₦airaland Forum

Ugwuoke347:
The woman is the spiritual leader of the home.
The home is not identical with the family.
The woman makes the home livable.
She makes the home a dwelling place for every member of the family.
She is the one who makes the home come alive.
She exercises spiritual (passive) authority over that place called home.

The home, the country, the nation, is always qualified as a woman.

The thoughts of the woman alone can quietly destroy or ennoble every form of life in the home including that of plants and animals.

The man is the head of the family.
He is the active ruler of that congregation that results from the coming together of man and woman.

The home is the headquarters of the family. The woman is its passive administrator.

The woman is firmly in charge of making the home a place where life is nourished for the family.

I won't say more.
What I have said has nothing to do with the Bible.
I also won't want to sound harsh on you for describing my submission as "heresy" because it upsets your knowledge of the Bible which you uphold as the only source of truth.
I will rather leave you with a few lines from the same Bible which you like to venerate as the sole source instruction:


"Better to live in the desert than with a contentious and ill-tempered wife."
(Proverbs 21:19)




"A truly good wife is the most precious treasure a man can find! Her husband depends on her, and she never lets him down. She is good to him every day of her life, and with her own hands she gladly makes clothes. She is like a sailing ship that brings food from across the sea. She gets up before daylight to prepare food for her family and for her servants. She knows how to buy land and how to plant a vineyard, and she always works hard. She knows when to buy or sell, and she stays busy until late at night. She spins her own cloth, and she helps the poor and the needy. Her family has warm clothing, and so she doesn't worry when it snows. She does her own sewing, and everything she wears is beautiful. Her husband is a well-known and respected leader in the city. She makes clothes to sell to the shop owners. She is strong and graceful, as well as cheerful about the future. Her words are sensible, and her advice is thoughtful. She takes good care of her family and is never lazy. Her children praise her, and with great pride her husband says, “There are many good women, but you are the best!” Charm can be deceiving, and beauty fades away, but a woman who honors the LORD deserves to be praised. Show her respect— praise her in public for what she has done."
(Proverbs 31:10-31)

Go figure out why these lines were put down in the good book.
Stay blessed always.

Loool at the man is the head of the family but the woman is the spiritual leader of the home.

Anyway since you have said the bolded no problem and no need to drag it further.

Hope you know the parts of the Bible you quoted here do not form part of this discussion I. E spiritual head.

Stay blessed too

jeff1607:
She would have known before marriage, it’s so easy to know one especially if they are dating, how can a lady marry a man who isn’t open with his expenses and his movement c’mon, plus his movement during weekends, they way he follows up on scores not actual matches, unless they didn’t court or he was spending unnecessarily and she did ask questions, a lady who is truly matured and concerned is usually worried about her man’s finances take for instance she notices his house is usually stocked with food stuffs by month end then suddenly either the pantry is empty or he’s buying half of what he usually buy she should know there’s something wrong somewhere.

There are so many pointers to know while dating hence some ladies when they see such traits they just break up with such a guy and he would say “the lady just ghosted him or walked away”

Haba at bolded how many times have we all read on this forum where the male gender always state they should not allow their wives know their financial worth and you are talking about fiancee here, don't check phone don't do this don't do that. Don't declare your income, don't declare your expenses to her don't this don't that.

Some men don't even declare to their wives nau.

If she goes about asking too much about how he spends his money, she will be called a leeach that can't make her own this and that.

How would she have known he was gambling online. It's just a click away.

Try not to blame the lady now you are saying a lady that is matured this and that, she's just unlucky to have fallen into his hands.

Point is it is very possible for her not to know he's very financially reckless except by divine intervention.

It's not safe to marry someone not open financially but then most men don't even think they should open up.

