₦airaland Forum

cococandy:
Every rape case is usually treated on individual basis.
It’s people who are looking to muddy the waters because they are upset about the number of cases being reported that are to blame here.

I don't agree.

When we start to define 'she/he said no after MouthAction' the same with an Uwa or Jennifer's case, you water down people's sensitivity to it.

Omoluabi16:
We need to be very careful now. Because some of these analogies and scenarios will end up watering down the impact of rape and shift our attention from this delicate issue. Let's thread carefully biko.

Gbam!

When I was younger, once you say a man raped a woman, it is treated with a lot of gravity. As in a 'Ha!' crime.

Today, you are thinking, was consent withdrawn after kissing, was it regret sex, etc. etc.

HedwigesMaduro:
After Liz Benson, she's the prettiest Nigerian actress I've ever seen. Cute is not enough to describe her. Not just physically, but the way she acts/talks. So attractive.

Have you watched 'Between' her recent comeback movie?

decatalyst:
He is like "with your bright skin and round eyes, my money will be bright, shine and round the whole earth"

This man brings fear to our TV screen

Hahahahahahahahahaha

If his room was so porous that a lady banging the door could save her, how did he get away with raping 72 women in that same room?

God bless the donor, his/her family and yours.

Amen.

cococandy:
Excellent.



I don’t think this person is being held against their wish in the relationship (or whatever they define it as).
The person who constantly gets a no halfway through the act or feels like they are being punished with NOs can choose to walk away.
He or she will find someone who wants to everything with them. The person constantly saying no can also find someone who does it the way they like. Well enough that they fee like saying no.

Life can be really simple in some aspects.

@ bold:

You are right.

The earlier peeps try to abscond from psychotic people, the better for everyone.

cococandy:
If any of those girls ever said no and/or pushed you away yet you continued and forced your way in, then it was rape. Ignorance doesn’t excuse you from the law.
Your best bet is that none of them comes forward to complain. Which they rarely do anyway.

[b]You guys are acting like the bulk of accusers are women who started having consensual sexual activity with you and then changed their minds after ward. That’s not the case. [/b]the truth is that such ladies will rarely come forward seeing as folks will be ever ready use their initial willingness to tear down their claims.

My advice to you, please kindly stop minimizing the pain of rape victims because you’re trying to prove a point or maybe you’re somewhat scared that some girl from the past might decide to come forward. I can assure you the likelihood of that is low. Now let’s focus on people who are actually coming forward and complaining. Maybe if people listened and let trusted authorities do the investigation, we might get somewhere

The fight against rape on both genders would be greatly helped if people who fall in the bold are separated from other cases.

cococandy:
1. I already answered that. Yes it’s rape. Maybe she was enthusiastic about kissing him. Not about penetration. Not all kisses must end in penis and vagina fusion. You might very well want to kiss someone but not copulate with them. Make and female alike.

2. Maybe he didn’t read the initial enthusiasm wrong. But he sure as hell would be reading to wrong if he continues after she has said NO.

3. Yes she does. very easy to check. You have your mouth wrapped around a dyck and the owner of the dyck starts saying “No. Stop.” Maybe even pushing your head away. What do you want to continue for please? Is it cooked steak that doesn’t have a voice? It’s a human. You make eye contact. Is he enjoying it? Babe can I do it better? Tell me how you like it. More tongue? More saliva? If you’re having consensual sex, you will know when the person is out of the feeling and respect their feeling. It’s basic respect.

4. Absolutely.

1. Obviously not all kisses or smooching ends in sex. I was talking of a specific scenario.

2. Ok.

3. Ok,

4. I think your consent form makes sense since people are no longer able to decide what they want. At least, no one can scream rape when the signed forms are produced.

Post script:
This consent talk has only addressed one side of the coin: respecting the feelings of the person who within action doesn't feel like it anymore. What happens to the other party? What if the person doesn't feel like it half-way all the time, what happens? What if required a party uses lack of continued consent as a punishment?

rockstarB:
Ideally NO, but what I'm seeing all over will make one think its gender based. Like what this guy said, if the role was reversed a woman would tag it rape, especially after a fallout.

The idea of consent has always been female based.

cococandy:
Yes it’s rape. She’s not ready to go all the way that day. Next time try again.

