₦airaland Forum

luminouz:
In my culture, we bring gifts to people we are going to greet.

Is alright

vybzkartel:
I proposed love to this lady, and she said

She is sorry but she can't return the love

I asked if she loves me but she said NO but she likes me

I asked if I should forget about her and she said, ' Let's be friends, anything can happen'

What should a guy do In this kinda situation? Thanks

There is a great difference between like and love

You live her so you can go on with her

She likes you and wants an ordinary relationship probably she may develop love in the process

She is just being open and truthful than pretending to you

luminouz:
Who proposal EPP?

Just tell her you dey come see her parents next week with your folks and some tubers of yam.

You don't need to visit your propose inlaw with tubers of yam

Just visit them the way you are

JovialJune:
So a woman who refused to breastfeed a child that is not hers is a bad mother?

Have you ever seen or heard of a newborn that died of hunger or lack of breast milk?

A newborn is after suckling what will give it food, a newborn cannot differentiate between breast milk or formula because it does not know the difference, no matter how long it cries, it will suckle whatever is given to it as milk,

At op, what you did isn't bad, but I can't do it.

If you read well and understand the content of what you read is about breast feeding a motherless child by another breast feeding woman, who is willing to help another child

That is quite different from a ew born mum who doesn't wants to breast feed her own child

There are two different things here

staceyokon:
Must a Man propose to a Woman on his knees? Many Men of today claim that this western style of asking for a Woman's hands in marriage is being abused by the females.
Others are of the opinion that it's a civilized way to get it done.
So we want to hear your views on the matter; is it a must to propose on your knees to the Woman you love and desire to marry?

There is nothing wrong with that that's his choice and he is not the first

A man can even proposed to a woman while making love to her and feeling high

His concern is for her to accept the proposal not the way he proposed to her

Darlingme:
What's your take on this.

A friend of mine is preparing for her marraiage. She's planning on having a church wedding as well. But the issue is, they had a child together outside wedlock from their University days. ( About 5yrs ago), recently, they decided to live together while they aee making preparations for their marriage. They both desire to have a white wedding.

Do you think they are still qualify/ elligible for church wedding? Especially in a Pentecostal church?
What would you advise?
Your suggestion, recommendation, advice is welcome.

There is no problem at all good enough the child outside wedding belongs to both of them

If their church refuses to wed them, let them start going to another church

Foodqueen:
Ya right, can you I just did.

Her mom passed yesterday and she has refuse to eat anything. Her father and two women came to beg me to help and I gladly did. I even told them I will always be ready to help. The man couldn't say I word but was teary all thru. I am fulfilled.
He even offered money as a thank you but I declined

Can you

A good mother will breast feed another child especially where the mum passed away

It gives the woman sense of fulfillment that you didn't allow a motherless child to die of hunger

Pls one more thing, start introducing formula for the baby even as you help to breast feed the child

Darhmmy:
We used to be lovers back in uni , We broke up at some point and lost contact. Earlier this year we reconnected at a party and it was obvious we still had feelings for each other.

We started dating and everything seemed nice at first. He never told me he was married. After months of dating , i started to get suspicious as he wouldn't let me visit his home , instead he was always coming to mine and meeting up at hotels. We had a big fight about it and he finally told me the truth. He kept on pleading and asking that we continue dating. I couldn't even leave if I wanted to, I was in love with him.

I am 2 months pregnant and he has been avoiding me. He calls just once in two days and has told me to do whatever I want with the pregnancy , that he is fine with my decisions. I want to keep him and the baby and I'm scared he may ghost up on me. Last night I found his wife and some of his relatives on Facebook and I want to send them texts about it. I really need advise on this.

You don't need to embarrass the wife by breaking the news of the pregnancy to her, it will not solve any problems

You have the option to keep the pregnancy and be a baby mama for him for life, meaning he owns the pregnancy but will definitely not marry you. Are you ready for this ?

Alternatively do with the pregnancy and learn to live your life with out him forever

But if after all these, you decides to continue the relationship with him, you will be the greatest looser because he can never drop his family for anyone

Thanks be to God for early detection and successful surgery with treatment

Franzinni:
Blood of your own for a land unknown.

I see why many igbos prefer to live outside their own land.

This is all shades of wrong.

