₦airaland Forum

It could work out, as long as the couple in question:

~ Are in agreement / on the same page

~ Decide what their priorities are i.e. Career vs kids, etc.

I know a lady at work, not married, no kids, but has a partner.

My guess is they value companionship and their respective careers over marriage and kids.

aforti:
The virtuous man is not defined by the size of his sex organ, or his bedmatics, he does what ever makes or keeps his wife happy which is more important to him. Well it's not easy to find this virtuous man just as bits not easy to find a virtuous woman. Coz every body is busy getting mastery on how to use their sex organs and have lost focus on the things that really matter.

You don't get it.

Your definitions of the "virtuous" man lean towards the antics of a frenzied, religious fanatic - many of whom view sex as a necessary evil for strictly procreation purposes, hence my comments likening him to a having an inflexible (a.k.a headmaster like) approach to sex on an even stricter timetable.

Is virtue the exclusive preserve of the religious??

BluStreak:
No doubt on the issue of men being the determinant as they carry the Y chromosomes that yields baby boys. You also might have the need to further your knowledge on the part played by a woman's PH level at the time of copulation and conception.

That there is the baabaa of them all.

Even so.

You still haven't answered my question. How do you propose she she "supports" him?

5minsmadness:

I know what u r going to say

But honestly those were the days when songs made sense!
I'm an unashamed fan of Evi Edna!

Old boi

Oya, scouring sponge, Vim and Omo should do the trick - otherwise you ain't ma friend no more. Chei!!

5minsmadness:
Jealousy...
Jealousy...
Jealousy... Is the root of hatred
Happy sunday!

Haha!!

You dig Evi Edna's 80's song??

BluStreak:
This issue is a very sensitive one and begs for all understanding. The women of the days before supported their husbands when faced with this type of predicament, but today's women see it as a man being inconsiderate. This is Africa & we as Africans have some things that are peculiar to us. Unlike the West, having a male child who will take over the mantle from him forms among others the top desires of every man.

So support ur hubby on his desire to have a male child. Surrogacy is gaining ground now in Naija, or let him do the baby mama thinz. I won't support a new wife to avoid rivalry in a home you built over the years.

This is entirely my opinion which is my right whether it makes sense or not.

Support him how, exactly?

You do understand that the sex of the child is determined by the male's mismatched XY chromosomes and not the female's matched XX chromosomes?? i.e. The man's Y chromosome yields forth the male child?

Biology 101.

ahnie:
Sometimes whenever he's around,and his ears itching for gists,he'll be like..annie how z yur mum nah?...me...oh mum z fyne,she sent her regards...or how z bishop yur broda..?me...bishop z dooing great,he also sent his regards,when my guy could no longer bear it,he 'l restrategize,annie you know, you hav changed,and you no longer tell me secrets again,i'l response thus::::haaa mr ahlex,its the lords dooings oh,and its marvelous in my sight.case Closed op has to learn how to shut her loose.

Oniovo më, oboh weh gaga!!

#Nunu ra...Nunu ra...Nunu ra...#

This virtuous man sef - sounds like he'll be terribly boring in bed.

Strictly timetabled, headmaster-like, missionary sex. Experimentation = Cardinal sin.

Beautiful memories

Sigh...

The first part of the story was touching and on point.

The eulogy proceeding it was unnecessary.

Mpyaw:
My home is about to be shattered. Is it my fault that I couldn't give birth to a male child or am I God? My husband and I have been married for twelve years and we have four daughters. He doesn't really care about the sex of the children. He loves them and can spend his last kobo on them.
He is the first child and the only son of his family, in their clan their wives do give birth to a son as the firstborn, I'm the odd one out who has a daughter as the firstborn. My husband is not really bothered about that but his mother is on his neck to give her a son or marry another woman if I can't. My once loving mother-in-law now despise me like a flithy rag. The pressure is just too much and my husband has been forced to dance to their tune. He was on my side when all these started but now I'm alone in the battle.
I would have given child bearing another trial but my doctor warned me not to risk my life by getting pregnant again because I had my last two daughters through Caesarean Section and the last one was a little bit complicated, it was just God that saved me. I don't want to lose my man, my home to a strange woman out there. What do I do?

Mtcheeew.

Nigerians and their cooked up stories. Shebi as at 10th March you were a single guy looking to enter a relationship with a girl? https://www.nairaland.com/2982752/finding-cinderella

And barely a week later you're a woman with 4 daughters, married for 12 years.

What utter nonesense. Better post the link to this copy 'n paste story of yours.

Lol @ seasonal movies.

Nothing do the guy jare. Life isn't all about working yourself to the bone. There comes a point at one's life when the wheels of motion gradually begin to slow down.And if he really is in his 50's, the he's probably reached his peak.

