₦airaland Forum

Kirchoffs:
Hello familylanders, so I brought this topic here cos I know this part of NL is filled with mature people. I met this girl sometime in February and she has become a very good friend to me , we talk alot and I try my best to advice her.

She stays with her aunt because her real mom passed on when she was about 4years old and the relationship between she and her father isn't cordial. Recently she opened up to me about how her aunt's husband has been abusing her sexually the man comes into the house when no one is around and rapes her , she has reported the man to her aunt and the woman seems powerless to do anything about it . I was shell shocked when she told me because I only hear of such stuff from a distance not that it happens to someone I happen to know.

Please I need your advice on how to help her , she is a young lady of just about 22years.

Lanruze:
I beg Nigerians in the name of GOD ALMIGHTY...

Please evict this lady so she doesn't pollute innocent, sane, productive young minds. PLEASE..

Handsum64:
These are Christians as usual
You won't allow polygamy in peace yet as hypocrites you are worse with several partners while preaching monogamy and abstinence.
Gush

omakay:
A lot of us here have children who are above 20yrs yet cannot disclose details of family property until one is no longer around and someone takes undue advantage.

Maybe the father and the brother had an agreement that involved that house and the brother is only fulfilling what might be the clause in the agreement. MAYBE ooooo. Before una begin shout here anyhow.

Because of the unnecessary secrecy of the father, we will never know.

mariahAngel:
Hehehehehehehehehehehe

RightToReject:
Mama de mama, you have been in laughing galore everywhere with some wise submissions.

AutoChick4U:
She's probably too beautiful and fooled him into thinking she's supportive. Most men can easily be deceived when it comes to financial support

Bhus21:
Quick update to this thread. After much consideration and giving my wife the chance to make amends, I've decided to end our marriage. We will be getting a divorce and work together on co-parenting our kids. I needed to be able to tell my kids when they're adults that I tried my best and I can say now that I did. So my conscience is clear and I can move on to the next phase of life.

One of the things I read that was important early on was that no important decisions should be made within the first 90 days. I successfully negotiated those 90 days with the attitude of working on the marriage. My wife on the other hand couldn't see past her ego and pride and was stuck on her resentment and perceived slights. After 90 days I finally decided there was nothing to hold on to anymore and that I was too valuable to wait around for my wife to choose and return to me. So I'm letting her go, let her go find her happiness elsewhere while I nurse myself back to life.

Thanks to all those that advised here. To those that were disparaging, understand thatLong-lasting decisions with serious consequences on others should never be taken in a rash manner.

WibusJaga:

That's no good enough reason to cheat.
So sex should now be like food; 3 square meals sex a day, morning afternoon & night.
Just tell us you are a Nympho & would cheat on your husband.

Biglittlelois:
This has always crossed my mind most times, and I always come up blank, even the all knowing Google always bring up unsatisfactory answers(to me anyway) so i decided to bring it here for more discussions, suggestions, and answers

Why are countries referred to as "she" and not "he"?

angelfallz:
What do you mean by, "some people actually lounge"?

angelfallz:
Yes, I saw the caveat. But you would sha still fail the exam.
You know what you hate but instead you chose to write what you like about it.

angelfallz:
Nice write up. It is really wonderful that you love your work.

However, the question was, what do you hate about your job or place of work?

This is how Nigerians would be failing exams and be blaming the wicked lecturer/teacher /WAEC/JAMB

RightToReject:
One problem almost all of you in this kind of situation has is putting a wrong price or meaning on peace, love, maturity, wisdom, civility, etc., from the inception of your relationships.

From the connotation of your submissions:

- While courting her, you gave her an impression that she can always do whatever makes her happy, instead of what is right regardless of whether it makes her happy, all in a bid to appear a civil/modern - wannabe libertarian - because you didn't want to lose her. Now that she has started living your philosophy in fullness, you have started complaining and appearing weak and helpless.

- The fact that you have put a wrong price on peace is the reason why you have brought this matter here instead of sitting her down and read the riot act out to her that the price of peace (love in general) in the house and union is everyone striving hard in doing what is right at any given time; else, war will take center stage and mean it in words and actions. No, you won't do this because of feeble-mindedness glossed with the false garb of maturity/emotional intelligence.

In summary, put an ethical philosophy that is humane in place and let it be the bond that will hold two of you and the union in general.

Mercychen:
What advice do you want us to give you here?
To tell you to stop her from helping her family?
Is it your wife's money you want to depend on? abi which one is she caters more for her family at the expense of your pressing needs?

Oh... The reason you married her was because she was supporting you financially. So, now she withdrew the resources and channels it to her family, you're having a difficult time accepting that change.

Please let her be. You should hustle to meet your immediate familys pressing needs. Not like she's even asking you for money to send to them. Her hard earned money.

You men don't know what you want. A woman is dependent, wahala. A woman is independent, problem.
Chilax, abeg!

Jacku:
smh again...


Uhhmmm...Do you need an intern?

chukzyfcbb:
Yea I do agree.

When the client issue gets resolved, I feel like superman/Thanos

Above all, I kinda like that I get to wear many hats coz I think it makes me more desirable in the market place but potential to burn out

But yea, we moveeeeee

Narnah:
May I know what job role this is? From your description you do the work of a Customer Service rep, Data Analyst, HR Personnel, Project manager etc.

Jacku:
smh... And using them for?

chukzyfcbb:
Why are you smiling, are you also wearing similar shoe?

chukzyfcbb:
Work in tech.

I am required to be an octopus (posses multi-cross skills)...........A very fast paced and mentally tasking role

Not easy but we move.

Jacku:
i like you, for real. What's your job about? Mind me asking?

Klass99:
At 1 - Now I totally get you. That was my experience too when we worked from home during Covid, at my sister's organization HR and the CEO believed their people weren't working at all and just lounging.

2 & 3 - Actually had me LOL , this bit in particular ''because everything is urgent else someone would die so there is serious juggling of resources.''

Yashica:
Proof

Oyerinde16:
I really envy doctors and I say kudos, I was sick recently and a doctor placed me on admission and drips, I had taken drips uptil like 10pm when the doctor on night said its better I go home that night, but I objected and preferred to stay till the next morning... What I saw with my two naked eyes through that night was an I saw, if I had known I would have gone home... I saw them rushed people in pain, psychological disturbed people, accident victims with blood dripping, I saw what I shouldn't have seen, the two doctors on call at the emergency units were kept busy all through the night, the next morning I left there and never to be admitted in an open ward again, I would rather pay anything to get a private ward, But in all I give it to God, then the docs...

MrFinbarr:
Shut up please. This silly generalization is becoming really annoying and stale. I hate it that every time I introduce myself as a doctor, next remark I get is "doctors like women".... Like, wtf!!!

I don't even understand where that generation stems from because a good number of my male colleagues are very responsible and reserved men. Enough of this stupidity!!!

wunmi590:
Let me go straight to the point, my boss is stingy, so she likes cutting corners, and until the whole corners are block before she now goes back to the real solution, which would now make him spend more money....

Abeg I don tire for that my oga

wunmi590:


I hate it when my boss doesn't do the right thing at the right time and at the end of the day, the whole thing fall back on me...