₦airaland Forum

Fantastic

Kemi Olunloyo is a respected journalist Mi mo o

So someone plagiarized your work and rather than the plagiarizer own up or get charged to court, the supposed victim attempts suicide? Ko le ye mi even if I read a million times over. Good plot for CSI abeg

I kinda figured that...

Juliusmomoh:
From pluto ma..

Were the chats explicit or not? Nobody born of a woman is worth killing yourself for. Your kids are definitely worth living for or what do you think? Is it this type of woman that is bent on going to the children's school to pay their fees herself or does not stock the house with food, u want to leave them with? Where did you meet her though?

MeeztaFabulouz:
It is really terrible to feel suicidal all because of marriage. I use use to see different news of how people commit suicide because of relationships and I always felt it was so stupid to think of suicide just because of a fail relationship.

Now I have seen it all clear that depression is really very bad especially when you feel so depressed in a marriage you work so hard and do everything to protect and make your family happy. Its very painful when you know honestly inside your heart that you don't cheat on your wife, provide everything she wants for herself and the kids even when business is quite rough.

She has no conscience and no regard for our union and our home. I am a guy that don't think about looking at wife's phone or suspecting her for anything but then after our first child she changed completely and as of today I don't know were I stand anymore because of my kids. I opened a business for her just so that she won't be like a house wife but she has completely taken the business more important than the family and wake up 4am to start cooking and close 8pm at night. Stressing herself so much but always complaining business is not moving and she is not making any money.

I sponsor everything in the home though am not complaining because that's what a man should do, but she does not have regard for anything or appreciate anything I do. Can you imagine I give her money for feeding weekly even though she is running a food business, she buys few food stuffs in the house which can stay almost two weeks without us eating them because we basically feed from food she cooks in her restaurant. I decided not to bother myself and just give her money to always ensure her business is moving and at least food will not be a problem for us.

One faithful day, I decided to check her phone because I observed a certain strange behavior about her and how she likes to off her phone at night or sometimes when I am around. I saw different chats with some two guys she claimed one was her ex boyfriend that just likes to check on her once in a while, and the other guy was someone I remember like coming to eat in her restaurant but she said they went to school together and he is working with a construction company doing a building project close to her restaurant. She also claimed that when they were in school he was asking her out even till they fished school but she preferred her ex boyfriend to him and when she had issues with her ex that was when I came into her life.

If the story she told me is true or not, I wasn't really bothered anymore because I know its normal for a woman you met at 26 years to have met other guys before you and obviously still has guys that don't respect people's marriage and still do anything to sleep with a married woman. But my paid now is because I feel so respected by many of the things she does and when I think of divorce, I only feel for my kids who will now have to grow up with another man or having to visit their mum and see her with another man.

Recently I have become so depressed that I have been thinking of suicide so that my kids will know their dad is no more rather than knowing that their dad is still alive but can only be with either daddy or mummy and not as a complete family. My depression is getting worse especially when I think about all I have done for her and the kids just to always make them happy but in return, she doest appreciate or even have any regard anymore for what is called "FAMILY"

Over 7 years now and at this point I really feel suicidal. Please I really need help because I make this big mistake.

Girls at 28 are at their 'hoeing' stage... where do u guys crawl out from?

Juliusmomoh:
Thank God u know u made a mistake..
And beside suicide is not the best opinion here...
.
U married her at the age of 28.. Don't u know girl of 28 are still in their hoeing stage ?... And instead of u to make her a complete housewife, u carry your hand go find wahala...
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Now the remedy...
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Loading..

N he had to give press conference to reconcile smh

My dear the background about the mum is not unnecessary. Serial marriages, fighting her prospective son in law like a thug after pocketing his 100k... nah! U cant pay me to marry into that family.

NoToPile:
You are dating your ex's friend?
She too agreed to date you?

Off course she will be called husband snatcher , what were you expecting.

All the story about her mum was unnecessary .


You better leave lady B before they hurt her real bad.

Mushin peeps are harsh oo

You sound delusional tbh. Trump spent all his time degrading you and blacks in general. Well, u def don't know better. Awon keyboard warrior

greymiles:
This is why I prefer trump!
Imagine choosing someone whose ancestors came down from a rope Over a Nigerian Jew.
Do I need to tell everyone that the Nigerian Jews are the best in Africa?

From Sudan or Niger? I just say make I ask?

Nazgul:
Madam don't waste your time. We all know that buhari is dead an the clone in ask rock is an imposter from sudan called Jubril.

Truth is that the presidency who remote controls him wouldn't subject him to any kind of medical examination to assertain his state of health.

All I can say is , wikes father has a church? I kent believe it

Wats nbm?

SAMBARRY:
Won't you share money for your fellow dirty wretched cultists roaming around the streets? I Heard you're an NBM member,go share money for them maybe the senseless violence in their body will reduce

All staged, if I must say. The chief whip wants to earn his exoneration from corruption related charges.

Truly, I try not to interfere in people issues at times cos they swing it to infer you are an enemy of progress or that you are jealous.

Its possible that the husband doesn't know better. The attitude hes putting up may be how he was raised or just the level of his exposure. I actually believe that people do better when they know better. Unfortunately, we believe that being moral or religious translates to being good spouses.

