₦airaland Forum

dominique:
Yet another dumb write-up pinning the blame of philandering men on their wives. NOTHING JUSTIFIES INFIDELITY. It takes two to make a marriage work, not just the woman only. God forbid I go out of my way to try and please a cheating horseband. Every time women are given tip after tip on how to how to be a good wife "keep her husband", when will men start getting such tips? Oh! I forgot, keeping the marriage is the sole responsibility of the woman. The man can misbehave as he likes, when he knows he's being prayed for. Rubbish!

Men are getting too indiscipline and irresponsible in this part of the world these days. They know they won't be held responsible for their idiotic habits, because of idiotic write-ups like this.

I feel you. Why does the woman solely have to "keep the marriage"? Isn't it a contract of two people? A real husband will look for a way to make life easier for the woman so that she can take care of herself instead of going out to cheat with a flimsy excuse.

Some ladies are here sayingit is true.

haske7:
I am sorry I have to admit this but my fellow women this is so true.....

Lies that unsuspecting women swallow.
If you like, have the body of Kim Kardashian and the face of the most beautiful girl in the world but a man that will cheat will cheat

frenzyduchess:
the bolded, I won't rush to conclude, cos just like Abraham, even in Sodom and Gomorrah there could be one Lot, but the truth is they are too few, so the number is insignificant that one is tempted to conclude and use ALL instead of SOME. we treated a man for gono, and sadly his wife is pregnant. Since I know him around the area, I sat with him and asked why he didn't use a condom, the stupid answer he gave me was that he has been with the girl for over six months and didn't expect her to give him disease. I was so pissed and had to ask him if it was HIV that how he will go and give his pregnant wife. The man wasn't even remorseful. I see his wife, sometimes she has her hand on her waist am like she is there fighting with the changes in her body, carrying another human being in her tummy, and her husband is busy getting gono outside.The annoying part is the man wasn't even serious with the treatment and there was no indication that was the last time he will cheat either

Really scary. Eventually when this men are old and weak with one ailment or the other, who sticks by them? Definitely not the mistresses. Reminds me of mty friend's dad. He was a very difficult man. He treated his first wife badly and married a second wife.

Both wives left him. Now he is blind and my friend had to travel to go and take care of him. She stayed for a few months but had to give herself brain. He has lived his life and she cannot stop her own life and come and stay in the village with him. He didn't think of his future before living his life recklessly. They had to get someone to take care of him while she left.

Destined2win:
I am crying on behalf of Akpororo.

That's how girls will be cohabiting with guys in school and will end up as someone else's wife.

Guys have mercy na

As in! Very wrong move. That cohabitation is a setup. Many people did it in school. I just thought it was a dumb thing to do with so much uncertainty of the future.

frenzyduchess:
thanks ,so I have seen with my eyes.This particular case is a woman I envy and always wish to be hot like her when I finish having children, the way she falls out and dresses, even younger guys drool, but her husband can hit on anything in skirt. Guys in the area that know always ask what the man is looking for outside. Good character, good bedmatics, good character have proven time and time again not to tame a man dog ,simple

It's just plain greed. The one that really gets to me is how some men are stupid enough not to use a condom and end up infecting their wifes with diseases. Very selfish behaviour.
Meanwhile there are men that have never cheated but i don't think they are on nairaland

I didn't know my dads birthday or age till he passed away. It was never celebrated. Old school people

frenzyduchess:
Hahahahah, I only deal the hand I am served, I can insult, if you choose that way, except I am not in the mood . But I am seriously trying to build myself to the level that even if I am insulted I can keep my calm and debate without retaliating.
Nah, I don't need a dick, I love my pu**y, do have a nice day ahead

I enjoyed your debate. Both of you should debate more.
Off course i agree more with frenzy. Some men try to generalize cheating because they can't keep their third legs in check. A woman can have 4kids and still have the figure of Kim Kardashian or Beyonce and the husband will still cheat. Cheating is no fault of the woman.

onatisi:
Madam you are talking about communication. No be persin wey listen to you ,you go communicate with? Majority of women simply dont listen anymore once they have children. They will tell you their man can do anything he likes as long as they are with their children that their childrenvare their husbands.

Children that will grow up and move away. Spouse should come before children. I hear women say "my children are my life" and i wonder where that leaves the husband.

onatisi:
Because her husband has lost interest in her. Women change a lot after bearing children. They start dressing shabbily within the house and give the children all the attention and care. A man will simply look at her and silent ,then after sometime ignore her.

