₦airaland Forum

Ezendimmuo:
My girlfriend likes food a lot...
Sometimes what she wants might be above my budget
I just graduated...no job yet ..
She can call guys on the phone in my presence and beg them for money...
There is this "married" man she sees and has actually spent the night with him and she swears that nothing happened between them...
I can't provide for her needs....
I can't also stop her from getting them...
I love this girl so much
She loves me too..
Anytime I think about this...
It makes me sad
I wanna end everything...
But I can't...
What do I do

You either don't know what love is or you have a deep sense of inferiority complex.

She doesn't love you

Warrior14:
I will be getting married in 3 weeks time but I'm not happy
I'm getting married to a man who has beaten me two different times. I'm getting married to a man who is heartless and doesn't know how to love and treat a woman right. I'm getting married to a man who does not have a mind of his own.

I'm getting married but I'm already thinking of divorce.

I'm overwhelmed! I'm physically strong but I'm weak.
Just don't want to wake up from my sleep so I won't have to continue with this marriage plans as I can't stand the shame of calling off the marriage at this time.

All the advice for you to run or cancel the wedding will fall on deaf ears.

You value the idea of marriage more than your own well-being and happiness.

Listen, the man will kill you. You are not married to him and he is beating you, by the time you marry him, he will kill you.

That marriage may be your coffin.

I know you will say 'God forbids... that's what others in the grave said when people advised them.

dominique:
Two women can't be legally married to one man, one marriage will not be recognized by the law. Did your father not leave a will? If your eldest brother was a responsible person, he ought to have liquidated the property and shared it amongst you all regardless of gender. If he's the very greedy type, just remove your hands from the property. Perops like that can go extra lengths to make sure you don't stop him from claiming the property.

This advice is strange. How can two women not be legally married to a man?
According to English law, yes but according to the customs and tradition of our native laws, a man can marry more than one wife and it is legal.

The court recognizes the marriage of a man to more then one woman as long as they were all done according to the native law and custom of his place.

Now, what can be done in this situation?
The name of the two heads of family can be in the said document.

If you are the first son of your mom, insist that his name and yours be on the survey document and all other subsequent documents

ambr055i:
Please, I need your advice because right now I'm confused about where to go, it's a lifelong decision.

I just turned 34 last month, still living with my uncle, but no pressure on his part is a big house. Currently, I teach in a school where my net salary and my home lesson inclusive are approx. N 100000 a month. I have a master's degree in engineering, so I haven't put that certificate to use. I have a saving of 900k, it will be higher by December. Although it would have been more than that, I lost 400,000 to the detriment of a bad investment. Last two years, I had an illness that struck (ENT related), which doesn't have a cure. One of the symptoms is vertigo (a sensation of feeling off-balance). This made me change my mind about travelling. For a few months now, I haven't had the experience.

I have three thoughts, but I can only do one at a time.

Firstly, leave my uncle's house, get an apartment. Use the rest of the money to start a business as a side hustle while working with the school.

Secondly, leave my uncle's house, get an apartment. Next, I invest my time in a tech skill (web dev, programming or data science).

Thirdly, travel to the US for my PhD program. I have already been preparing for my GRE before now.

Thank you.

What is your priority? Relationship?

My guy, don't let anybody pressure into leaving your uncle's house since he is not disturbing you.

If I'm in your shoes, I work my way out for PhD... when you come back, you will afford to stay in any apartment of your choice.

Meanwhile, start applying in places-private universities as a lecturer

Handsomejok:
I have a big problem � I separated with my wife because she was a witch and the cause of my downfall. I had the custody of our daughter who is now 1 years 6 months old.

After getting rid of the witch I taught my business will be better than before but no. Things become even hard for me I started experiencing body pain and unknown sickness and we have been to church where I was told my daughter Is a witch her mother has given her the mission to kill me.

