₦airaland Forum

Olorunnim:
Do you mean assassin? because there's no mention of killing anyone here na thief she thief she didn't kill.

Double post.

Olorunnim:
Do you mean assassin? because there's no mention of killing anyone here na thief she thief she didn't kill.

It is a Yoruba word for spell or curse.

Some people are cursed to misbehave or do things that would bring disgrace to them and/or family.

It is like hearing Davido or Wizkid duping people of N50k about.

Hamachi:
Do u know that...
Some of the problems we have today in our marriages, is from our upbringing.?
Ok wait lemmi explain!!!

The way we were brought up comes back to affect our marriage.

I have a friend who as a growing child, her dad was the breadwinner. He paid their fees, have money for foodstuffs , paid the rent and helped dem with their home work. Her mum was a nurse but her father still played his role. She grew up with the mentality that a man should be d one to provide for his family She got married to a man who in his own family, his dad had abandoned the home affairs to his mother. She would hustle from morning till night just so dey can eat. She paid their rent and fees. Mind u, his father was not broke oh!

Now wen they got married,She expected him to bring money for feeding...wosai!! The man don dress go work. He didn't know she was angry. And sincerely he was just being normal .He didn't know he was doing something wrong. When kids started coming nko? My friend was mad. She was dying inside. To her, he should know wat to do as a man. She stopped buying the kids pampers and food. Until he brought money.

The quarrels came
The fighting came ,
the name callings came and
the beatings came too.
His family saw her as a wicked wife.
do u blame them? mbanu

That was wen i came in. I told her if u have the money,buy it. They are ur kids too. She heard me and started buying things at home.Then came the next complain "he does not appreciate my efforts "

I had a talk with him and from our discussion, i knew where the problem was coming from....his background. He kept saying..."cant she do it? After all my mother did it since i was born till date. Wat is she doing dat i wont hear word.?" See eh, any mentality u grow up with,especially wen it was practiced by people u hold dear, e dey hard to leave u. So i told my friend to keep talking to him. let him know dat d woman is only a helper not a bread winner.

In my own house, na me dey fix bulb if e die. Cos if i dont, dat warri guy no care. Na me dey fix my door handle ,or call plumber if the taps have issues. At first, i been dey vex say which kind man no go maintain him house? We stayed in a house for 3yrs without a lock on our door cos he didnt even notice it was bad. Me too i comot face. If he wont do it, let it be like that

Until i went to warri for holidays...they were all using touch to bathe in the bathroom and there was light, when i asked, they say the bulb don die since. inukwa? Bulb of how much.?
The money to buy it was not the problem but nobody mind even go there.

Am still talking sha
Something he grew up with, e go take time to change.
If i didnt understand the problem, we for dey fight everyday

U marry man wey family no dey do any gathering .Dem no even know their papa bday. Everybody on him own.
Then u want him to always be at home,care for u ,remember ur anniversary and birthdays...u enter one chance.
Wen u start complaining,he will see u as a nag.
before u know,fight don start,e go pack leave ur house.Even with dat, e no see wetin dey wrong oh!

Its not just the men,we women too get our own.

I believe communication can solve most of the problems dat fighting will cause.

It is now in our hands to train our kids the right way.Not just our daughters oh!
Becos if u train dem well igoring the boys,ur well trained daughters will end up marrying the untrained guys.Taking us back to square one

Lets give our children the best training with sound morals so dat their generation of marriages will be sweeter than ours.

i rest my case.
#copied!

I very well agree with you hence courtship is to know yourselves to establish compatibility.

I am curious.

How do ladies offer men sex?

nlPoster:
What's the exact problem so we know how to advise you, op.

Is it the fact of the man or he was wearing a skirt? Which one did you find offensive?

Chimo!

computergeek:
So that's how this girl's life has just been destroyed? For having sex outside the school environment? And the boy's face didn't even show in the video.

I'll keep saying it. Ladies need to be smarter. The moment you agree to making a sex tape is the moment you hand over the reins of your life to someone else. No matter how much you love and trust him, wait till his friends place him on a stupid dare. He'll just hide his face and destroy your life. Be smart. Some ladies won't even know they are being recorded by these blackmailers and predators.

I think fish brain phenomenon is real.

Heard they were recorded by a friend of the guy who wanted to sleep with the babe and bobo said no.

You are in 300L, one year to go and you roll with a guy in rehab without sense.

Anyways, they are both expelled together and fvck all day long.