Point of correction
Igbos lives outside their own town just like other tribes and hustle to make money

DavidNative:
Need Advice Pls

Good Day, everyone, am having a serious challenge in my marriage, been married for a year and was no Premarital sex, since I need to promise her am a faithful guy and based on religion ground….

But honestly even in the marriage, it has been one sided, she said my private part is to big and I stay too long, I do every for her, love her, care for her, help her in kitchen, setup a home business/career for her to save her the stress of going out. I give her head, sometimes I suck and engage in pre-intimacy for long , but many times, since we had gotten married, I am the only active person, sometimes for a month no sex, am getting frustrated, I need advice.
Everytime i try to discuss it, she say i should try to understand that she is nott the sex type. Am tearing apart on my inside. What can i do pls

You really know that you are big down there and you should know that not every woman wants it big down there

Assuming you guys were having sex during courtship, she would have seen it a D either stay with it or pull out

But you dodged that part, expecting her to accept it the way it is

Well, that single part alone is enough to discourage her from sex due to pains and discomfort

You have to look for Al alternatives so that when she can't stand it, you get it else where

Men that are big down there, dates women that lives sex and ready to accommodate the size

Yseone:
Dear Nairalanders, please i will be brief on this as i need your advice and suggestions.
I am a young man who has been planing to settle down with the girl i have prayed for over 3 years for God to reveal toe if she's my wife and i her husband, God actually answered that prayer and showed us both that we are meant for each other.
Fast forward to 2019, while we were chatting via WhatsApp, I asked her for her Genotype and she said it's AA, after about 5months or so, I asked her again claiming to have forgotten just for me to be so sure, she sent the results to me again showing AA for the two times she had ran the test, then she asked me for mine and i told her it's AS because i knew this right from when i got admission to higher institution and secondly when i got my first job because media l was conducted and this was between 2008 and 2016 same thing with her.
Just last month we approached the church to officially inform them about our intentions to get married and we were scheduled to run a test in a military hospital in PortHarcourt, which we did and the result came out last Sunday and the church called me to come collect the result after Sunday service, brethren lo and behold, our results came out AS & AS���� and I quickly called her to rerun her test again in Enugu where she base and yesterday, the result came out AS again.
I was shocked as the girl broke down I'm tears. It has not been easy on both of us, Marriage list has been collected and I'm about to pay the bride price.
Please i need advice as somethings have already been done concerning this marriage
Your advice please.[color=#006600][/color]

You guys need to meet your personal family doctor and run the test together with out telling the doctor your past test results

Whatever you guys get, you accept your faith

But if it's negative and you don't want to loose her, you can be married and you guys will have a child through surrogacy or adoption

The strength of your love will help you guys if you choose the later

krebdawise:
I lost my brother on Wednesday, he was just done with his project defence last week in AAUA... And he moved to my place in Akure on Monday, hoping to relocated soon.

We both sleep together and gist till 11pm, and suddenly he shouted from his sleep; before I could rush him to hospital, he was pronounced dead....


My mom is not stable now...

Please I need prayers...my fellow Nairalanders

What a sudden death for youth, may his soul rest in peace and may God be with your family

Barrister026:
My dad called me on the phone 2 days ago asking if I be coming home for the holiday, which is unlikely of him, because I just left home not quite long and he hardly call. (I school within our state, studying law)..... while we were on the call he mentioned about the Dr appointment. (We normally do routine check-up every 2 months )

Throwing the question to me if I even know my blood group. (I replied, no)
At FIRST I thought it's just a normal question.

Am 21yrs old, eldest among 3 siblings and I think my dad has something planned out, he's an Internet freak even more than I, he's actively online on twitter, facebook, and seeing all the uproars about DNA test here and there on Nairaland, I think he's going to ask me to come to the hospital with him disguising it as me Knowing my blood group (for a DNA test.)

The thing here is am scared, because all my life I have seen people saying never to trust a woman (I love my mom, but still am scared)

What if it's a DNA test (which I strongly believe it is)
What if it's turns out complicated
Would he still accept me? Or abandon me to myself.
So many thoughts running through my head, they are reasons for that.

He's black, I am fair (though my mum says I took his father complexion)


Pls help me...am thinking to stay back in school or go home This evening.
Am confused.

If he requests for a DNA test when you comes home, ask him what for

If at this his old age he wants to hear a news that will break his heart, let him go ahead

But I think he wants you to accompany him for check up

agbolahan1991:
Thank u bro

Sis pls

Offpoint1:
I honestly hate making calls, I hardly call ANYONE, in fact the last I spoke with my mom was 6 months ago... Is worse with my siblings and relatives. I can go a year or more without calling them.