After prayers and fasting my health is getting better now and I have been to 2 different churches just to confirm that my daughter is a witch and yes it is true. I have packed her stuffs and i took her to her mother but she is doesn't stay there anymore and I don't know her new address. I am not a wicked person but I don't want her in my house because I don't want to harm her and regret it. What do I have to do with a witch?

You are not st.upi.d. To call you st.upi.d will be to insult st.upid.ity. You lack the necessary requirements to exist on earth as human. You should be in the category of animals.

jobportng:
Good afternoon guys, so straight to the point guys.

I met this girl few months ago and we started talking, ended up asking her out, we started dating, at that time she told me she was single, honestly me too I was.

Fast forward to somedays back, she came to visit and we were cool and all suddenly she started having mood swings and all, I was worried, kept asking what is wrong and she always said nothing, surprisingly someone texted me on whatsapp and was telling me that she was dating her and many other talks, that night i almost had an heart attack. I was beyond surprised till now I am yet to recover from the shock.

When I asked her about the guy she first said that she doesn’t have any other person, when she knew it was very serious she then opened up to me, and told me she and the guy had issues and he broke up with her and that now the guy wants them to come back. I saw her chat with the guy, telling the guy she loves him and will never stop loving him bla bla and telling another person that she misses him but she has decided to stick with me because I've shown her so much love that no one has ever done, and honestly i love 10000%. I treat her like a queen.

Right now i am confused, i asked her now what do you want and she said she wants me, but then she still keeps communicating with the guy and the guy is in same state with her while me i'm far away from her, i don’t even know what do i'm so depressed i have never loved like this before and this is what is getting to me. I can’t even eat or sleep when i remember all of it, i confused if she wants me really or she’s just considering the fact that i'm wealthy.

Guys please constructive criticism are welcomed, please i need advice on what to do I’m madly confused.

You need this experience. This will probably be your first heartbreak, it won't kill you, it will make you less foolish.

Gandollar:
Bro, permit me to point out the typo in your post. It's toying, not toiling in this case. I have been seeing this error frequently recently. I guess nobody knows it all.

Thank you for the correction

Children who ought not to be in relationship toying with things bigger than them

What did I just read?

This left a sour taste in my tongue...

Maybe, we should help you beg the girl to be faithful to you!

Don't worry sir, you will soon post another one, the title this time will be...

"My fiance has finished me patapata"

You are dating a girl that only talks about celebrities and social media lifestyle? Is everything okay with you?

And to add insult to injury, she broke up with you and you are down?

You are one of the problems of this country.

The fact that you turned fraud, cheating and such likes into a gender thing shows how morally low you have fallen with the society.

Call out a wrong purely for what it is...

It's like someone writing "firstly, I don't support rape but women should be careful with what they wear".

Your writeup smacks of bitterness and support for evil

Go to the radio and TV stations and announce your love for her.

You are too immature to get married. If you do in this your childish and sheepish condition, the lady will finish you completely.

Someone is cheating on you and you are calling and begging?

Who raised you? Were you not brought up with an atom of dignity and self respect?

She is a classic manipulator and you are falling for it

od501:
Exactly, she did nothing. Which was why I sympathised with her in my fitdt comment. Too bad you have a poor reading habit. Read that again sir.

The fact you sympathized with her in your first comment and indirectly blamed her in the subsequent one, exonerates your warped thinking?

Your thinking is still warped sir

od501:
Sorry for your loss (if your story is true). But come to think of it, so you rather blame a people reacting to injustice than to blame the ones that penetrated the injustice?
Had the government not murder people with their jihadist military and police, will we be hearing about sit at home by now? How beat a child and ask him not to cry?
You should learn how to channel the blame right bro. Blame the perpetrators, not the victims. Your government is evil, they must stop killing people like animals.

Your thinking is warped. Reacting to injustice against their fellow Igbo? What did the woman at the restaurant do to enable the injustice?

If they want to fight injustice, can't they go to Aso rock?

SlayerForever:
The sit at home has been canceled for nearly a month now rest abeg.

