₦airaland Forum

49cents:
you seem to happy with your sagacious sounding quote about thighs and whose been there;

Okay i leave you to accept your philosophy that [b]your life and its daily issues is so much bigger than who has or hasn't been between your thighs[/b]

i spoke based on what you posted so don't blame me if i am not a clairvoyant;

if you know your body be sacred how come you are having pre-marital sex with your fiance? anyway i don't know if you are Christian!

BTW Virgins. Keep not only your virginity, but your pride in being one; don't be sorry to anyone about it; dont try to please anyone . if they dont appreciate it for its really value by trying to live clean then move on they are not your type, you hear .

What is your problem? Why are you picking on me? I am not having premarital sex - stop trying to find out information about me. My relationship with God is none of your business. I was a virgin and was proud to be one. So I totally agree with you. So stop it please and back off me.

This is different.

Va-j-j is virginal tight when a woman hasn't been with a man in a long time and then Kegel Exercises as well as surgery also tighten that area to the same level as well.

But if this is your wife and you have intimacy regularly - I don't know,

Is she dry?  That could definitely affect her ability to be elastic. - Try what TKB417 said - KY Jelly. I personally cannot vouch for it, but it markets itself as a lubricant.

Also, I would do as this writer suggests:

JOKYTECH:
@ OP
Both of u beta see a gyneacologist ASAP

adconline:
Moneygram and Western Union!!!

hahahahaha

We haven't tried Skype yet - but we have heard that it too is excellent - we are planning to try that as well

omega25red:
due to your insecurities you wont pick up her calls because you allegedly heard your girl having s3x with someone and you had the nerve to hang up instead of calling her out on what you thought you heard.

im bored

I agree with this writer.

@ OP

Be the type of man that allows her to either:

Deny it, Admit it, and/or to even be allowed to defend her position.

I LOVE MY MAN because he would have "called me out immediately" - he wouldn't have bitten his tongue nor hung up and not have answered. He would have allowed me the opportunity to express myself before he "Just Turns His Back."

That is the sweet, sweet essence of a "real man."

coded777:
I like this. almost all the post adds CONSTANT communication, must i be everyday communication ?
when you say constant, how constant, think every one can afford to make daily calls.

My baby found out that on yahoo messenger - which is a free download - not only can he see me via webcam but we can also talk if you have a microphone on your computer - we can see each other and talk at the same time- FOR FREEEEEEEEEEE!!

omega25red:
I honestly beleive that you father is mostly concerned about your education and your ability to be independent in the future. sounds like your father really care about you because honestly your husband to be can wait for you to finish school before you get married. By the way where is this fiancee of yours through all these things? This is when a real man would stand up with his faamily and go talk to your father to hear his concerns and adjust future plans as possible to satisfy him so he can give his blessing.

I completely agree with every word of the writer listed above.

Leave her and DON'T LOOK BACK

If you look back you will turn into salt

--------------------------------------------------------

What bothers me is that she was PREGNANT

Answer me this?  What woman do you know that is pregnant would allow new and different D-I-k-K, to infiltrate her va-j-j unless she is a love-peddler?

How in the h.ell do you allow foreign d--i--k--k to get anywhere near another man's child in your belly?

--------------------------------------------------------

I repeat LEAVE her and NEVER LOOK BACK

If she did it once, she will do it twice

She didn't feel bad about her activities

You will resent her, you won't be able to forget, you will be looking over your shoulder throughout this and other relationships

My apologies to you in advance for saying this as it is not my intent to hurt you.

SHE IS A LIAR AND A LovePeddler.

