₦airaland Forum

SexyFox:
Another one

Madam, you need to stop oppressing somebody with this your curl definition

I get the same comments, "are you going dreadlocked?" or "You are a natural dada, stop fighting it". Makes me wonder what exactly they're seeing.

I feel like relaxing my hair.... I'm sorta tired.

MissMeiya:
My sister, this year has sorely tested my optimism and patriotism. One of my followers told me just this week, "Nigeria has a funny way of changing people who try to change her." And it shook me like you wouldn't believe.

And all of this is diluted by distance, and I'm already wavering. Being an activist in Nigeria takes superhuman strength. Any activist who manages to retain their hope and purpose while actually in the country has my utmost respect.

Yesterday, I was chatting with my doctor (Indian woman) about my plans--she asked me why I was studying energy management. She's always been extremely motherly towards me (I don't know why, but I have that effect on Indian women), so she tends to advise and lecture me. She started telling me things about corruption in India, the country she left behind, and that people will never change, and do I think my parents would be happy if something happened to me, I should put myself first, because the people I think I'm helping will rarely thank me, and my efforts will likely be in vain. Chai! See discouragement! And she's not the first person to lecture me this way. Usually Hispanic, Caribbean, and Indian immigrants (always parents) get the same look on their faces when they find out. Maybe I need to seek out some white people lol. Look at Doctors Without Borders. Their people get killed, not just by illness, but sometimes by the people whose lives they're trying to save! I need some of that white people optimism lol

It is not worth it. Trust me, I speak from experience. I went from being very socially-conscious and trying to change society to being able to calmly ignore any calamity I see, as long as it is a Nigerian's. I feel bad, but seriously, not one person here is fighting for good, it's all their stomach, their ego, their tribe, their religion, their gender, their orientation, etc. I used to be appalled by it, but even Nigerians living in Nigeria discouraged me I have friends more concerned with what is going on with ISIS than BH (infact they keep hoping BH bombs Lagos). When I complain, they ask me "what is there to save in this godforsaken hellhole?"

When you have a rich family member, watch how all the hanger-ons will be pouring into your house, making demands and having expectations. Once that wealthy family member dies, you will never see them again.

I can't tell you how many relatives disappeared into thin air once that happened in my family. Even to make a phone call to check if we're alive, nothing.

Let me get rich and see the person who will come knocking on my door in the name of "family".

Even the fear of juju is hilarious. You are all righteous Nigerian christians, the Lord said over and over again "do not fear false gods made of wood". God planted a tree, man cut it down and carved it and you are terrified of it. You insult the Lord of Hosts.

Smile4kenn should win Comment of the year. I've never seen so many quotes for one post.

People are saying SSS and NA are there. Why? Are they arresting a fugitive? Imam Imam is saying they teargassed the place. For what??

Na wa o, a building in Nigeria is designed with wind loads and sound (depending on how high). Since those two are negligble in this part of the world, we add a small factor to the expected load.

Now, a plane jet caused the controlled demolition. Hilarious really. A very advanced fighter jet may be capable of using sound waves to shatter the glass of any building but I sincerely doubt any African country has that sort of plane. A regular plane has not destroyed any building yet in Lagos (not MMIA, but anyone who has been to Caverton fields and all those smaller airfields). Btw, does anyone even care to ask a pilot precisely where the air routes for landing at Ikeja pass?

Or we just want to go for our usual flavour of Nigerian stup.idity and gullibility koolaid we normally drink, bah

Achutebe:
Honestly, this poster has a point. If TB Joshua was giving bribes to all these people, by now, the ministry would have been bancrupt. How much do you need to pay to book a visit by GEJ and fashola?

If I run a business, sorry I meant Church, that generates millions upon millions of dollars annually, and it is in danger due to criminal negligence, how much do you think I will be willing to pay to rescue my business, sorry I meant church

Think of almost all the churches in Nigeria as profit-making businesses, that's when you'll understand their behaviour and thinking.

[b][/b]

MadCow1:
And the person who testified used dust cloud from the building as evidence of a controlled demolition..
What were they expecting to see emanate from the building? A water fountain?

I was hoping to hear someone talk about hearing explosions but obviously nobody did. Plus how can anybody have sabotaged that building that was always filled with people?

It obvious that the cover up has started already. A sound detective would have provided evidence of a secondary blast zone with burnt walls from the explosion or a chemical analysis of parts of the building showing the presence of chemical additives found in bombs.

