₦airaland Forum

Why wont you find it difficult? When you came with a plan to rescue ur own tribe alone in multiethnics society instead of rescue naija as a whole.


I think bubu starts seeing sycophants in name of cabal forgetting him so soon.

Thazard:
Damn kind of bleeped up right now.

Nevertheless, I would share my story.


Here's the story.

Last year I was trekking back from work wearing my work clothes which were worn out and very dirty as i am a welder, humming some tunes to myself until I lifted my heads up and I saw this pretty girl standing by the roadside obviously waiting for a bike.

I said 'how far ' and walked past not expecting a reply from her due to my knowledge of how girls belittle Artisans. But shockingly she replied 'good morning sir'. I didn't stopped, I continued my walk.

I was interested in knowing her better that interested in my life better that I regretted never talking to her maybe i wouldn't be able to see her again. I daydream about that girl for a week or so until I went to work in the market and i saw her again.

I kept staring at her but it seems she was shy and didn't want to look at me so she stole glances at me. After that day, I didn't see her again till some weeks later. I was dressed in my work clothes being dirty on a bike going to where I am supposed to work.


I just passed where i saw her the first day and I heard 'Good Morning Sir' I looked back, she was the one and I waved. I had the intention of stopping the bike man so we could go towards the junction together but I looked at how dirty I was and the feature phone I was using which was tied up with rubber band so the battery wouldn't fall off.I had to drop that idea and regrettably continued my journey.


I didn't see her again until an unfortunate incident took me to the hospital for about 3 months. When i came back we crossed each other on bike and engage in a locked stare for some second till our respective bike zoom off. I didn't know if she remembers me or was still interested in me any longer so I wasn't forcing myself on her.

One day my friend came back from work and started talking about this nice girl he met at his work place and he was interested in her, felt happy for him until he showed me his her pictures and damn it was that girl I was crushing on. I acknowledge I knew her but didn't tell him she was the girl I was crushing on. I felt since I rarely see her and she and my friend work at the same place, he could have her. Although I didn't tell him that.


I tooked my mind off her. I went to another market with some other of my goons and I saw her again opposite where I was standing. She was staring at me and i was looking at her direction but pretended I didn't see her.

I didn't see her again for some time until my friend told me that she has started snubbing him(he was using good boy attitude to try date her which I had warned him against.) Since then, my interest in her sparked up again and I asked for her number which he gave to me. And here we are.
She's not replying to my message again.


Yesterday, I was strolling with my friend and he saw her exchange pleasantries with her
and I went to meet her, asked her if she knows who I was she said no which is a blantant lie. I told her I was the person writing her on WhatsApp she okay i am the guy chatting with her on WhatsApp. She was shy and I said 'yes, chat me up' as she didn't reply to my last message and I left.

My friend said i messed up because I was claiming dominance around her, I was commanding her to chat me up and she would never do that. I don't know but I kind regretted saying that


Please romance expert please tell me where did i get it wrong and what should I do?

You and ur friends that said you messed up still lack experience about women's relationship stuffs, when you grow older, you will understand better.


Meanwhile, nothing bad as you collected her number and chatted her up, (though not good in the sense that ur friend starts disturbing her already, if she knows two friends crushing on her, she might play two of you as she likes).


You see, wooing and dating girls/ladies/women has no methodology, what works for A, might not work for B.

I have slept with countless of such ladies that we started chatting on WhatsApp, though at first, they tried to intimidate, how I got their numbers, blablabla, but with consistency and manipulations skill, some fell for me eventually while some blocked me.


As a guy, dnt "fear or shy" to ask ladies out with any method u want. If she agrees, ur luck and if she turns u down, u move on.

If ur Atiku had allowed power to shift to the south, we would have forgotten APC by now.

You sweetly talking about Muslim-muslim, if Atiku had won, won't we be lamenting about Fulani-fulani 16 straight year by now?

Tinubu is only Muslim on paper but christian in soul, that is just truth of the matter.

Vinnie2000:
Can you expantiate on this Plz?🤔

BTW, I know you, to be a Tinubu/APC supporter.
Hunger has changed ur Political Party? 😏😒

Quote me where I supported Tinubu, make sure you dig well and see different posts I against Tinubu,Obi and Atiku.


I'm not blinded follower like you, who will never see anything good from Jerusalem.

Namaster:
It's madness that anyone will support the removal of fuel subsidy. It may be a good idea in other countries but this is Nigeria.

The people will suffer the consequences of the removal and enjoy none of the benefits. I spent more than 40K travelling to the east in the past 4 weeks.

@ ur bolded

That's most painful aspect of it.

In two years to come now, having realized nothing to show for masses ,they will come and be given various excuses why subsidy removal not working.

