₦airaland Forum

Not all big girls you see are adults. Ask for age before you continue.

Not all people dressed like a woman are truly women. Some Trans will look more beautiful than real women. Ask about gender at birth before you continue.

This is for my guys.

Onolulu:
My friend (32) is a single father of one in Nigeria with somewhat okay career in Nigeria. Few months ago, he hinted me about a lady he has been talking to who resides in Canada, but she is a Nigerian but now has Canadian citizen. They met online and the conversation has been decent and fruitful. The lady in question is single and she is 38yrs. According to what he told me, the lady has been in search of a partner to no avail. My friend is a goodlooking man, with excellent gift of the gab, the type that will make a woman drool. I wasnt in the know of how their communication shifted to dating, but it looks like the lady has interest in dating my friend. Their agreement was for her to come to Nigeria while they make arrangement toward getting married and all of that. And after some times, she will arrange for him to come to meet her in Canada.

This looks good on paper. But I have fear for my friend. We all know how Nigerian women are. If this woman has option of men in Canada, there is no way she will show interest in my friend. Ordinarily, Nigerian woman who secure job in Access bank will think of herself worthy of no man except gods because she is now independent and can take care of herself, not to talk of the one in Canada that will think herself undeserving of a man in a 3rd world country. Yeah, I have most of them as friends and this is usually their line of reasoning. Women dont date for love, they date the ones that are perceived better in look, finance and worth than them. Seems the inability to find a commited partner in Canada pushed the said lady to start making such decision. What if this man relocate and she pull the guilt card on him? Letting him realized how she brings him to canada

You have little to lose if you know marital laws in Canada. She has more to lose if she has tangible worth in Canada.

Just go and study divorce marital property division, spousal support and child support system in Canada.

Information is power, give yourself the power.

AquaPetals:
Her husband pays for all bills...feeding, school fees, rent, electricity, etc. He even assists her in sending money to her mom.
I don't know if her anger stems from the fact that he occasionally borrows money from her or he doesn't tell her what he does with money

I know she is an over entitled non contributing woman

She is tired of the marriage as I said before.

Naijapolitics03:
It was our collective agreement. She had a miscarriage one time while she's here, and we agreed she stayed home. I was more concerned about having a baby while she's here but she was having none of that

Now I can see that you are seriously looking for advise.

My advise is this

1. Look for people in Naija that can help you put surveillance on her movements before December.

2. Based on the reports from the surveillance, if you need to confirm their reports, tell her you are coming home say 3rd of January but arrive in Nigeria earlier in December. Make sure you keep it away from everyone that can hint her.

3. When you arrive in December, mount your own surveillance on her based on the reports you get from 1. She will loosely be catching fun throughout Christmas and New Year

4. Get your evidence if any in December and by January 3rd, show up at home for her to see you.

Seunn11:
Good morning everyone.
Please I need more clarity.
Do we need to write the ' Proposed Endeavor ' ?
What is the format? Is it a form to fill??

Proposed endeavor is just your field of expertise where you claim to have exceptional abilities or advanced degree.

1. The person’s proposed endeavor has both substantial merit and national importance;

This means your field of expertise meets the requirements of 2A - Advanced Degree or 2B - Exceptional abilities. And it's of national importance. E.g. an oil and gas engineer is of national importance because of the national needs of energy. A medical surgeon is of national importance because of health of the people. Etc.

2. The person is well positioned to advance the proposed endeavor;

You are still able to continue to practice in your field of expertise. If you are close to retirement, or no longer good in your field, you will not make this.

3. On balance, it would be beneficial to the United States to waive the job offer and thus the permanent labor certification requirement.

It's beneficial for the US to have people of your expertise now and in future. If your expertise is already obsolete, no need to have you.

Western propaganda.

Blessedmercy8:
Na so una go talk. Deep down it is what it is.

The truth is that wayward men are looking for decent women to marry and vice versa.

What is making you make this conclusion is this. Most wayward men and women know how to spot decent partners because of their experiences.