That buildings collapse was caused by failure in one part of the structure that triggered a domino effect in throughout the rest of the building. It's already been established that the foundation was wrong and was not designed to carry the 4 additional floors that was built on it.

Nigerian police and government should keep taking Nigerians for a ride.. One day, we would reach our breaking point.

The police officer that gave that testimony should be fired for incompetence.

Lai lai! Don't underestimate the sheer stu.pidity of Nigerians! They will not only keep taking poo, they will smile and dance happily like retarded people will taking the poo. Any other rational society will have reached breaking point years ago, even other African countries would have snapped like an over-stretched rubberband. But not us. Your best bet is to leave before the insanity destroys you.

The number of happy, clapping, dancing churchgoers that will be singing like fo.olish children over this story will amaze you.
People are coming here to tell you they watched CCTV and compared the video to that which they saw on Youtube, it's all the same. Common sense did not stop them from wondering "the same bomb Boko Haram used to drive A CAR loaded with explosives into the UN building in Abuja only partially collapsed the front, how come SCOAN church completely collapsed? The controlled demolitions I saw on Youtube, the demolition company usually set the bombs internally at different measured points, how come no debris of bomb has been publicly brought out, no chemical analysis shows any traces of Nitrogen or anything used to make a bomb?" Noooo, instead they're frightened of annoying "Men of God", who have simply taken over their pysche in the same frightful way Babalawos of old did to their ancestors (those too were never questioned).

Nigerians deserve the hell-hole they exist in.

MissMeiya:
That's it? He watched that blurry, fuzzy CCTV video and used his inexpert opinion to conclude that it "looked like" a demolition? That's what took him a month to do?

Well...in this last month,

He could have asked an independent team of civil engineers and building constructors to submit a building design. It would show how much concrete and steel bars used as reinforcement. Plus a site inspection would reveal at least the german floor (so they can drill a hole and see they most likely used strip foundation, as that area of Lagos doesn't need a raft foundation, which is heavier). That design and results could have have easily been emailed to any construction demolition company in the world, in order to find out how many tons of explosive it would take to destroy a 6-storey building (here's a hint: you would actually find evidence of the explosive. When the WTC collapsed, lots of plane debris and metal bars for construction were melted due to the fact the planes were full of a high-octane fuel burning up fast). And then his boys will look for such evidence at SCOAN site...

But no, watching CCTV alone can tell anyone what happened. Very soon, doctors in Nigeria will CCTV footage of all the people supporting TB Joshua and will be able to tell us how they died. CCTV footage will be able to diagnose how advanced pregnancy is and whether it's twins. CCTV footage will be able to show all sorts of stuff.

My dear, are you sure you don't want to leave Nigeria for Nigerians? They sorta deserve the nonsense they live in. Miscarriage of Justice for a wealthy person, politician or religious leader is totally accepted here o. If a pastor attacks you, it must be your spiritual fault o...

Tiredwify:
Uhmmm....

Just like some of you suggested, i went on my knees to beg him. I apologised for locking up his shirt and every of my action that might have gotten him upset. Meanwhile, he stopped eating my food and sleeping in our room.

He said he knew my intentions were right but my approach was wrong. I told him that if he had answered my question that night maybe there wouldn't have been need for quarrels.

He apologised for beating me and that he didn't mean to.

Okay! Quarrel settled. I have resolved to do the following:

1. Speak to my pastor to arrange counselling classes for us
2. I will ask him for monthly upkeep and whatever he says becomes the rule for that month.
3. I will never ask him how he spends his salary again.
4. I will start saving on my own (massively)
5. I will ask him for every need in the house, i will assist in meeting the ones he cant meet.


Please chip in one or two things concerning these resolutions of mine.

Thanks for being there always!!!

I think you should have a right to know how your husband spends his money. You two need to start saving for your future (you cannot expect your children to support you in old age).
Men, you and your wife are 1. Share all with your wife, speak about finances together. Come together, share about how your day went, how to handle the children, outsiders. Your wife is NOT your enemy, she is your helpmeet, your co-commander, your biggest supporter. Be her champion.

SirShymex:
Lol, you saw it up, close, and personal because you were in the family, no? Or something you followed just like everyone else? Up, close and personal yano - lmaooo. Didn't you assert one time that you used to work, or know someone that worked/works in the slave underground rail road in Ohio? Stop making up things.
Still waiting for something logical from you.

