₦airaland Forum

Axzobr:
I have observed some thing not good about myself. Which is affecting my relationship with people.

I talk too much even tho I I am an introvert.

The excitement of talking when there's the slightest opportunity to speak with some makes me lose guard and start saying things I ought not to say.

How do I control myself?

ObamaMessi:
Selling the land will require the man's signature too.It's not possible for her alone to sell the land.

Islandlady:
I felt really embarrassed and angry today for what a useless guy did, and it got me asking the above question!

I ran into a guy today that I know back at my former street today at a mall in Abuja, so we greeted and actually sat down to gist for a while before going our separate ways, after a while I noticed he wasn't comfortable, so he decided to excuse himself! Only for me to noticed he had an erection he was trying to hide away from me

Do men just get aroused by random things or random thoughts becos I still can't understand why he got an erection in such a public place! Or he is just being a pervert
Mynd44
Ishlove

ObamaMessi:
According to the story, they already have a land.But the man refused to build a house and chose to buy a car living in a renting house.

ObamaMessi:
A woman in the area where I recide reportedly divorced her husband for buying a car instead of building a house.It was said that the divorced husband failed to listen to the wife to build a house and bought a car with the money they both raised.

What is our society turning into?

LadiesForever Jeon

Danjuma827:
God will help men. Some women when they have tasted wealth, find it so hard to be submissive in their homes... 95% of marriages that the wife earns more than her husband always crash...
No matter how loyal your wife is... When she starts to earn more than you... That's when she'll start to misbehave...

Malory:
And what do you have to offer the broke man in return if he doesn't cheat you? Nothing except that smelly hole dripping blood

Miraclenoble:
yes mummy,only you fit do agitation for naija.

You really gave me hope and I would always remain grateful.God bless you

threegees:
You understand this situation.
He has gone this length before. He asked for divorce. Meeting was held in my father's house, and after I explained a little of what he did, the family begged.
I forgave and moved on.
We are here again. I need my sanity. That's the reason I want to move out quickly. I got a house but the money is not enough, and I still have daily expenses to do, with the kids especially.
I'm planning to move out in July, by God's grace, so that the school session can end for the children's sake.

threegees:
Good evening, all.
Please I'll like to know, (perhaps from people's experiences), how separation and custody of children work.

I'm planning separating from my husband. I'm taking the children along. I want to know if having custody of the children will be an issue. I'm a teacher. He doesn't work, and doesn't want to work. He doesn't provide for them, doesn't pay house rent, and he (and his family) sees nothing wrong with it. He is now verbally abusive, and I want to move before it gets physical. I'm tired of talking, quarrelling, fighting and begging from people to survive. I want to be mentally stable and continue catering for my children in peace.

Phargbemmy:
My wife picked up teaching job at a school where my three children attends and of recent I noticed something between herself and a male teacher there.

I accosted and accused her while she denied anything between them. I approached the said male teacher on Whatsapp after I noticed my wive spending more than extra time most night chatting with this same guy, he even called her some few minutes to 12midnight one day whilst we were on the bed together.

I told the guy to please stay away from my wife as I do not want issues, my heart did not "approve" of their friendship. Went ahead to let him know I will inform my father in-law if such continues and the guy had the audacity to tell me to go ahead and report her.

I warned my wife and she promised not to chat with him again.

Just 5 days ago I saw their chats again where the guy was asking her what my wife is doing now and she replied "chatting with you and playing with my phone'.


People help me as I have been wanting to divorce my wife as this isn't her first time but the dad will always plead for us not to agree to a broken home.

What do I do here?

Solacemk:
Hi Nairalanders. I need your help.

We are married for 8 months now but I'm starting to suspect her, it all started with calls she's making, though the contact name shows female name but she will move to the other room to receive the call, and sometimes she will not even receive when I'm around, i never asked her why but one day the phone was closed to me then a number called with a female name on it, she picked the call and started laughing then cut the phone she acted like it's her friend that called. Then after few minutes she moved to the other room and call the number again, after that i started having doubts, when she left the phone i picked it and open it because i know the password, i copied the number and checked it with Truecaller but the name that appears on it was male's name. Pls I'm really confused. Is she really cheating on me? Or it's just an error, should i proceed with the investigation or i should just leave it and forget about it. Please Brothers and sisters help me. I'm dying inside. I've never cheated on her since when we are dating. Please help a brother. Please jokers should keep off. Thank you all.