When them wayward people sight a decent partner that is not aware of their past, they are very good at pretending to be decent so that the good partner can marry them. That's why you see some decent people ending up with wayward partners.

Blessedmercy8:
Nlfpmod.

Men abi I lie?

You lie sis.

Slutty women are for the roads, agro etc., decent women are for marriage.

Even wayward men are looking for decent women to marry.

It's difficult to see Nigerian woman that will easily go back to Nigeria from a first world country.

Many of them turn to Canadians, Americans or British etc. the moment their legs touch those countries.

It's like the marriage don tire the woman. Because she is just looking for trouble where trouble no dey.

nokia1000:
I have made a lifetime mistake. Sometimes I feel like committing suicide to get free from regretting. I am seeing myself going down slowly.

If it's getting to the bolded, please separate quickly. Don't kill yourself because of a woman.

If you die because of a woman, within a few month, another man will be mounting her.

Use your head please.

TWoods:
i-140 is for alien workers. you are on the wrong thread... you (or your employer) will need to file an i-485. The case number on your approved i-140 remains the same case number that will be used in filing your i-485. Unless you mentioned the wrong form...

The OP is going through consular processing route, not adjustment of status

hollo:
I have an approved i-140 petition. I would like to ask how long it took for USCIS to send your case to NVC, and when your case number was created. Thanks so much for your reply

To send cases to NVC, it usually takes about 1 week, max 2 weeks.

For the NVC to create the case in their system, it's currently taking about 1 months as per their time frames below

https://travel.state.gov/content/travel/en/us-visas/immigrate/nvc-timeframes.html

kollykolly:
Thank you all for creating this platform. Please I need guidance on filing my DS260 myself. I am on the stage of gathering all my required documents before NVC sends my invoice. @helpout please your advise and intervention.

When your case is received by NVC, NVC will send you a welcome letter containing NVC case number and Invoice number. You will need both to login into CEAC to pay the invoice and fill DS260

Below is current NVC time frames.

https://travel.state.gov/content/travel/en/us-visas/immigrate/nvc-timeframes.html

If you need more specific information about DS260, just ask here.

Toxic feminists misandrists will come and spoil this beautiful thread now.

Amza07:
Very painful, i remember how she would still support me before, but for the good deed she has done before i will not take it to the heart.
She is suffering i know but she sees how am doing my best

At bolded.

It means she has been there for you before when things were down. You want to find out why her behavior is different now.

Talk to her more, discuss more, find out why she is behaving different this time, give her more assurance that things will be okay.

Please be patient. Don't take her behaviors towards you now to heart because if you do, it will further affect your hustle.

Just focus on your hustle and kids for now. God will bless your hustle one more time.

Unfortunately, most women will behave like that when things are down for the man. You can only talk to her to be patient with you. There's nothing more you can do.

How is this about gender or married man or single girl dating argument for or against?

We are talking of a woman that used fake identity to book hotel, used drug to render her victim motionless before stabbing him multiple times to death. After killing him, took his ATM card to withdraw his money.

This woman can do this to a single guy, if the guy has money she can steal.

It's okay. Good luck with this.

Possible1805:
Hi

The peer pressure currently is just too much, people mentality is that traveling is the best option, my partn er started giving me pressure to move out of the country too at the other end am not seeing that as an achievement I mean she expect me to leave a job I created by myself 6years ago in nigeria that is currently fetching me at least 2-3m monthly to japa, if I do will loose all customers because the job is competitive, and for over 6year now I work from home, lose that kind of job and go to Uk as in what kind of job will fetch me 2-3m monthly savings in the Uk.

Now my partner will be looking at me as an enemy of progress, the skills I have is only plumbing work skills i most do that as a side job in nigeria here I only attend to big job, japa is not for everyone you people should stop looking at it as a big achievement… and stop calculating you earning In naija just to say that you better off over there… we all cannot leave nigeria, after you will be saying if you cannot do it for yourself do it because of your children ABEG and what of my mental health…. Please stop calling NIGERIA shithole

What do you think I should do?

This sounds again like a paid or government post to stop Nigerians from moving.