In that case, both of them are wrong. What happened to communication? They became one for a reason. To make themselves better. If the man sees that she is getting overwhelmed with the kids, he should get a househelp or help in any way that he can to make it easier for her. They are also his kids and she is sacrificing for both of them. He should tell her she is losing herself and that she needs to pay attention to herself. It is not rocket science. Marriage takes work put in by both parties not just the wife getting worked up with her job, the house and children while the guy goes out to cheat.

Instead of the man to let her spend all her time on taking care of the house and children while he goes out to cheat, why can't he help her and get involved so that she can dedicate more time to herself and to him.
Some men will say they dont want househelps but then they expect their wives to be superwomen.

hardbody:
From Ikot ekpene to umuahia or Arochukwu are completely impassable and i am talking about the akwa ibom end.

Get your facts right. The road is bad until the last market and town in Umuahia until you enter ikot Ekpene. You even have to pass through ikot ekpene to get to Arochukwu because of the bad roads from Umuahia. Is there any good road in Umuahia aside the University in Umudike area. Compare Akwaibom with another state but definitely not Abia mbok.

YoungRichRuler:
There are no places in Nigeria without these kind of road.
It may not be in the town though.

I hope these tribal bigots won't take over the thread

Have you been to Akwaibom state?

Children don't need make up. Allow them enjoy their innocent childhood.

Cholls:
my brother's and sisters help me remind daddy dis is not 1967....girls of today are very selfish

Stop following slay queens and flashy babes. This is 2017 and there are still girls like that. Change your search location. You can't find them on instagram,snapchat, to go, facebook...

Kizyte:
Common Cameroon! See as their stadium fine. Everything about Nigeria is low class.

Still cannot compare it to the stadium in uyo.

omenkaLives:
This is the reason I tend not to be surprised at the sheer stupidity being displayed by his gullible Potor Pigs and Idiots. When you urinate on the ground and have a supposed human being with a functional brain take to the floor to lick your urine clean, there is virtually nothing you'd tell them which they wouldn't believe.

I refuse to believe this. What stronghold does this Kanu guy have on the Igbos that have turned them to zombies, unable to use their brains. People will fall for anything when they don't stand for something.

Oluwasaeon:
Can't post mine too

Me neither. I don't like that kind of exposure for such a young baby

TechEnthusiast:
Crap,blatant lies all over your post.
Who told you that females are more matured than males?.This is something based on person and not gender

That's why a 19 year old girl can get married and raise children at that age. But a guy at that age does not even have the emotional maturity to do so even if he is wealthy enough to get married

Prec1ous:
Woooow, and you are cool with it?

Like you know he has so many female friends and you are down with it.

Is it more like, since you have male friends you can't tell him not to keep his female friends.

This is a new type of marital arrangement and I applaud you.

Well it is about openness. I pick his calls and he picks mine and the sex of the caller is never an issue. There is no reason or basis for suspicion. He can keep female friends even if i dont keep male friends. We both know what boundaries are and we try not to cross them.
It is about understanding and communication but what works for us might not work for another couple.

Prec1ous:
Let's not start again.

Guys are always easier to talk to because almost all of us are soft with women. The statement you made is something other guys will say about girls.

Guys Vs guys also have drama and AL those competition you talk about.

You should not be running away from shadows, my opinion has been that, you know your heart but you cannot read his heart.

Everything thing you said up there is just Me Me and ME, can you vouch for the content of his mind?

If your relationship is just good morning and good evening, great but when you start investing too much, then you will get a new flavor. It is cool if you are single but back off if you are engaged.

The point is, you may end up being hunted.

This are the likely scenario.
He may be bidding his time and still sizing you up.
You are unattractive to him.
He is benefiting other things from you.
You are forcing the friendship and he does not want to hurt you.

If your female friends are gossipers and all that, it is a judge of your character and no matter how you minimise that part of you, you will realize that you are not growing.

Good points. But it is probably your personal opinion and experience that informs most of it. In all my years i have had more male friends and i haven't had issues with them. If at all they had other ideas or thoughts, i guess they kept it to themselves.
It has not affected my marriage in anyway cos i married someone that has more female friends than male.

Prec1ous:
I still stand by my view.

A guy and a girl cannot be friends.

It is either they have a past romantic history, living in present romance or building the ground work for future romance.