Ugwuoke347:
Don't divorce.
You are the woman, the spiritual leader of the home.
You are the home maker.
God Almighty has given you that charge.
Stamp your feet to the ground and cast the devil out of your home!
Declare it and it shall be so.
You have a battle to win.
Don't give the devil as little as a fraction of an inch.
It is the devil that is deceiving your husband.
Don't let the same devil deceive you into thinking divorce was a solution.
Woman, you have a battle in your hands.
Prayer is the weapon.
Pray yourself and your home out of the deception of the evil one.
Be strong, be courageous.
Step out boldly and all the forces of God shall deliver victory to you.
If you run now, you will be running and stumbling for the rest of your life.
The choice is yours to make.
I am wishing you the very best of strength.

You guys have started with all these misquoting.

Where is it that the woman is the spiritual leader of the home. Did your Bible tell you that?

The man is the spiritual leader of the home, it is because most men have failed that you see women leading the home spiritually.

Give her advice if you want to but don't start preaching heresy.

Acidosis:
I was going to ask the usual question here "why didn't you do your due diligence". But then I have discovered that the easiest thing to hide before marriage is addiction/habit. Anyone blaming you is just being unrealistic You may never know whether your spouse is into drugs, a chronic gambler, a porn addict, or a bisexual. It takes only an app to become a chronic gambler these days. Addictions are mostly things people do in the secret, when they're alone, so how on earth are you going to find out whether your man gambles with money?

The compatibility metric is even useless when it comes to certain issues. For example, no chronic gambler wants to marry another chronic gambler, so chronic gamblers seeking marriage would most likely hide/fake financial discipline or "investments" just to lure a spouse who's probably carried away with money, level of education, good family, or good looks. It's a complex issue.

To the OP, I would only be lying if I tell you that I have a solution. I don't have any. On one hand, I can't advise my sister to remain with a chronic gambler. On the other hand, I think it is too early to have this divorce talks. I mean, your marriage is barely 4 month old. But I hope you find a way around your issues Maybe it's time to activate your conflict resolution plan. A resolution plan may include "a very good family", "an entity he respects so well, e.g. spiritual fathers", etc. If he has none, then your divorce may be faster than you envisaged.

Solid points, it's just a shame shes in this mess honestly.

Richy4:
Anyone that says they should sit down and talk have never met an addict before...it's like pouring water in a basket.....

I was just wondering, talk with a gambler.

Gambling is a very strong addiction that I even think it's a spirit.

She's in for a very long ride, those addicted to gambling will tell her the truth.

It's just a pity she didn't discover before she married him.

All these topics on FP sha.

Nawa.

I think running an hospital should be an administrative job it should not even the job of doctors or other health professionals. Those trained to run an hospital should do it. Let the doctors and other health professionals do their job of taking care of the patient.

Anyway the NMA people won't even agree to Johesu people heading the hospital

The one I saw on watsap didn't say anything about having sex oo, just that they were found dead.

Bloggers ehn.

I might be wrong but the main issue here is the male child brouhaha,

Wifey doesn't want to risk carrying another pregnancy which after 4 children and a miscarriage which he stated here is very understandable. Husband wants a male child and Wifey has told him the surrogacy option, husband wants another wife.

My own question is what if you don't have a male child with the other wife.

That abduction part sha I hope it's not true.

No

It is still accepted if he is still living with his parents before the wedding but once plans for wedding are in place, one of the things in motion should be an apartment, even if it is room and parlor.

My cousin tired it, my mother shouted and shouted she ended up regretting it, she spent 10years.

Something is not right about this story.

Doesn't sound right.

I don't buy it.

LatestgistTv:
Hi, I'll go straight to the point.

Water is very important and we are in dry season, water has dried up in most wells in the state I am in but luckily for us, our own well hasn't dried up, it's still serving us.

Our well was dug almost close to our fence, we share this fence with another compound. We woke up yesterday and found out that our neighbors we share the same fence with has started digging their own well close to our own well. The annoying thing is that these people have a septic tank near the new place they are digging their well and this might affect the two wells.

Please nairalanders, is this in anyway going to affect our own compound's well?