I don't pick any call I didn't expect, neither do I return missed calls.

I hate sending people wishes, be it on social media, text or physical.
All my social media handles are in ghost mode, except my business WhatsApp.

I hardly reply messages on my personal WhatsApp line.

Although I get really busy most times, but I don't
think it's an excuse enough. I've tried changing, but it isn't working.

It seems the only place I reply to people is on Nairaland, I've never clicked a "Like button" on the internet before... I have phobia for it.

How can I adjust? I spend 99.99% of my free time Alone in a quiet place soul traveling to universe.

You are living in your own world ald you don't want people to disturb you also you are proving that your are just comfortable with the way you are and ca t find it easy relating with people

But I can see that you are active on your business WhatsApp probably because you earn something from it

But bear in mind that communication is the key

Lack of communication is like staying in the darkness in a hole

Efe42:
I'm 26 she's 25

It's either you be prepared to give her attention women loves attention

Or you start reading more about celebrities just to flow with her gist

silentvoice:
This appearance has been on my private part for as long as I can remember. It doesn't itch except when I shave on some occasions. I'm a 23 years female and not sexually active, is there a way for me to clear this? Does anyone have experience on what this is? I also keep having reoccurring boils close to my vagina

Is because you shave yourself, especially when you use razor

anochuko01:
So na only kyari police get?

Truth be told, he was just a special person for most difficult task

Lostchild:
I refuse to help a needy pregnant woman because I am running from my real self. Yes, I needed to save my peace and sanity

In 2018, I move to a new place, a married woman with children started and always comes to meet me to give her whatever she wants from me which I always do. One day, the husband came to me with anger, and told me to stay away from his wife. I said, OK.

Even If i use common sense - helping people I know has landed me in too many conflicts, they are just too over many for me to overlook anymore.

Because of the many years of constant betrayals that lead me to regret my life, I move to a new town and decide to start afresh. In the past I have shown too much financial care and love for women that backfire and work against me. so I decide to stay focus on myself for the first time of my life.

After living in this new place for about six months, a pregnant woman who also live in the same visinity ask me to help her. She told me to lend her some money.

She told me that, she had not eaten since morning and she wants to cook something to eat and her hubby is out of town and will be back later.

She told me she will refund me when her hubby comes back. She was pregnant, hungry and need help.

I badly wanted to but I instantly had many flash back and I told her, I don't have the money right now. I told her, why can't you go and meet that your fellow business woman down there? she may be able to help you, she replied me with God forbid.

The money she asked me, I have it in my base, three times over but I refuse to give her. I painfully refused to help her because nigeria society has made me look like a fool.

To save my peace - I just have to only help strangers and not give help to the people I know

Did I do wrong?

What do you think?

If you want to help people especially women, stay away from married women
No one will believe that you are just helping

Metrix147:
Previous thread: https://www.nairaland.com/6776591/corporal-nwachukwu-dismissed-police-set



https://abntv.com.ng/2021/09/court-remands-ex-police-officer-cpl-nwachukwu-for-allegedly-raping-abia-poly-student/

If all vices, you a police officer took to rape
Why not collect bribe and use the money to satisfy your self if you can't hold yourself
Women are just every where

agbolahan1991:
Her husband has been away for almost a month, I feel pity though have been having a crush on her right from before she got married, now she has a shop beside our office and I can't get my heart off her each day I see her....

Am a married man too but my wife gives me hell, with her anger, bad mouth and ojukokoro
Am not happy as a married man and I really need someone I can talk to, open up to and someone that can relieve the pain in my heart..

If not for your wife attitude, I don't think you will want to date a married woman

Though you find happiness being with her

Just bear in mind that you are dating a married woman and it will not last too long

You can still pull out and look for a matured unmarried woman to date

The most important thing you need is a matured woman who will love you and give you peace

Men believes that you are a man and you should struggle in whatever way, do far it's genuine

But they will rather help women because of love and
affection

Sex may come in, once it goes beyond their levels

bobontop:
My wife is fond of kissing my 6months boy in the mouth. I personally don't like this and I have told her to stop it but she refused.

This issue in causing a serious argument in my home and I want to take a serious action since she has refused to stop it.

