₦airaland Forum

Onetenth:
how much do u suggest

It's not easy to save money these days and for you to achieve that, you must be very economical with every penny in your hand

Discipline is the way out to save money now, especially as naira has no value

Start by getting a piggy bank and start saving

I think 1k is enough for you to start with and watch after one month, if you should reduce it to 500, maintain the 1k or increase to 1500

VeryWickedMan:
You make between N150-250k monthly and you can't save.


The problem here is that you have refused to pay your dues. If you like open 12 kolos, you will still not have two pennies to rub together, trust me.

Every Nigerian transporter knows that in order to succeed in that field you must shed blood or else you will continue to toil in vain. Your bike has not tasted blood yet.

Why do you think Dangote trucks deliberately crush people to death all the time? You think say na play??


Start paying your dues and see the difference.

Who did this to you

Why are you talking nonsense in the name of shedding blood before making fortunes

You are a very bad adviser

Barrister026:
Hello all,

This is difficult situation for me, my mom's house has been left uncompleted since 2014 just the foundation and probably 2couch were placed ontop since then it's been there because she had to send my siblings and I to higher institution. Now am of age, doing quite well for myself. I think am finally ready to build a house, was thinking about getting a land 100 by 50 and raise 5 bedroom flats... but on the other hand that my mom's building had been left uncompleted since it's a family land, relatives are starting to say somethings and sometimes I could see the shame on my mom's face when she goes to her family compound. Almost every months they always call her to come clear it that it has become harbor for snakes and pests. So I thought why don't I just complete it for her first.


The issue here Is immediately I told my fiancee she said it's a good idea but kicked against it. That I should build mine first, before completing my mom's. That it can wait.

I also confided in a friend of mine, he said almost same thing, that my thing is different from our own. Saying am not the only one my mom gave birth to, if I complete it now I should be ready to share it with my siblings no matter what when the time comes.

I'm confused and need advice on the step to take. I would really want to complete that house for my mom I Know it would mean a lot to her..I'm really confused.

One way or the other somebody has to develop it, if I the first son don't do it now that am financially stable. Then my younger bro will do it, trust me it won't make sense that way that's just my fear.

Seun
Lalasticlala
Mynd44
Ishilove

Family house belongs to all not who did the foundation and who built it, so far it's in the family house

You should have built yours with out announcing it to the family and no one will know after that then build for your mum by completing the house, if you know that you have the money

Alternatively, discus with your mum, the the idea of getting a developer to build the house and they will do the needful to perfect the agreement that goes with it

But if you know that you are financially buoyant finish your mum house and remove any claims there because it's not your own but family house

Then start your own

Ajokol:
Please I need honest advice from matured and married people here, I have been married for two years, I didn't date my wife. I met her in the village and we got talking, we were both in our late thirties and got married after three months, my wife is not ugly and I won't say she is beautiful, she is just a normal woman. She does her wifey duties and she has good character. The issue is, I am not sexually attracted to her, we don't flow emotionally, we don't flow on gisting level, our level of exposure differ.
We only have sex to get her pregnant, we don't have kids yet, am not happy. How can I handle this?

You have to accept what you have because you made the choice and went ahead with it, even when you know vividly that there is no affection between both of you, in fact there was no connection or link while even the marriage was been planned

You have lived in the city where you had girl friends that spiced your life and you had good times with them

But when it was time to settle down you went to the village because those city girls are not just good enough

You can adjust your taste and choices for you to deal with this unpleasant situations

Teach her how you want her to be, engage her in to discussions that are more about social life

Relax and be patient for her to become pregnant that's if your sperm counts are perfect

Take her to yaba market you will get nice dresses and Jeans trousers that will make her look realy casual and nice looking too

Give her money to go to salon and make good hair once a month

Speak more of English than your local dialect

What I mean by above comments is that,
You should brush her up so that she can be upgraded

Get her a job so far she will be living the house in the morning to come back in the evening

She will see her mates and she will also learn few things

Just guide her

If you don't follow this simple ideas

You will end up n the hands of those city girls you dropped just because you want to marry from the village and once they realize that you are not enjoying your marriage, she will take over and give you the vibes that will spice your life up

Namiji4319:
I am not that bad, the truth is sometimes one woman might not be okay for a man

Look at the kind of life and life style you choose as a youth

You have decided to gamble with your life

Your case is like a fool that decides to swim in a Lagoon with out a life jacket

It's obvious that you are from a rusted home with no home training at all

Na you go suffer am, e remain small

APC2:
I created this new account to hide my identity.

