₦airaland Forum

Bludeville: Ignorant fool. You think that I am one of your brainwashed sissies that take marriage to be the be-all an end all.I lead a very fulfilling life and I don't need a man's stamp/signature to make me feel complete. Wake up dude, it is the 21st century.

God bless you jare. I shake my head @ any man who foolishly thinks I need him for anything. What nonsense. I will submit only to my husband and ignore every other fool that thinks i shd bow to him. Nonsense

ade2008: i will not bec .birds of the same feather flocks together. bad manner corrupt good manner. being friend to a divorcee may end up soiling my relationship with my wife.the best advice she can only give my wife is how to divorce me.

See how dumb you are? What if she left her husband because he was a wife beater? Or molesting their children. It is assh0les like you that make women staying in marriage and die there all in the name of bearing MRS. Change you line to thinking, it is just bush.

afam4eva: Some of these corpers are people's parents. i wonder how their kids will feel seeing their parents being dehumanized like this. We too overdo for this country sef.

Abegi! I dont see how this is dehumanizing. Just to kneel down. These soldier are tough and they train u like a soldier. I went to camp, it was mad annoying, but its just camp, 3 weeks, I coped so will they

Part of the reason why I still dont have a nanny or a help is because I fear what they can do to my kids. My husband was molested at a very young age so I know there r ppl around that you think you can trust but are just predators. God save us all

berem: I have been trying to ask this question over and over again.why do mothers get almost all the blame when a child displays very bad behaviour?

I know of a family friend whose 2 grown up kids are always involved in crime though one of them died as a result of cult activities few months ago.

Apart from taking care of the family financially, the man is seldom present to take care of his kids since when they were small.

He's always travelling due to the nature of his business. Their mum being a house wife has been taking care of the boys.

Now that one of them is dead, the husband and his relations are heaping the blame on the woman for not doing her responsibilities as a mother taking care of them.

Why should mothers be blamed?

Since they are boys I believe it was up to their father to train them. I tell my hsband all the time "these kids are for 2 of us, its not just me". Its both their faults bt I blame the Dad more cos a man should train a man.

I made a 3rd class. At first I was lying on my cv but after a bit I quit and decided to run my own show. I have to say that I am the happiest I have ever been. I do my own thing, make my own money and I have time to do the things I love to do. Amazing right?

Please get over yourselves!

Please if she trusts you enough to tell you the truth about things in her past, then you should also respect that trust and not tell anyone else. I have done things I'm not proud of in my past and so has my husband. Of course I will make him seem like prince charming to my father (I'm Daddy's girl you know) or he will not want him. So even if you guys have issues in future, you sort it out between yourselves. It's that simple. Don't bring in outsiders.

ziqqz: ...and when I take it upon myself to chase you until i [successfully] squeeze and suck that bre.ast too, ppl will say i'm a home-breaker.
no wahala, continue nah, my own is dat if i find you, and d bre.ast manages to still look attractive, i will be sharing it part-time wit ur husband

hahahaha slowpoke!!!!

Mind your damn business. My babies harassed me die n church so I know how it is. How many times will miss the word because I'm breastfeeding? The best can do is cover the breast but will neither go out or deprive my child.

Men have always been stupid, nothing new in that. The slightest excuse sends them to another womans arms. Will I deprive my child or kill myself for them? HELL NO!!

From reading everyones posts about this money in marriage issue, I must say that my husband is one in a million. We never have these money challenges. I mean NEVER. He never asks me to spend on the family. He always wants to give me money for everything. Söme times when its time to watch a movie though he is like "cash madam, oya buy the ticket'! It's never by force and I never wait for him to ask me to. I'm not going to ask for money to go to market. Once I say, I need to go the market, he hands over cash, once I say, even in passing, "my clothes are getting old"he hands over cash. I love you baby!!!!

From reading everyones posts about this money in marriage issue, I must say that my husband is one in a million. We never have these money challenges. I mean NEVER. He never asks me to spend on the family. He always wants to give me money for everything. Söme times when its time to watch a movie though he is like "cash madam, oya buy the ticket'!

From reading everyones posts about this money in marriage issue, I must say that my husband is one in a million. We never have these money challenges. I mean NEVER. He never asks me to spend on the family. He always wants to give me money for everything. S

rosita112: Recently, I noticed my 4yr old Son saying the word SHAME to his yonger brother who is 18mths for peeing. My toddler is being potty trainned at the moment.

I was totally shocked and explaind to Him that there is nothing shameful for his brother peeing on himself that its only a potty accident and that sometimes other kids do the same too. I asked him were he learnt that and he told me his teaher in class asked everyone to say shame to a particular GIRL IN HIS CLASS AFTER SHE had a potty accident(probably peed or pooed on herself in class)

I find this rather disturbing and want to have a talk with the school authorities as this is a Church owned private school. I expect better from them. what are they instilling into the Children? Its never ok to shame a child for peeing on him or herself it may cause the child to have low self esteem and it may also encourage bullying.

