₦airaland Forum

@omonakoda,

Reading material-

women in yoruba history

Wole soyinkas -death and the kings horseman(said to be based on a true life incident)

So you don't use the left hand to describe the yoruba pple.

@omonaakoda,

Iyaloja's have always been a part of the kings council,long before the british and after the british rule till date.

Pls note regardless of diff in beliefs as regards the origin of the yorubas in diverse areas of the yoruba kingdom,there remains a market similarity in the system of governance.

Pls note every Yoruba province as an oja oba,be it ijebu,akure,ekiti,or lagos.and every ojo oba has an iyaloja that sits on the kings council.

What defines a soceity is its cultural identity,I dare say some of it which we have lost is responsible for the recent social vices that seem to be cropping up.

The Iyaloja and Iyalode are notable influential and powerful positions in yorubaland,they control the markets and the economy via their rule over the market associations and those associations have the power to set the inflation rate and scarcity.

This particular Iyaloja welded her influence and position in the face of modern oppression and we heard of no flagrant abuse of her power,pls read efunsetan aniwura.

If the people honour her by closing the market for a day which in customs is indeed her due,the least we could all do is respect this custom of the pple,their loss and hold our peace.

That's said this piece has inspired me to ensure my kids read at least 2 books on the history of our people lest they be like the ones that use the left hand to describe their fathers house.you know what they say about them.

Senator Adeyemi has no class,and his actions at this event shows no taste either.

I applaud senator tinubus decorum and Mallam Nasir El- rufai's quiet solidarity,that's a taste of the new nigeria folks,not that kingdom divided against itself.watch it fall come 2015,and great will be that fall.

This is not the first time a market in lagos has been shut down to honour its market leaders demise.its not possible to give names,as its obvious no one is really interested in market politics as such,one just remembers the inconvienience that's all.

For the guy that has stayed 15 yrs,its posible she has had the position for longer than that or no overall state market leader died during that period.

It is good to respect the culture of the people,old or new however it may be.

I just couldn't pass by,had to log in to drop a comment,Supermum sniper-in-a-diaper....

May you find strength all the way in this journey,and may your wonderful kids reward your labour of love.

@ OP,I take a bow as I say thank you....and keep ur blog going strong,a place where singleparents can find advice and help.since naija snoots won't offer a finger to help.

Pls consider single parents,not just mums.some men raise kids without their mothers too,let's not marginalize.

[quote author=charles424]This post is disheartening....is the OP encouraging single parenting Omg!!!...Our women of today are so reckless in that the moment they get a kid,forget all that make dem a real woman to her man..Then women of nowadays love money more than their life..I have so many spiritual instances to butress my point NO to single parenting..

Guy you are just a bunch of contradictions,single parents men or women are capable of raising great kids,it has everything to do with the individual and Gods grace not their relationship status.

You remind me of the proverbial pharisee that is not on the path and will not let others be,even Jesus did not condem the woman in adultery how your own come be? Whether by choice or by chance there will always be single parents in our society,if you can't support them with kindness either by words or deeds,then by all means be quiet and don't make their lives more difficult with ur hypocrital judgemental stand.

Op I'm with you on this post,empower your kids in everyway possible,teach them their success is your success.

My observation,kids from single parents are mostly independent,mature and goal oriented early in life while their mates are clowning away....

damiso: Geeez.Nigerians can be judgemental.Gosh

My sentiments exactly, judgemental hypocrites that's what the majority of nigerians are.

Whether a woman decides to raise her family alone or with a man,its really nobody's bussiness to label her good or bad.Its her life and her choice which must be respected.

Truth is most Nigerian families leave the responsibility of raising kids solely with the mothers,so a lot of "married" homes actually raise single parent kids add that to the outrageous runaway/absentee dads in Nigeria courtsey of multiple wife scenario,parents living in two diff cities,men shirking their responsibilities etc amongst others,then u see the truth is in Africa,the woman raises the kids.

The single mother should be encouraged to do a good job,strengthened and helped by others when possible not condemmed.

No one should blame her really,her survival,I.e ability to feed clothe herself etc and her identity in soceity most likely depends on that,rather we should encourage younger ones who have no family fortune to fall back on not to attempt marriage without empowering themselves.Its the fastest route to been destitute.

That said I've seen many stories like this,wives of mighty men in society,with no means of living and,no money, they'll tell u they don't own 10000 naira of their own,but their husbands will buy the most exp things for them.They all say they stay for their children,but....women empower yourselfs before marriage,treat yourself with respect or no one else will.

May God keep our troop safe, everyone of them, grant them success, and keep their hearts from evil.Amen

Revolva: Banky W..looks so comfortable....he went to the best school abroad and has so much connection....and opportunities..am sure his lifestyle and music. especially does not speaks for the average Nigerian the suffering masses...so Good luck to him.. with his speech @ Oxford...whatever..dat wont put Garri on an average Fan table....jare...na dem sabi....
much respect to Sound sultan, Femi kuti Seun Kuti, Tuface.....Idristhey've succeeded in ruining the quiet ambience of my hal ....and more of them that uses their music to torment the government

Music is about art, that conference was on the impact of african arts.Do you guyz read up about this things before you comment at all? Did you see an excerpt of the speech? Try to,and pls note ur school or circumstance is not what limits you in life,its your thinking process that does.