By them, it would be too late to reverse removal again.

Try to talk to single mothers in which husbands had abandoned with kids and see things urself .


For those who can dig anything under skirt, i think its windfall time.

Since he knows, so much more money available to loot in his fatherland, unlike international job, that he will be accountable for every penny he spends.

helinues:
Better.

FG can't be paying them while working for others.

Go and hire private security if you need one

Infact, it will also increase job opportunities in private security firm.

Nigeria govt doing everything for elite at expense of the masses

Myth, Deceit, Satanic manipulations and Fantasy , depend how it occurs to you.



Love with opposite gender has to do with body chemistry, if u nuture it, it will grow, and if u neglect it, it will die a natural cause.

More reason non blooded related opposite gender shouldn't try to be bestie, if they don't want to end the friendship with hot sex.

if u refuse to let go of love u had for your partner after demise. You alone would suffer emotional pains, believing myth or cultural beliefs, or soul mate.

Nonso92:
As the topic suggests, let's hear it.
Also, colleagues who had office romance with other colleagues, how is it going, how did it end?

Different ladies/girls u slept with in the past and present, how did it end?


The way u guys dignify supposed pleasure between mature man and woman is sickening.

Is it only woman that needs Marriage or delay in marriage?

scrupulousblog:
and they will be banging her behind your back

Keep on masturbating alone because ur mouth too blunt to ask small girl our.

Tell your friends to woo them for you, life not hard the way you guys handle it.

Everyone has his/her strength and weakness, if ur weakness is that ur mouth blunt before woman,some people are professional in that field.

Contact them to lift you from your dongeon.

juman:
Do you know a strategy used by ECOMOG in sierra leone against the rebel.
ECOMOG withdrew from some places and the rebels came out from the forest and took over those places.
Then ECOMOG attacked them voraciously, succumbed them and won.

Liken ordinary Liberia's rebles to Ukraine (NATO &US) say alot about Ur thinking!

Bye.

Klass99:
Fiscus abeg no dey follow me talk with shorthand it gives me a nasty headache. If you are going to engage me please write in proper English. Meaning no offence to though.

Two married women close to me were miserable and unhappy for a long time because they gave up their means of livelihood in upwardly mobile cities to join their husbands in backwards and under developed cities that didn't offer much in terms of economic enterprise or work opportunities. One of them was able to remedy her situation via a good job in Abuja and she said that was her saving grace from intense depression.

You people have sold women a pipe dream that without marriage and kids, they will be forever doomed with a life of misery. So most give up good jobs, their financial security, single lives they were reasonably comfortable and happy with for the sake of these things.

Only to encounter massive misery, depression and unhappiness in their very Nigerian marriages where Naija men believe they can behave any how and the woman will not leave for the fear of divorce stigma or because of the children.

I believe you have also seen numerous threads authored by married women who complain of husbands that don't provide, repeatedly slacking off their responsibilities or gambling away their income. The latest story now is of the one who wants his wife/two kids to relocate to the village.

I have worked in the private sector since leaving school and I laugh every time people claim there is job security in the private sector or private sector jobs don't pay well like federal government jobs. The OP said she just got a good job, with pay increase and nice benefits too......Let her make the most of it and enjoy it before throwing it away on the altar of marriage, don't use menopause to scare her.

In present day Naija I won't even counsel any woman to give up her financial security for the sake of marriage, if they are not marrying capable men like Tony Elumelu or Jim Ovia ( I am just kidding, but I hope you catch the drift). Unlike you, I think a good job will benefit a woman, more than a Nigerian marriage as we know it in Naija.

I will be very surprised if u re not single mother and if u re still married, I salute ur husband who housed embittered species.

You re only given sermon to demonlise me and pushing me towards what I didn't say nor my intention.

I think you should concentrate about OP's scenario and not Okonjo iweala or Obi Ezekwesilie among others.

The girl we are talking about, is not working in CBN nor NNPC not even govt sch but private that littered every clan in Nigeria.


I will advice u not to give advise base on ur own interests and fancies, perhaps, bitter experience.

The lady in her statement, u can read that, she would be the one who would like to be with her love and not a fan of feminist as u be.

What stops a lady working in private school to leave and move with her husband, private school she can easily get in Kwara, even if it's lower income. With that, it a win-win situation.

Did u also imagine that if she fails to marry this time around, she may miss for life?

Did u know what it means to be without husband and childless?

Madam in life, it's about compromise o. If u want to have it all, U may end up loosing it all .


If ur Marriage is bitter, it doesn't mean some wives are not enjoy their marriages maximally ok.