Nuelzi:
You are kindhearted...may God bless you

I wish him quick recovery

Hi, my name is Chioma(definitely not my real name). I created this account just to get some advice on how I feel about a certain married young man.
I'm 39, married with 3 kids? (a boy and 2 girls), I am the CSM of the oldest bank in Nigeria, with a branch in Port-Harcourt.
How did it start? In 2020, I crossed paths with a young guy from Akwa Ibom State (let's call him K), he is 33 yrs old, good-looking, and caring, he represents an organization that is affiliated with the Federal Government. The organization sends him and his team to come to pick cash from my branch for their operations every Sunday or Monday early morning, one thing lead to another and we exchanged contacts. We started chatting and it got to the point that if I don't see his "hi" or "bae"( he usually calls me", I'll be so uncomfortable that my whole night will be moody, sometimes if my husband is around and wants sex, I'll just lay like a wood till he is done and sleeps off.
Sometimes, when he comes on Sunday, I'll wear one of my most revealing clothes so I can get his attention, as it makes me feel like having him. In 2021 March to be precise, he broke my heart and got married, God so bless his wife doesn't reside in Port-Harcourt and only comes during holidays, we have been having a really good chat, sometimes December last year(2021), my husband traveled to the village with the kids and since I occupy an important part of the bank, I cannot just leave without someone responsible taking over. My husband nearly caught me one day when he called in the middle of the night on video, I had to switch off my phone and block him immediately, I'm not proud of what I'm doing, but it gives me thrills whenever I'm with him. He understands and my kids are so fond of him, that whenever they are around him, I just have this peace over me, as he has this eagle eye that watches over them.
Recently I lost my father and my in-law, who was staying with us, no amount of consolation was enough except from K, He came around for a condolence visit, and he took his time to tell me about life and death and his smooth tone, I just melted into his hands, I just had to respect myself as they were people around us. He checks up on my morning and evening, if I have not eaten all day, he just has a way of making food for me (he is a very good cook and he bakes too) and sending one of his boys to bring it, if he is not at home, he will order the foods from one of my favorites online food vendor. How do I get over this feeling, as it is killing me, should I divorce my husband, how about his wife, what will happen? You all are free to do insult me or say things that will hurt, but in all, I'll sieve and get appropriate recommendations.


cc: lalasti.clala, farano, Rocktation, please help me

Nuelzi:
Greetings,I have seen the OP on video call....he is genuine and seriously ill

BabaIbo:
Sure, I do and that is why I asked this question here...

Just exploring every option before finally taking the step.

Thank you!

etokhana:
https://twitter.com/LagosPoliceng/status/1522517163264729090?t=_7VeLHbvvjxVvT6l5362ng&s=19[/quote]Since he likes the profession, he should be enlisted into the Nigeria Army, then send him to Sambisa

BabaIbo:
Marriage they say is a beautiful thing but if you ask many men out there what marriage is to them or what marriage has brought to them or will they get married if they are given chances to rewind time, their responses will be in negative form or NO.

That same step(marriage) is the next step to be taken by me but I have one unanswered question. I am a young man in my 30s, currently free from any dating relationship and about to begin my search for a life partner, but I like being cleared/well-informed about something before going into it.

Pardon me for this long note I am about to dish out and the question I will be asking at the end.

For sometimes now, people around me have been telling me I am next in line to get married, some telling me to ensure I bring a responsible lady home and all that.
My mom do tell me she won't rush me to get married but as an observant person you will notice she really wants me to bring a woman(wife) home.

My dad told me sometimes ago that if I don't have a lady, that maybe they should search for a young good girl for me early next year.
My younger ones are expecting me to take that step so they can start planning on theirs and all that.

All these are for their own good or benefits, I am not saying they don't deserve it but I have been trying to get a tangible reason to get married i.e what is the SPECIAL thing(benefit) it will add to my life, I am the one getting married not them.
"Na me wan wear the shoe."

A bikeman, popularly known as Okadaman that do come to my place told me story about himself and big opportunities that marriage has made him miss.

In addition to his words and those I have heard from others, the fear of things going south, disappearance of peace of mind and all that are other factors.

Presumed(anticipated) benefits which are not as they are expected to be again are)

CHILDREN: Children can be gotten without marriage, for example: C. Ronaldo, Mikel, and others did that and they are doing well.

GOOD MEALS: Foods can be gotten from outside or prepared by the man or any other person that is not a wife for the man. Moreover, how many of them can cook well like our mothers? I'm a better cook than most ladies I have come across.

COMPANIONSHIP: That is an overstatement in our present society. It is even more noticeable in dating relationship than in some marriages these days.

SEX: That is the cheapest service/thing to get after air and water(clean water is even more expensive). Moreover many marriages are lacking sexually. It is worse if the man has high sex drive aka high libido.

SUPPORT: I don't want to go there because it is an open fact that instead of getting support, the man is being leached/milked of the one he has.

HOME: I can still remember how some married men will pack their cars at the junction, stay inside their cars for long before driving home, some go to the bar/relaxation centers to chill before going home, some don even like going home. You all know why?

