lol, I knew beforehand that the phrase "even before Nigeria got her independence" would horrify you.

Stay blessed.

Stay blessed also.

faithfull18:
You too

What happened to me ma?

Hathor5:
How can you type this and ...



... a few minutes this?

He dislikes the fact that women occupy the jobs in the offices.
It is contemptuous to believe that men deserve the jobs because women are supposed to stay at home.
And yes, the notion that women are the housekeepers in marriage is prejudiced. It has been built on a belief. Men can equally keep a home or she the responsibility of keeping it like women can share the financial burden and have been doing so since time immemorial.

@Bold:

I have nothing further to discuss with you.

Enjoy your day.

1. Someone chased you, you did not give him face.
2. He left the house, you started grinding another man
3. He let you be, you are crying.

What do you want sister Nengi?

Anyways, I see Laycon to the rescue.

LordKO:
Mama de mama, who's been making sense even before Nigeria got her independence; Happy Sunday.

Ha! Abeg o! I am still a very young lady .

Happy Sunday to you also.

It is easier for me to answer all mentions in a post that type similar thoughts four times. [b][/b]

Misogyny is defined as dislike of, contempt for, or ingrained prejudice against women:

I am yet to see where the OP expressed a case of dislike, comtempt or ingrained prejudice against women in his OP. He said Government should regulate jobs women get. The next question is why? So that:
1. Men would get better jobs so they can effectively cater for the home financially;
2. Women would have more time for housekeeping which is their forte.

What in the above reasoning expresses misogyny?

Or is this is case of everything looking like a nail because all we have is a hammer?

Or is the notion that women are the housekeepers in a marriage prejudiced?

EVERY system has its merits and demerits. EVERY! With that in mind, humans 'ideally' pick whatever system poses the least demerits (due to the information they have or life experiences).

@Biglittlelois:
1. If you agree that traditionally, a man wins the bread while the woman keeps the house, what model do you propose to tackle the OP's observations?
2. You obviously did not understand the competition I referred it. You can re-read that portion of my post;
3. Your point 7 is a demerit of the OP's proposal which I expected posters to bring out in an objective manner;
4. In a marriage setting, women are naturally equipped to keep the home which is different from doing chores. To break down, home keeping is strategy while chores is the tactics. Men do chores; women do chores and keep the home.
4. Your point 10 is back to my introduction; where did the OP's post state selfishness/disdain/envy for women?

@Cococandy:
Government enforced jobs (which would be better executed at university stage {You can't read certain courses} although sounds like a nightmare in a capitalist economy) means some men are also not getting the jobs they want. I heard of a teacher who was so passionate about teaching that he did not get married. When he died, his students buried him in an elaborate ceremony. Some fathers ensured their sons went to that school so they could be mentored by 'Mr. X' In a society where Govt assigns jobs per gender, Mr. X would have missed out on his calling. It is not always about women in an individualistic manner.

@Hathor:
Follow the discussion. In traditional setting, If a man is to fend for the family, then it is implied that the wife (if earning) would use the money for personal needs. Hence the saying 'His money is our/my money and my money is my money.'

@Miarose:
I struggle to understand the direction of your post. This is not about 'my generation'. I guess it is a 'gift' these days to discuss a topic objectively, acknowledging the merits and demerits and chose what works for you at each stage of your life..

I remember in Primary School when we had to debate 'Lawyers are better than doctors' or 'Mothers are more important than fathers'. Both parties (for and against) managed to marshall their points with the concluding (Hope I was able to convince and not confuse you that bla bla bla).

I hope that skill is not lost and all parties (for and against) can bring their points objectively to the table.

Double post.

Gerrard59:
I understand your concerns. A similar thread was made more than seven years ago and I disputed with the OP then. Well, I was woke then and a self acclaimed feminist. Thank God for increased knowledge. The solution is to continually improve your skill set. It's capitalism.





Simple capitalism. Are you ready to do the work they do?



Please relocate to North Korea. We're living in a largely capitalist society, it should be practiced 100%. No shifting of the goalpost.

@bold:

Cheers to increased knowledge.

11thGoldTREE:
women have more alluring nature than men now. that's why

Alluring?

Hathor5:
I agree with most of what you said but the bold part. It's not a matter of opinion. Let's call a spade a spade. If a person asks for the government to limit women's opportunities in the name of tradition then tradition has become misogyny. Misogyny defined as the dislike of women's freedom to choose how to live their lives and run their families and the contempt for women's various talents and contributions to society as a whole.

Next thing you will read is that women should have no right to education because they are supposed to learn how to clean and cook so that OP, who is possibly less qualified to do a particular job, will not have to put in the necessary work to succeed but be accorded with some privilege in the name of tradition.

If I decide to open a thread on which I will call for the government to put laws in place that will require families to enroll their kids into creches once they are one year old so that women go and work in order to let's say boost the economy, the 'traditional folks' will cry wolf and cite the human rights charter up and down. This is when they will remember that human rights are also the rights of women (and men) to choose how to run their lives and families.

@Bold, must be an updated definition of misogyny.

KingsDisease:
Na where I Bleep up

Since you decided NOT to respect yourself and solicit sex from her, enjoy your disrespect.

You have not controlled and respected yourself, you are looking for respect.