Stop lying to yourself. Cancelled on paper, yet IPOB foot soldiers are enforcing it.

Gobdddd:
Strickly for the married

Good evening tweeps, my marriage is jerking. Needs a quick solution.

We married 9years ago.
She was a virgin in my Church. I am a pastor too.
Though we were not in the same state.
She was the first woman I had sex with after our marriage.
But I noticed that she has no interest in anything called sex.
She will not deny me sex, but I do not enjoy it because she's not enthused to it.

I have tried all I could to make her love sex, but all to no avail.
If you do not demand for sex, she'll not show any interest, even if you stay one year without talking about it.
And I am 100% sure that she's not seeing any man anywhere.

I took my time to educate her from the little research I made, but she wouldn't pay any serious attention.

I querried myself as to wether I do not satisfy her, on another point, sometimes, I'd last for 10-15 mins which, according to research is not bad.

Last night, I got angry at her attitude towards it. To me, she just try to open legs for me to satisfy myself and get down.

This has affected my psyche towards her.
But apart from her low libido, she is a very wonderful and good woman to be with.

So, last night, I opened up to her once again and told her she's making me to think twice and that am not happy at her actions.

Since today, our relationship has dwindled.

Alot of things have been going through my mind.

I don't know what to do. Am confused.
I can't go to another woman and leave such a good woman that have given me 4 kids.

Pls is there any known solution?

I need help.

You are a pastor and where you came for help is nairaland? You came to social media to ask for help I discourage secular people from seeking certain help on social media, talk more of a pastor!!!

Continue sir

Supreme145:
Good morning N'landers, I will make this post as brief and concise as possible.

Some months ago while I was home on break from school, I visited one of my in-laws that owns a school to introduce a software to him for his school. The man complained that I was too distant from him, citing how I never call him or ask him for favours whenever I'm in school. I told him I will reach out to him more often.

I told my mom about my visit and she told me without mincing words to resist collecting money from the man. My mom is the religious type and has been skeptical about the man's source of wealth.

When school resumed things were difficult at home and I couldn't resume school. I spent close to three months after resumption at home due to lack of funds.
Note that since my admission from my first year to my final year, I've never asked any relative for help no received any help from anyone aside my immediate family.

I lost my resolve not to ask for help when my project supervisor called me and scolded me over the phone for my inability to resume school. I sent the man a text soliciting for help, he sent me 5k which I added to the little I had and resumed school. I didn't tell my mom because I knew she won't be happy about it.

In school things were so hard for me, during a particular period I went almost one week living on just water, that period I'm sure I would eaten food sacrificed to a deity if I had access to one. I called the man again and he reluctantly sent me 4k after many calls and text messages.

This early morning I got a phone call from my mom, she was crying over the phone. She was hurt and said I betrayed her because I went behind her back to collected money from a man she told me to avoid. She said that singular act of mine has destroyed all her efforts and prayers to break us free from bondage. I tired to explain that the money wasnt a physical cash hence it has no effect on me but to no avail. She said I've broken her for life and she would never forgive me.

I have a very close relationship with my mom and everything she told me really hurt me and I'm confused on the action to take. I am 28 but I hardly hide anything from her, I didn't tell her about the money because I know she wouldn't approve of it and I needed it. This is the first time any relative has contributed to my education ever. I don't even know how she got to know.

Please how do I pacify her and get her to forgive me? I really love my mom and can't bear to see her this heartbroken.

This is your mom and I will be very civil.
Your mom is religiously sentimental. The solution is not to pacify her but to help her come out of such a notion. It is toxic.

For her to say she won't forgive you, you betrayed her trust just because a relative she's suspicious of gave you money, is toxic. You didn't steal, kill or any of such.

Preciousgirl:
My friend and I decided to prank her husband and later prank my husband too

So we arranged that we would strip to just pant and bra and lay in her matrimonial bed around a time her husband is likely to return from job

We did just that, all meant to create laughter, come on we can't be lesbo

He entered the room and saw us hugged and touching. He was mad at us. We tried explaining but he would have none of that. He has left home since.