I am thinking of changing his school at the moment but maybe next term.

Please what are other parents veiw on this issue?

Very wrong. One day I went to pick my son from school and he had wet his pants. He had just been potty trained and wasn't comfortable using the school toilet. Then a little girl said, said, 'He peed in class, Shame". The tin touched my spirit men. I was so upset but I just tried to laff it off cos I didnt want the children to feel bad. Please if you are a teacher in this forum dont do it. Its bad very very bad.

ogbonlowob: Please, kindly respond to this if you know: If I do a GTB online transfer from my current to another persons account, still in GTB, will I get instant alert same day. How long does it take to hit the other persons account in summary? 1hr., or more or less? Thank you very much

If you do a trabsfer to any gtbank, it is instant. Immediate and enters right away.

ANGELSDIAPERS: 2756A5CE

I just want 1 carton. Any hope for me?

Kayyy: i'm so delighted having read the last few responses, there is hope after all, even in nigeria, the first few responses got me seething and wondering are people just this selfish and self centred and yet want to be in marriage, do they understand marriage itself is about companionship, carry each other, why is it convinient for people to just want to use their fellow people, how does a woman feel when a man takes two shifts, and other businesses in order to meet ends in the house while the woman a grown up graduate works and says "you 've got no right to ask me to contribute, it is not compulsory", and you wonder the kind of stress that kills such men when they are into their 50s-60s. my views about this topic is summarized below

To the poster that described the current generation of men as lazy, i think the opposite is the case here, all my life having grown up within women who are semi-literate, that read only to college/secondary school, having watched them from shop owners at balogun, and other markets, distributors for manufacturing companies like nasco, uac, wamco etc having watched how these women have built their homes along with their husbands, how at some point they had to fend for themselves and the family, how some even set-up business for their husbands, how many men took loans from such wives to build themselves today and didnt even repay all the loans, how my mum would leave home 5.30am in the morning to get to her shop at yaba, how sometimes my dad can help drop her to a closer bus-stop and sometimes he's even sleeping till 6.30am cos of tiredness of the previous day work, while her wife is already at yaba by 6.30 till they got a bus through their joint contribution, how all through all this she's calling our house help to make sure food is ready for us before she gets home, how she then spends time with us till she goes to bed to wake up for the same routine for almost 2-3 yrs before she got her bus, yet she never saw her husband as lazy not even one arguement about laziness nad finaces, how she contributed loads to what business her husband has achieved today, even millions of unpaid loans yet she takes the little reward he gives her and appreciates it and he does reward her, how she paid for UK masters degree for two children while my dad only paid the third one when he became bouyant, i once told him, with the way you struggled with your finances before you could stand , if you married in this generation you would be dead already not because the ladies now are lazy but their entitlement mentality had eroded them of any natural thinking sense.

i recently had a discussion with a friend of mine whose wife told him she wants their son to go corona, this is a 2 yr boy just starting school and the following month she moved close to him again and asked they are due a second child with the first already 2ys not facturing in that her husband take home is 170k monthly and with corona plans and second child she said she felt he was relaxed and need to either seek better package or start looking for another job somewhere else, if semi-literates women of the 80s and 90s believed in building homes very well and assisting financially, what has happened to the well studied and well achieving women of this generation

i once had a friend who told me her dad never asked for once what the moms salary was and she worked part-time, he was wealthy and provided for the home, but guess what what she didnt tell me then which i obviously knew was the man now bless him has been down with stroke for 6-7 yrs, he;s just 62 and her mom just above 50s now works so tirelessly now she comes in 9-10pm every evening, why did he take the man sickness for her to take the initiative.

[b]i happened to mediate in an isuue regarding my friend here in the UK and his wife regarding finances, i sat down and listened to him and actually felt from his views, he came in to study and had a girlfriend at home for 2ys, when the waiting was becoming unbearable it resulted into insults, curses, time waster blah blah, he did the needful, told me he spent over a million, brought her to UK, got a bigger accomodation, she got pregnant and gave birth, of course he was happy doing all that, not complaining, the boy is 10 months now, he did all this through 2 jobs, macdonalds and a cleaning job, this is a project management graduate, the wife statrted a nursing cert, got a papers and got a job, he said he decided to observe her and see what she would do, he would come back from night shift, drop her at work and sit with the boy at home, after 4 months he said he noticed she was spending on clothings and shoes, sending money to her parents and siblings, not once did she ask if shoulc assist with feeding or any other thing, after 4 months he got annoyed, seized her debit card where she gets wages and send i dont care what anyone will say, you are self centred and from today i would mange whatever comes into this acct, while i know he took it too far, i understood where he was coming from.[/b]