Nazgul:
It's not the 100th time he has beaten you and you're still in his house. It's like that girl is tired of life and is looking for someone who would send her to the great beyond.

That's is to tell u that woman mouth tooo.

U know woman always play victim.

In as much I detest abuse in any form, atimes we let the sleeping dog Lies!

If u find out now,the wife abused the husband verbally before husband abused her physically.

Yemialade:
My name is Juliet and live in Ibadan
I met my boyfriend in Ibadan last year December when he came for business in my town.
We started dating and we are now planning for marriage .
I work as a teacher in a big school in Ibadan ,I just got the job after working in all this small small school .
My boyfriend is a construction manager and he has his own side business also.
So as we are planning I told my boyfriend I will move to kwara and leave my job when we get married o.
He was like I can keep my job if I like it cause I told him how I feel concerning that I just gotten the job which has huge benefit and salary increasement as I will be given promotion too.
So I was like how will I be doing it
He agreed for me to keep the job and we plan that I will be travelling twice in a month to kwara to see my husband.
But this is hard ,it is easy for men to be doing this but it is not for women.
Will this long distance marriage thing destroy my marriage as I will be a travelling wife ,what if temptation came to place for my husband when am not around just because of my job
I want to be there for my family .
What should I do in this kind of situation

My advise.

Tactically and if possible spiritually find out if.

1. Ur guy is a good man.

2. Know his goals
3 Does he align with ur goal?
4. Does he give generously towards his family affair? (ie. preparation towards wedding, how has he contributing? wen u ask him for things, (money, advice, prayers etc) what are responses.


If u can score him 60%, I will advice you to move in with him , immediately after wedding.

Private school is not one of jobs that should prevent u not to move in with ur hubby biko.

Thousand of private schools that u can work with in anywhere u find urself, remember urs is to compliment and not main financer.

Klass99:
At the mention of Ibadan and long distance marriage I remembered a work/business associate of ours in another organisation who died in a car crash on his way to Ibadan to visit his family from Lagos.

This happened in the early days of Goodluck Jonathan's rule, when our security crises wasn't this bad and travelling by road wasn't a high risk venture. In recent times where you have to worry about kidnappers, in addition to other road hazards, I am not a fan of this kind of marriage.

In the light of what I've said it is not easy for any gender to be doing interstate travel by road. Your options;

1. Quit your job and move to Kwara after the wedding, then start a job search while there.
2. Hold off on marriage plans for now and start a job search in Kwara schools, while you continue working in Ibadan. Marry after securing a job in Kwara.
3. Forget marriage for now and focus on enjoying your new job and the perks that come with it, for another year or two before talking marriage.

If I were you I will do option three because I cherish my financial well being, over and above an uncertain future, like what option one presents.

I biliv u read that the new school is a private school? And in private, no job security? You also aware that several ladies grow old without life partners in their lifetime?


Perhaps aunt age is thickening on secondly basis towards menopause.

NB. Working in private school is also uncertainty future as well, infact, it's even worse than Marriage uncertainty.

Result of being a hard guy.

When in actual sense, big and hard guys are the one in oil companies,CBN among others and not jobless mofo.

nairalanda1:
If we kept the subsidy, by the time subsidy costs grow greater than our earned revenue, there would be no money left over for anything...legal or illegal.

The honest truth is that we don't even have enough money for nothing right now.

Below...how subsidy affects our revenue. The times subsidy money fell was when fuel prices were raised, reducing subsidy costs.

Did u read the post and correlate it with ur responses.

U said we dnt have nothing, yet govt officials still leaving large.

Political salaries want increased by 114%

We just start ooo, for those that single praising Tinubu on everything he is doing, they will come weep after six months.

Subsidy gone
Tutution fees removed
Taxes raised
Electricity tariff raised.
Exchange rate vanished

All these severe austerity measures at a go!

Yet govt has not for once anounced austerity measure on their own part.

By now, they supposed to have brought Oransaye's report out and be merging govt agencies.

Telling the whole world how they want to cut lavish spendings in govt.

Reducing political appointment drastically.

U said govt dnt have money, yet

#5billion naira of taxpayers money enter his pocket every month.

His daughter raking money in the market.

His son draining money, but for the masses leaving them to suffer.


I think austerity measure should cut across, infact, start from govt.



Yet blinded followers keep tongue praising and saying nonsense on the internet.

Hamachi:
From DM

Don't u do courtship?

If it's wife doing gragra, it's husband that would cut her wings.

If it's mother interfering more than normal, it's job of husband to cut her excessive.

If it's wife's mother going gaga, it's the job of wife reduce it.

Meanwhile, if it's husband, father in law, mother in law or any of his older siblings.


