Omoluabi16: Marriage as we all know is the coming together of two families. But down the line, especially when children start coming, there seem to be this choice by default to love and and dislike one side of the family- Mother's side or Father's side. The paternal family is most of the times disliked distrusted or actually hated. I once came upon a poll where over 90% of respondents gave a negative view about their fathers side. Some believe the 'Village people' are definitely from that side. One way or the other, we are also a paternal family too.Feeling the same negative vibe. So what could be responsible for this?
Simply jealousy
They don't want your own family to be greater than their's
That's where you see jealousy in competitions and cold wars in practises
Bawal: Due to some challenges, i and my wife are staying in one room self con and her 30 year old sister has been staying with us for some months now, my wife is older than her by three years.Making love has been challenging since then even though the sister puts bed on the floor and sleep,most time when we assume she is asleep and engage in the act,i will later observe that she is not sleeping,though she will maintain as if she is sleeping and this is constituting an uneasy environment. In fact most time she knows when we are doing it. We are very uncomfortable over the act and she is not moving out from the house soonest.Though she is an adult that such may not sound strange to her,but indirectly seeing or hearing the sound on when i am performing duty on her elder sister makes us feel uncomfortable especially when we see one another in the morning after the act.
Please whats the right way to manage this situation. Advise please.
This is a very simple case, discuss with your wife and both of you will seat her down and tell her that you want to get an accommodation for her because the house is small for all of you
Let her know thst it's a room you are getting for her and after the expiration she should take it up from there
Look we have to learn to speak out and free our worries
Forget about how families will react, if its not ok for them, let them handle it and sort it out their ways
FinewineNg: Thank you. Reporting to his family or anyone is completely out of the picture as it will be seen as "shaming my husband". At least with nairaland, I am completely anonymous and I know I can get some help here.
Regarding the porn thing, sadly for me, I am not into Masturbation thingy. I don't enjoy it. I like to be worked on by a man.
Rogosa: A friend of mine asked me this question and I was dumbfounded for a minutes. He said and I quote," In an heated argument with ur wife, you wanted to rushed out of the room and u now discovered she has locked up both the bedroom and the sitting you. What would you do?"
And my friend is a high temperament person. He said, he tried hard not to lay a hand on her and he asked me that question of what I will do. I have to throw the question here for the judge and judges, elders and chiefs, state men and women on this street.
Make una come out ooo
If truly they are married and under that hot argument she locked you up
Don't beat her, that alone will put all the blames of the argument on you
Just pin her down on the bed and make love to her, that she will cum and sleep off, all you need to do is locate the key and go out to relax
By the time you come back all of you will be looking at each other, then you can settle it out through dialogue
Men should learn to handle women in a way that her madness will be tamed
Well she is talking sense in the sense that, at times in a woman's life, they just get tired of everything about relationships and instead of messing around, just do it and get satisfied
It's still better for women taking masturbating as it doesn't really affects their life the way it does for men
In men it affects their nerves down their and by the time it's use to it, it will be the only way it goes
When it's time to get it normal the erection becomes difficult to attain because it's not use to it
But for women it's a good go, just that she may feel she doesn't need a man again
Mrunityshow: As a man, if you don’t marry a virgin, I am sorry, you will never have a home- Nigeria man say
Nigerians man who is popularly known for his preaching against immortality, took to his Facebook account to give full explanation on having a happy home.
His statements was based on getting married and having a happy home.
According to the Nigeria preacher if any man want to have a happy home,
Pls, I'll love to seek for relationship advice from relationship expert.
I just met a girl not more than two weeks now. I recently ask her out yesterday where she openenly told me that "she can't date me". I ask her her reasons but she said "she has no reasons". Pls, is it advisable to continue asking her out until she agrees or I should just move on with my life?? Note, she only said NO to me once.
Meanwhile, this said girl is way below my class and level that I should start running after her like one mumu. Na manage I wan manage am before o!
What do you think, pls?
Only for mature minds, pls!
Her no means no, yet you want to keep trying and you said she is not your class
If you can still reach your biological father, let him do a DNA test and if it comes out positive, meet him to tell you why he and your mother did what they did to you
After that, dust it and adjust to your new family and move on
SaChither: Hello Nairalander, My Friend Took The Blue Pill, And Refuse To Know His Girlfriend Age. After 7 Month Into The Relationship, He Find Out The Girl Is Four Years Older Than Him. And As A Guy Man He Is Not Ready For Marriage Now, Or In The Next 7 Years. But He Love The Girl Die. As A Friend I Advice Him To Leave The Babe Because I Think He His Wasting His Time, Or What Do U Guys Think?