in summary, the average salary in naija is between 150-250k, all expenses like schools, medicals, transport are not free, if any woman married to man within this band feels it is not compulsory for her to assist financially and only when she feels she need to that is when she should do and feels she would loose respect for such man and to her he is lazy, not good enough, why bother get married, why not wait till adenuga, dangote, otedola, shobanjos of this world come your way,to those that talked about 10yrs, 20yrs plan, there are 180 million pple in that country, a man would have what he feels is necessary to start a family, a good income not what would run the family forever, no wonder armed robbers are looking for preys, yahoo-boys gathering all the millions they need, civil servants and coperate guys forging and increasing deals, politicians milking the people of the money needed for the populace these are the "REAL MEN", in a country where the middle class hardly exists, a woman does not feel it compulsory to assist financially, and you wonder why we are country of rogues. i'm out

I wish there was a "love" button for this. Young women these days are lazy ass bitches wanting to do brazillian hair, and fix nails everyday not willing to contribute to this. It is down right disgusting. Well done to them sha, they shd marry and think the marriage will last.

kpolli: Is ur wife igbo? if she is, that explains it. . . . They are brought up with that mentality. . . A man provides 100%

Please do not generalise. I am Igbo and such nonsense is not taught. Infact Igbo women are very industrious.

[quote author=sunky-show]THANKS TO ALL DAT HAVE RESPONDED.

PLEASE, MY wife agrues dat am not man enough to take care of my responsibility thats y i tried to share d financial responsibilities, she believes women should ONLY CONTRIBUTE IF THEY FEELS LIKE,VOLUNTARILY, BUT NOT MANDATORY!. (because she's an igbo and they believe d man should do all financial burdens).

I STILL DONT KNW HOW TO MAKE HER REALISE THIS POINT, THOUGH SHE's DOING HER MASTERs RITE NOW,
PLEASE IF ANYONE KNOWS ANY MARIAGE COUNSELLOR TO SPEAK TO
i wil apreciate.
I STIL WELCOME MORE ADVISE FROM YOU ALL[/quote]I dont understand some women. I'm an Igbo lady, married to am Igbo man and we share financial responsibility. I don't expect him to pay for everything, it's demeaning. I work and I can contribute to the home so why shd i rely on him 100%. If something happens to him how will I cope? You need to let her know you cannot carry thee burden on your own or she will come home and hear you've been arrested for 419 or armed robbery. I know a lot of ladies think the man shd shoulder it all, but that is what leads to disrespect, beating and cheating from the man. And what is her reason for working then? Weird!

joeydozzy: she should have put the icing on the cake by putting the guy's pic

Abi ooo!

[quote author=Mynd_44]I have always thought noting could shock me again but this just reminds me that I am human[/quote]Having a spare tyre doesn't mean I was F***king him. He was just a toaster that I knew I could always date if my boyfriend(now husband) ever tried anything (cheating, feeling like he was my all). You know you guys can act funny when you think a girl is crazy about you.

White007: Really?
And now that you are married nko, you still keep ur spare tyre?

No I don't need one any more.

Good news for the manufacturing industry in Aba and in Nigeria as a whole. Cost of production needs to go down.

I had a spare tyre till the day I got married.

Richfella: Laugh wan tear my belle o .

Dangote...are you sure some people are qualified to drive your trucks .

abi o!

The only TV stations I let my kids watch is Disney Junior and it is limited to a maximum of 2 hours. He can watch Mickey Mouse, Lazytown, The Hive, Jungle Junction. No violence, no romance. After that it time to color, do puzzles and trace by numbers. Try not to let them watch too much tv.

only one? He bites his nails. I don talk tire. He slouches when sitting and it irks me.

bymigokeph: shun dis tori! naija dey speak french, hw she manage write d book in french. bad bele go b bad bele. afta polishing her. dose she look like an enslaved. Naija every body 1 make am fast. if am lying den make d book b free so d poor & co-enslaved can afford.
Soon na election she go 1t contest 4 Naija in name of i was enslved in france so VOTE TO STOP MODEN SLAVERY. USE UR HEAD OOOOOOOOO. NO DIS IS NAIJA NOT FRN

May your children be victims of sexual abuse from childhood to old age.

I'm igbo from Anambra state and dt is pure rubbish. Its all on ur husband. Even if its their tradition, he can stand for u and say no way. I guess he wants to humiliate you. Are u sure he even loves you?

My own opinion is, cheating is what you do and not want your significant other to find out. It is also what you do not want him or her to do to you. If you know your man, won't mind u flirting, go ahead! But if its something you can't do in front of him, its cheating!