₦airaland Forum

elimsun:
Good day great people of nairaland. I'll make this as short as possible and forgive my typo errors.
I've been working in this construction firm for the past five years together with taking care of my family and my girlfriend who has been in school but due to ASUU strike, now at home.
I'm usually busy and spend less time at home except on weekends - Sundays.
Recently, my girlfriend has been talking me into changing the nature of my work to another job that will afford me the opportunity to give more time to my family and her. I insisted that I'll need more time to be able to find another job but she will not have it that way.
Seems to spoke to my mother about it and it's now hell in the home with my mother threatening she will kill herself if I don't quit the job. This job is something I have used in completing my house and paying the fees of my girlfriend.
Lest I forget, I got the hint that my manager is considering me for a promotion and my quitting the job might just spell doom on me!

I'll appreciate all your suggestions, advice and criticism. I'm really in a fix!

Whiteheartbit:
Hello naira landers.
I really need your advice on what to do about this.
Sex with my wife has become so so boring that after it i most often time regret leaving whatever I was supposed to do for it. I mean the feeling of it was not worth it at all
I've tried all I know, I've read books and bought some for her to help out for our sexual life, yet the improvement is short leaved.

We've been married for Six years with two kids. Yet from the day we got married I can count how many times I've kissed my wife during or not during sex.
I've called her attention to it, if I managed to kiss her I must have begged my way through.
Like a secondary school chap.
------ I enjoy kissing -------- which she knows, she'll promise making a change yet no Change.

Okay, I've come to understand with her that maybe kissing is not her thing as it is for some women. Fine I don't go to that area any more.

All of a sudden, she's not interested in fore play of any kind, which I love to engage in no matter how badly I want to get in because I want the satisfaction to be mutual, but She just want me straight in.
Many times I'm filled with wondering thoughts while making up with her.
Peradventure she agrees to a pre-intimacy after much bagging and persuasion, it's not more than 5mins with restrictions to some parts. GGGGGGGGGGod!
I'll just be like what is this.

I've called her on serveral occasions if something was wrong, if she was going through any emotional stress or something I could help out with or change, response always negative.

Yet no improvement.

I don't know who to talk to, because I'm a very private person and respects privacy.

I'm doing my best to make her and the kids happy, to the best of my ability as God is helping me.
I'm a very charming and romantic dude, the best I know about myself in that area, which she has also told me.
I've never cheated on her, not once and I don't intend to and she knows.

I had to come up here to seek for help because it's getting out of hand.

To the point that I seek her consent if we can make out for the night ( it's not the top priority in our lives though, but it's necessary) she sometimes come up with an excuse which I'll understand or she agrees but ends up disappointing ( i.e sleeps off or not in the mood) and I get pissed off, because I'm left ganging and she doesn't care. My God!
For about a month it's been dry sex and it's making me feel as if I'm violating her, forcing her against her will.
The very last time it was as if I was making out with a dead body, no sound, no moves, no connection. Mahn o Mahnnnn

I'm at the verge of taking the selibacy way, because that was my vow before I married her.
This sex thing is distracting me.

I need advice, is there something about women I don't known because I've read and researched about women.

odinson1:
Your wife is not Sexually attracted to you,she only married you because of stability and as a retirement plan. If she's not having sex with you,then she's most probably having it with another,a guy she finds sexually attractive.
No amount of Pleading or therapy will get her to fall in love with you. Women and simps here will tell you to take her out and buy her gifts etc, so she can be appeased and allow you put in the tip,but how long will you be willing to keep that up?

Run a DNA test on those kids of yours

Kirchoffs:
Should I return almost 500k that was paid into my account?

Younglady06:
Whenever I have issues with my husband, we settle and move on but later in future when we have an argument again he brings up the things I said back then to the picture I really do not know why he does this but most times I’m hurt and I feel this’s something I have begged him for forgiveness for and he tells me I have forgiven you..
Most times I do not even remember I said stuff because I feel we have moved on..
Note, anytime he says things that hurt or break me I do not even bring it up when we have any argument but he does this to me effortlessly.
What do I do? Thank you
*He also tells his mother all sort when we have an argument and this’s something I will never do to him.. I will never speak bad of him to my parent or my siblings when we have issues but anytime we have issues he finds it very easy to call his mother and his brother to tell them all sort..
He involves his friends also when we have issues but any time we have issues I do not tell my parent or even my siblings or even friends

2saviourfriday9:
Pls am seeing some peoples planting this thing all over my area and I don't know the name and pls what are they using it for

Mod fp pls

Cyntie55:
There is this guy, we dated for 2 years before he traveled abroad (Italy) 2019. Our relationship was going on well even when he traveled out, we were always calling each other on video calls everyday. I was so faithful to him.

Suddenly (last year March), he started avoiding me. He could go for months before he replies my calls or chats.
Atleast no matter how busy you are, you can always spare 1 minutes of your time with the person you claim you love.

Please note, he's always online, We do video calls mostly on WhatsApp and anytime I try to reach him on video call or send him a message.... it always ring and deliver but he won't pick or reply.

Here are my reasons why I'm so confused whether to move on with my life or not.

1) Although before he started avoiding my calls, he told me he was busy... that he was working on something (but he never disclosed the particular "thing" to me)

2) We were supposed to get married as planned last year August. But this is May 2022 and absolutely nothing is in progress about it.