We live in a highbrow area in Ogun state with one Kid of 2 years. My wife is not working, she is attending a university in Ogun state where we lived. My wife always watch African Magic, Zee World or running from one prayer house to another. She does not respect me at all. Living with her for 3 years now is hell on earth.

Yesterday, she told me that she attended a program conducted by a prayer ministry and the the General Overseer, a woman told her to bring a bag of rice as a seed. I told her I don't have money to buy a bag of rice for a ministry I don't know anything about. She got angry and told me that I must give her the money before I go to work. To my greatest surprise, she block the door and told me that I am not going anywhere until I give her the money for the bag of rice that the woman of God need the rice that yesterday. I got angry and tried to push her, she gave me a heavy slap and began to shout and insulting me using English so that every neighbour will hear. I was so ashamed and forced my myself out of the flat, she ran after me, held my clothe and tear it down.

I return back to my flat, carry a cable wire and beat her until she couldn't stand up. I'm an operation manager in my company, I went to work, took excuse and went to police station. I carried two police to arrest the general overseer, when we got there, she started swearing that she did not tell my wife to bring any rice, that it is my wife that volunteer to bring. The police did not arrest her again. I returned to office and notify her parents.

Her parents came in the night and after I explained to them, they insulted their daughter and apologize to me. I told my wife to follow her parents she refused.

So about 12:00 midnight, my wife started again, threatening me that she will deal with me, talking loudly again that I called her parents to come and insult her and she will pay me back in a way that I will regret knowing her.

When I couldn't sleep, I went out of the house at about 2:00AM to look for a near-by hotel to sleep. Immediately I entered the hotel, a young lady standing in front of the hotel followed me to the reception. I was thinking she want to book a room as well. The receptionist told me that the available room is 17, 000. I accepted and paid. I was directed to the room and as I entered, somebody knocked the door. I open the door and it was the young lady that followed me to the reception when I was entering the hotel. Before I knew she entered the room and said, "oga, I will do you well, na just 4,000 you go give me". She started touching me and I told her to stop it. I was so disturb by wife problems and I needed someone to talk with. So I accepted the lady. We spent the night together and had sex twice. This is my first time of having sex with another woman since I married in 2019.

I am always at home with my family when I return from work and I think my wife is taking that for granted. I will be going out from now to meet other women. I am completely tired of the marriage and I am considering marrying another wife that can give me peace and respect.

What an embarrassing situation you went through

Well since her parents condemned her actions, they already know that she has madness and there is nothing they can do about her mad character

As it is now, consider yourself as a man that doesn't have a woman because her threat can be graveous

Goring after women for now is not what you need

If your job is transferrable to another state, then discuss with your HRM and get a transfer

If not then make move to get another apart then take your belongings and leave that house for her, tell the landlord that you are done with the tenancy and advise the landlord to put up a quit notice, so when the rent expires she will find her way

Secondly when you get a new apartment, try and relax first and see if you really need a woman now or later

But the most important thing is that you are not leaving with her for her to carry out any harm on you

Be determined not to accept her back because it could be the final journey to terminate you

OhBritannia:
Let me give guys a life advise.
No matter what you do in life, try your best and make peace with all women, especially the ones you have or had sexual relationship with.
( Only the wise will understand)

Honestly I agree with you,

Is better to make enemity with men than with women

Men do reconcile casually and still dine with you

But you see the other gender, just avoid anything that will lead to quarrel

They can make or mar a man's progress

Gracia12:
Good day Ma. I sent you a pm

Good day, I don't accept such

GlorifiedTunde:
Hmmm.... can we skip the prenatal and antenatal care ma'am.

I would like to focus on the specific baby needs. How expensive in your calculations?

My time is not your time because of the cost of baby items

But why do you want to start from petty things like baby stuff

Is that the only place you have issues with trying to go into family way

toujurs:
Who br this idiot, this one no get sense at all. A woman that rely on a man to provide for her, is what you call smart, You are a mumu man.

After being trained in school, they still come out to wish for a rich husband, Are u kidding me , Calling them smart. Guy chill o. Imagine ladies never had a kitten, Omo na suffer o. Bitter suffering.

Go to instagram and see how these women sexualize themselves, after they would come out to scream how men only see them as a sex object.

You obviously did not understand what he meant
Don't worry when you get married, just one month you will understand very very well

thorpido:
Always try to comprehend a story so you can merge a response to the body of the story.
The topic says,'how prison saved me from committing suicide'.