Please who is this child with internet disturbing me?? How hard is it to work for the Underground Railway museum in Cincinnati OH or how hard is it to work in a company on K street, DC and mingle with the political crowd?
How hard is it to do clever stuff, oh I forgot, us "gehs" are meant to remind ourselves that when you cheat, we should be grateful one of you "princes" put one cubic zirconium on our finger and "saved" us by making us a "Mrs".
Oya! You're right! You know all! You're too correct! Chai, your correctness in all things makes sense! The Spirit of Being
Ever-correct could learn something from you!
Please go and find someone else to be exchanging pleasantries with on NL.

SirShymex:
I missed this yesterday. I shouldn't be doing this, but I'll do it for argument sake.

Now let's analyse the logic behind the "bad ar.se," can we?

If money is the reason why both Hillary Clinton stayed in their marriages, wouldn't it be logical in that context for them get divorced, and elope with half of their husbands' wealth - rather than stay there, and remain an appendage, while allowing the men to keep their wealth intact?

Then if it were the status. Let's leave Monica Lewinsky - Hillary Clinton was already a Senator and prominent figure in US politics when Bill Clinton was cheating with Liz Hurley. And if she had left him, it wouldn't have affected her one bit. Then Victoria Beckham was already a superstar with Spice Girls before David Beckham (though David Beckham had/still-has a higher net worth). And when he was cheating - she had already become a fashion icon. Heck, she was a big name in the fashion world back then, and she also just moved to New York to tap into the US market. So, if she had left him - it wouldn't have affected her brand. Victoria beckham made David Beckham a global brand/icon.

So, can you please educate me about the "bad ar.se" in her illogical rebuttals?

Sigh. I will speak only on the case that I saw upclose and personal and leave you to pull out whatever you like from whereever you get it from.

Hillary Rodham-Clinton has always had political ambitions. Even when she was First Lady. However, America (for all its Liberal posturing) is a very Conservative arena. They will vote a black man over a white woman.

And if I were married to a philandering man who happens to be the Tinubu of the Democratic Party of the United States, I won't divorce him. I need his support down the line for when I want to declare my candidancy for the Democratic Presidential ticket. Having people vote me as a Senator is way different from having my party leaders endorse me to take a presidential ticket. A fight which Hillary lost, the first time already, to Barack Obama. Because her position wasn't strong.

A woman who wants something badly, can play the long game.

Now I'm sure you will have all sorts of answers for this, to show how I'm wrong. After all, this is NL.

Excuse me ladies and gentlemen. I have important stuff to do now.

Me.... why....

I would weep only into my pillow at night, drying my tears and showing my husband a calm, happy, loving demeanor. I will remember that his cheating is MY FAULT and start dressing better and losing weight. I will understand that I am DRY, STALE GOODS and he can kick me out anytime for his younger, pregnant mistress. So I will behave myself in a fearful and wonderful way. I will cook for that new woman when she comes to my house and dutifully stay in the guestroom whilst my husband continues to enjoy himself with her. I I will be silent in the face of his disrespecting his vows. My silence will stand for Honour and Nobility from my other suffering peers (God forbid we change the status-quo!). All that High BP and stroke I think I am having, I will quell it. This is all for the sake of my children and the Institution of Marriage, which I and ONLY I, as the woman, has to uphold. Whilst letting him be in charge....

SirShymex:
And when did broke nyggahs start cheating? The only thing broke nyggahs have and use for stress relief is their wives' pum...cos there ain't no one checking for broke nyggahs out there.

However, these women have the world on their feet...and they could have opted for divorce, and run off with half of their husbands' wealth. But they never did that. They're classy women who understand the fact that imperfection is what makes us human. And that thought their decisions through, by looking at the bigger picture.

Only nasty and needy women think about wealth as the on glue that makes marriage work. Sometimes you just have to look at the bigger picture and what the institution represents, including the kids involved.

But why o why is it always women that have to look at the big picture and what the institution represents, did they force men into marriage that there is a Get-Out-Of-Jail-Free card that enables them to disrespect the institution they are asking women to uphold?

Is there a company where the people more concerned with the big picture and are willing to make sacrifices to make the company a global brand, were its employees, NOT THE OWNER? Did Steve Jobs not work even longer hours than his staff, is Obama not the one more stressed than his staff (and getting grey hairs faster).