----------------------------------------------------

Ask God to give you the strength to leave and never look back and ask him to give to you a woman that is deserving of you his child

Gradual - not first sight

Just as quick as first sight starts - IT ENDS EVEN QUICKER

Gradual - allows you to know if the attraction is deeper than skin deep and if the attraction is worthy of maintaining long enough to form a real relationship

Taking your time encourages growth and investigation of each other

He's my chocolate and I don't share

Get your own

No bachelor's party for my man - we had this conversation

If he wants a stripper - I will be his stripper

I better not catch a stripper near him

She won't strip again

Also an ex is out of the question

Am I jealous?  I guess I am

Oh well - so now you see one of my shortcomings - of which I make no apologies

Happy Sunday everybody

COMMUNICATION (CONSTANT)

Honesty - not lying and if lying - being forthright in clearing it up right away
Trust - trusting each other to be honest and loyal
Loyalty - being loyal to each other in voice and deed
Money - he sends it to me and I send it to him
Sex - phone, internet, email, chat

A long distance relationship should be identical to a relationship in person as much as possible

If he and I pay bills in each others presence - then it is also expected long distance
If he and I buy gifts for each other when we are together - the same is to be expected long distance
If he can whisper sex in my ear in person - we can do it online and/on phone

etc,

long distance definitely can work if both parties are committed to making it work

love is a beautiful thing

@ Cork:

I like your thread - you are good all of a sudden, what happened? I am very impressed with you.

OK - just today, my man and I were talking and - I have alot of emotional baggage from previous relationship(s) - I will be the very first person to admit this, I have been through some past BS with a previous mate and it has affected me.

My man knows this, we are talking about it OPENLY and I know for A FACT that I have more emotional baggage than he does. SO this does bother me and I am actively working through this so that when we marry at the beginning of the New Year it won't be too harsh on our relationship.

On his end - he is extremely controlling - As a couple we will have these two areas to work on, I just wanted to contribute to your thread as I found it very, coincidental that you would post this the very day that he and I had deep conversation regarding "emotional baggage."

Cork - thank you for demonstrating your maturity that I somehow never saw in you before - it is very refreshing and pleasant.

[quote author=Tink_sh link=topic=496510.msg7139540#msg7139540 date=1289713245]Hehehe,  jealous much?? If you wanted my attention so badly there are other ways to get it. Your mother must be so proud.[/quote]@ Tink:

How randomly, weird was that? Just ignore, Continue to be who you are.

denony:
*yawns*  

two sided and difficult situaion here
tell the wife, u scatter the family
keep silent, the probelm continues

shakes head  

I agree

jay bee:
Talk to your dad about it

Do everything Jay Bee Just Said - that is how I would handle it -Tell your Dad - immediately - Let Your Dad Handle It - Don't tell your friends - don't say a word to them - up to this point you have handled it correctly

I just had this conversation with my man recently - something similar anyway

I don't like anyone walking in and out of the bathroom while I am bathing, showering, releasing fluid, etc.

This is MY TIME for me.

He is used to being able to do this and sees it as very normal and wants ready access to me at all times in all situations and even more so since we are getting ready to marry but I am not comfortable with this,

So Poster - I feel your pain.

On a side note - her odor is influenced by what she is putting in her mouth so encourage her to drink LOTS OF WATER and flush her system frequently every single day and less of drinks and foods that are toxic. Plenty of fruits and vegetables will change the odors to be a bit more acceptable to herself and others.

I will kill a woman if she puts her hand on my man - and I am not ashamed to say it.

I love him - I belong to him - he belongs to me.

God forgive me for I will sin.

You already know what to do.

A blind, deaf and dumb person would know what to do with this man.

He accepts money/gifts
Gives Nothing in Return
He expects you to get money from other men and give to him

You are in School Learning

But you are on NL asking us to tell you the OBVIOUS?

Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles would be blinded by the answer to this question as it is soooo obvious.

livedit:
By waiting on God and seeking the Kingdom of God first. Praying diligently and fasting. You ask God, and he will tell you. God only puts two equally yoked people together. In addition, by taking your time to really to get to know each other by spending time together. Knowing first what you want in and expect to get out of a relationship and not settling and by making sure you are matured spiritually, emotionally, physically and financially ready for marriage.

You are COMPLETELY CORRECT

very loyal, extremely creative when solving problems, don't accept the answer "NO", very attractive, chameleon-like

I love you J - I love you DEEPLY.