The lady herself should go back to school - even if it's night school - to finish what her parents started. She's working, so she just has to find a way to keep pushing on.

It's never too late. Where there is life, there will always be hope.

Oh dear.

You must have lots of rats and cockroaches running amok in your kitchen...

Ishilove:
Yes you have. Op watchout, your deek is gonna turn green any moment from now




And fall off.

Pele o, dickless one

Lol!!!

I refuse to listen to Damiso

Chillisauce, nothing do you

Edwife...

Sarcasm aside, why would a young, able-bodied woman wait on a man to bring in the bacon?

How will complaining resolve anything?

Silly woman.

Chillisauce:
Congrats dear. Almost same date with my last. Is the date 27th?

They can share same cake.
Peppa pig cake I made

Lol! You try jor. Don't mind Eddy & Ify

ifyalways:
Wow. Thank God !!! Congratulations girl. Welldone.
Omugwo loading.

You still dey load?

Me don tie wrapper, carry my 1960's bag for hand dey waka dey go...

cococandy:
Efemenaxy
Chillisauce
Bukatyne
Babygirlfl
Edwife
Tearoses
Ifyalways
Byvan03
Onegai

Lil princess is here.
Thanks for all the support ladies.

Yayyyy!!!

Finally she arriveth!

Congratulations mami, and welcome to the world our little darling princess Coco!!

May our little darling be an everlasting source of joy to mum and dad. Well done Coco...

And Happy Birthday in arrears (sorry I missed that but better late than never, eh?)

Be sure to get plenty of rest dear- and congrats once again.

Fake story.

breadplanets:
The first time he called was a separate no. The message was a different no yesterday's call was a different no too. Ewuoo...

If it worries you that much, then hand the phone over to your husband.

Spank someone else's child?? And in public?? Men, if that happened over here, that bïtch will go down for it big time. What nonsense? Who is she? Irrespective of what the toddler might have done to her, she had no right! How dare she?

First of all, most Catholic Churches over here have got a mother & baby section / cry baby area for parents with little ones. This is to ensure such parents also have access to mass like everyone else while their noisy tots are kept away from disrupting the service.

Secondly, the ushers should have directed the parent(s) of the exuberant toddler to the baby room, or asked them to take their child outside till he'd calmed down. This is what the ignorant mother should have done in the first place. Or positioned him in such a way that he couldn't run off. When we go to mass, my then 3 year old daughter would do the same but her brothers always sat at the edge of the pew so she had little chance of escaping. I also used to strike a bargain with her, "mummy won't give you any money to put in the collection box if you don't sit still..." Used to work a treat - for 5 mins.

Alternatively, (if I don't forget while rushing to get to church on time), bringing along her colouring book and crayons keeps her distracted. And that's the key to keeping toddlers in check - distracting them. I soooooooo much dislike hearing NIGERIAN parents yell & scream blue murder at their little ones. Got one screaming her head off behind me, at her son a few days ago while I was out and about with my daughter and her older brother. So irritating. Couldn't seem to walk fast enough away from her yodelling. Smh.

Thirdly, there was absolutely no need for the defender to lash out at the child. A stern look followed by a "go back to your mum" should have done the trick. It has for me. And if that doesn't work, then she should have stood up, turned to the boys mother and in a very loud voice said, Excuse me, can you take your son away? He's being very disruptive over here!"

That should have done the trick. I.e publicly embarrass the silly mother AND get the sleeping ushers / church wardens' attention.

No pancakes for breakfast, that's for sure.

Then pick up baby for a wash. No, I'll probably trip over with her.

Will mop up better from the floor first then take little madam for a wash head-to-toe. Meaning I'll have to fix her hair again.

Block the number. And if he calls with a different number, block it again too.

In the meantime, alert a male member of your family to let them know what's happening so in case he calls you with another different number, hand your phone over to them.

That notwithstanding, make sure you don't give out any information such as your name, where you live, what church you attend, nothing.

The idiöt is fishing for info from you. Be smart and don't be a prey to his tactics.

Oyind17:
Now I know better, this is a Pastor speaking to men not my words sir/ma

Then that "pastor" of yours has got a hidden agenda.

Why use a derogatory phrase to describe a loving and caring husband?

Oyind17:
Nairalanders and their wahala

If I remember clearly, na you get wahala with how you brother chooses to run his matrimonial home.

What you need to understand Oyind17 is that where couples are concerned, what outsiders think of them is of little relevance to them especially if they're happy i.e: in this instance, a man and his wife.

There is no one-size-fits-all.

This story isn't new.

Anyway, in response to your questions @op, there is a distinct line between business and home affairs.

The lady is an astute business woman. If the man can't afford the rent, then he leaves.

Business is business. Keep sentiments aside. Or must she be short changed abi he wants to live there rent free?