The main issue here is that he is not ready to settle down on the next seven years not just the age of the woman involve
Cyphrr: Pls I need your advice on this. I got into a relationship with this girl months back she’s loyal and all that but her character I was beginning to find out was absurd, she doesn’t believe ladies should take care of themselves, the other day I told her my friend is getting married to his girlfriend, she was now like what is he doing for work I said his working in a hotel, so she said is it that hotel work he I’ll use to Take care of the lady and treat her that how much are they paying him sef is it 35k he’s earning mtcheww, I told her do not despise the days of little things, she saw I was getting irritated with her then she said any way na way, m a quite person and I observe people and their behaviors a lot this isint the first time this is happening, anytime I bring up a topic about my friend or anybody she ask first what work is the person doing, person that’s talking like this can’t even buy card 1k for herself o, the worst part yesterday I said let me question this person that’s always yabbing boys that don’t have work, I asked about her 2 elder brothers she said they were in school, so I fired, what work is your elder brother doing she reluctantly said he’s a hustler and a student, good I asked what hustle Does he do she said she doesn’t know!! I know that her brother is jobless and doesn’t even have a job and is claiming yahoo boy, but e sweet me that at least am giving her a taste of her own medicine, I asked about the younger brother too she said she doesn’t know I was beginning to wonder how someone won’t know the class their sibling is in but I left it, then I asked about their age she said doesn’t know, I knew she was Lying cause she knows they are old men and still in school 27 25 or so and they have nothing doing, she still denied knowing what level they are in, you can imagine, your brothers that stay In the same house with you, after that this morning I told her I would love to kiss her, naso the babe talk say her body is the temple of god that I can’t touch kiss or even do anything, e shock me o, so I said, you know your lips is the temple of God but it was not a temple when it was eating my chicken and ice cream with pizza e reach now e become temple abi. apart from that she doesn’t really take anything serious, I can be saying something that’s bothering the relationship now so we could settle it and not get on anyone’s nerve again she will be like ehh! continue saying your mind nahh, deep down I’ll be wondering if this this girl can’t say something Tangible and reasonable or contribute anything for us to move forward, after all these I just used style to end the whole charade, all the bosses in the house she’s been calling me since I no wan pick should I let her back in, no sex o no even touching of breast nothing nothing atall.
She is yet to experience life in reality, she still believes in what she sees in her dread as true pictures of life
She is till having the feelings that women are to be taken care off, not even when men of these days are looking for a woman who works who is prudent and ready for a team work approach
The economy is too hard to consider some one who doesn't believe the present economic situations
Ladies who are not doing anything tangible doesn't appreciate any amount spent on them
But the ones who are doing something no matter how little it is appropriates every kobo spent on them
rawpadgin: Okay, was having a drink with a friend of mine last night & he told me he no longer find his fiancée attractive. They got engaged a year ago & the babe is already pregnant for him. He is however still planning to wife her because the girl is a wife material & he will grow further financially with her by his side but believes he might be cheating on her after marriage.
According to him, the said girl has done a lot for him mostly during the pandemic period but believes he shouldn't be getting married to a girl simply because she has assisted him on many occasions. All my effort to convince him that the feelings will come after marriage proved abortive.
As good as he portrays the girls attitude, I can't see why the sudden change in affection
Probably because she is pregnant or what
Well, he who wants to cheat will definitely cheat and its no longer an issue
For the fact that he sees success staying with her, let him go on, with time what ever that has been manipulating his brain over her will run away
Nothing is balanced in this life, if the whole fingers in the hand are not equal, what else do you think should balance
Ningen: Your husband has not even acknowledge that he has a problem. I mean the fact that he's not even bothered at all signifies that he's not ready to accept necessary changes to his lifestyle.
You need to make him see and accept he has a problem. Do whatever you can to make him visit a doctor together before anything. Only then.
Such men are so stubborn and proud of themselves
He won't even accept he has a fault talk more of going to a doctor
FinewineNg: Please ooo help. What is the tested and trusted solution to Premature ejaculation? My husband doesn't last 5 secs during sex. Immediately he penetrates me, he just cums just like that when I am preparing to enjoy the show. This have been going on for months and he isn't bothered. The other time his di#&k was inside me and it went flaccid.
He says there is nothing wrong with him.
He doesn't kiss, he is not the romantic type, even to play with my nipples is a big job for him.
I am frustrated to the point I am always Hot 247. My v. Jay is always wet. I need to be made good love to. For 2 months now, no sex, he just masturbates in the middle of the night while watching p@rn on his phone (he is a porn addict and heavy hemp smoker).
I told him we should see our family Doctor but he insisted there is nothing wrong with him.
I have a healthy sexua l libido and I enjoy pre-intimacy nd se x alot but here I am, starved, frustrated, constantly dripping and hungry for it. We have 4 kids and my libido increased after child bearing. I'm in my middle thirties and he is is his mid forties.
I am a 100% clean woman and I maintain very healthy oral and general body hygiene so its not a case of me being a dirty woman.
[/b]Nairalanders please what healthy treatment options are available, where can we get it?[b]
Help me. I can't sleep with another man.