Yes - IT DEFINITELY DOES EXIST OVER THE INTERNET

People meet everywhere

You just need to be a bit more cautious and keep God in your life daily

madlady:
I've never been but I would love to.

I love the spinach stews.

@chaircover's bridal and fashion boutique is located in Lagos, you might check that out.

I love spinach so I will eat anything with spinach in it - thank you very much for that information

Chaircover has a bridal and fashion boutique? Wow this is GREAT information - I will definitely go there - thank you


[quote author=Tink_sh link=topic=548425.msg7112824#msg7112824 date=1289369768]I just wanted to say, im so excited for you shy-one. Would love to go myself one day but not brave enough, hehe! I hope you have an awesome time and report back all your adventures. Stay safe!!

Congrats on your first thread! [/quote]Tink:  Thank you soo much - I am going to Lagos in either January or February - I am scared a bit, but also excited.  I get nervous around a lot of people especially those that I don't know and Lagos looks soo BIG and millions of people so I am trying not to hyperventilate too much about it.

mamaken:
I advise you to spend a whole day in the ShopRite in lekki. all under one roof. good food, clothes, shoes and much more . . .

u'll love nigeria. i wish u a pleasant stay 

Lekki?  I was told about Lekki - isn't there a beach in that area also?  I will try this ShopRite - thank you.

Creamish:
U need patience . . n try not to b upset at d slightest thing . . . Lagos is fun . .esp at night . . I loved goin to d beach then . . im sure ul enjoy your stay there.

BTW . . some of d local dishes r actually very cool . .u shuld listen to dat little tempting voice in u n try it  

Creamish:  Thank you soo much for your insight - I do tend to get upset easily - I am very very grateful to you for saying this to me - I will really focus on being patient - there is a strike going on in Lagos today and the banks aren't open, you can't buy gas for generators today - this type of thing is unheard of in the U.S. - banks closed because of strikes - so I will try very very hard to be patient and stay quiet.

I am looking forward to the local dishes - just hope my system can handle it.

adagz 01:
I guess you are coming wif your bobo which is a nigerian,so just relax let him do most of d moving around with you.

Expect very hot whether condition above 30 degrees,the ppl are very hospitable,nice night clubs,bar,shoping mall,good culture,silly hold up,419 plety sha o,expect plenty toasting,dont disobey lagos boys they can beat anybody,no emergency call to the police o etc.

you can gimme a call when you don arrive

Thank you Adagz 01 - my man lives in Lagos and he works all the time and so do I - I am actually bringing my laptop so I can work as well starting week 2 of my stay.  We don't do night clubs or bars as we don't drink.

Can I ask you this?  What is 419?  What do you mean here?  I hear this 419 number all the time and I still haven't figured out what this means.

I don't disrespect men so the "lagos boys" have no worries - I won't be alone so my man will be with me at ALL TIMES - he said what you said about it being hot - you know there will be snow below zero weather in Indiana when I leave here going to Lagos - so I will have to buy clothes in Lagos so I can dress for the weather in Lagos -thank you

[quote author=Okija_juju link=topic=548425.msg7112554#msg7112554 date=1289363739]Welcome to lagos, The city of hustlers
Everybody's in a hurry, Traders & Customers
Pockets get picked, on a regular
If your not street, please be careful with your cellular
Be careful when you are driving cos an Okada just might be near you
Knock one of them down, and the rest gonna tear you to pieces.
Danfo drivers always wanna fumble, rush hour traffic is like the royal rumble.

- Mode Nine!! This is Lagos

But on a more serious note;

Lagos na die o!! Just hook up with the right people (esp. Family), And hopefully they can show you around. No find anybody trouble o!! And no behave like JJC. Shine your eye, No disrespect Officer a.k.a Olopa a.k.a Police a.k.a Mopol and you'll be fine. Have fun.

Tourist destination to avoid;

Ajegunle City.  

Things to look out for;

The people, the culture, the hussle, the night life and ofcourse Olopa!![/quote]Thank you for this information.  Please help me - what is Okada?  what is Danfo Driver?  Thank you


[quote author=Ileke-IdI link=topic=548425.msg7112530#msg7112530 date=1289362872]A close friend of mines [ Used to be a Nler] just left US to stay in Lagos.