AjayOfficial:
Okay just recently my cousin got married,wedding ceremony was held in the east, Enugu state to be precise. A lot of people graced the occasion from far and near across states in Nigeria, but d attendants that got my attention was a family friend,a couple that flew in from Kenya. They are Nigerians but now based in Kenya. I took care of their travel arrangement and here is the breakdown;
: Return ticket from Kenya to Lagos N290k ×2 = 580k
: Return ticket Lagos to Owerri (because Enugu airport is closed) 46k × 2 = 92k
: Land transportation Owerri to Enugu 25k (chartered car)
: Hotel (5 nights) 75k
: chartered cab to move around 40k
Then feeding and other miscellaneous expenses which I cannot calculate, but those expenses listed above amounted to N712k.
So my thought was why not stay put in Kenya and send the couple even 500k and do video call to congratulate them rather than spending that much to come down here to shake their hands,take photographs and give them 50k inside brown envelope (that is the amount my cousin said the man gave him).

So guys what do u think, I don't know if am making sense oh but that is my own opinion to the matter.

First, I do not understand the entitlement mentality that makes you think that your cousin is entitled to the family's N500k.

Even your thread asks if it is fair. Fair to whom? Who is the wronged party here? Do a couple cannot decide how to spend their N712k again?

Secondly, that couple in addition to attending your cousin's wedding hooked up with relatives, lost friends, reconnected with Nigeria, enjoyed road trips and even had a mini-honeymoon.

I think it is poverty that makes us value money above the presence and show of love.

A relative I had not seen in years came for my wedding. She thought I had forgotten her till I told her a slang from years back and she laughed heartily.

The next time I saw her, she was dead.

I value that memory above whatever money she would have given us.

Experience, memories is key for me.

Gosh, we are too transactional.

How can a chemist be stealing goats and mobile phones?

Hope this is not asasi?

@OP:

Rich kid problems.

No law states a wife should hand over her inheritance to her hubby.

However, some parents tie their daughter's inheritance to marriage and even will the properties to the hubby on the wedding day.

Maybe too much AM sha.

crackhaus:
Interesting...

Even the culture which is usually touted as the most unfair to women is not that unfair after all.

I do not think Igbo women inherit land in their village. I believe wives can farm on their husbands' lands though if Nollywood uncles don't take it from them.

I doubt culture stops an Igbo man/woman from adding their offspring to their wills (for non-landed properties in the village).

Truthfully, everyone's experience is dependent on their families and husbands.

No matter how restrictive Hausa's culture can be, no one can stop Dangote from handing over his empire to his daughters if he so wills.

Hahahahahahahaha

I don't know if I am a believer of this great romance or not.

The thread is just a great comic relief!

Congrats to the expectant mother, Goodluck to the deactivating husband.

To my fellow spectators, una do.

EASY112:
I guess u are deeply in love, follow your instincts. If he truly love u, he will come for u.just take it easy

Love kwa?

The guy doesn't even like her.

viceddy95:
And there is one guy now,trying his best to make you happy ,loving you the best way he could,even paying some of your bills but look at you now,falling inlove with a player..hope after he chop ,clean mouth and run,you won't say all men are dogs....

Go and be loyal to your current boyfriend ,,so that you won't start attending programs ,where they are sharing husbands in the nearest future...

Shalom.....

Hahahahahaha

aminusodiq:
there is nothing like charm here... u are basically in love !!! here is the tactics_ he pulled up a fight so go Tru a lil emotional stress, you get traumatized ND call him severally!!! by d time he picks up, u will b willing to do anything he requested!!! by dah time u will be thoroughly f*ucked in disguise of makeup sex!!!! dats d logic... alot of guys use it!!! it works like magic!!!

P.S. - he maynot b a player like all others claimed... he might just b doing everything in his ability to get u laid as soon as possible!!! in as much as his not so sensitive abt ur boss!

He is a player (only interested in sex).

If he liked her as a person (let's not even get to love), he will be interested in everything that concerns her body.

dominique:
Low self-esteemed men, steer clear of established, achieving women. Last I checked, village mgbekes are still very much available. If you're threatened by a PhD holder, go for an NCE or OND holder. Who are you to decide what level of education a lady should attain?

As in.

I find the responses on this thread funny and tomorrow same people tell us how their mothers did everything and held the fort in their homes.

pocohantas:
I am very particular about who I date or associate with. Right from my university days, guys always called me "proud" "arrogant", because I didn't see the need for majority of those relationships that was just a sex fest.

What the average Naija guy wields in a relationship is most times money and that money isn't even a lot (to me). The problem is, Nigerian girls are just too physically and mentally lazy to do better for themselves. Na why we dey see all this nonsense talk online.

jaxxy:
The way guys glorify this money thing in a relationship is nauseating, well it’s the gals i blame. Poverty mentality has finished Nigerian relationships. Everything money and yet u call it a relationship? Call it an escort service abeg.

Hahahahaha!

NiCurious:
Excellent. Both men and women should have higher expectations of each other, than a lot of what I've been seeing.

That said...if a woman is on her own feet financially, we return to the question...what does a man provide her in marriage?
Could it be companionship? Intellectual stimulation? Complementary skills? A listening ear? (Aside that whole parenting thing--talking about what the woman herself gains from marriage.) Can she not get these things without marrying? Is she guaranteed these things if she marries? Only if she chooses well.

