₦airaland Forum

Hannibal:
Psycho woman and Vengeance?? Is this Nollywood??
Vengeance ma $5 million ass.
Women are like toys to kids. . . . .Take em when u need em. . . . .Drop em when u get bored of em.
No thrills, no frillz.

[color=#cc0066]Did you not read that topic by a Nairalander who posted her tactics on getting revenge on a guy who broke her heart, by corrupting his company. 'Building him up, and then braking him down again'. Anyways, you only get two warnings from me.[/color]

The Sly:
To think you are going to forget him is just a fallacy. . . . .Not easy to achieve.
Things i do sometimes is to attribute the positive development that happens to me to her departure.
Thinking it wouldn't have happened if she had remained in my life. . . . . . .Things like that.

because i believe anybody who deems it fit to leave this kind of Ace is a worthless piece of **** ever created.
There is always someone better out there. . . . .No matter what happens
Life is too short. . . . . .and too sweet too, So why waste sum precious time thinking about sum irrelevant, irresponsible beings? huh?

[color=#cc0066]Yes,

I'm guessing she hurt you, because though you feel that she's gonna miss you/regret leaving you, you can't forget her, she left an impact. That's how I'm feeling, that always happens when you give all you have to a relationship, when they leave, they really do take a piece of your heart with you.

You won't be thinking about her when you're with the right person for you, because by them being right, they will tick all the right boxes.

If that doesn't ease your mind, take pleasure in the fact that you're not alone .[/color]

[color=#cc0066]Iykedee well said, funny too![/color]

[color=#cc0066]When you feel that enough time has passed to know that it is genuine and when you can no longer wait any longer before confessing it.[/color]

[color=#cc0066]The bigger problem is grooming. There is undercover grooming of young girls, I mean what explains having g-strings and thongs in the teen section of clothing stores, or having belly tops and tight mini skirts for ages 11 upwards. Why are we surprised when even models are being selected, a lot of the catwalk models are actually really young teenage girls, who are dolled up to look much more older.

We encourage women to look sexy in order to be accepted, boring or ordinary is barely tolerated, without a few snide comments about 'lack of fashion sense' or being frigid.

Media, depicts women very sexually, even sometimes the unintentional adverts do, for womens razors, underwear etc,

I don't like to nag, but yes I too have noticed this, though I didn't necessarily connect it with a genuine search for a husband. I would say most girls do it as a plea for attention from guys, maybe not husbands as such, because I thought you had to appear virginal to attract the serious type of guys who want you for more than just a one night stand. These girls are just aiming to look 'ripe' so they are more eligible.[/color]

[color=#cc0066]Hillarious stuff, only in the 21st century!!!

That is a fabulous point (if this actually occured), it just shows the power of the mind and memory. Seems that memory and emotions can be so deeply intertwined, that if bad old memories are not successfully errased, then new fonder memories cannot be made - did that make sense [/color]

The Sly:
But its hard. . . . . . . .Very hard.
I wish i could too. . . . . .But now i see no reason to forget someone like that.
It only makes me laugh errtime i remember what a sour loser she is. . . . . . .She lost this priceless being.

[color=#cc0066]Haha! I was just about to post a 'sorry about how you're feeling' type message, then I read the last line ,

*Insert long description about Topup's Ex here*[/color]

idupaul:
mind and soul can never be beautiful when the face is ugly.

[color=#cc0066]You just wait 'til you let your guard down and you fall in love with a woman you term 'ugly', because of her beautiful mind and soul.[/color]

deept:
personally, i wont if i don't plan to go all the way

[color=#cc0066]You won't commit? If you don't plan on marrying the person?[/color]

Gamine:
So whats the address?

let me add you to my blogroll

[color=#cc0066]http://twobeautifulminds(dot)(dot)com/

*I swear I joined 'blogger' but hey, I got a .com addy! *[/color]

[color=#cc0066]Have you been to ask for medical/family planning advice?[/color]

[color=#cc0066]Hehehe!

*Secretly hopes never to meet you along a dark alley way*[/color]

[color=#cc0066]If you're leading both women to believe that you are only seeing one of them and only them, that is wrong, if you are having sex with both, that is wrong, if you are only having a platonic friendship with both, then that is okay, if you have a platonic friendship with one of the women and a romantic relationship with the other, that is okay too.

Man, I don't feel it's my place to say whether something's right or not, (because at this age you should really know).