How does it make sense that the HEAD OF THE HOME is disrespecting the public vows he took before his peers (because Marriage is a legal and Societal institution) but instead he wants the SECOND-IN-COMMAND to do an exemplary job of leading the children? Even in a bank, a non-performing ED will lose their position to a junior staff if they keep abdicating their responsibilities. So why are men so suddenly shocked that after years of cheating happily, their wives have also discovered the pleasures of another man's arms? Then you must have the same lack of foresight as the Nigerian govt, who, when the sun was shining (and oil was N140/barrel), did NOT make hay ( didn't save, were not fiscally prudent) and next year, pump prices are going to increase

Nigerians always shout "this is how it has been and it will never change" and be putting down any sort of Positive Change. Then once a few folks push it through, they scramble to catch up. My friend's father NEVER CHEATED, his wife was academically great and had a strong career. When she died, the whole world stopped. Her name is a rallying point in LUTH. Because she stood on the shoulders of a giant! All our underachieving, underperforming women are too worried and broken and filled with mistrust to fly high, whose shoulders will they stand on?

African men have always defied the laws of Reason and Logic. There are some few one out there, who understand that a woman will submit to a Leader. And to those ones, I salute and respect you.

jennykadry:
ROTFLMAO. Oh gawdddddd

But they insult all of us women with one side of their mouth, calling us "fishbrains, golddigger", then the other side of their mouth telling us to "accept their cheating, they are good fathers and providers, you need to be more submissive, Feminism is the cause of my selfishness to you".

I mean, why disappoint you men by attempting to live up to ideals you yourself have NO intention of living to? Is there a Heaven nicer than regular Heaven that long-suffering, patient, backbreaking wives will go to (because it is not in my bible).

Dear men, when you start behaving, it will shock you how the world will realign itself correctly.

When the head is acting insane, the body starts to dance the mad-man's dance (old proverb)

SirShymex:
Anyway OP, continue to be a good wife, make sure you create an atmosphere for peace at home, and he has to use condoms with you. And hopefully, with prayers, he will outgrow this phase.

Hillary Clinton, Victoria Beckham, and Kobe Bryant's wife stood by their husbands and helped them change to become upstanding men lol. You can do the same.

And these are great women with great achievements who deal with reality not fantasies.

Shalom.

If my husband was a WEALTHLY FORMER PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES, A WEALTHY EX-FOOTBALLER (MOST LIKELY TO END UP IN GOVT) or A WEALTHY BASKETBALL PLAYER (who will most likely sign a 6-figure deal to write his memoirs after he retires)....

Baby, I will fight any oloshi strolling around him, cook him egusi and pound yam daily and pray unceasingly for him

But y'all broke brothas, you will be cheating, giving me High BP, I cannot even afford to fly the kids and I out for a weekend in Dubai, instead I'm in your rented house, waiting to turn off the gen at 10pm and sleep in heat, skabashing in the darkness telling myself "he will return to my arms one day" whilst you are shouting "hallelujah!" on top of one woman in an air-conditioned hotel room somewhere....

As my aunt said to her ex-husband, "I'm leaving you because you're cheating and beating me and you cannot give me hypertension and AIDS when you haven't even built your house"

She went on to marry a widowed retired military General #CorrectWoman

babyosisi:
Another regular cheating thread?
Gosh!
Are we going to run away from this family section for you people?


Please come back with more stimulating topics like

" my husband's mistress drives a Benz and I am hopping okada"
" my husband hasn't give me HIV yet,what should I do""
"My husband's third mistress gave birth to triplets and I am yet to carry belle"
" where in mile 2 can I buy authentic otapiapia for my husband "
" I just shot my cheating husband ,am I a widow"

COMMENT OF THE YEAR!!

Let me add my own: Abeg ladies, stop disturbing our ears with threads like "HOW DO I COPE WITH MY CHEATING HUSBAND", be more scintillating, let's hear stories like:

"After 25 faithful years to my cheating husband, his mistress showed up at his burial with a son claimed all his property. My daughters and I have nothing!"

"My cheating husband only gave me Gonorrhea this time, how long before he gives me HIV?"

"Am tired of going shopping, looking nice and seeking for ways to distract myself. Is there any place else I can go to, so I don't think of my cheating husband?"

"Now my kids are all grown up and in school, which hobbies can I take up so I don't notice my husband's cheating?"

"My husband gave his mistress Apple 6 yet I'm using Curve 2. Do you think I should pray more or cook egusi more lovingly for him?"

"My husband's girlfriends are all yellow, please where is Mama Tega's shop located, I need a bleaching cream"

Well, firstly, you have to swallow your pride. I mean it, even to your wife. Humble yourself now before her (trust me on this, everyone will scream at you but I'm speaking from experience). Tell her you love her for her sacrifice and you thank her for this (she's giving up her kids so the family has a fighting chance). You are a team, screw this head of blah blah, YOU ARE A TEAM. Your weaknesses are her strengths, her weaknesses are your strength.