Lots of people try not to dig wells close to fences, especially when they are not certain about the future location of the soakaway of the next compound because you can't control another person's actions.


You can't tell your neighbor not to dig a well in his compound, that doesn't sound right. He still has a right to source for water in his compound.

You might try to talk to him but there's still a limit to what you can do.


I would be more worried about the soakaway closeby that the well, people say if it's close it can contaminate the nearby well.

Phew that part where there were shouting ' we are students' and border police pointing gun at them was scary sha.

They had their phones up on record sha.

Thank God for social media

Good one by RCCG.

MrDebonair:
Shouldn't the Nigerian ambassador to Poland in conjunction with FG make arrangements with his counterparts for Nigerians to leave Ukraine via Poland?

The Fed Govt. should have summoned the Polish ambassador to Nigeria to explain why Poland is refusing assistance to Nigerians escaping war in Ukraine. Otherwise ambassador should be expelled out of Nigeria. We are talking about lives here.

Shame

The arrangements are there some have crossed over.

Either way Ukraine has to allow them cross first before Poland or the Nigerian officials can help them.

Possibly this is happening in one border, they said Nigerian embasdy officials will be at 4
Ukraine-polish borders.

What's the whole hullabo even about sef?

So because an airpeace flight was delayed from Gambia, the local airpeace flight should also be delayed to accommodate a respected person? Nope that's not proper, it doesn't work that way.


If they have issues with the delayed flight they can decide to take it up with airpeace as to why their flight was delayed that's a whole different issue entirely but that's not their problem.

Nawa oo.

Sorry sir, try and follow the TTC thread links given up there,there's a whole lot of information on that thread,

I believe there should be procedures/ drugs for hormonal imbalance, what is the doctor saying? Has the doctor said IVF is the only way out?

It is well.

It will happen.

immortalcrown:
Forceful penetration can be proven by a medical test. But is penis the only object that can forcefully penetrate the place? Did the post tell you the result of the test? The argument is not even whether a medical test can prove forceful penetration. Try to follow the argument from the beginning. Stop being stupid. The argument is whether the post says the test result proved the rape happened. The post just said she did a test. The post does not explain the result of the test.

If you are not stupid, point out any of my comments that make me a rape apologist.
If you are not stupid, point out where I justify rape.
If you are not stupid, point out where I said the rape did not happen.
I only explained that the court is being careful. I did not say the rape happened. I did not say the rape did not happen. I only said the court did the right thing based on the evidence provided.

The bolded is all I wanted to hear.


And yes there are too many rape apologists on NL

I hope those children that are always shouting for war now sees how it is, war is not something to be experienced.

This is terrible!!

Richy4:
Young man... There's no need really to rope your mother into this whole drama of your stubbornness....
You are living in your father's house, he got rules and his rule says "cut that hair before u enter into my house"... If u don't really like it, u pack and be free.. but if u want to stay, u go ahead and cut the hair and abide by his rules...

It's just a simple rule... U are 22... A 22yr old is old enough to be alone, stay in prison, vote and be voted for, earn a living etc... If you dislike the idea of cutting your hair and you have had it up to your neck, this is the right opportunity to gain your freedom..

As for your mother, she has a reason best known to her on why she decides to stay with an unfaithful spouse.. that is none of your business but between the two of them......

I will not criticise your father, I will not criticise your mother... because they knew how they were living and it was working for them...irrespective of what popular opinion says...

Please stick to the rules or u move out... Do not endanger your mother's life because of your stubbornness.. she slept outside because of the fact that she was supporting u... You already know that your father is heartless and have no more feelings for your mother, so consider her first before u try any other stubborn act...

But it's the father that roped the mother in or is it not the same story we read.

He chased both of them out because of the sons haircut.
He is supposed to address the issue with the son and leave the mother out of it, he chased his wife and son because of a haircut he could tell the boy to trim off with scissors immediately. That doesn't sound right to me.

