₦airaland Forum

deols: You need to try harder. I am a Yoruba person. What in Yoruba history or culture says that a woman changes her name after marriage?

and don't start to say what you don't know about. In many parts of the world, women retain their identity- the one they are born with. Even in Northern Nigeria, many women retain their Fathers' name after marriage.

It's not stated explicitly in any book but most of African culture including Yoruba culture is mostly patriarchal and as such any form of relationship is controlled by the man. It's the reality we live in today and nobody says it's cast in stone. There are women that when they get married, they retain their father's own name in addition to their husband's name and there are women that don't even bear their husband's name at all. Why there's nothing wrong with this, it can cause conflict in a marriage.

sholay2011: Is Charlyboy a Catholic? I know why I'm asking. Evidently, there are truths in his 'article'...but so much more for fawning over the pope (Pope Francis): " The most popular pope in the history of the Vatican. ..the true man of God the world has come to love...etc". We don hear.

The truth is...only God knows those that serve Him...and those that serve Him surely know Him. If all the hugging of diseased ppl that Pope Francis has been doing is from the heart and his supposed humility stems from the soul, there's a reward and if not, there's a consequence.

The issue of criticising pentecostal pastors has been overflogged. So far they're not 'extorting' from their congregation at gun point or under clear duress, learn to mind your business. So far the 'religious zombies' are not complaining, learn to face front. God, the Father of all knows everything.

Charlyboy should rather channel his energy to writing 'articles' against the cankerworms eating into the fabric of our society like corruption, bad leadership and nepotism amongst other things. Day by day, we hear how taxpayers' money are being "misappropriated" and many get away with it. This is what calls for your attention Mr. This is just a means of scoring cheap points with the public IMO.

And I hope he's saved...so that amidst all these admonition...he doesn't miss it.

Charlyboy is not even a Christina to start with. He's a practicing Harekrishna.

I think Charlyboy is spot on as this issue is also a canker-worm eating the Nigerian fabric. I don't know why we're so scared to talk about the over-religiosity of Nigerians and the fact that the supposed men of God are using this premise to dupe the gullible.

So, this story is false.

Chidinma, pls don't try to prove anything to anyone. There's nothing wrong in being mummy's girl. Those people that were taunting you just want you to get rotten like them. They can't stand seeing someone who doesn't smoke or drink like them.

Those roads are not new.

Charly Boy talks about religion is his latest article. Read below...

My guy, things are falling apart and the Center can no longer hold. People just dey craze anyhow and dem go see anyhow. Jungle don mature, HA!!! I fit faint. When I was a little boy in the city of Peterkwa, called Port-Harcourt, I was taught NEVER to use God’s name in vain. Nowadays, everybody just dey call God name anyhow dem like. When Yahoo yahoo boys dey pray for good business, dem go call Him name before they obtain. Armed robbers pray, before they go for an operation, dem go hala Him name. Some of our governors are using prayers to confuse their people as they plunder the land with impunity. Bone face Bragadoooo. Some of them these days claim they talk with God, they claim they are MEN of God, they also use God’s name to obtain big time from their congregation.


Several religious wars have been fought in God’s name, politicians loot and run down the country in God’s name, Kenyan terrorist attackers paused for prayers before they continued their killings, all they did was done in God’s name, hideous criminals operate, relying on God’s name, great crimes and atrocities are committed, all in God’s name. Chinekee God, are you there?

Throughout history, religion has been used as an excuse or driving force for some of the worst atrocities unimaginable. From prehistory to modern history, religion is for many people just an excuse to kill some people, obtain from some people, lie to some people, and cause all ‘kinda’ katakata, all in the name of God. This is not FAIR! Biko!

I was watching CNN the other day and the news of the Bishop of Limburg, Franz-Peter Tebartz-van Elst popularly called The BLING Bishop, being ordered to Rome to answer to his choice of mounting an extravagant new residence complex which blew out to at least 31 million euros ($42 million). Not too long the German church had suffered fallout from a child sex scandal. Kai! Madness!