Good, that's out of the way. Let her take the job. Since she's the provider for now, do not dictate to her, instead ask her to come with a savings plan for the next 6 months to 1 year (most people won't take house helps for less than a year). With that plan, both of you sit down and discuss it, mull it over, turn it up and down, make sure there's extra expenditure. You two have to be united.

Tell her to impress her employers, love their kids like hers, work like she's the oga's mother. Not easy, but do it.

You, get a place to sleep, that's the most important thing.

Now, you are going to dust up your CV, look for some trusted people here on NL and pm them, ask them to help you with your CV.

There's a ministry called Esther Breakthrough, they usually place people with jobs in small businesses you may not have access to, go and join them. Go to the nearest business hub with your new CV and knock on doors politely, tell each office you are a hardworking man seeking employment (DO NOT BEG FOR MONEY OR BRING OUT YOUR SOB STORY AND START TELLING THEM ABOUT YOUR HARDSHIP. Everyone has a tough story nowadays). Be professional, speak to the staff nicely. A lot of jobs are available but not advertised. You will get a job you never heard of, because you applied methods that were different.

While you're looking for a job, spend your waking hour reading up the newspapers and financial sections of NL. BE INFORMED ABOUT EVERYTHING AND ANYTHING. People pay for knowledge or skills. You have to be prepared when Opportunity comes knocking.

Part of the money needed for your waka is from your wife (see why you have to be united? Because some days, her madam will act like a crazy person and she will be so exhausted, that when you come for some funds and you act all "Naija man", your wife's patience will snap, like any normal human being would).

I'm telliny you what to do, because my sister's first nanny to her kids was in your exact same position and the family is progressing now because they were similarly advised by my mum, my favourite nanny as a child was in your wife's position and now she's a graduate with a family and guess who helped her husband get a good job? A seed of years ago is still bearing fruit.

Please take this as a GREAT OPPORTUNITY to sow an amazing growth into your life.

ccnation:
I want to fault the BOLDED in your post.
This is a script that played in my home, though i am not the victim.

I grew up to find out that one of my elder sisters was quite different from the rest of us, not physical appearance but attitude and attributes. The rest of us got more love and priviledges than she did despite her being the eldest among the female children. At certain point, she became rebellious and this severed her relationship with us all including our parents because we started seeing her as a black sheep. She latter came back to being one with us but things couldn't just return back to normal because a seed of discord has been sown in our minds while growing up.

Although our parents are late now, but not until recently i got to find out the origin of the whole situation.

It started with the circumstances surrounding her birth. Before she was born, our parents had two children (a boy and a girl). The girl was the eldest and much loved by my father. During the period of my sister's birth, the girl child died of TB. My father was so pained, hence he went to seek a cause. He was told the new child exchanged the life of the older girl. From that moment my father hated the new child passionately that she had to be handed over to my maternal grandmother.

I'm now a grown man and know better.

This is so awful. An innocent child's happiness was ruined because some stranger told her parents she was the cause of her sibling's death. And even worse, her parents believed it and punished her for it.

Honestly, there should be some kind of monumental exam before they let people have kids. It shouldn't be for everyone.

It's tough. I don't like hawking but it's preferable to begging on the streets. I don't know why families where the breadwinner's salary is N30,000/month and it may be delayed some months, will have more than 1 kid and happily say "children are from God", then expect society to take care of them for you.

Local and state Governments are very corrupt and we should hold them accountable to providing programs to keep kids off the street. Nigeria is lucky we don't have a strong drug culture like in the US, because these kids would be armed with guns, selling drugs and shooting at themselves.

We need to pass a 2 child-policy. Max. But other societal problems will arise, if a family's 2 kids are girls, there will be a fight for boy children. We will end up like China (it'll work for some years and later become a detriment).

There's something wrong with them.

I gave one 4 different materials and some of the money in June, he told me "first week of July, come back".
In August, I showed up. Not only had he not even cut it down, but he decided to change one style for one of the dresses and started arguing with me that I was the one who made the mistake.
In September I went there, screamed and screamed and took 2 of the materials away. He swore in a week that he will finish the 2 left.

By October, I went and sat the day there. So he finally started sewing them (and gave one to his girl to sew). When he heard me on the phone asking my friend for another tailor to sew some wediing clothes I had, he began to complain "na dis ordinary, small matter wey dey make u leave my shop go do business outside, e good?"