Please I need advice from experienced parents.

I was abused sexual as a child by a cousin staying with us and there are cases of incest around me. I don't want any of this to happen to my son.

The teenage girl staying with us always sees my wife kissing my son in the mouth and I am afraid she my copy it and start doing it.

Please am I wrong? Am I over reacting? Is it a normal practice? Please advise me.

For the fact that toddlers have the softest lips doesn't mean that she should suck him

You have to be tough on her about it till it gets to neighbors ear

Haba, she is not doing the right thing

constance500:
I have tried a lot of browsers in the past with the like of uc browser, Chrome, Firefox and the likes, never liked opera browsers for once but chrome has been misbehaving recently, not loading pictures and some other notables fails so I decided to download another one today and after looking around on app store, I finally opted for OPERA TOUCH and damn this is what I've been looking for..
Very fast and smooth, friendly UI

So tell us which browser you're using?

UC Web

Accident on top of third wife marriage

It can't be ordinary

abisoye2:
Nairaland has always been a place of resort when it comes to finding lasting solution to one's problem/albatross as this platform is beclouded with cerebral intellectuals.

==> I am a young man of 27 years old from an average background. I'm currently outside the country earning little above #200k doing blue colar job in one of the Emirates of UAE. I have NCE certificate in one of the Colleges of Education in Nigeria of which I intended to further into Degree(BSc) in Nigeria before travel opportunity showcased which I obliged.
However, I wish to migrate to one the European countries preferably through study route(as one of the easy way to migrate) so as to acquire my Degree(Bsc, because I have great passion for education) and to improve my life(you understand) before considering anything else.

I have been saving larger portion of my salaries to around #2.7m which is not enough for my plan but i'm still managing my work and still saving to actualize my plan with the help of God.

Sorry I forgot to tell you intellectuals that I'm the only Son among 6 children and I'm sinlge. Now, my mother back home is trying to tell me to start a building project on our vacant land and indirectly proposing 'getting married' to me as the larger part of her prayers when discussing on phone is how God should give me a good woman, the loving woman...(you know African Mothers').
It's good to note that my elder sisters have birthed children so Mum is already a "Grandma". I tried to explain to her politely that my plan is not to marry now or spending my little money on building a house only to halfway and continue struggling and saving from scratch rather to develop myself first and then money will come with it and I can now consider marriage afterwards.

I Also think about business but I think it's risky. Also, marrying and leaving my wife back home doesn't sit well with me and bringing her here making family wouldn't be easy as maintaining family is expensive here and there is no child benefit/support compared to the west. Perhaps taking care of my widow mother and taking care of wife/family and sometimes relatives wahala from my paltry salary is striking fear into my bone marrow.

So, getting married now/starting a building project would take away my money and might shatter my plans.

Great Nairalanders, please I am confused, advise me, come to my rescue!

Admin, please help my life by pushing this for me. E dakun!

For the fact that you ate her only son, she wants you to get married and birth a child that will be part of your father's family, because your sisters children belongs to another man's family but still part of your family indirectly

So if you want to marry, make it clear to your partner that you will have to be shuttling home and Dubai because you are yet to get settled and may wish to relocate down to Nigeria after studies or go to Europe if you find a genuine way

The essence of this is for her to be aware of her stand, so that in the future she won't pressure you that she wants to come over

The issue of building, that will come at a stable time, you can't still renovate your father's house and it will look modern

That will be enough till you are able to demolish it and start to build a more befitting house

She wants to back and carry your own child which realy belongs to her husband family, your own father

neonly:
Am not good writer please trying to make it short

Everything just falling apart in my house
Sometimes I hear some folks saying I will tolerate rubbish in marriage but honestly it easier say than done if it actually happen to you
Where did I get it wrong sef
We use to be good friends before church matter enter
Now she does nothing in the house
I go to work come back to go to market and cook clean the house wash the children uniforms for the younger ones

All she is interested now is her own career
What my fate when I grow old
Is this not a red flag for me
What will be the fate of my wonderful innocent children how will they feel not growing up with their mother and father together all these are pounding in my head
the issues are too much I can't type it all am really depressed but sha life goes on
But my children what will be their fate

You don't have to kill yourself for nothing

Do the ones you can do and the ones you can't do, leave it for God

Worst case, you send her back to her father's house, if you know that you can do without her, then you take care of the children