Ask, “are you willing to make out, to engage in pre-intimacy and to eventually have my peniis is your vàgina? If she doesn’t give a convincing and resounding yes, do not continue.

Sounds too technical for a romantic situation? Well maybe that’s what YOU especially have to do since you can’t tell when someone is horrny for you or not.
If someone wants to have sex with you, they’ll have as much enthusiasm as you going into the sex. There will be absolutely no questions. You won’t need to beg, to persuade , to harass etc all those games that some of you play to get sex.

I don’t understand men who sense hesitation, see struggles, hear NOs and still think that they are having an appropriate sexual encounter. Is the need to dip it in at that moment so much more than your need to know that you both thoroughly enjoyed it?

@Bold:

What happens if babe was enthusiastic during kissing, smooching and then the guy starts penetrating and suddenly, the lady says no.

Did he read her initial enthusiasm wrong? Is he supposed to check her enthusiasm per activity?

Does the babe also check his enthusiasm when she is giving him BJ for instance?

Is this consent supposed to work both ways?

PuZZyNegro:
Teaching a guy that he's not entitled to a girl's body and teaching a girl that she is not entitled to a guy's money and favor.

Any girl that's not weary of accepting undeserved gifts is not well brought up and could fall victim of many of these incidents

Infact, you have said it all!

rockstarB:
Yes according to our understanding of rape. I mean if the case was reversed. NO because you allowed her put it in without resisting I might be wrong

The definition of rape is per gender?

lahizak:
My girlfriend came for a sleep over one night. After d 1st round, i got tired and junior went to sleep. She wanted round 2 but i said no, she kept playing with junior. Junior self no rise. She still end up putting sleeping junior into her V.J. once junior enter he got hard and fire. Can i say my girlfriend raped me?

Olorun ko wa yo ninu bilisi.

Angelfrost:
Yes ma...

Honestly, we need to train our kids and youths better, especially males.

Primary and secondary schools should do better sex education, and continuously warn against all forms of sexual assaults...

I sense we are not doing enough as parents, teachers, counselors, clergy, and society!!!

I totally agree with you.

Also if sexual decency is impressed on men, they will know how to say no and accept no from ladies.

Angelfrost:
True... But, that's the part I referred to in the aspect of "being on the same frequency"!!!... If she has a last minute change of mind at the peak of ecstasy, then a guy has to man up, grit his teeth, and go dip his erection in ice!!!

Sigh... At the end of it all, it takes serious self control to back out when walls spring up, and self control is the hallmark of manhood and maturity...

In any case, this is why we religiously preach abstinence!!!

@Bold and healthy common sense boundaries.

That is part of the solution in addition to training boys and girls on comportment, decency and self-control.

toprealman:
Khafi please keep quite. Your story no make sense.
You were straffing on national TV.
Abeg park well.....

How does straffing on national TV negate the fact THAT she COULD have been a victim of rape

[quote author= post=90266751]ALL OF US @ [/b] [b] SAY NO TO RAPE over and over again!!

And as we are SAYING NO TO RAPE, WE ALSO SAY NO TO FALSE ACCUSATIONS OF RAPE.
They are both as DANGEROUS as one another!


#WeDidOurPart

Another COZA episode loading till many months to come..............


Say FORMER, Now repeat after us 'FORMER'...... say the right word and win!!!




SECONDED! [/quote]Going by the 5th point, a drunk person can't rape either.

If a drunk person cannot give consent, then a drunk person cannot rape either.

Nooil:
Yeah, thank you for the tip. The reason I relaxed in the struggle was that it helped me the first time someone tried to do it.

We were struggling, and I realized the more I struggle, the stronger his grip was on my hands. So, I relaxed, like I had given up. The unfortunate being then thought I had become weak, and then tried to commence with putting his mouth on my boobs. It took a flip second for me to throw him down and put my hand on his neck. I almost choked him to death, until he started pleading.

If you're not being gang-raped, I see no reason why a man should easily have his way with you. I'd rather die than let that happen.

@bold:

Hmmmm

Angelfrost:
Not trying to pointlessly dissent from your well written argument, but I still beg to differ...