I could have slapped him. I took a friend there in June, when she saw what I was going through, she started looking for another tailor.

Nigerian artisans don't believe in doing a job well. Then they complain they're not making money, run to mosque/church to start praying for business.

Do you know now that all those big tailors in Ikeja and on the island hire Togolese, Beninoise, Filipino and Chinese tailors? I met some, the sewing is neat, those guys take pride in their work, the jobs get done on time. All the designers said working with Nigerian artisans was a nightmare. More artisan jobs are going to foreigners, while Nigerians will be disturbing God with prayers and shrieks for work (when it is their own fault no-one can hire them).

Same thing with carpentry, a number of foreigners are now setting up carpentry shops. Nigerian carpenters will now start trying to guilt you about patronising them over "your country people". Mstchewwww.

jasperkrekre:
I don't blame u. obviously ignorance is killing u gradually...BTW I'm an architect with bsc and MSC ...bn practising since 2009 that I graduated.... so pls stop talking about what u don't know miss onegia...let me lecture you a bit...10years ago when I was in 100level..we are thought that architecture is d intersection between art,science and technology... so architecture cut across art,science and technology.. one must have a full knowledge of mathematics,physics etc to study architecture... i did a course called theory of structure from 200level to my master level...d course is all about structurability of buildings, shear force/stress, bending moment...infact...there is greater disparity between an architect and an artist...if one is good artistically and poor in science d person won't go far in architecture..

Which University did you attend? I just showed your reply to some architects and they started laughing as well. Please don't ever make me laugh like this again, are you comparing your Archi B.Sc and M.Sc from FUTA or somewhere like that, to University of Bath School of Architecture and Civil Engineering? Maybe you went to a state school, because at University of Ife and University of Lagos, year 1 and year 2 do Drawing, not Technical Drawing. A lot of their architects end up being good at Visual arts. Perhaps your school curriculum was not as concise. Also, your grammar could do with some help.

Mehnn, I now believe it when people complain that all sorts of rubbish will be spewed on NL and the people saying it will be sounding like they know something.

jasperkrekre:
BTW architecture is a full time science course. one must have a concrete knowledge of physics, chemistry,mathematics,technical drawing to study architecture....Oga Ade architecture is not an art course...

You must still be in Secondary school. Go and ask Architecture students, Year 1 and Year 2 how much Art and Drawing they need to do. Most of them will never look at a Chemistry textbook again for the rest of their lives. But they will study the shege out of History of Architecture (from Roman bathhouses to Zaha Hadid)

It's because they need Technical Drawing, Mathematics and Physics, that Architecture was pushed to Sciences. And this our division of Sciences and Arts classes is archaic, no elementary school or high school does that, they focus on what courses you choose each term, with a basics of Maths, English, Chemistry, Physics, one Language, Geography and History

lol, this is funny sha.

Do you know how much lawyers at Perchstone and Gray are making?

Do you know how many white people companies hire when they want to fund the Liberal arts in Nigeria, particularly NGOs and such?

Do you know how much Visual arts (painters and sculptors) are making? Not the street ones o

Do you realise EVERY single firm needs an accountant?

Do you know how much a well-trained Digital artist or animator can make, especially in a country like Nigeria (where we have none?)

Do you know how many of your upper middle class Nigerians came back from abroad with a degree in Communications and got a high-paying job at Guiness, NB (and No, Daddy didn't call in a favour)?

Do you know that the foremost expert on Benin Art is a German woman who has so much funding from so many governments, she won't even bother to reply a Nigerian (Bini person for that matter!) email?

If you knew the amounts of money people make from the Arts, I can dash my Engineering degree to anyone right now, I get paid more than most contract Engineering staff at Construction firm. Go and see Engineers fighting for jobs at PWC (an audit firm). Surprise yourself by learning Arabic, Cantonese/Mandarin, French and Spanish. Jobs will come knocking at your door, asking you to let them in please.


It pains me so much we don't have a School of ceramics, carpentry and pottery in Nigeria. The kind of money those artisans will be making! Those that do it well are quietly reaping profits.

MissMeiya:
Back in the days of European monarchies when they insisted on pure bloodlines. They inbred themselves.