I simply don’t understand this, using church funds to enrich ones’ self or satisfy ones’ selfish desire. $42 million, what for? Did he forget that people contributed this money, that this money was hard earned money worked for by members of the congregation?

My major concern is why he wants to destroy the mission and vision of Pope Francis, the most popular Pope since the history of the Vatican. The true Man of God the world has come to love. Which one we go talk, His reforms, His Humility, His Simplicity, His Spirituality, His exemplary life according to the teachings of Jesus Christ, why this German Bishop want to pour sand san into the pope’s “garri”. I don't know.

These days you will hear most Pentecostal pastors talk about how God spoke to them, how they were called, how they have amazing powers, bla bla bla, how they received the anointing. How they can cast and bind, I tire for all these wash wash pastors. Some of these men of very questionable background and character are all over the place now. Telling all who cares to listen how they drink Tea with the Almighty God. Some families have already been put asunder because the pastor somehow is ‘remote controlling’ wives looking for the fruit of the womb, by testing the merchandise personally. kai!

They are the real Abrakadabra in God’s name. Dem no send. I don’t know if I’m the only one confused, but I don’t see the difference between pastors and native doctors any more. If you are still sane, maybe you can help me differentiate; the craze for private jets; pastors/politicians, wearing of expensive suits; pastors/conmen wearing million dollar wrist watches; pastors/conmen, building expensive schools; pastors/politicians, casting, binding and miracle explosion; pastors/native doctors, embezzling public funds; the list is endless. These days we don't know the difference between san sand and garri. Odikwa risky. Are these pastors truly men of God or business men capitalizing on people’s frustrations? What is their original calling sef, to compete in worldly riches or to win souls like it is said?

How can you be living extravagantly when some church members can’t even afford a meal? That is the height of wickedness. Enough of the deceit, enough of turning the bible upside down to suit people’s ears while they suffer in poverty.

We need spirituality not religiosity. Even with all these churches at every junction and every bending corner, in every brothel and hotel, morality is at an all-time low. The church should be a place for spiritual nourishment and not a kalokalo venture, or for prosperity preaching. Pastors should concentrate more on how we should all be our brother’s keepers, rather than praying for us to be rich like them. God does not operate like a Babalawo, neither is he a Nigerian. I am wondering if me too won’t open my own church (runs away), but it will be different because I will never use Gods name in vain. All these our so called Men of God should come out and hustle like real men and stop using psychology to deceive people and take their money. Haba!!! I guess that is their hustle. Where is the humility that Christ talked about? If anyone is not leading by the examples of Jesus just like the pope, then his ‘Man-of-god-izm’ is very questionable. I thought they said the meaning of Christianity was to be Christ- like? I’m just wondering. Maybe I’m lost. Abeg, I rest my case joor. Man of God my ebony ass, who dash dem? I am even a better BOY of GOD than those MEN OF GOD. Gbam!

Source: LindaIkeji

shymexx: Injuries kind of affected Emeka Okafor's career. And perhaps the jinx that follows UCONN players also followed him to the NBA. Ben Gordon also never lived up to the hype. And he's more or less role player.

I think Jalil Okafor is a great prospect. The Sulaimon guy playing for Duke should also be able to have a solid NBA career.

Abeg, what's the jinx?

I don't just know what's it with Nigerian players in the NBA. They never really make it big. Since Olajuwon, no Nigerian players has been a major player for their club save for Okafor and Iguodala. But these two are not even up there. The likes of Farouk, Diogu, Azubuike, Oguchi etc are just average players who always get bought for free and they rarely make it to become forces to be reckoned with in their various clubs.

hammedkola: Nope, you are wrong. Aregbe is a name, NOT a title.

Aregbe itself is a name but when added to the other names is a title.

bbpreye.:
Afam you wouldnt have done it!
why? were you scared abi what?
What exactly were u afraid of?