The fact that you are even asking, could show some guilt!? Am I right?[/color]

[color=#cc0066]Dedicated fans of Nairaland Posting throughout traffic.

I completely understand how you guys feel stuck in traffic, I'm currently in bed, and going nowhere anytime soon. [/color]

DeepZone:
easier said than done.

[color=#cc0066]Fact![/color]

[color=#cc0066]Thinks for a while. . .

Well, I believe the only time you can manipulate your emotions that easily is before you have entered into the relationship in the first place, when it is still in the 'we could be' phase.

I believe in the scenario you gave, you mentioned that the guy was a loser (do you mean personality or financially). I'm slightly confused because I would never be able to 'fall' for a loser (personality).

My overall conclusion is that yes, it is possible to suppress your emotions, this is infatuation, and though the initial pain for me, will be much higher and sharper than that from love, it will die down a lot quicker than love too. It is possible to suppress my emotions because from the description, I have not had the chance to become emotionally involved with the person. There would have to be more than just a one-sided connection from me, for me to through my logic into the wind and jet off with a 'loser'.[/color]

[color=#cc0066]Why do I always feel deeply apologetic when a guy has been hurt by females? I guess, it's something to do with the way we complain about not finding 'good decent' men out there, yet some women still have the nerve to go and screw up the ones that do exist!

Hey Pal! Sorry about this. About the hit 'n' run, obviously, being biased, I would advise you against it. If you keep searching for love, you will find it, if you stop, you will only find reciprocation in these hit 'n' run relationships/flings. I believe you do genuinely want someone to love, and I believe you deserve someone to love and to love you back.

My advice is to really try and take some knowledge back from these past relationships, they're the best way to learn about the qualities you're looking for and which to avoid, or even what makes these women leave. You cannot call it a fair search if all these women were approached from a similar area/friendship group/bar or club as the chances of getting women similar to your Ex is higher.

I believe, the best way also to reduce the chance of a heartbreak happening is to get to know the person very well first. Start with friendship.Through friendship you can witness the good and bad points of a potential girlfriend, as there is less pretence and bad habits aren't disguised as well. This way you can avoid going into a relationship with someone who will definitely not be good for you and you give yourself a fighting chance of surviving the relationship, as you will know what you're going into. This is obviously easier said than done. But, it is no longer good enough just entering into any odd relationship hoping that the girl has a heart of gold. You have to be smart about it.

I am here to give you hope, because love exists and it tastes even sweeter if a hard battle was fought for it (you will appreciate it more).

Take care and don't lose hope, you don't seem like the heartless hit 'n' run type, and if anyone teases you for being repeatedly fooled, be sure that if you start the search before the hit 'n' runners, you are more likely to find your pot of gold first, from that point of view, you can sit back and relax as they start to fumble as they begin their search.[/color]

[color=#cc0066]Sometimes it's completely the other way around. A guy with less money can sometimes feel like he has to work harder, a life of working harder to win the attention of women, can lead to better chat/pick up lines and better 'moves'. Whilst a guy who has been financially successful may rely on his money to do the talking.

The other side of this is that a man who has less money is less respected and so he is naturally more insecure than a man who is wealthy and is respected merely because of this fact by all.[/color]

Orikinla:
Wise women do not judge men by their quantity of cash, but by their academic and professional prospects.

[color=#cc0066]I wish to amend this to:

Wise women do not judge men by their quantity of cash, but by their integrity, aspirations and demeanour.[/color]

fntekim:
blog blog,
can i have a word with u?

[color=#cc0066]Who is this 'blog blog'?[/color]

tammyswits:
You sound like a real hot chic(i am very straight) so if he can't step up his game, let him go rot, its actually nice being single, you can flirt with anyone and wont have to feel guilty about it.

[color=#cc0066]Haha! I say quirky things like this also, glad I found someone with a like mind. It's good to be frank sometimes!! Thanks
Yes, I do agree, but to be honest, I spent the first 19 years of my life, never being in anything meaningful or serious, but part of me is grateful that I can enjoy the single life evene just that bit longer, because can you imagine if my first serious relationship lead to marriage, straight into fifth gear I'd say![/color]

[quote author=Negro_Ntns link=topic=163492.msg2703215#msg2703215 date=1219646076]Top, I can't possibly walk in your shoe to feel where it hurts. In moments like this, time heals. You are going through withdrawal and as with anything else, the transformation is a curve. The more time you spend brooding and reliving the memories, the less strong you are to leave it behind. Keep yourself busy, occupy your time with tangibles, log into Nairaland and read old threads, make new friends. In order for something new and better to begin, the old and stagnant must be buried.
Good luck girl :-)[/quote][color=#cc0066]Thank you, thank you, thank you! I did something silly and read our old saved messenger conversations a day ago, the weird thing is I expected to be sad, but instead I laughed at how funny our conversations were and how he had so many good chat up lines and how we flirted. I think that has caught up with me today, expecially as my friend told me that it is highly unlikely that he'll realise the damage he's caused or feel the need to apologise to me. Yes, I need to forget about him but I really don't feel ready to delete our messenger conversations. They are a good memory and also a good store of possible chat up lines for future use hehe!