This is one of the few comments that have caught my attention here.

Most of the guys here are yapping things related to money.

If a woman can treat herself and offer herself the world, then what does the man really have to offer?

I also like the conclusion....

A baby girl has to choose well for herself.

Nice thread.

Happy men's day to all the men out there.

Your marriage is what you make of it.

Life is not a bed of roses yet some people have learnt how to enjoy their lives within moral boundaries.

So also, marriage has challenges (job loss, delayed child birth, stubborn in-laws, frustrating bosses, things not working out as planned etc.) however if they both genuinely love themselves, they would enjoy their marriage and overcome all the challenges together.

As for Telemundo, I don't understand the appeal. I do not find love triangles interesting or appealing.

I love when a man genuinely loves a woman, makes her blossom and she also works towards pleasing him.

There is no place for a third wheel.

I also do not find spineless women and stupid men aka drama queens and kings interesting. Apologies to the Telemundo fans.

I think Telemundo is just a way to escape the harsh realities of the society just how some others turn to drinks, sex or drugs.

KillerBeauty:
Asin eh. I'm a single lady and I leave home for work 5am and cone back home 6pm. I don't even have time for myself not to talk of visiting friends.

So I don't understand how a married man will be hanging out with friends 3-4 times a week and spending 7hrs there.
Is he jobless?
Are his friends jobless?
Where does he find the time to gist about football and drink beer for 7hrs straight 3-4 times a week?

I think OP is exaggerating.

7hrs hours 4 times a week?

That is like 4pm - 11pm 4times a week.

RoyalBlu:
No kids yet, and he's this way?


This is the best time to strengthen your bond.

Make him understand you are his priority, not his friends.

It's well.

They don't sound like they have common interests.

Jadeobee:
The thing is, he never takes me out on dates. We never do things together but he is so quick to meet up with his friends. I’ve followed him to his friends house very few times and I just don’t enjoy listening to men talk about football and drink beer. Even when they come to our house, it’s the same thing. Sincerely, those are his friends and not mine I shouldn’t have to follow him around like a parrot . It’s like he puts his friends before everything and everyone. I’m sick and tired of him

Na wa for you.

He takes you to his friends place, you don't like their discussions. Should they discuss what you like?

Doesn't these friends have wives? Don't you have a common thing to discuss or worse case, entertain your husbands together.

Once in a while, when he watches ball at home, make/buy some snacks, put his feet on your laps and massage them while he watches.

Seeing hot men run around the field chasing a ball with passion is enough incentive to watch football.

Jadeobee:
My husband is starting to irritate me. He is always visiting his friends every minute, in a week it’s at least 3-4 times. Sometimes when we’re meant to spend quality time together, he will go to his friends house and spend 6-7 hours and come back at like 12am. If it’s not his friends, then he is on the phone with one family member for hours discussing one issue or the other. Every minute it’s one friend issue or family issue, I’m starting to think this is not normal. After discussing this problem, many times he claims he will try to change and find a balance but it only gets worse. I’m the homely type he is the outgoing type, but he can’t stay in one place. I don’t want to push him away from his people but for goodness sake, must he go to see his friends every minute, I just think it’s unreasonable. One of my friends also complains about the same thing, why are some men like this for crying out loud ?

Could it be that he feels your irritation and goes further from you?

Or why would a man marry you and do everything possible to be away from you?

GODSBEAUTY:
DUBAI toy

What kind of debasement is this?

Does the lady not have dignity for herself?

I studied the nature of sex. The nature of love. I don’t go into relationships for sex because love is paramount to me. There is nothing more riveting than sexual love, together. Real genuine sexual love,” she enthused.

I very well agree with you ma.

Maybe I have not studied the nature of sex however, I am very fascinated about genuine sexual love too.

That's why I don't believe that you can genuinely love someone and cheat with them.

Notice I said genuine love not 'Nigerian' made love.

I should find out more about this woman.

Interesting perspective on Obodo Oyibo marriages where the husbands used the wives.

Isn't it what is still playing out in Nurse wife marriages?

The last picture is cool.

Lovely pictures.

God continually bless their homes.

Decolonel:
But wait oo, who maths epp?. All these students who used to score highest in maths that year, where are they?. Have they used their maths skills to calculate the exact time Jesus Christ will come?.

Mathematics helps in analytics and problem solving skills.

I so much love Mathematics and English.

Strange bed fellows, I know.

LordKO:
It's nothing new. Most African Americans, especially those without established name, are always looking for every meaningful opportunity to rivet with any African rooted family, so his action has nothing or little to do with his wife's power.

Interesting.

So the husbands' lineage dies or he hypenates the surnames?

I need to read up on it more.

So we can't even compare with our cultures.

LordKO:
It's nothing new. Most African Americans, especially those without established name, are always looking for every meaningful opportunity to rivet with any African rooted family, so his action has nothing or little to do with his wife's power.

.