With all these in mind, I want to ask this question that has been bothering me because I need to sort it before taking the step...

Now, my question is "WHAT IS THE BENEFIT OF MARRIAGE TO A MAN IN THIS OUR TIME?"

PS: I used this image because what marriage did to the man in the picture is in the open

Miraclenoble:
no ma,I have done just that,I couldn't get someone to help take the pictures this morning so I took it myself but I have asked someone to come help me out,hope this helps ma'am.

Aconcagua:
Hello esteemed Nairalanders in the property and other sections:

Please I need your informed suggestions on the best areas within Lagos where I can currently get a half plot of land for 15 - 25million Naira. I am particularly looking at areas with the following features:

- Great Security (very low armed robbery incidence rates, low concentration of louts)
- Decent phcn power (at least 10 - 15hours daily)
- Nearness to social facilities like shopping malls, supermarkets, nice relaxation spots etc
- Non-swampy or prone to flooding

The areas I'm considering that fit the above requirements are Ogudu, Ogba, Isheri-Olowora axis, Ikate, Argungi or any area on the island not beyond Chevron.

Please advise whether and where I can get a half plot of land within the stated budget in these areas or any other area in Lagos that you know is also suitable. Note that Ibafo-Mowe (distance), OPIC estate (flooding), Ikorodu, Iyana-Ipaja/Egbeda/Alimosho (distance), Lagos Island (louts), Ajah (poor security and distance), Agege/Iju/Agbado/Abule-egba axis (poor roads and louts) are out of my consideration due to the various factors already highlighted.

Appreciate your responses!

Pls help a brother's 2022 housing ministry and move to the promised land

Miraclenoble:
boss I don't try tire the thing just tire me,you know say no be everybody Sabi this tech things.
Abeg help me.

Miraclenoble:
ma'am I think I have done the needful, please help see through my endeavors just to make sure this helps .
Don't mind you still calling,thank you for your time.

Dotman2210:
OP follow this advice, you can't trust your step mom at this point, your dad doesn't seem to like you and I find it even more disturbing cursing your late mother, you can go apologize to him after like two days, BUT DON'T GO ALONE FOR YOUR SAFETY, and it is high time you keep your distance, try and get your place ASAP, I wish you all the best

Lucasmuyiwaa:
Thank you very much brr....
If I think about his behavior I will not go that house this night. But the stepmother told me to come home and she knows I respected her. I even told her man she’s trying to set me up but she said and swear she can’t let that happen even if he want to act violence not alone of her trying to set me up. Though i believed her

lexy2014:
Like Juliet Ibrahim who is now accusing her ex guy of rape

fortz007:
Good evening fam. I believe everyone’s doing okay. Please I’m caught in a dilemma. I have up to 5m and i have two options.
1. Get a high paying fed job
2. Go for msc programme in canada.
I believe everyone’s mature enough here to share their candid opinion.
I’ll be reading the comments. Thank you!

Miraclenoble:
.thank you sir,just like you propose calling to know how true this is.
I would be very happy receiving your call and to provide every possible details you would need.thank you sir

Miraclenoble:
really sorry about that,you promised to call in the other thread but didn't get to receive them and I tried updating and even mentioning you sir but didn't get any reply so I felt opening another could help get your attentions again.really sorry sir.

depure:
good point me too I am willing to also give but this little task is cool

Cyntie55:
There is this guy, we dated for 2 years before he traveled abroad (Italy) 2019. Our relationship was going on well even when he traveled out, we were always calling each other on video calls everyday. I was so faithful to him.

Suddenly (last year March), he started avoiding me. He could go for months before he replies my calls or chats.
Atleast no matter how busy you are, you can always spare 1 minutes of your time with the person you claim you love.

Please note, he's always online, We do video calls mostly on WhatsApp and anytime I try to reach him on video call or send him a message.... it always ring and deliver but he won't pick or reply.

Here are my reasons why I'm so confused whether to move on with my life or not.

1) Although before he started avoiding my calls, he told me he was busy... that he was working on something (but he never disclosed the particular "thing" to me)

2) We were supposed to get married as planned last year August. But this is May 2022 and absolutely nothing is in progress about it.

3)I discussed with his friend about it and he told me he's in a relationships over there. (I don't know if to believe him or not, because he didn't show me proof)

Now, it been a year I'm enduring his character. I feel like I'm stuck alone in this relationship. Heaven knows I haven't offended him in any way. I wish he could open up to me and tell me what I was doing wrong so that I could adjust. OR he should just tell me he's in a relationship so that I could move on.

I plan visiting his elder sister this weekend and explain to her the issue on ground but on a second thought I think I'm too forward. I'm jst confused and I feel hurt.