Let us stop deceiving ourselves, the only relationship they can have and I will be half assured is if they are business partners.

All the girls I have dated, they all called me friends and I LOVE YOU entered into the equation from nowhere. Next, we were frolicking under the sheets, so called friend.

This is a secret, the easiest way for a guy to get a girl is to play the friendship card, along the line just change the game by adding romance, checkmate, she is yours.

If you as a girl cannot get female friends, then there is something wrong about you as a person and your attitude.

Guy also have problems and fights but the only time a guy calls a girl friend is when his game to see her pant is not in the advance stage.

Girls beware, you so-called male friends if given the chance will sleep with you without even thinking twice. Except you are transgender or have leprosy.

It is not ethical, someone will get confused along the way.

This is also a precursor to rape in some cases. The day they will gang rape you, your eyes go clear.

This is a guy's secret, we all want to sleep with that beautiful so-called friends of ours.

So girls, keep deceiving yourself.

If your best friend is a boy and he is not hitting on you then:

-You may not be as attractive as you think.

-You have a bad personality and we know guys are tolerant and pussy no dey bite.

-You are being preyed on the till you are vulnerable, he is watching till he can launch. When I don't know, a man can wait if he is certain to conquer.

- You are transgender or blocked.

Your only trusted male friends are:
Husband
Father
Brothers
Sons

READ THIS: How TRUST is the new SCAM: Stop this blatant lies about TRUST!

I always had more male than female. For me, it was easier to talk to guys. Plus girls were just surrounded by too much drama and pettiness. ..malice, backbiting, envy, competition,etc. But guys were so plain, drama free and easy to get along with.
The line was always drawn cos i am very blunt and straight to the point. No grey areas for me

Try not eating after 6-7pm. Try this for 2weeks and you will see a change

faith2ogesco:
lol. U don't wanna know what she said bout anambra. And d funny thing is DAT my sisters mother in law is from deer and she behaves jux d way she's scared of. So it ain't helping. I know many good anambra peeps o. Jux telling u my mums point for view

Bros are you going to man up or wait on your mother's approval?
My very good friend had an issue like this. He is the first son and his mum was so particular about where he would marry from. He finally picked a wife from a village approved by mumsy. He is married now but the wife and the mum cannot see eye to eye. The wife is like her...quite domineering and doesnt take nonsense just like his mum. So they dont agree.When the mum visits from the villa, she stays with her other son who married a yoruba woman that she didn't approve of. She gets along with that one.
Sometimes mums are picking based on what works for them rather than what works for their son. It is you that will marry the wife not her.

It is mostly the single men or chauvinists that will say the wife should stay at the back. Thank God my husband's friends have sense even the single ones. They get off and ask me to come forward and allow me decline or accept. Most times i decline.

I think we Nigerians limit our children a lot with the excuse of "they are still children". Thats why we look at "oyibo" kids as up there. They achieve a lot at a young age. But we wait for the child to mature before setting them free to explore.

faith2ogesco:
The funny thing is that when she was done, no state in Nigeria was left out...did I say state, no village sef. Dis case share tire me. Even my own village and her maiden village get wahala for her eye. You call this state... She counters...next one she counters.... And so on.... And her responses are hilarious...pls whos facing this predicament ooo. I Don convince her small small sha. But d process is so slow cos if u go too fast you go back to square 1 of the mind changing.

Dont worry when u reach 45 and you are still unmarried, she will be the one to say you should marry anything female. Mothers are not all knowing. They make decisions based on sentiments sometimes. Use wisdom.

On a grave in a graveyard...always toiled with that idea

Assignment

It is parents that fend for their children well...sending them to school ,etc that will do something like this for their parents. Not the ones that have a trailer of children and train only one and burden that one with the upbringing of the others.

What is my own sef!

I think it can still be achieved in a face me i face you. In school people dressed up in a room with other people without revealing any part. Put on your underwears in the bathroom or cover up in the room and dress up without revealing private parts.

The article is really eye opening because there are a lot of things going on around that parents need to be alert when dealing with their children. Some parents shut their children up when they tell them somethings or even blame the kids for it.
I remember a movie i watched recently. A girl was raped by her dad and her mum blamed her for not dressing properly in front of her father.
Op thanks for this.

galaciousbabe:
Are u people sure? I thought maths 101 is compulsory.

Only English 101 is compulsory