I'll call him up and let him give you the info abt Lagos.

He knows everywhere and things to do in that city. Hope you enjoy. I'll be back after asking him [/quote]Thank you so much Ileke - This is wonderful information.  I would love to hear from your friend - but I will not be allowed to call him - my man would be highly offended and absolutely would not understand my communique with another man via phone.  But I would love if he would be able to respond on NL - His comparisons to the U.S. versus Lagos would be PHENOMENAL for me and I would be eternally grateful to you for this,  That was a good idea.

jennykadry:
^^Cool for you

Thank you Jenny very much - I am scared and excited at the same time.

Thank you all so much for responding because I am truly nervous about this trip

The way you have described Lagos is making me feel a lot better and more comfortable

So thank you very much for your responses

End of discussion

both present and future

This is my first thread so I'm nervous. But I need some advice so I need your help NL.

I am coming to Nigeria for the first time - to Lagos. Please advise me on what to expect from your point of view. What I should try to experience while I am in Lagos. I will be there for one month.

Examples:

I have never had Nigerian Food - my system is very sensitive so I don't want to eat anything too heavy. Maybe some dishes you would suggest please?

Also, places to visit that are cultural in Lagos and surrounding area.

I love clothes and shoes - would you suggest certain shops over others?

Please advise - I welcome men and women.

Runnnnnn

Do not go back to him

Dump you once - shame on him

Dump you twice - shame on you

I am what you call a "work-a-holic"

I also LOVE BEAUTIFUL THINGS

It is critical that I be allowed to be the "help-mate" I was created to be

I work and deposit ALL OF MY MONIES into my man and our current and future that we are building together

So the only way I will stay home is that he allow me to "work from home."

His income - regardless to how big it is - still isn't enough for "us".

I love contributing - I love buying him gifts and spending money on myself - I love staying busy

So If I am at home - I have to be allowed to work from home - work that brings in $$$$

Loving someone DEFINITELY IS NOT A CRIME

It is to be expected that you will love someone, be totally loyal and dedicated to your mate.

The problem is if YOU CHOOSE and YOU DON'T LET GOD choose your mate - YOU WILL LIVE A HELL ON EARTH

It isn't about Love - It is about Loving and committing to the RIGHT PERSON

Good luck to you and God Bless.

49cents:
[/b]
You just confirmed my hypothesis: many sexually active people, married or unmarried  do not understand a thing about sex, for such people it is just a release of tension , they just discovered and end up becoming dominated by its power. 

sex is supposed to bond two beings such that they will be able to do that which a single person just cant. The iintimacy that sex brings about is unworthy of the unmarried, that is why it is difficult to overcome an ex without irrationally hating them.

Virgins have a greater chance to bond better with their spouses (all things being present) than spouses with long litanies of ex-es.
BTW Virginty is just a state of preservation for the worthy one of intimacy; it is not really about an umbroken hymen or possessing other physical qualities of virgin.

If you are a virgin dont be naive cos thats why you are berated and even scorned live your life everyday happily and confidently you are not missing a thing you are just saving it all for the life-long future

@ 49 CENTS:  VIRGIN THIS! OK?

When you have a hypothesis - STATE IT FIRST before opening your mouth about what I did or did not confirm - ok Big Boy?

Don't assume anything about me as YOU KNOW ME NOT!!!

I don't release tension by having sex - as my body IS SACRED TO ME.  As far as my understanding anything about sex you are delirious as you KNOW NOT WHAT I DO AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND.

I have been married - my husband died - GOT IT?

I am also re-engaged and am scheduled to remarry in Lagos in 2 months - ok genius?

I'm BLESSED ON SOOO MANY DIFFERENT LEVELS that to break it down to you is what is "unworthy of me - wasting my valuable time explaining sex, virginity, bonding, loyalty and intimacy it to you - as your response is clearly indicative of the fact that you wouldn't understand and I refuse to take the time to school you further."