₦airaland Forum

J111333:
Ebube haff cheated severally but here he is, putting his loyal babe of 3yrs to test.
Ebube odogwu.

Ybaby:
Joker!

Omar09:
Howdie anyway?

Klass99:
It's not about the role but the personalities involved.

The female ones I have encountered don't spill jack about stuff they know.

There's one in particular who is as hard as nails, if you held a knife to her neck she still won't share info, if you don't need to know.

I'm sharing my personal experience this is not a gender something, no one should come for my head o abeg.

Johntemmy:
I am married for over 5yrs now, I love my wife so much and my family. But I don't know what is going on btw my wife and my kid brother(close relative but not sibling), it all started 2016, my brother school in the same State and town am living, he always come around for weekend at my place, and I noticed they get close, I was happy about it.
When i got transferred to work in another State, I started coming home on weekends too, until my wife got sick and I asked my brother to go there and stay with her because he's also on holiday, I think that was how they got so intimate I like the way they play and gist a lot, I was transferred back 2017. but what giving me concern about this' is, whenever he's not around they always talk on phone, video chat, sometimes send pictures to each other, my wife will sometimes block me from viewing her WhatsApp status when she put him there, because I had complained ones about why she used so much romantic words for him. She will always excuse to go and talk to him, when I ask why? she'll say private discussion, I really don't feel comfortable but I think I shouldn't jump into conclusion.
I'm not a heavy eater but my brother is, my wife always give him larger portion, I don't mind but when it's meat, my wife gives him the best meat in the soup, bcoz we always eat together on the same dinning table, I feel uncomfortable & disrespected with this, but I didn't talk, but recently I was checking through my brother phone and saw one of his pics that he took 2018 and unknowingly and unware my wife was sitting down behind him, exposing her breast because of the ordinary singlet she was wearing because she's inside the house but my brother kept this picture since then, I ask him why didn't he delete it, he said "i like it, I don't feel convenient with how my wife shows on it, I ask why he couldn't crop her out of the pics, he keeps giving excuses so i deleted it, and he was mad at me. But this had been a point of concern for me, I don't know what to think and how to handle this....
Please mature minds only! Thanks.
from LIFE MATTERS NIGERIA.

subtlemee:
a cow doesn't know the usefulness of its tail till it is cut off and flies starts to feast on the ears .....guys are not even enough for us here you want to come and use abroad and win them over to your ungrateful neice?

Klass99:
I quite agree to an extent, (in a different scenario though) because the men in my office are so toxic it's unbelievable.

They're the ones who gossip the most and when they have no intel on you to share among themselves, they start to speculate and generate false intel by force.

The situation is worsened by the fact that our HR Manager (a male) runs his mouth like a broken water dam.Private/confidential records are not even safe with him.

This is the second male HR Manager I am encountering, who talks too much and is completely unsuitable for the role/position he holds.

Omar09:
You asked:


So I don't want a partner I can't influence.

Omar09:
I know I don't.

backbone503:
If this stats holds true for Nigeria and other African countries, then I'll say its because most women marry who is ready and not who they love. And when they get into marriage, they soon discover that love (which might be lacking in the union) is the only thing that can truly bind two people together.

thorpido:
Well,I believe your mother dated your father enough to know what kind of man she was marrying.She has also chosen to stay even in the face of all these provocations.
As much as you want peace for your mom,she is the one to decide for herself.
Your business now is to make a way for yourself and move out.You can then bring your siblings with you

Omar09:
That is a hell of a bad market for today's women. In fact, they don't want it.

Unnerve:
Lol @ charging for it. It's a good character to have anyway, the ability to maintain control of one's sexual urges, especially for unmarried men.

But I'm sure married women or even girlfriends hate it when they are not able to use sex as a bargaining chip to get what they desire from the men in their lives.

The stuff is a double-edged sword.
Learn and master it in youth as a man and he will end up being immune to the charms & manipulations of his wife and/or girlfriends.

eyinjuege:
You have just compared a scientific physiological process of pregnancy to a social construct of illegitimacy.
Apples and oranges.
Culture is forever changing, and crimes that were the norm in those days are legal this day and vice versa. E.g Europeans have once in their history married legitimately 14 year olds and younger. Homosexuality used to be a crime in their countries but it is now legitimized in same countries
Children born out of wedlock weren't allowed to inherit in same countries, but that is no longer the case now.

SAMBARRY:
Dapo if you are truly a raap1st may you get the punishment befitting of a raap1st


If the lady is commiting slander,may God expose her and make an example of her


Meanwhile happy wedding anniversary.


Note that I didn't call you dbanj.i love D'banj as an entertainer,I don't like Dapo that much

Rozz:
you are right,the better word is INFLUENCE, that's why it's also safe to do away with any man that follows ubunja,martinez39s and their cohorts here in Nairaland.Any unfortunate lady that falls in their trap will live a bitter life

NerdyRudeGyal:
Good thread.

Rozz:
its never advisable for any lady to marry a man she can't control at least small lol, right?

Unnerve:
There is no distinction between a legitimate and an illegitimate child by Nigerian law, maybe only village people are the ones still differentiating them.

Check the last sentence

Unnerve:
The goal is to weed out average women and only go for exceptional women of character who are not passively trying to control and influence you.

Ladyhippolyta88:
1. In Nigeria the child becomes legitimate once the parents are married. Laws are peculiar to each country and in some countries this might not be an issue for some it might.

2. It is discriminatory and offensive to classify an individual as such and in my opinion.Even the word bastard is an insult and offensive

3. They cannot contest a will written by the parents on such grounds. Only when such parent might have died intestate(without a will) such child may then be able to contest and it depends on the context or facts of the case take for instance the child's existence was acknowledged by the father before death. The child born out of wedlock can get a share of the inheritance.

Ladyhippolyta88:
The child is legitimate even after their marriage.

The child should never be disvlcriminated on the circumstances of his/her birth.

Ladyhippolyta88:
There us nothing like an illegitimate child in today's world.
That is an act of discrimination on the child because the child did not choose how he/she was to be born.
Section 42(2) of the constitution ensures that children are not denied rights or right to inheritance by circumstances of their birth and such child has same rights as others to inherit from their parents as long as they were acknowledged by their parents

chii8:
I also stand with #ALL LIVES MATTERS....Abuse is in so many ways, while some men may be known to abuse physically, some women are experts in emotional abuse and blackmail.The country is a rough war zone,we should try and tolerate our spouses and be patient with them especially when it's an issue that is workable.Marriage is constituted by God, so I believe it will end in praise.God will help us.

Unnerve:
Far from the point.

I'm simply not comfortable with the narrative that a man should be assertive and a visionary because he wants to get a woman. I'd rather he develops himself for himself and only himself.

I bet the OP would not agree that a man should make money because he wants to get a woman. Same principle.

Self-development is entirely for self, which is why there's a self in there.

0neal:
Important and interesting topic

Having a Vision/Purpose for one's life cant be over emphasised, Myles Munroe of blessed memory book "Understanding the Purpose and Power of Men" comes to mind.

Even a book i'm currently reading, written 2017 by scholars claim vision/purpose is a goal, success and life enhancer, and processes like;

1. Seeking counsel from trusted individual
2. Praying
3. Reflecting
helped to establish Vision/purpose in leaders.

Op you provided a link on how to create Vision, it'll be of great help if you do same for assertiveness.

Thanks

CanadaOrBust:
I never said they are connected. I only said it is a more interesting aspect of the male-female dynamic

UAE123:
There is nothing like illegitimate child