Lots of genetic abnormalities. Royalty were often mad, crippled, deformed, etc. Kings were expected to have as many heirs as possible, because of high infant mortality. So when children died (perhaps of birth defects), the surviving ones could still inherit.
As science progressed, humans discovered that offspring produced from the mating of closely related individuals results in results in homozygosity, which increases the chances of offspring being affected by recessive or deleterious traits. This generally leads to a decreased biological fitness of a population.
And countries began to pass laws making incést illegal.
But of course, we don't believe in science in Nigeria. So just check your European Bible/Arabic Koran, OP.

Very true, and case in point, the Hapsburg dynasty. There were a lot of birth defects and the last child out of all the inbreeding had soo many health issues. Also, Tutankhamen of Egypt suffered from genetic inbreeding effects. However, it was because there was A LOT of inbreeding, like Uncle will marry Niece, then their child will marry her First cousin and their own child will marry his own first cousin (both of who were probably First cousin and Second cousin), European model OR Sister will marry brother, their child will marry another sister, etc Egyptian model.

If you marry your first cousin and your child marries some outsider, as long as your grandaparents were not siblings, all should be well.

I do have some rather hawt cousins. But they're the "your-grandpa-and-his-grandpa-are-related" cousins. I did have a 2nd cousin that was smitten by me

Sometimes, what our ancestors assumed in the past was witchcraft or a curse from the gods was a sigh of inbreeding (certain facial deformities or some strange disease that makes your bones not strong plus a clubbed foot and wide hips on a male). I think that's why in my area, we aren't encouraged to marry from the same village e.g, my village consists of smaller villages. The king of my area can't marry me (politically and genetically) but I never realised why until now. 6 villages make up the town, go and wed from another village in the town, that sort of thing. So I cannot marry anyone from my mum or dad's villages, before I shine my teeth too much at him, they will tell us we are "cousins".

dawealthiestman:
can't think of anything to comment so I'm just going to post a pancake recipe.

1 1/2 cups milk
1 egg
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
2 cups all-purpose flour
1/4 teaspoon bicarbonate of soda
1/3 cup caster sugar
25g butter, melted
Whisk milk, egg and vanilla together in a jug. Sift flour and bicarbonate of soda into a bowl. Stir in sugar. Make a well in centre. Add milk mixture. Whisk until just combined.

Step 2

Heat a large non-stick frying pan over medium heat. Brush pan with butter. Using 1/4 cup mixture per pancake, cook 2 pancakes for 3 to 4 minutes or until bubbles appear on surface. Turn and cook for 3 minutes or until cooked through. Transfer to a plate. Cover loosely with foil to keep warm. Repeat with remaining mixture, brushing pan with butter between batches. Serve.

Excellent recipe! Will try out soon for sure

Heavenly Father, in my next life, you HAVE to make me a white person. My brain must be this evolved.

These are like zen, so calming and inspiring.

There are shops they sell them, Ojuelegba close to the bridge has them (look up, the shop is on the first level). I don't have their address or contact, I've seen them when going by. I heard they have them at Trade Fair too. HTH

Everyone defending this man's right to secure his family's safety, well don't complain that civilians are complying with Boko Haram's efforts.

After all, if you see your home being attacked and know that the person in charge will air-lift his family away and leave you to die if you dare fight the insurgents, won't you smile and offer BH fighters food and drink, so they don't kill your family? Why should your family be in danger (trying to protect Nigeria's sovereignity) when the man WHOSE JOB IT IS is taking care of his own blood?

Is it not this "my bele alone" attitude that has gotten us to this point?

The same mouth they use to defend Alex Badeh's actions is the same mouth they use to insult Northern leaders and call them complicit in BH's actions. Or abi Imams don't love their families?

Hypocrisy.

The sheer foolishness I see on NL sometimes is a sad reflection of the society

berem:
Fashola for Nigeria's Vice President 2015!
We in Lagos appreciate his good works so far. He has done marvellously well.

Eko no go spoil o!!

He's done nothing. Take it from someone who worked in his government. Everything this man wrote is true. Do you know how much my allowances were, and I know how low my grade was. I know how much those higher than me took home from LASG as "allowances". Even my mum who's seen Corruption upclose was horrified. Imagine giving Meeting allowance because Lagos state govt parastatals were going for a day's meeting to another LASG parastatal. Every meeting, they would demand to be fed, only for us to not achieve anything. Every launching, they would select pretty women from LASG and share free ankara and call them "hostesses" for the ceremony (Lord knows the ladies did nothing). How they would insist on govt car (and be parking their own private cars down the street, pretending not to have any) and got them. How they jump queue at GH and refuse to pay for drugs (then the hospital staff will start telling poor parents that the so-called "free" malaria meds for kids provided for by LASG has finished, they should buy it). The number of foreign trips for "training" abroad and led to nothing. The sheer wastefulness...