Go and tell your polithiefcians sponsor to bring their children and family back to Nigeria, they should seek medical treatment in Nigeria, their children should be in public schools in Nigeria, they should switch off all their power generators at home, they should drop all their security personnel etc.

advanceDNA:
Na 50/50....
If it works out as u want...good...
If she change and follow another man with settled status then ghost you....no vex... humans can be unpredictable..understand say na survival mode she switch to...

Wateva happens, u go dey alright las las .but no overthink the matter right now...

Agreed. This is 50/50. He should just prepare his mind for both sides of the coin.

By the way, once a naija made marriage is crossing to western countries, irrespective of the sponsor or bread winner, it's always 50/50 risk.

You will understand when you grow more. You are still a small boy now.

By the way, it's not about any tribe or race.

Every parent all over the world brag about their children, especially when the son or daughter is doing well.

Lovely. Congratulations to them

Prospertochu:
We only did traditional marriage

My advise is this.

1. Tell your mother-in-law and her family that they should tell her to bring your daughter back and do things the right way. Let them know you must know your daughter whereabouts and know how her welfare will be taken care of before you can allow her take the girl. Your message will surely get to your wife through them.

2. Give her few days to get back to you. If she gets back to you, discuss your concerns with her. Collect the address in Lagos where she stays with your daughter, visit them to see things for yourself.

3. If she refuses to get back to you, approach welfare system in your state and fight it legally.

She has no rights to take your daughter to a place you don't know or cannot see or visit your daughter as required. Just as she knows where to visit her sons with your mother, you also have equal rights to know where your daughter is, her living condition and all that.

Prospertochu:
She should have asked for my permission she shouldn't have taken her away from me without my consent , plus she is only been to Lagos since August she doesn't have any relatives there i don't know where or who she is staying with and if she is working who will be taking care of my child. She is only 3 years old she is at risk of being molest in Lagos than in the village

This is my fear for the little girl too. What the mother is up to in Lagos must be known before you can be comfortable to leave the girl with her. This is why she was supposed to discuss this with you the father before taking her away just like that.

You both have equal custody rights over the children but it's better the children stay where they will be well catered for, irrespective of any emotions.

Where is she staying in Lagos, what type of work is she doing? What dangers can the girl be exposed to? All these are important considerations to consider

Sometimes some ladies just take irrational decisions over emotions.

I have seen a case where a lady took her daughter like this to Lagos just because of emotions, only for the husband and family to later find out she was doing ashewo work in Lagos and the daughter was being exposed to her work.

mardis:
Leave the girl child with her now. You have the two boys already in your custody allow her take care of the girl. It seems she is capable of doing that. Before you'll go and marry another woman that'll come and turn her to housegirl. And besides she will be more safer under the watchful eyes of her mother. Aren't you afraid of all this child molestors and abusers?

Even at that, she needs to do it proper way.

Was there any prior discussion around the children custody between you both before this?

And what is she into in Lagos, do you think she can take good care of the girl in Lagos with her?

Zelensky just want to cause WW3.

This is why you don't vote a comedian as a president.

He must think nuclear WW3 is a joke.

GboyegaD:
Find an African store around you or ask anyone you know to help you buy from an African store around them. The person will post it to you while you zelle them the cost of the food and postage.
You could also travel to neighboring cities that have African stores to get what you need.

At the worst, order online.

What other online sites do you use? I know of Etsy

https://www.etsy.com/search?q=african%20food%20stuff&ref=auto-1&as_prefix=african%20foo

I know how you must be feeling right now.

For now, just arrange for a comfortable place for mama to stay.

After that, continue to talk to both parties to shield their swords. They can still settle their issues after all adrenaline has settled down. If you children cannot settle them, involve people they both respect alot from their families and even friends.

Remember both of them are your parents, so please remain neutral and fair.

My advise to the woman in this case is for her to approach a competent court or welfare system to fight for visitation rights and custody.

The court will surely hear from both sides before passing any judgment.

All these social media emotional blackmail should be stopped please.