My response below is what I replied someone who made a comment similar to yours.


Comprends-tu?

ok

thorpido:
Good for her.

What's your problem

Do you wish yourself such punishment

Haven't you ever helped someone that almost put you into trouble

Finestgal:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VRvPeXiL5sA

Nkechi blessings fires at her ex for saying that she wear one pant for 3 days that she hasnt wore pant since 18 and she don't wear pad she use cotton wool for her period.

https://www.facebook.com/100008255917599/videos/5031361783585123/?app=fbl

What's the problem if a lady uses cotton wool or tampons for period, its even the best of them all

Kelechi009:
No mind the mumu, na him own dream be that

Exactly ❗

walkbrazil4k:
Is this every woman's dream? I am surprised I see alot of women saying, No, so I don't understand what women want, lol

How can this even be someone's dream.?

sparko1:
Not exactly, let me ask you.

If a man marry's a single mom, and he expect they will go for honey moon, will she go with the child or not, do you expect her to leave the child with her parent and go with you to North Korea to have sex she have been having for over 10 years.

Let say she agrees to leave the child, do you think she will be comfortable without hearing from the child in a day (she can't really be with you, no matter how much she pretend), every call she receive, she want to know the thing going on with her child, the experience is not the same, that time is suppose to be for just both of you, but, now its 3 of you and there is nothing you can do about it.

Then come the choice that is usually associated with having a child, or do you think every man wants a child? No! but if you marry a single mom, the choice is not yours to make, and the experience of having to decide is all that matters.

Do you know why if a woman cheat, men won't forgive, because, a woman don't have sex for fun, a woman is incapable of loving more than one person at a time, if she love her son, (which is of course the case, not a problem) but what are you to her, a provider, the bitter pile that we need but can't swallow, the piece that doesn't fit, you will always compete for her love.

Now move to you having your own family, some women won't want to have another child because of the experience from the previous relationships, they will just say, this one is enough, but what about the man, the man that want to have a family, trust me, until you reach that bridge, you can't understand the difficulty in crossing it.

Then come the ferminist path, most single mothers have developed so much hatred because of the father of their child, every man is a Devil, the man keep trying and eventually, even the strongest of us give up and give in, when you discover that it doesn't matter what you do, it will never be enough, then why try.

There's is a lot to consider, I just don't have the time to put them up.

If you are impotent, Wil you want to marry a single mother for you to have feelings of being an adopted father

Or you will want to marry a single lady and you with your family will acuse her of not being pregnant, but you are the one that has issues

Will you tell your family to leave her alone and stop asking her of not being pregnant

Or you will openly tell your family that it's your fault

Parents still leave their children with their grand parents for vacation

UncleKoboko:
This is where your sense should tell you that MEN AND WOMEN CAN NEVER BE THE SAME.

WE ARE NOT EQUAL AND WILL NEVER BE EQUAL FOREVER NO MATTER HOW SENSELESS FEMINISTS AND SOCIETY TRIES TO EVEN FORCE IT.

KNOW THIS AND KNOW PEACE.

DON'T COMPETE, WE ARE HERE TO COMPLEMENT EACHOTHER AND NOT TO COMPETE FOR EQUALITY.


You dey see Nerd nwoke? You see the late aalafin of Ọyọ? Etc

You sound arrogant, no wonder you are called uncle koboko

6pack:
I know this might sound too good to be true but I make 2million naira monthly but I have the most bleeped up life. I don't have a house , I don't have a good car, not married and no kid. Always in one form of trouble or the other. Sometimes I wonder if I am jinxed or cursed. Someone said I should look for a good lady and settle down but with the way u see naija girls act and behave, I don't see myself doing that soon.
Well let me end the rant here. I have a serious wahala I need to settle maybe after that I will look for a fat yansh girl marry and see if my life takes proper form

You are not serious, you never see anything yet

lovehelp:
Please kindly advise:

I am having a friend that I have brought the idea of marriage to. I have not concluded with her on my marital decision because of some issues. One of the issue is that she is 22, while I am 35. She is tall and she works. That age difference is a concern to me.