We need more therapists and licensed marriage counsellors in this country. Too many are too scared to seek counsel cos they end up as fodder for gossips. Theres a lot of stress taking a toll on the mental health of people who are invariably spouses. Traffic, job losses without adequate notice, poor medical care for dependants...it does add up to make people so angry and looking for whom to pounce on and sadly the cycle continues.

Klass99:
I told my neighbour the other day that if I were married to her husband, we would have been divorced by now - because I cannot tolerate for too long someone disrespecting me and talking down to me, the way he does.

It's a marriage of about 11 or 12 years (cos their first kid is 11) Even her 9 year old daughter asked her one day, mummy if daddy is treating you like this, why did he marry you? His treatment of her is still better than wetin dem dey do this OP, but for a lady like me it is still a deal breaker.

When something becomes a significant source of stress, I think it's time to let it go or just take a break from it for a while.

I felt oppressed and bullied reading OP's story and some of the comments here. It's as if women are expected to take whatever BS in marriage and not have any personal goals or aspirations of their own.

N they still put Dr in front of her name. Weeps for my fellow Nig women

Goldp5988:
3rd wife, and the lady is happy, GOD have mercy oh.

What a joke? Best speaker ko, best speaker ni. Wat is he speaking?This igbere tv must be some cheap awarding body void of merit and using cash as a basis for dashing Best whatever of the Federal Republic of Nig. Jokers

Just shut it, we really don't care and FYI y'all have lost all credibility with Nigerians even before the shooting. CNN's emphasis was never on the no of persons killed but that power crazy individuals also unfortunately known as the Nig govt authorized the shooting of unarmed protesters. What happened to tear gas?

I put myself in her shoes and thought even if I 'forgive', can I actually forget?

However, the lady in question still wants the marriage so I figured there might be some things she skipped in her op or she has Stockholm syndrome or she just wants to keep her child in a home with both parents.

Just reading all that, I felt traumatized to be honest but hey its Nigeria and women claim they are looking at the big picture when they absorb all sorts of disrespect.

Klass99:
Your comment had me LOL.

It is as if Nigerian marriages are typically meant to turn us into prayer warriors, always praying for one thing like the other user suggested OP should do around midnight.

As for the rest of OP's story and the subsequent events, after the main saga - I was wondering to myself, is marriage really worth all this stress and headache?

What women go through or have to endure/take, in the name of marriage, makes marriage very unattractive and unappealing.

@ op - you don't have to sign the divorce papers if you are not ready to. Priotise your mental and emotional health. Seek out joy in the littlest of things.

What an interesting 'international man'. Abeg make we hear word.

internationalman:
You just miss his financial assistance not him per se

You don't miss his dïck because there are many willing dïck if you are pen for it. But only few are ready to give you money

1. You will miss him less or won't miss him at all if there's a man giving you enough money even without sex

2. You will miss him more if there's a man giving you enough sex but without money like your ex

Dpr, npa, nnpc, firs

In wrapper no less. Shes a legend

Yeah, he could so the break up wont be on him. It's called reverse psychology. From her story, the husband was already incommunicado though she was sick n had a job she still had to meet up with. She was definitely damned if she did n damned if she didn't, unless theres more shes not saying.

Nemesis0147:
i tire bros
Why will he be insisting on her moving to Lagos if he has another woman

It's all bout wat she wants n she said she still wants the guy na so make I no talk.

CalliDora1:
If she still wants the marriage, let her pray concerning it. Or you want her to start all over again? Not easy now.

She might as well use that time to pray for success in her career.
As for the rest of her post, make I no talk.

CalliDora1:
Aw shit!

Why are some men this callous? You mean he sent you back all the way from Lagos with a baby at that ungodly hour? Without even setting eyes on you? This is not ordinary. Some strange woman is involved that's why he couldn't bring himself to let you into his house.

You know what? Go on a three days midnight prayer. I'm serious. Command every strange woman out of his house and out of his life. Then comnand him to come back to his senses and come back to you. In the name of Jesus. Hes yours and he goes no where. call him back!


Holy Ghost fire!

Chai!

But shes just 2. She only left the child with the Ewu for 2 hours. He should be castrated abeg

CalliDora1:
Animals everywhere.

Some mothers have chicken brains. How could you leave your girl child with a man, especially one who's not her biological father?

The man should be castrated if and when found.

I didn't protest and I certainly want Buhari out of office too but he could have won their hearts by showing some empathy but ofcourse he cant, hes Buhari

Se oro ni eleyin?

Coldie:
Stop committing suicide if someone does u evil.

Take a gun or knife to where he is and kill both u and the person it's far better than going alone

Yeah my point exactly. U can't know just by wat u read on social media

RedPanthar:
Same way she can be guiltless of his irrational logic

Why must he prove anything? Did SHE make the first move at reconciliation? Well, none of us know but hes been termed petty and unforgiving.

RedPanthar:
Did he try to call over the years to prove he's not bitter. Maturity makes the first move at reconciliation. Did he attempt that?

How do you know hes petty and unforgiving from a few Instagram posts. Don't get me wrong, he might be but its quite difficult to say from a distance. Also some misogynists can skew this to say, if you love your spouse, you'll learn to live with his family.

backnbeta:
If you love your brother, you'll learn to live with his choice of woman! You Paul are too petty and unforgiving!

Trying too hard....