@immortalcrown the question was(and is still is)

Are you saying forceful/violent penetration cannot be determined medically? Because that is what I highlighted.


It's a yes or no answer. No long story please. You can decide not to respond.


And yes there are too many rape apologists on NL.

immortalcrown:
You are just trying to force your sentiment on me. One, the woman has her side of the story and the man has his own side of the story. Two, I did not say the rape happened and I did not say the rape did not happen. What exactly is your point against my comment? What she documented on her phone can be caused by rape or by anything else. Rape is not the only thing that can cause bruises on skin. Rape is not the only thing that can scatter things in a house. What she recorded on her phone does not show the man beating her or sexing her. So, the court was being careful. You are just using your sentiment to sound as if I am against the woman. Neither the woman nor the man has my support because I did not witness the incident. Only God, the woman and the man know the truth. All I know is that the court has not done anything that is logically wrong. A medical test can show the man had sex with her. But no medical test can show if the sex was forceful or peaceful. A medical test can show the DNA of a man that sexed a woman. But no medical test can show the sex style used by the man.



.

You are saying forceful/violent penetration cannot be determined medically?

So what do you think was in the medical report?
Why do you think she went to the hospital.

You people should fear God Na.

Anyway too much rape apologists on NL so not surprised, the country it happened doesn't even help matters.

Olumighty123:
I really hope it's not your mom who has been feeding you with lies about your dad, he is not responsible and your mother had stuck around for over 22 years, so many mothers tend to win their children's heart by telling fake lies about their husband young man, you better use your head so you No go because of your father enter hell

Loool because a 22 year old is a toddler that can't see what's going on around him abi,

Fake lies indeed.

You people should call out bullshit when you see it.

Nairaland boys- If a child calls a father irresponsible then it's the mother feeding him with lies, he can't see or feels abi, or is it the mother feeding him with lies about his womanizing. They must sha blame the mother for the fathers indiscretions.

So because she stuck of for 22 years makes what he's saying a lie abi.


They can't even call the father out for his indiscretions.

He chased both him and the mother out because of the haircut, why not just tell the boy to cut it with scissors if there's no barber around.
What if the mother had even told him to cut the hair but he didn't listen sef and the best way to be a father is to chase both mama and pikin out instead of doing the needful.

maasoap:
You're talking about me, I haven't even started yet.

Start soon, start no matter how small you start.

newmoney133:
God will provide for you.You will understand it better.imagine if they were four.we dont know tomorrow.your uncle did not plan to die but death came and responsibility became your own.We cannot solve nigerian's problem without talking about overpopulation. I priced one coconut today and Mallam said one is 700naira.I just walk away I did not even bargain for any price.

The bolded made me laugh so hard, 700 naira for coconut, Chai.

It's better to kuku walk away, it is well oo

osazsky:
ignore them...i know of a collegue that pays 630k as rent in benin..i also know of a collegue who manages a 2 room face me i face u..the guy gave us the shock of our lives when he informed my madam he was moving to his personal house..me thats on 250k house rent just they weep

Loool dunoo why I found this funny.

I understand sha.

I have seen people move from one face me face you to their own homes, even when they could afford renting bigger apartments.

Some would also prefer being a bit comfy and still build though slowly.

Lastlast everybody will be fine I guess.

He's correct

Why would you take a man that has not told you he wants to marry you to your parents?

If he has not declared his intentions of marriage then there's no point introducing him.

You want to introduce boyfriend or someone who asked you out for lunch repeatedly?

NohurryInLife:
#3,650
E no dey pass 4 days

Nairalanders can be very mean

You even had to add the duration.

Truely that pangolo no dey pass four days

People will be saying IVF as if IVF doesn't fail.

Are there not people who have done IVF several times and no result.

eragoggle:
The video of the entire thing is online. Very true event, I live 20 mins away from where this happened.

Do you have a link?