Please advise, it was just a prank

If this story is true...

How on earth, in all your thought processes, did you come to the conclusion that pretending to be lesbians will evoke laughter from a husband?

Were you people that bored you didn't think of any other thing that will evoke laughter except pretending to be lesbians?

You stripped almost naked in another man's house? He saw you in pant and bra?

Start by staying away from that man's wife... You are probably a bad influence.

focus7:
Women with age falsification, Funmi Iyanda by my record should be 54 not 50years old.

Happy fathers' day Sir.

Papa Funmi

Timibraun0010:
I'm not one to come online for advice but then you can never know it all.
/
The Genesis:

We were neighbours. She was a student while I was done with school and already working. To some extent I will say we were close at least closer than other lodge mates. I do spend time in her room and she do same in my room but there was nothing intimate or even the thought of that.

She is a good girl in and out and one spending my life with is something I look forward to. We do talk about things, just like any other friend friend would do. In terms of relationship, she was in one then but later had to breakup due to genotype mismatch while I was single.

Interlude : Graduation/ Corona Period

She is done with school and have returned home to Abeokuta while I have moved out to a new place but we still communicate very well. On 3 occasions she came to my place early this year but for school clearance and defence. She stayed at my place all through, helped out with all necessary things.

The Present

She was here for the Sallah break at my place as well. Before her visit, we talk virtually everyday and I think I've know her to a reasonable extent ( you can't know some fully ). Let's say I developed feelings on not wanting to lose a good woman. I was sure of my feelings for her but not sure of hers for me.

Thus, it became a battle of the mind. To ask her out or not to ask her. While one part of me believed she won't accept, the other part remains resolute that it would be a greater regret if I lose a good woman based on self doubt of if she will accept or not. At the end I did the "needful" and obviously the result wasn't as I expected.

For her she has always been real with me , do things and say things and what she has for me was love but as a friend. And this coming in now has complicated things and she's sure things won't be the same again.

Left for me, rejection is part of life and on my part emotional detachment is simple and would continue with her like nothing ever happened or no word was ever said.

How do I deal with the awkwardness that will arise in the coming days cos we haven't talked over the phone since the cat was let out of the bag.

Every relationship must not lead to a 'relationship'. As men we need to understand that.

You need to let her know that there doesn't have to be an awkwardness. That you understand her point of view and wouldn't want it to affect things.

Endeavor to call her as usual, let her know you will be there for her when necessary but don't let her take advantage of the rejection and start disrespecting you.

ebijimi7:
Good day guys
I'm in a dilemma right now,
I have a girlfriend in which we have been dating for the past 2 years
I met her july 2018 and asked her to be my girlfriend by December 2018 after I broke up with my ex just because my ex was so confused she doesn't know what she wanted and my ex was just 21 as at that time and this age group phase is what most guys here call that hoeing phase��, so back to the story as I was narrating, so I met this girl we started our journey everything looks so perfect she was gentle,calm,obedient,respectful.
So when I saw all these qualities I felt Gof has compensated me with someone better than who I left just because I had good heart and good intentions towards my ex,
So the love story was interesting and sweet, I spoilt my girlfriend with gift, money and surprises because I was happy I found love again, but I wasn't too convinced she can be as sweet as she is is making herself look,
So one day I called her and tell her that "baby is this really your attitude or you are just pretending" she told me uts her real attitude and that's how her attitude is like that she is not pretending I felt relaxed after hearing that.
Lo and behold after 6 months of relationship and after pretending for 6 months the beast in her surfaced
And that is when we started having issues.
And what are the issues?
Issues like me promising to help her out with some funds but if I can't make it up to her just because something else comes up she would flare up scream at me shout at me telling me I breach agreement and plans without even asking me for the reason why it happened.
This continues like this until I called her to come see me let's hang out.
From which during the hang out I asked her a question that do you really love me?
She said yes,
Then I went further u told her that the way you are doing when it comes to money in this relationship you are making me feel like you don't like me but you are just after my money .
On hearing this she got mad and left my presence then I ran after her to meet her that she doesn't have to do that, but she didn't even mind me and she went home in anger then that same day I started calling but she refused to pick my call and didn't call me back so I made up my mind that if after 3rd day no call from her I would end the relationship.

