₦airaland Forum

nasty45: dan boroba.shege.warnka.pesn teach mallam sth e d curse am.lil 1da d wan gv dem almajiri skul

LOL. What makes you think Funkymallam is an Aboki?

http: What a way to go about "serving the people"

Serve which people? When you work in a company, do you claim to serve the company? These public office holders pay themselves many times over what they'd have earned if they worked in the civil or private sector.

So there is nothing like service in what they do. Nigeria's politics is extremely dirty and selfish.

Odunnu: I owe you a drink . Lets hook up at 8hrs tonight lemme blow your mind

Hmm.. See neighbours. I never knew you were resident in Enugu.

@ OP, a point to note however, is that most times the power issue may be restricted to a single transformer which then affects that area (sometimes for protracted periods). But people tend to blow it out of proportion and make it seem as if the entire PHCN or even the govt has forgotten about them.

Where I stay in Enugu, power has been strangely very steady. When it goes off, it hardly lasts up to 30mins before being restored.

@ OP, "Fast: knowing that you haven't made your first million by 24 and that you are too late". Is that the only "fast" thing you heard about that advert? Please find other things to worry about.

Ok what do you then have to say about the quote below?

jephiano: My favourite line in the advert is:"Fast is taking impatience and turning it into a virtue." just love it man

It's very possible to be a millionaire by 24. But we don't always grow up as adolescents and teenagers, with the thought of making the first million by so and so age. Teenagers are primarily concerned with knowing the hottest artiste, fad phone, which clique to roll with and guy or babe to go out with. So that is why most people miss the target and by the time they begin to consider it, they are already over-aged.

I was a bit lucky to have age on my side. Finished Uni at 20 and by 25 I had crested the N1m mark. It should have been a year earlier sef but for the fact that I had other plans.

I wasn't born a silver-spooner. Far from it.

If you want to make your first million, no time is too late. But make sure it is acquired genuinely, that you do not misplace your priorities simply because you want to hit 1M and after making it, what happens next. Shift goals.

I call her "Mummy" naturally (never "mum" ) . There are times when I may call her by her trad title "Lolo". My younger sisters frequently call her by her name " Daa Virgy" (in English, "Aunty Virgy" ).

Why Hausa and Igbo?

BTW, is it pronounced 'Ausa' or 'Hausa'?

H is a consonant not vowel and shld be preceded by "a" not "an".

Tobexin: ,.Mr eze is also a trader and dealer, terkura said there is goin to be war because ojukwu his egocentric and concerned with the succession because of the discovery of oil in the easten region which gowon will not allow, terkura took permiss ion to leave provincial hotel at markudi to go home and see his dad(mattew asten who is a catechist and farmer) and his mother margaret who gave birth to his first son that died and she gave birth to another 6 surviving children,....margarat her mother wants him to marry torkwase but he refuse the offer because of his dream to go to the university and own an hotel at the end of the day, provincial hotel is a govt enterprises and the ibo believe that they ase lords and perceives that other tribes are lesser nigerians, maria was 19 and okoh wa7 24 when they got married..okoh as a father of a baby wants to name his son monday while his father named him ifenne..

I can't count the number of errors contained in just that paragraph.
Have you yourself passed JAMB?

ceejayluv: Ada! Oh Ada!.. She carry my heart, set am for ground, come use am play penalty.... Come score! *sobbin*

Ha! The funny stuff I see on NL everyday. Make laff no give me fracture O. LOL

Ceejay, who dey goal-post when she use your heart form ronaldo na?

Ejiné: More on Anambra. . .

This is AWKA!
https://www.elombah.com/awka2.jpg
Follow this link to find out more! http://www.elombah.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=3882:the-anambra-tragedy&catid=36:pointblank


In the meantime, ‘the very processes of government are reduced to hollow rituals for rent seeking and glorified indolence. Nothing gets done except in the service of a very corrupt officialdom. Salaries of workers have remained unpaid. Pensioners have forgotten when last they got paid. The most elementary responsibilities of government are everywhere in abeyance. Teachers do not get paid. Hospitals have neither drugs nor personnel. Existing manpower in state institutions is so demoralized that the threat of mass suicide looms. Local governments see only a fraction of their statutory allocation’[/i]."