I have had so many trysts with a lot of ladies since teenage, I have never felt the need to continue once I noticed the slightest hesitation from the lady, least of all when she clearly voiced her negation. It mattered none if I later came off as a fool to her.

Come to even think of it, before I thought about laying hands sexually on a lady, who is not a wh*re I paid for, I would be clearly certain we are both on the same sexual frequency or that the feeling is highly mutual.

Maybe some guys need new or better orientation on this lawful and safe principle especially with this dangerous trend!!!

@Bold:

You need to update your dictionary:

Now, a girl in the bold can claim to be raped if when you start thrusting, she says no and you don't stop.

There has to be consent per time of the act.

Rozz:
You are right but some rapist use that as a means to justify their actions, no entitlement should be attached to anything freely given .

@bold:

Why do you think you are entitled to a random guy's gifts?

Because you are female?

Anyways, I was taught to reject gifts that had no definition especially from men.

I do not want to be indebted to anyone without definition.

Exc2000:
Quranic law (sharia) Laws of Moses , Ifa laws and teachings of other african religion all stated this boundary.. westerners came in to mess everything

Honestly, the craving for freedom without responsibility ruined it all.

This reminds me of boarding school back then. A male seen in female hostel and vice versa is automatically suspended.

No long story, no 'I want to, want to', no 'I mistakenly strolled in'.

No excuses.

Go off the boundary, pay dearly for it.

Imagine the disgrace on the school bus taking you home because you went to girls'/boys' hostel.

Imagine the confusion if boys could go to girls hostel and play with them. How would the matron know when to punish the boy? How would she know when the girls in her care are in danger?

They keep shifting the goalpost of the definition of rape to accommodate the freedom to act foolishly.

Now, you can kiss a guy, he gives you good head and you cum thereafter say he raped you because you didn't give consent after the MouthAction.

Tallesty1:
You worry too much over nothing bro.

This is not worrying over nothing except he decides to abstain.

Marriage does not even give the respite it ought to anymore.

Maybe the whole world needs to burn then we start afresh.

2020 is already doing a good job of it.

This thread is tragically funny.

If both sexes can uphold boundaries pre-freedom to do anything, this thread would not exist.

Like I said in another thread, this would hopefully bring a moral revolution.

Where everyone (men & female) maintain moral boundaries with common sense and decorum so we see who the rapists really are and deal with them very stiffly under the law.

Rozz:
I have a problem with the number 2,gifts in whatever form are freely given and as such not indebted to the giver especially if you made your stands known earlier.

Sister, my people say, 'what you would not eat, you don't smell it.' They also said 'If you collect bribe or unwarranted gifts, you will not be able to say the truth.' This is not gender related only.

If you have a friend who always give you stuffs, it would be harder for you to condemn him or her.

If you are not interested in a guy, no 'let me just visit'. 'let me plan to eat his money and run', 'he invited me for a party' etc. Let your No mean No.

If you don't feel safe around a guy, avoid him.

Our instincts is also there for a reason.

Las, las, they will call you a coward, wear the badge with honour.

Like the OP said, this is not absolving anyone of rape. However, how you would guard your phones, valuables and house against thieves, let us also guard ourselves.

philipstanley:
I blame this on lockdown.

How does lockdown contribute to rape?

Proper investigations should be carried out to know what is really going on.

yomi96:
this is looking like more of a political protest. Unfortunately the blacks are just pawns in the hands of the white political class. This is not the first riot and protest, even during the time of obama. yet no justice or reforms. The democrats knows the fear tactics of painting trump bad will get them votes, but he will still win because he only needs the electoral college votes.

@bold:

Until the blacks understand that, they will still be where they are.

Madness is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.

thorpido:
Op,I think you should go back to that hotel.Hang around there.If you see any tall,fair guy with a big head there[b],go with him to his room and spend time with him.[/b]
You might find the guy if you spend enough time there.

@Bold:

For a bouncing baby boy abi?

This story get as him be.

You mean a lawmaker was scouting Facebook and decided to trace and rape Lizzy for shooking mouth in his family matter?

They better scout all other SM for negative news about him and trace their posters to see if they are ok.

Welcome to the outpouring of rape allegations.

Rape and false allegation of rape need same punishment.

Let the university investigate the allegations accordingly.

This might perhaps be the moral revolution we need.