Do you know how many excellent Business proposals and companies have been killed, just so they (LASG) can award it to their people, who proceeded to do a shoddy job? The number of jobs lost is astronomical. I know of at least 2, which would have made Nigeria PROUD and hired Engineers, Scientists and Technicians and trained them for 25 years. I didn't know the people behind them but I almost cried when I saw what they were going through at the hands of my bosses (LASG).

Lagosians are clapping after eating sand because they are used to eating mud as Nigerians.

This was not the first time the attacker had beaten his wife, yet she returned.

I'm pretty sure a lot of people told her to "pray, endure, be patient, be respectful, smile when he's cursing you, it must be spiritual, wear something nice, don't ever ask him for anything, just take care of yourself and your kid but don't you ever dare neglect him, don't nag, infact don't say anything to him short of words of blessings, call a pastor, tell no-one, don't you dare leave that would make a feminist..."

And I'm 99% sure all those people are going to tell her her son is dead, then blame her for not protecting him.

Nigerian society is simply wonderful and makes so much sense :/

jumbotron:
I am utterly confused by what is going on in the minds of young Nigerian men and women. If someone had the time to write this lengthy list and expect everyone to agree, fully insult people with different opinions, we should have more young people at the fore fighting for a better Nigeria with the same passion.

I am a mother & wife and what many young men on this forum would call a feminist due to my beliefs, unfortunately a lot of us do not even know the difference between a feminist and an obnoxious woman. Apparently, to the nairaland man once you have a differing opinion, you are a feminist that will die a lonely spinster with 30 cats.
I have a very happy family and a Sig. Other who respects who I am and I in turn worship the ground he walks on because he does not try to stifle my voice and he knows his place as the head of our home, he does not need me to do a special dance, walk on egg shells etc to proof it to him. I feel very sad because we, the mothers have raised entitled men who do not know that their place is at the top and when the family structure is broken or breaking, it is due in part to the heads being slack in their duties. I am not a fan of the uptick trend in divorces and single motherhood but SirShymex, these women that you look down on are not divorcing themselves or reproducing by themselves. There are some (a small number by the way) who enjoy the fantasy of having babies but as a man, as a potential head of a household, you should be mindful of the women you lay with. Yes, the woman bears the brunt of an unwanted pregnancy and she should also be careful but I am addressing my young men because y'all are screaming we are the heads, we are superior and you are acting otherwise.

Our "Heads" are failing woefully and I do not know if it is pride, ego what you might call it but nothing is being done to correct this problem. You pass out these lists to women and what are the men doing to prepare to be better husbands and fathers...nothing. What are you doing to prepare yourselves to pick compatible spouses? Instead, you are steady picking women that are not ready to fill the roles you so badly want them to fill.

Please do not get me wrong, there are some misled, downright horrible women out there but the rate at which some of you complain on here, one would think all Nigerian women are neck twisting, man bashing, control freaks. Gentlemen, if you are running into "unfit" women time and time again, check yourself.
If I was not married and I did not know other married couples, I would be scared of what this upcoming generation of husbands will look like. Rants and rants, threads shouting down anyone that dares speak up for herself(are some of the ladies going about it the wrong way...yea) but please talk to happily married men, let them tell you what they are doing right. Don't be a man that is quick to call a woman out by all kinds of names...wow. A good woman still embarrasses the tenets of marriage but you will get kickback if you continue to hold an oppressive mentality (afterall, you can only hold a person down for so long).

When people complain about Naija, they do not blame anyone but the "Head", the blame does not go first to the 2nd in command. Young Men, you need to take your place as the heads and stop being so whiny (no offense). The breakdown in the family structure is not solely the woman's fault.

As for the list, I thank goodness most men are not walking around wielding To Do's in the faces of women. Look, find a woman that is compatible to your vision and goals in life. If both of you are on the same page, you will grow together in love and raise a family of champions. All these lists smack of a whole lot of something bad. I am truly worried for some of my young brothers on this forum.

Forgive the length, I tend to be wordy.

May I get to know you in real life? Please I may be settling down soon and gosh I need people like you in my life. Nigerian marriages sound terrifying, nightmarishly bad and horrible, especially when you read NL and the men commenting on it. You, on the other hand, are mature and calm and have respect and are respected by your spouse. So I need to come and learn from good example.