I hope you guys are having a look at the TRUE realities that are on ground. Don't let this pompous idiiotic sycophant foool you. Instead of rolling up his sleeves and actually getting to work on the shocking things happening in that dead zone, he's here on the internet trying to denigrate Owerri - a city that is far more progressive than he and his gang of underfed lackeys can ever think of competing with.

Eh! I think he has fled the scene. Dede biko mee re ya ebere, for he knoweth not what he says.

Okija_juju: Unbundled NEPA/PHCN

. Removed checkpoints from Nigerian roads.

How is the unbundling of PHCN considered an achievement? By the way it is being handled by the Min of Power and BPE.

The removal of checkpoints was recommended and implemented by the IG Police.

I used to be a staunch supporter of GEJ but in hindsight, I see it was mainly due to sentimental reasons.

I can't think of much that he has done in the last one year. I would have listed the increase in minimum wage but then that one is a Greek gift to score political points. Some Fed Civil servants are being owed salaries since January.

He also slammed us with fuel price increase in the name of withdrawing subsidies. What then was done to reduce the shock of the price increase? SURE-P? Sing that to the dogs.

He sat there and left the CBN gov create massive unemployment in the nation and now he's making plans to also retrench civil servants. Feeding us daily with propaganda about good this, good that.

You guys should form your opinion about his performance. I'm tired.

akpanbaba: My sister the word of God says submit to your husband period.Pls do, so that the love will continue.

Pally what does that same part of the bible say concerning the husband's relationship with the wife?

Funny. The part of the story about Nigeria's alleged plan to deport double the number that SA started with (2 times 125) before considering any form of negotiations.

I wonder what'll happen to Nigerians resident in that place.

@ Coupe-boy, your marriage is in deep trouble from the look of things but I'll suggest you focus more on how to manage the situation so that it doesn't break beyond repair.

I don't want to do the castigating stuff because previous posters have done that bit. But guy you goof big time. And I hope this lesson will be a constant reminder for you to stay off any other woman besides your wife.

Be the first to let your wife know what you have done. It'd be worse (and possibly irreparable if she gets to hear about it from an outsider or even your FB chick). Start by telling her that you've done a veeeery bad thing but that it was unintentional and you didn't mean to hurt her. Apologize. Apologize. Apologize.

I am 100% against abortion, so the baby has to stay. It's either FB chic keeps the baby and you provide support for her (TEMPORARILY O!) or she gives you custody of the baby (that's for you and her to decide) who will grow up with your granny or mother. Can't risk having wifey strangle the baby one night.

Guy you did really bad. Go and work on salvaging your marriage and pacifying your wife.

Me take a bullet for my babe? Na today I begin do that one? Throw me the bullet na. See if I no go catch am. Mscheeeew.

You guys are all giving these negative responses because the original song Otis, was also CRAP. The worst Kanye song I've ever listened to.

Terrible video, poor delivery. Makes me wonder how it got nominated for a Grammy (it's like it won even. Abi?)

This MI song would have done better without the video. I'm even surprised the girl Pryse did better than MI here.

Critics, don't bother using this song to rate MI. Well you could do without the video. MI performs far better than this.

truelove.com:
@gidimonsta  point of correction, M.I  na ibo man, he grew up in jos wit his brother jessy jag. but dem no be hausa, check their surname ''Abaga''. its not hausa, but ibo

You see? You don't even understand the lyrics in a rap. Jesse Jagz gave their full background in that song he did with MI, Ice Prince and Blaze in the "Talk about it" album (I've forgotten the song title). He said he's Jukun by tribe from Taraba. Gave his name as Jesse Abaga.

For the SE, the only places where I know reprisal attacks may happen are at Aba (undoubtedly), Onitsha, Umuahia and maybe Owerri. That is if any Boko Haram attack happens to occur there. The rest of the entire SE are just bark and no bite.

When Anambra state buried those 20-something victims of the Madalla bomb blast, did anything happen eventually? Anything? If that had been at Aba, honestly no Hausa man would remain in that town even up till now.

As for the SS, I know they are too hot-blooded to be that forgiving and let such attacks go un-avenged on any poor aboki stupid enough to remain in town.

~Bluetooth:
When is innoson going to start exporting his mobile casket to the US and other european countries ? If his cars are great as he claimed,i wonder why Nigerians are buying hondas of 1980's edition.see as the name strong to pronounce for mouth sef.