P.s. I highlighted my favourite bits.[/color]

[color=#cc0066]Are. You. Sure. That's. Why?

Simple, because it just seems to me to be quite a dramatic ending to your relationship. There were no words said, he just saw you with it and left? Wow, drama queen! Anyways, maybe he has had issues with alcohol in the past.

If you love him more than the alcohol, then why not, but to be honest, he really didn't leave anything for discussion. If you are willing to leave all alcohol behind, then chase away (if you think he's worth it, because you're going to regret changing for someone who you eventually find out isn't worth it).

Finally, no, alcohol isn't just meant for guys, last time I checked it was unisex. Though it may also come in colours of blue and pink, it can be enjoyed by everyone.

You need to ask for the true opinion from your boyfriend, this case sounds too simple to be true.

Boy - 'It was the bottle in your hand that made me run.'
Girl - *Smashes bottle*
Boy & Girl run off into the sunset together and live happily ever after.[/color]

[color=#cc0066]Wow, I can't believe it, though I can't help the way I feel, I am reading my OP as if I am someone else, I'd advice myself to leave the guy and get my revenge by living a wonderful happy life and having a wonderful relationship with another guy. Forgetting about him is the best revenge.

I'm silly![/color]

[color=#cc0066]Hahaha! You made me smile!

Thank you!

*Like I said/wrote, I wil probably edit this after I go to sleep*[/color]

deept:
Everyone deserves to love and be loved.

My Philosophy, love with your head first and when you can trust the person, then follow with your heart.

[color=#cc0066]Hmmmm, I like! Hehehe, of course you mean, love logically first? Only love what deserves to be loved, and then you can let go once you trust the person, and love illogically, loving even their mistakes,their quirks and imperfections? [/color]

[color=#cc0066]> V a n i s h ! <

*I will probably edit this after I've slept on it, and come to my senses*

- And that's exactly what I did. So in order to fill this space. I wanted to share the what I learnt.


Forgetting about an ex who brought so much pain and hurt to you during and after the breakup is the best revenge you can give them.
Not only is it extremely mature, sophisticated and classy. It brings the best type of results.

Yes easier said than done, but once managed you can't help but say that it was worth it all along.

Whilst you're with your new woman/man, progressing in life, she/he's still resting on the false hope that they can still pull some of your heart strings.

Ex who? I say!![/color]

KarmaMod:
there's no way to work around mismatched genotype, topup

unless they want to risk having a sickler as an offspring. No person should willingly do this in the name of "love"

[color=#cc0066]I was trying not to assume that sickle cell was the threat. There are several 'genotype things', that could cause couples to worry, many other than sickle cell, though it isn't silly to assume that this could be the case here.

On top of the advice I've given already, I believe that you should seek medical advice and then look at your options, because who knows this 'genotype thing' may not have such disasterous effects if handled carefully.[/color]

[color=#cc0066]I believe it is considered possible to use both options, however the type of love as a result is different. I believe it is much easier to just choose not to love someone you originally chose to love, but it isn't as easy to get rid of the feeling buried with you naturally, because how do you go about finding the root or source, when it happened so naturally? I guess if you are choosing to love someone stubborn or unkind, you can possibly find it as easy to open your eyes to the flaws and choose not to love them anymore, since this was a conscious decision.[/color]

[color=#cc0066]Her attention to you seems divided, or she suddenly has a new 'part' of her life, like a hobby or a class, in which you are never allowed to see or take part in or visit her at. Also, she seems to pretend everything is A. O. K. when you get the underlying feeling that something's up.

You should just ask or just hire 'cheaters' crew to investigate her (though not everybody lives in America), maybe ask a friend of yours to watch her moves.[/color]

[color=#cc0066]Can you believe, one phone conversation with my girl-pal and I'm back to square one again. *sobs*[/color]