Thank you for your suggestions.
Am glad you already have children
It Seems he is not bothered about his poor sexual prowess
He does alot of masturbation that's why he can't really have a good erection
You too, you can't kill yourself, since you don't want to mess up outside your marriage, get on with your own porn and sort yourself out
You can't remain the way you are, just watch and get satisfied
Even if you report him to his family, they will say you have gotten kids naw, what else do you want
They won't understand that your sexual life needs to be attended to especially now that you are done with kids
Melodriod: This is my first reasonable post on nairaland �... I don't really know what the comments would be like but man gotta do what he gotta do �
So here's the story, I'm a single guy and I've been putting an eye out there looking for someone to love and call my own, so i met this really beautiful nice young lady a month ago and its was more like love at first sight kinda of thing...but i just had to maintain so i don't appear being desperate and all... But truth is am madly in love with this girl, we've been talking ever since then and so far we are becoming more closer as each day passes.
I still haven't asked her out to be my girlfriend but I'm really hopeful that she will say yes to me considering how close we have become lately, we talk about everything and anything.
So to the main gist, currently her smartphone is bad so we can't do things like chatting, whatsapp calls, video calls and the likes... And i feel like getting her a smartphone would greatly be helpful to her as well as get us to communicate more often, so I'm thinking....Is it wise to get her a phone at such an early stage into our relationship (friendship) considering the fact that i haven't asked her and she hasn't said yes to me....
I just feel like she really needs a smartphone and I'm thinking if i should get her one... I've not really made up my mind yet, might sound crazy but I'll really like to get opinions on this..
For the fact that you are thinking of getting a phone for her, it's love that is pushing you
Get it for her if you can afford it and get sometime that is less expensive so that if by tomorrow the relationship doesn't work out, then you didn't lose much but am sure it will work out
Just bear in mind that you will not control the use of phone with her neither will you insist on having the password
It will be childish and you end up provoking yourself
YoungandDepress: My story is quite a sad and long one. I wish I could write it all out. My life has been a terrible mess. Where did it go wrong for me, I have no idea.
I am writing with so much emotion, my heart is full and heavy. Life is bitter.
I am a 23 years old guy. My life all started to go in the negative direction when I gained admission at age 16. A 16 years old boy in the university, so much freedom and exposure. I messed up my life, I became addicted to bet9ja virtual gambling I lost focus, Gambling killed me, I started failing exams, at the end I dropped out without my parents Knowing, but the truth came out when I was supposed to graduate, I could not hide it anymore. I told them the truth, my parents forgave me like the prodigal son.
They still believed in me especially my mom, she keeps reminding me of how intelligent I used to be.
Well I'm not here to talk about my past life but here to talk about how it is still affecting me today.
Ever since I started university all over again, I have been miserable and frustrated. Nothing has been working in my favour. I'm currently now in 200level hoping to graduate before 25. All my mates I started with have done their NYSC.
I'm still stuck in the same stage. I have no idea what I am doing with my life. I'm young, broke and depressed. I get irritated over little things. I feel disgust at how I uselessed my youthful life. How gambling destroyed me.
By the grace of whichever god exists, I am no longer addicted to gambling. I have quit the addiction for almost a year now but nothing changed, I still feel miserable. I hate having people around me even my family members including my mom.
I have no true friends. Nobody checks on me, nobody calls me.
At this age, I can't boast of having 500 naira in my account. I'm broke and miserable.
I have started hating God and question my belief in God. I hate Sunday's. I hate hearing about God, I don't blame God for my troubles but I'm angry at the fact that despite my parents being dedicated Christians, things are not working well in my family. My elder ones are graduates, but no solid job yet.
Only my eldest brother who is doing quite well now and I thank God for his life but we don't talk. I can't remember the last time I called him on phone. They don't hate me, I hate myself. I have disappointed them a lot.
I just lost the last #1000 I had in my life today and I cried. The money fell out my pocket when I went to get something.
At 23 years, I have no idea what I will do with my future. I still live with my parents and I have never rented an apartment of my own even in school.
What is wrong with me, why am I miserable?
I have no good clothes. My clothes are all worn out. I have nothing doing, i live off my parents.
Since schools were shut down, I have been at home doing nothing. Completely broke, damaged and miserable.
Can my life be any better. What do I do. I am depressed. I keep asking myself these questions but there Seem to be no answer.
you know y
You don't have to lose hope because the journey is still far and the earlier you get set for the journey the quicker you will get there
Buckle up and be yourself
You are still in track, just make up your mind to be happy
Go close to your mum to give you words of encouragement
Go close to hid he wants to know that he us your supreme God
Get a Bible and read from chapter to chapter, yes I mean it
Your situation is very simple because you are the one attacking yourself
Family › Re: Why Is The Paternal Family So Disliked? by frozen70(f): 9:45pm On Aug 07, 2020