There are times when I feel strongly tempted to respond to your clownish posts but then on second thoughts, what is the point in replying a faceless, jobless, juvenile imbe.cile who's means of getting off and assuaging his feelings of inferiority, is to live his life on a website, always venting off the rubbish filled in his head.

I pity your children because looking at your posts, yours is the kind of person who lays about, dumps every responsibility on the wife (that is after your parents have eventually forced to you to go and marry. Heck! You may even be gay for all I know) blames his inadequacies on govt and every other thing that crosses his slow-motion, bigoted brain. Have you ever thought of what you stand to gain from maintaining multiple profiles and using them to yap about Igbo this and Igbo that on someone else's website? Don't you have other useful things to do with your life besides crying about Igbos on Nairaland? Did you lose your girlfriend to an Igbo guy? Or maybe a relative of yours got killed in the Biafran war? Then he shouldn't have partaken now, if he knew he couldn't survive a war.

Bro, please try to free your mind and do away with all these childish thoughts of inferiority O. Stop hating on Igbos. You are only upping our rep.

You want to buy an IVM Crosstour look-alike abi? When you can't afford an Audi 80. Please don't bother waiting for the car. I don't want you going home to your people to show them pics of an Omo-Igbo ride and claiming its what you now drive.

As for that other clown with the un-pronounceable name. I have reasons to suspect that you are still the same guy. If not, be a good boy that I want you to be and pass on my message to him e hear? I don't have the time for him now.

GAR3TH:
The cars will be "made in Nigeria" but in reality they will be "assembled in Nigeria". Like I've said numerous times Innoson is not really a "Nigerian company", Its just like volkswagon of nigeria and peugeot of nigeria. Innoson was created by joint venture between a Nigerian Industrialist, Wuling motors of China, King Long United Automotive, Dongfeng Special Vehicle (Shiyan) Bus Co and other international stake holders and companies. The only difference is that unlike VWN, ammeco or Peugeot of nigeria, Innoson gets to put their logo on the buses. The engineers that the article mention are most likely foreigners, but i know they have some nigerians [this one guy from borno]. however Innoson has no design team, because they dont create the vehicles, since they import. I believe what the article was hinting at is that 50% of the products were "made" in nigeria, as in assembled and the other 50% were preassembled imports from other countries, enigine blocks, transmissions etc.

http://innosonivm.com/en/ProductList.Asp?Page=1
http://dongfengbus.en.alibaba.com/productlist.html
http://www.king-long.com.cn/en/p_detail.asp?pr_class=5&id=106
http://innosonivm.com/en/ProductView.Asp?ID=54

@Topic this is a good development that the FG will patronize the company. This means more jobs for the locals and a boost to the economy.

The only thing I can say about the rubbish lie and utter falsehood you posted is that you know next to nothing about Innoson manufacturing in general. Please give me a list of just 8 items you know that are wholly manufactured by Innoson.

Show me proof of the so-called JV agreement between IVM and those chinese coys you listed. And what did you attach those links for by the way? To show that the companies are related? Please do not insult your intelligence in that manner I went through all of them and couldn't not find anything related among the four websites.

Imagine the sort of advice beign given to this fellow who uses an android device: to shutdown automatic updates; close all running apps, bla bla bla. Then what's the point in claiming to have a fone that browses, when the only thing you are comfortable to do is just make calls?

www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-812208.0.html

And you guys tell me to dump BB for that crap? Who is deceiving who? Enjoy your phones. I'm enjoying mine.

I still haven't seen any argument convincing enough to make me dump my BB for an Android phone. I have a friend who uses an Xperia (isn't that an android fone?) But she hardly uses it for anything besides making calls and very rare browsing sessions in-between. Why? Because she gets charged for every single online activity.

With Glo Comonth at just N1,400 per month, I get to do all the browsing possible (Opera mini 6 is there to make my web-browsing more enjoyable with it's multi-tab function, so I can run as many "windows" as I like), download ANY song that comes to my head (I'm not lying), chat for free (I know that is not possible with non-RIM fones), I get all my apps and games from appworld. And I still get to have unused data at the end of the month. Someone said he has access to over 250,000 apps on android. Well how many do you actually have installed and use frequently?

Another guy was yabbing the BB for having 50% of its face covered by the QWERTY keyboard. I've played with someone's Android severally and yes it has powerful graphics, large keyboard-less touchscreen, e.t.c but what's the price of the phone? Now compare that with a BB of similar price and tell me which BB of 90k plus, still has a keyboard or drab performance?