Everyone has his or her job descriptionscription in marriage.

talented321:
To the men, who will you buy or build house for among your wife and mother first, if you have the finance to build one house. And remember both of them don't have a house. Pls i need opinions.

Stupid question, read what you posted yourself, no wonder u guys find it difficult to marry.

When all ur opinions are childish and foolish.

Pauldollars:
Let's ask ourselves...could Peter Obi have been able to do what President Bola Ahmed Tinubu has done within 2 weeks in making significant changes in all the security architecture of Nigeria?

What is difficult in changing security architecture? Just to order and everyone obeys!


For EFCC & EMEFIELE, he won't have touched them, knowing fully they helped him decimated TINUBU and ATIKU who have trillion of naira to buy votes. (That would be his taught)

Flows001:
Moderators please push this to front page.

My first post on nairaland, so please pardon any error.

Good morning everyone, so let me just go straight to the point.

My elder sister has been dating this guy for more than a year now, she became pregnant months into the relationship and he begged her to keep the child, that he was going to marry her.
So she did and about two months ago, she gave birth to a boy.
Just like he said, he started making moves to marry her, she took him to see my uncle (because our dad is late), alongside with one of his brothers, they also went to see some of my aunties; as well as my Mum. So basically everyone knows them together in our extended family, as well as the street where my sister stays (she resides in Enugu State), because he usually goes to spend time with her and I must admit that he has been really nice to her and made sure she has been comfortable and never lacked anything.
Along the line, my sister started suspecting that this her husband to be has been avoiding picking up strange numbers calling him, she asked him but he told her not to worry.
Fast forward to earlier this week, she stumbled upon a text he received from one unsaved number, the text was begging him to allow the sender to atleast come visit him, apparently; this same guy was already married before and already had two grown children before he left the marriage for reasons which she didn't tell me, so his children have been making efforts to reach their father as their mother went to dump them with his brothers and went her way..

When my sister confronted him, he had to open up to her and apologised, stating that he wanted to start another life and couldn't tell her from the beginning because he didn't want to lose her..

Now my sister is in a dilemma, their traditional marriage was scheduled to hold by the end of this year and he has already started making efforts to officially pay her bride price.
Her two options are:
1. Leave him and become a single mother at this young age (she's a student of NOUN and does business which he supported her to expand).
2. Stay with him and accommodate the children from his former wife.

Please advice 🙏🙏🙏

Where is dilemma? I even tot the husband still married to his first baby mama, she should even been happy that the guy wants to formalize the Marriage.


Tell ur sister to continuing the preparation and be praying towards successfully Marriage biko.

I think it's even good that everything revealed before marriage proper.

Angelfrost:
It will be much worse...! You don't know Nigerians!

You that is not civil servant, u already adjusted prices of ur business/work upward with current inflation. No be so?

For civil servant that receiving 100k , in which he usually used 20k for transport a month before subsidy removal.... how will he survive now that transport cost goes up to 70k a month?


Before you talk, make sure u put urself in one shoe ok.

franchasofficia:
The person you quoted is correct, in Nigerian security setting, the two major security heads that controls Nigeria's security are; Police IG and Chief of Army Staff......the next are DSS and EFCC.


But to be honest, majority of Igbos are happy with Tinubu's appointments so far, we don't care if Tinubu appoints only Yorubas, so long as he is not giving key security heads to Northern Jihadists, we are cool.....we are comfortable with Yorubas or Southsouth or Middlebelt being in charge of key security agencies in Nigeria but not some Northern Jihadists masquerading as Security Chiefs to destroy Nigeria's peace.

Is what u are quoting same with we are saying?

Go back and re-read it. He talks about custodian of weaponry and not security heads.

damble:
More than this

So they will impose several economy austerities, without palliative to cushion the effects?


Has govt announced their own austerity measure too?

The money they want to save from subsidy, won't it go to pockets of political class ultimately?


Have u read that,
School fees will now go up?
Additional taxes on everything?
Electricity tariff increases among others?

All painful economy policies at a goal.


Anyway you guys (citizens) have been leaving like conquered long ago Sha.

SmartPolician:
When they increase the salaries of federal workers, inflation will increase.

Is inflation not increased now?

smsinnigeria:
Only 2 security agencies are visible and have more control over Nigeria weaponry. They are the Army and police and control of the two went to south West. Tinubu is preparing for war. You appointed a Southeasterner Naval chief where there's no warship.
Main this recruitment get as ebi.

So, chief of naval staff doest have control of fighter jets?

Chief of naval staff doest have control of warship? Perhaps super Tucano jet no longer weapon in Igbo dictionary.

Dude stop embracing urself because u want to score cheap bigotry point.