I was a little bit scared but that wasn't the only reason. I just didn't care if it was positive or negative.

Yeah, i do. Here it is https://www.nairaland.com/1425756/whats-hiv-status-heres-mine

I was prompted to take the test because of an application that i was filing and they needed to know my HIV status else i wouldn't have done it.

CFCfan: California is 122 times the total area of Lagos State, but Lagos has about half the population of California.
California's population is 38 million.

Lagos is put at 9 million according to the 206 census.

burning_spear: How long do you have to sit down and continue pointing to where the doer of deed would have done better? Why do we always have to point to the pastors? Don't you have neighborhood? Don't you see the helpless, the needy and orphans in the hospitals, centers, prisons and roadsides in your area? What have you really done to help share this love and hope Christ died for? You drive past that widow. You drive past those people clustered at the bus stop waiting for the unavailable buses.

Keep point to others instead! Accusers of the Bredren! Can't you light up your own very closet and then environment, first?

it seems you know me very well to know that i'm not playing my part. I'm doing mine and the church should do their because that's what they represent and people like me should be taking after them in that regard.

Satan gives them a very heavy knock on the head On a more serious note i've always wondered that also. I used to sleep in church especially in night services and the sleep is usually the strongest and sometimes, i would wish that a bed be presented to me at that spot. The funny thing is that i always pray that the service comes to an end as soon as possible and when the service eventually comes to an end, the sleep disappears.

I don't even believe most of those people are who they claim to be. They know Nigerians like such stories, so they capitalize on that to make some money and grow the ministry of the stomach.

I heard he's very good but hope he doesn't end up like Emeka Okafor who was expected to be one of the best but fell short of those expectations.

The guy sure knows how to sing too. He could make a good musician too.

WOW!!! Those images are out of this world.

gothrones: If indeed the man has a right imposed by nature, then he surely will not have this problem. Comparing a woman trying to claim right to having a penis to that of naming her child is absolutely nonsensical, and I am sure you know that. How can it be nature if we are arguing about it? There was a time that men were lords over women, but that time is fast coming to an end. We are not cavemen anymore and we live in a time of equality. A man does not own a child. They both do. The mere fact that the husband is helpless in this situation completely destroys your "nature" argument, for it were nature, then one cannot change it.

You see how you people take a little part of someone's comment and make a big deal out of it. I mentioned that men are imposed some rights by nature or popular wisdom but you just chose to stick with "nature" to fulfill your argumentative fantasies. And nowhere have i said a man must reserve some specific rights. I've always been of the opinion that men and women could switch roles but must never assume the same roles cos it will cause conflicts. Since we're not cavemen anymore and women seem to be gaining some momentum as far as marriage is concerned, what do you advise is done in situation such as that of the OP? Should the woman leave the marriage if the husband insists that the child mustn't be spoken to in Yoruba or does she struggle it out with her husband until he used kondo to break her head? There are some things that can only be obtained in a Utopian setting and not in practical sense. The way around it is to discuss these issues before getting into marriage. If a woman wants to be the head of the family, she should discuss it with her prospective husband and see what he thinks about it.

wesley80: They dont necessarily have a free hand to do what they like, rather they are accepted the way they are and transformed by the Word of God. Stop speaking with authority over things you dont know.

What's the difference between what yolu said and what i said? The point is that CE is a liberal church that doesn't dwell on rules like other people do. I've seen people who dress nlike prostitutes enter the church and were not questioned. I've seen guys who made their hair, wear earings and swagger their way into the church not been looked down upon. That's something you don't see in other places. I'm a quasi Christ embassy member and i know all these.

Lol@gragraly

adaobi123: Ohh I never knew lol.

People would naturally gravitate to a place where they will be given a free hand to do as they choose. That's what led a lot of people to Christ embassy and their population keeps growing as young people continue protesting against the restrictive nature of some places of worship.

adaobi123: So you can wear trousers and not cover your hair in nigerian churches ? Alleluia !!