Like I said earlier, I'm yet to be fully convinced on dumping my BB. So until Androids come with reasonably-priced phones and internet plans, they can keep their stuff.

Most of the arguments being made by the android guys somehow sound juvenile to me. Like kids with expensive toys. Sorry.

This goes a long way to show the funny shenanigans that happened during the time of that Attorney-General Aondoakaa. Upon Ibori being charged by EFCC for corrupt practices, the lawyer who isn't even supposed to be representing him, comes forward (probably on the orders of late Yar'adua) to clear Ibori of any wrong-doing. Now it is the same Ibori who has pleaded guilty.

Who is fooling who?

Well Yar'adua is no more, Aondoakaa is probably in one shit-hole or the other, banisjed there till GEJ finishes his term and James my man'll soon be chowing confirmed prison food courtesy of Her Majesty mama Charly. Justice does exist. Though it grinds slowly and in this case, is coming from our supposedly colonial masters.

Be like say Warri carry last in this case O. Just kidding.

Nigeria ex-Delta state governor James Ibori guilty plea.

James Ibori, a former governor of one of Nigeria's oil-producing states, has pleaded guilty in a UK court to 10 counts of money-laundering and conspiracy to defraud.


British police accuse him of stealing $250m (£160m) over eight years.

The prosecutor called him a "thief in government house".

James Ibori bought one London mansion for £2.2m in cash, police say

Ibori, once seen as one of Nigeria's wealthiest and most influential politicians, was arrested in 2010 in Dubai and then extradited to London.

Some $35m of his alleged UK assets were frozen in 2007.

As his trial at London's Southwark Crown Court was about to begin, Mr Ibori changed his plea to guilty and admitted stealing money from Delta state and laundering it in London through a number of offshore companies.

The BBC's Chris Summers says between 20 and 30 of Mr Ibori's supporters turned up to court - some wearing T-shirts with the slogan "Free Ibori". There was not enough room for them all in the public gallery.

“We will now be actively seeking the confiscation of all of his stolen assets so they can be repatriated for the benefit of the people of Delta state”

Prosecuting QC Sasha Wass said Mr Ibori, 53, had "tricked" his way into becoming Delta state governor, by giving a false date of birth and claiming he had no criminal record.

"He was never the legitimate governor and there was effectively a thief in government house. As the pretender of that public office, he was able to plunder Delta state's wealth and hand out patronage."

He is due to be sentenced on 16 April.


'Lavish lifestyle'

Ibori's wife, Theresa, his sister, Christine, his mistress, Udoamaaka Okoronkwo, and his London solicitor, Bhadresh Gohil, have all been convicted of money-laundering.

Their convictions could only be reported on Monday after reporting restrictions were lifted.

Nigeria's Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC) had asked the UK's Metropolitan Police to look into the ex-governor's financial affairs.

The rise and fall of James Ibori

1958: Born in Delta state, UK police believe, saying he previously lied about his age

1980s: Moved to UK

"The vast sums of money involved were used to fund Mr Ibori's lavish lifestyle," Detective Inspector Paul Whatmore, the officer in charge of the investigation, said.

1991: Convicted of stealing from DIY shop Wickes

1992: Convicted of credit card fraud

1993-4: Allies himself to Nigeria's then military ruler Sani Abacha

"We will now be actively seeking the confiscation of all of his stolen assets so they can be repatriated for the benefit of the people of Delta State."

1999: Elected Delta state governor

2007: Stepped down as governor

2007: UK assets worth $35m frozen

He said that the money Ibori stole should have been used to pay for sanitation, power supplies and healthcare for some of the poorest people in the world.

December 2007: Arrested in Nigeria on corruption charges

2009: Nigeria court dismisses charges

April 2010: Ibori's supporters attack police as they try to arrest him

Ibori spent some of the stolen money buying six houses in London - he paid £2.2m in cash for one Hampstead mansion - and put his children in expensive British private schools, police say.

May 2010: Arrested in Dubai

2011: Extradited to UK

2012: Pleads guilty to money-laundering in London court

DIY theft

How a thief almost became president

Three of the money-laundering charges relate to the sale of Delta state's share in mobile phone company V-Mobile to neighbouring Akwa Ibom state.