Please kindly advise on this

So far she is not a minor

The most important thing you should be worried about is,

Is she matured enough to handle marriage and its crisis

Or you want a small girl that you can handle hoping that she won't give you problems

Anyway am sure she is not the only woman in your life

If you are have having doubts try another age range

6pack:
I broke up with my ex 3 months ago. I have not been able to get her out of my mind.
She moved on got dumped by the guy in less than one month and she contacted me 5 days ago and I responded today. I tried settling it out and she said I responded late. That it can't work now. She even said she was going to see another guy . Like wtf.
What type of useless mind game is this please.
The fact is I love her so much. She is not the type that is after money or material things.
And I don't believe in double dating. We have been moving alone for 5 years now. I don't know how to get her off my mind. I have watch countless YouTube videos on how to get an ex off your mind but non is working. I have tried having sex with different girls just to get her thoughts off but its not working. This thing is affecting my hustle seriously.
Damn , let me drink some beer.
Life has been unfair to me relationship wise

Your and your mind is playing game against you

Keep begging her to come back pregnant her so that she will stay with you

Mineisgrace:
why the anger

Honestly ❗

TheCongo2:
Please tell them ...

Lol

GlorifiedTunde:


Ok, I really want to have estimates though. If you can share.

If that is the case
Start from antenatal registration and maternity drugs and food with clothes of the mother to be

That's where to start from

Then calculate delivery fees be it natural birth and CS

You can get the above mentioned from the hospital

melonsgroup:
She will be like he's not rich but he's good in bed, what do I do? Should I stay with him because he's good in bed or should I break up with him because he's not rich.

A woman never get confused on what to do with a man that comes her way

A man can't be useless in all areas

If he is poor but romantic and good in bed

That's the best choice of man

I will still love him for his humility

It's now left for me to work harder to meet up while he assist the home front and do something to get a source of living and have sense of belongings

denobaba:
That is not true and you offer yourself cheaply as the greatest disclaimer to that position. Women pander to emotions, therefore are not equipped to lead. Any home without a father is mostly a reckless one. I'll forever put my faith in men to continue to lead civilization.

I never mentioned the neglect of father's at home neither do I compare the roles of both parents

Since you are finding it difficult to understand simple details

Am done with your arguments

sunnymighty:
Good morning all,
I am not the type that dwell on frivolities though, I live where I work,I mean a hostel facility.I am trying to correct a young man here that this type of lunch pack is not meant for the freezer. Moreso,we work with children and young adults disability and most are visual learners,IMO I feel it is not right and whatever is inside (It is padlocked) ;Dshould be removed wrapped in a nylon and can be freezed.Please correct me if I am wrong.

He did that to make him not to forget to pack the child lunch pack at school

So it's handy for him to pack them in the box bag and dump it in the freezer, so he can just pick it up and give to the owner

GlorifiedTunde:
Dear mothers of newborns (0-12 months),

What's the average (Monthly) cost of raising your babies in these current economy considering the following:

Clothing
Diapering
Feeding
Body care

etc

If you Take these into consideration you won't go the way of parenthood

That's why it goes with responsibilities

This is one of the reasons why they said a married man is a responsible man

TOMMYS:
Sowing seeds to get a better appointment in pdp when the north all vote for atiku

Till then

jendoslim:
Are you being serious about this ?

Prat tell, which stage will a man get to that he will be desirous of a single mother to marry??

Don't pray to get to that stage

ObamaMessi:
Na Frozen70 sent me.

Lol

denobaba:
Lols! I pray to God his father will be around in this critical phase of his life. Left to you, that boy child is in grave danger of misguidance.

Kai, children really need their fathers.

A mother is the real politician of every family

She knows what's good for the family

yuppyz:
Hello Everyone,

I really need your thought on this matter, especially from people who have had similar experience.

I'm married with two kids, one is 2yrs old and the second is about 7mths. I was planning on relocating with my family to the UK on student Visa. I have secured admission, just to pay deposit and apply for visa. Two of my friends that are in the UK already are suggesting that my wife should come as the student while I come as the dependant so I can get open work permit. But my wife is currently a nursing mum, and non of her doc are ready.

And, if she comes with me as a dependant, I don't know the possibility of her coping with work and two little kids while I'm a student with Just 20hr to work.

I'm thinking of going alone first, let me see go and survey the land while my wife stay back and still be managing our business. I am very skeptical about burning all my bridges here while going to a foreign land with wife and little kids.

My only concern is, I heard the UK go will not allow you to bring your family if you have less than 6 months to the end of your studies.

Lastly I do not want to stay so long and faraway from my family.

Kindly advise

Take your family along if you know you can't cope staying far from them

When you get there, you will know how to navigate things

What you should be worried about is flight tickets money and accommodation

If that is sorted out then go with them

Risk is part of a man's life