The two of you are childish.

You ran after her

Who is raising this kind of guys

Aliyu007:
You don't even know the meaning of envy lol.
Forget about getting my miserable ass busy, I go feed you and your unborn children till they die of old age.

Taaaaaa.. Feed who? Oga go and feed yourself.

Focus on all those northern ritualists. Unless you are actually the one envying him

PrinceOfLagos:
Southerners

There surely will be this type of unfortunate comment!

mario22:
My fiancé anger issue is worrisome to me. ones she has a bad day, I will get my own share at home. i have begged her all i need in this marriage is togetherness, peace (she jokingly calling me Mr. peace of mind).

She just graduated and we are staying together for 2months now. She can be very sweet and hardworking, caring, can clean, arrange the house. i don't expect her to be this all good cos NOBODY is perfect, but her anger issue a big turn off.
When her Project supervisor was purposely frustrating her, and told her he will not accept her work and she will not defend (it was sorted out later) . i tried to talk and advise her she angrily walked out of my car in d middle of the road.

That night she wasn't talking to me and i started a call n went to the parlor, she came and was asking whom i was talking to and i said my guy, she queried but why did i go the parlor, she flung our engagement ring away without knowing whom i was talking to (not cheating or calling any girl) she make rash decisions when angry. like She can scatter our 2weeks plans cos of a small provocation.
I Love her but the anger issues is killing.

Firstly, you are in love and advising a person in love is like trying to save a drowning man... He drags you to his level. He needs to drown first before you can save him. Your heart needs to be scattered first before you can listen to advice.

That girl will deal with you but that's not a problem... You will bear it (remember, you are in love). She will show you pepper with that her anger issues... But you will bear.

You will still come back to this platform after marriage to post "I love my wife but her anger issues" and you will still receive the same advice that will now be too late.

You know what to do but you want to shift the responsibility of your action to nairalanders.

Let me tell you sorry in advance for the big problem you will have in marriage if you end up marrying this girl.

Zeal0000007:
I don beat her tire my hand don bend.

You lost me here... You beat for what Sex? Who on earth is raising these children?

TheGidRedpiller:
KiNg0G Check the people this idiot is following, make screenshots and put it in your simps 101 thread!

Hahahhahahhaha... Only him? Call for more helps sir... You need it

TheGidRedpiller:
Guys, go to this idiot's profile and check the people he's following. Come back lets laugh at how much of a simp he is!

At least I'm following humans... While you keep making up stories to soothe your bruised nonexistent ego.

TheGidRedpiller:
This legit happened yesterday afternoon
So i was on my way somewhere and the lane i was walking was lonely obviously because its a narrow road and this aunty was walking right in front of me with her flat ass that she's really trying to expose by all means, i'm saying this because of the kind of tight shorts she was wearing

Welling getting into the main details, her purse fell off from her backpack and even though i don't like engaging biittches i still thought of getting her attention to it, so i picked it up and tried calling her with "Aunty", this is where the real comedy starts
Instead of looking back to what i was calling her for, she just slightly turned her face to the side like i was walking side by side with her and rudely said "WHAT IS IT" You just know when some biittch is being rude with the positioning of her face and the tenacity of her voice At that point i already knew whats up, i already understood what she was expecting from me..

Still Typing...

You are the kind of person that will order for a cake for his birthday and claim that a girl chasing you ordered it but you are not interested.


Keep daydreaming to massage your ego.

Keep up with the lies