This raised $37m which Ibori stole and laundered through his solicitor Gohil, who has been jailed for 10 years.



In 2007, a UK court froze assets allegedly belonging to him worth $35m.

His annual salary as Delta state governor was less than $25,000.

The wife, sister and mistress of James Ibori have also been convicted of money-laundering

He had already left the UK when his assets were seized but he was arrested in Nigeria later that year.

The charges were dismissed but he was then re-arrested in Dubai on a British warrant.

Ibori has been convicted in the UK before - in 1991 for stealing, in cahoots with his wife who worked as a cashier, from the Neasden, London, branch of the DIY shop Wickes.

He was also found guilty in 1992 for being in possession of a stolen credit card and having used it to fraudulently withdraw $1,590.

Nigeria is one of the world's biggest oil producers. Under its federal system, state governors enjoy huge powers and control budgets larger than those of many West African countries.

They have immunity from prosecution while in office.

Two other former state governors have been convicted of corruption charges in Nigeria, after fleeing the UK while free on bail.

Culled from BBC News Africa.

I pity the bank staff who manage those allegedly implicated accounts. When you don't bring in accounts; issues. When you then bring high net-worth accounts of politically-exposed people, double wahala.

^^^ Enugu and Owerri have been safe places for a long time now. That much I can tell.

You say you've been in almost all parts of Nigeria. Which parts of Imo and Enugu have you lived in?

Dunno what to say. I can't remember ever being snubbed before (by a girl at least).

The wrong approach would give rise to that insult.

P.S. The verb is snub not snob. Snob relates to the person.

topsywest:
Hmmm. Nice topic. This nasty experience stands out in my memory:

Long time ago when I was about 17 some 13 years ago, I had my first job as a primary school teacher. A colleague was to get married and she selected the aso ebi of which Inwas given my share. This is over a full month to the wedding!

Gave my material to this elderly dude in my neighborhood and deposited half of the required amount with assurances from the him that it will be ready within two weeks.

To cut a long story short, on the morning of the wedding, I was at the tailor's shop to collect my already sewn cloth only to find him just sewing the it.

I almost collapsed but left his shop in rage. Ended up wearing another cloth to the wedding. A day after, I was passing his shop when he beckoned on me to come and collect the cloth, I respectfully told him that that was no longer necessary as my aim for purchasing the cloth in the first place has been defeated.

As a 17 yr old boy, he thought I was joking but realized I was serious as i kept ignoring him whenever he brought up the issue.

He reported the case to my Dad ( after he had of course threatened to do so) whom he asked to prevail on me to collect the clothes but my Dad simply told him I was matured enough to take certain decisions on my own, more over, he wasn't the one that bought the cloth material for me.

Today, this tailor is still in that shop, and to make things worst, I have my current tailor in a much younger guy who is just beside him and he sees me when ever i come to pick up already sewn clothes. He also knows I introduced some of my colleagues and most of my church members who admire my way of dressing, to that guy.

Can't imagine what goes on in his mind anytime I park my ride in front of his shop only to enter his neighbor's shop, Jeez!

Sorry it's not related to the topic but I need to get something right here. You claim in your post to be male, but your profile indicates that you are female. Which are you?

Lalaska:
Not all Nigerian Tailors are bad. My tailor delivers the exact way i want him and my clothes are always fitting. However, the only issue is that of delay which i believe is inherent in every person that does handwork. I adopted a strategy below: I agree with the tailor for the dress to be ready 2 weeks before the actual day i need it. This has effectively factored in any disappointment.

Yeah, I agree with everything you said especially as regards factoring in an additional time period to cover for delays. So if you have an engagement coming up say at the end of the month, submit your material on time and hammer the tailor to have it ready by 20th. So that way, even if the tailor is late by a week, you still have some extra time for him/her to make adjustments to your work if any is required.

Hmmm, I'm surprised to read all these negative comments about tailors. Mine has never disappointed before. Fact is the guy has always even exceeded my expectations. He's the only one I use for now even though he is located in another state. So I usually just chill and give him the materials to sew whenever I travel to Umuahia.

I didn't plan on doing any Val celebs but my sister was around and I didn't know what to get her. Fortunately a colleague brought some nice cakes for sale to the office. Bought them together with yoghurt and ice-cream. It was Ok.

Last time I did any Val thingy was in 2003, while in school. LOL