3)I discussed with his friend about it and he told me he's in a relationships over there. (I don't know if to believe him or not, because he didn't show me proof)

Now, it been a year I'm enduring his character. I feel like I'm stuck alone in this relationship. Heaven knows I haven't offended him in any way. I wish he could open up to me and tell me what I was doing wrong so that I could adjust. OR he should just tell me he's in a relationship so that I could move on.

I plan visiting his elder sister this weekend and explain to her the issue on ground but on a second thought I think I'm too forward. I'm jst confused and I feel hurt.

Silas6:
I Used a big Stone to kill this crocodile this morning at my work place. I thought that it was alligator or monitor lizard but on a closer examination we discovered that it is a baby crocodile.

That thing has double life oo! I hit it with more that five big stones before it finally died.

I dey fear o! I no fit chop am
I don carry am give aboki

Why u kill am first?

siofra:
Whatever!!!

That's your business.

Nigerian men are evil.

Nyascobar1414:
Abeg try marry retired runs girl..
Ah wan check something!

YINKS89:
So I was on Twitter this afternoon when I stumbled on this interesting topic where they where asking if the wife should collect money from her husband for eating in her restaurant.

Nairalanders my question is this if you wife owns a restaurant and you go there to eat are you to pay or if you are the husband that owns the restaurant would you collect money from your wife.

Cc: lalasticlala broadcast and let's hear what people has to say.

Sixfiguresmart:
So, she felt bored since she moved in from her previous base. She got not friends around and was always home. Friends has a tasking job.
So, he asked me to call her sometimes when I am free. I call and we have healthy conversations for hours. I am very cautious of any emotional strings. I spell it out to her in clever ways during the conversations.

However, it is becoming addictive. She obliges to certain things only when I ask her to even after declining her husband's suggestions. My friend is so soft and can't seem to handle a tough and educated lady like her.
So, she compares me to him few times and wants him to be like me in terms of being conversational and humurous. Her man isn't willing to change.

So, I am distancing myself away from her because it is becoming an addiction for her to express herself freely with me and spend more time with me rather than my friend. I step in each time they quarrel.

Should I continue the healthy conversation spree or continue with my busy shedule excuses?

Lordmech:
One of my colleague at work came begging for cash and I ask him. What happen to your ATM or salary and he reviewed that the wife is the one who sees alert and holds the card.. I was shocked.
My pipo is this love or stupidity?

Luigi02:
I've seen a lot of people here claim Britain could invade us for our oil, since they no longer have access to Russian oil and others like Saudi arahus, Qatar etc have rejected to pump more. Now I know, those claims were made jokingly, but I was actually imagining a scenario like that. Could Britain actually be able to Conquer us if they're stupid enough to invade us?
Let me have your contributions because I actually think we would be able to repulse or beat them back in total humiliation

2braithe:
So I'm currently in 300 level with a plan to leave the country immediately after my NYSC.
Since I'm studying a 4 year course in a private uni,I have about 3 years more in this country.

I wish to get a car with a budget of 3.5 to 3.8 million naira.
Due to the 3 years duration coupled with police harassing young car owners.

Is a car really worth buying now or I should jejely wait till I move??

You don't t need one.

I need inputs please.

ProphetofOdin:
Hi,
Please I will try to be brief as possible as i can.
I work with a firm that sells construction equipment, and head the logistics and warehouse department. I have this junior colleague that has been with the company for 8years(long before i joined cos i have only been there for 2+ years), he is experienced and good at his job.
But yesterday i caught this guy trying to steal two pieces of 70ah batteries, it really broke my heart because he can not even sell this things for up to 100k. I have tried everything in my capacity to make sure those working under my dept enjoy every benefits that are due to them; from hazard allowance, overtime, and so on. I sign all this allowance without asking questions even when sometimes some of them are questionable. I was doing all this so that nobody has any reason to steal and they have small change to augment their salary.
Personally i hate theft and frown at it and they all know it cos i keep preaching against this at every meeting, and if i escalate this to the management at the HQ in Lagos, he might be sack without benefits after 8 long years and he is a family man.

Though I have scold him and told him he would hear from me by Monday morning, the truth is given the situation I don't know what to do with this guy.

I am really confuse cos i don't even know how long he has been doing this shit.

BigRocky:
So guys my dad killed a hawk and I believe u guys would love to get a glimpse of it.

Below is my kid bro displaying the creature while I snapped.

omolola100:
I decided to go and pluck cashew , and I saw this Bush Rat under the cashew tree, it was still breathing when I saw it, I had to use a long stick to smash the head.

debbydams:
lol..this post was created last year Nov

debbydams:
Dating pool is now a mess right now, a big mess. If you are already married, God has saved you. If you are in a serious relationship with someone who's goin to marry you, you are very luck lucky.

A lot of us are in relationships but single, you think you are dating someone but the person is not even dating you. I think we need to talk about how damaged alot of us are, how materialistic we have become, how sex obsessed most of us are, how selfish?

"I deserve the best" yes you are but while you deserve the best , is your partner getting the best as well?

Our generation is just too selfish.
It is always about 'you'

You want your partner to accept you the way you are but you are a bag of negativity and emotional liability, you are unstable, you are selfish, you don't look inside, you never tell yourself the truth and you want your partner to accept you when you are not even ready to change.

But you want people to change for you but you're not willing to change for them in return. Isn't that selfishness?

No sincerity, No commitment, No honesty, No love, just expectations without reciprocation.

We keep blaming our partners for our mistakes..

There's no day we won't hear about divorce, domestic violence, bf killing gf, gf stabbing bf ,

How long will this continue?

It's tiring

#Lalasticla