This isn't news. That's why the population of young people in Christ Embassy is astronomical.

adaobi123: But I've tried, it just doesn't work for me.

I give up !

Lol I also gave up on some Harry porter movie likewise some Indian movies.

adaobi123: Yes o Harry Potter. I fell asleep watching the first movie. Rubbish

Movies like that can be boring but if you overcome the boredom, such movies can be a delight. I felt the same way with "Game of Thrones". I feel the same way when i'm watching Bollywood movies.

From all the OP has said, i think Christ Embassy fits the description perfectly.

gothrones: Isn't that what you have been doing all along? You claimed that the man is the head. You talked about marital roles. You have been advocating for the man's rights in almost all your comments; but heavens forbid that a woman have her own rights. The child has a first and last name given by the father; but if the mother wants to give the child a middle name, then she is "claiming rights." The child must speak the father's language, but if the mother wants the child to speak her own language too, then she is "claiming rights." I detest how women's rights in Nigeria do not matter.

Maybe i should go to church one day and claim my right to preach on the alter. There's an extent to which your right can take you. The man has a right imposed on him either by nature or popular wisdom. The woman should not try to take that away from him just as he wouldn't take the woman's own unique rights. Can the woman claim the right to have a penis? Let her stick to what she was given and stop trying to take another person's role. And i don't know why people always see the female role as being tantamount to slavery. It's not anybody that's born to be a leader. I know a guy that says he can't be the owner of the business or even the head of a managerial position because he's talented at being a follower. It's only someone who's an oliver twist that will want to assume numerous responsibilities especially if someone is already handling some of these responsibilities.

A number is just a number. I don't know why people read meanings into everything. Though i know some people just don't want to have anything to do with strange things. I remember when my Email inbox was showing 666 unread messages and i had to read some to reduce it to 663 but it kept getting back to 666, so i logged into my other mail and just sent a dummy message to make it 667

Castroii: what makes you think so?

You're probably an Igbo who live or probably grew up in the North.

Chillisauce: My dear, she will drag you backwards. You will start feeling lazy to go to church.
Time to prepare your kids to church, she won't do it, you on your own I trust Naija guys Sha, wey the strength.

The only thing here is when those kids are grown up, some may join you. But I doubt that because your wife must have given them her own doctrine.

If you love her, you can go ahead, she may go with you sometimes for a function but her mind won't be there.

Ehen, na here wahala dey start. No, she won't go with him cos she's Atheist. he shouldn't go into marriage thinking that she would even escort him to the street where the church is located let alone going to church.

matnx: Are you really serious? A woman has no right to her child? All these man made customs!!! You should read about different cultures of the world since obviously are really shortsighted and naive. He has no right to deny her of giving her son a yoruba name! Her son is both Esan and yoruba by the way. In the future he will fit in perfectly if he knows both languages. The child can choose any of his inherited custom in the future will it kill him later if he decides to be identified later on in life as a yoruba man for some reason let's say politically?
In fact i just find your comment really disturbing and ridiculous!!

Some of you think marriage is a place where you go to claim right. Maybe since she can name her child by a Yoruba name since the child is equally Yoruba, how about cooking Yoruba and Esan food equally and not forgetting playing Yoruba and Esan music turn by turn. If we go like this then marriages will become like a troubled nation like Nigeria that will need a conference to solve. It's not by force to be in marriage. If you must marry then the two of you have to agree on how you want to live together. You don't go into it spoiling for war.

These are those stereotypes usually associated with some groups. Every group is stereotyped one way or the other and you shouldn't base your thoughts on stereotypes. Just get to know the person you're getting married to. You're marrying an individual and not a community.

Aregbe has a literal meaning. Doesn't it? I doubt the meaning is "Aregbe the Son of Balogun of Ibadan land". It sounds like a chieftaincy title and the real meaning will be known when we find out the meaning of Aregbe.