Banky W is one of the few artists with proven patroitic interest above self.He has spoken out against bad governance many times at a risk to his carrear in the music industry,He spoke up against subsidy,and bad governance,he sided with the masses,he came out and spoke not just release a filmsy press statement,He did the famous change video that played after amanpours jonathan interview,the one y'all hailed,

He started a Mr capable foundation which has awarded so many scholarships and done lots of good work in Nigeria.

I hate it when people criticize blindly,a simple google search would have helped,lastly he gave an intelligent speech @ that conference a risk I won't take with most Nigerian artists,when I heard he was the one nominated,I wasn't afraid of him embarrasing the nation and in turn,he repped naija.

Give respect where it is due people,Banky W has earned his name and place as a patroit.

maximunimpact: Based on my opinion, as I have written. U can say urs, u have the right to it

dont mind them,
Buhari all the way.....


nice post,way to go.
pls edit thread title,its corruption right?

Billyonaire: You are right, so right. Little wonder that GEJ is always quiet while the chronic losers jump like frogs from blogs to cyber forums spewing irreconcilable propensities! Guess who gets burnt when one picks up a HOT COAL in the arm to throw at the enemies ? The carrier gets burnt first. GEJ is here, and will be here till 2019. There is NOTHING any opposition can do
about it. NOTHING!!!

But you have forgotten,that God rules in the affairs of men,he gives the kingdom to whoever he chooses,He raises up one and brings low another,and he hears the cry of the poor, also remember that he who sows the wind will surely reap a whirlwind....remember as you sit in the place of judgement.

The lady came out told her story uncensored to motivate the young ones,a true story that poverty is real and drives people to survive in unconventional ways.

I have heard this kind of story many times,In Nigeria it is real, where mothers expect and encourage their children to survive or get ahead in life by patronage from men and sometimes feed and help siblings and family this way,

She came out told her story.How she survived.It doesn't make her love her mother less,or honour her less,it just meant she choose a better way,succeeded and told her story...

Let us not criticize her,kaffy,you have my respect,way to go.

Why would any young Dr want to be a peadiatrician and stay in Nigeria to practice clinical medecine,Let's all be sincere,what incentive does he or she have.if he or she does not regret it during residency By the time he/she looks @ himself or herself in 10yrs he'll def regret the decision.

Only married woman take up such endevour this days,they don't depend on their job to keep their families,the guys all leave a year or 2 after NYSC or switch professions outrightly.

And if it continues this way,Nigeria will soon be begging for gp's to practice.In most places Its Nysc that's still saving the day so don't be ambitious asking for paediatricians,treat the ones you have well.

People,this is not acceptable,it must not be condoned not to talk of celebrated.The nation should weep,not rejoice @ this let us condem the killing of 185 men women and children of our country without fair trial.

Boston showed us an example,the city was closed down in 30mins.....why have they not declared a state of emmergency in borno,why are we so immune to the death suffering and this plight of others,where are our human feelings.

Imagine loosing all members of your families in one day,and friends,Imagine a child with no family,with no help,what seeds are we sowing for "peace"
If a tactical assault will lead to loss of lots of innocent lives and properties it must receive clearance from the highest authority.who gave clearance,was there a better way? This are the questions here while we weep for borno,and the flag flies @ half mast.

ufotuko: shey make I carry u go cnn make you pour out your feelings to them instead of ranting on nairaland like woman wey dem cut one of her breast for public....or better still let me give u princess phone number so that u can call her instead of spitting on the thread

Clowns like you are not worth joining issues with on any forum.

If we all want a new nigeria,we must reject mediocrity,dishonour and abject foolishness from people we place in positions of influence and public figures.

I insist she was at an occasion which should be celebrating the strength and success of the Nigerian woman in a hundred years,her "joke" was irresponsible and in poor taste considering the ocassion and what it stood for and the fact that Nigerian women find it acceptable is disturbing.

Silly woman she is.some things should not be joked with,its a very sensitive topic for most.

Invariably @ the celebration of 100 yrs of the nigerian woman she "jokes" about how been a single woman is a thing of shame she is glad to have escaped.

In a country where we all know the aged single woman carries an unspoken stigma which society is sometimes unkind enough to verbalize in many ways like she just did.Joke or not that statement was irresponsible and insensitive and holding her accountable in the courts of public opinion is the least we all can do.Like I said earlier,very silly woman.

RUN Buhari RUN!

A voice of rejoicing is heard in our tents and in our camp,It is the voice of them that make merry,the voice of them that rejoice,May our God heal our land and give his people peace.

Your people remain loyal sir.May God go with you.

This matter is not worthy of a reply,however evil thrives when good men are silent,so I will say my bit for posterity...

There is a code of honor,of justice,of truth one would expect from leadership.Imagine the spokesperson of any reputable country or institution issuing such a statement with no burden of proof.even criminals are called suspects till proven.

There is a code of honor even amongst thieves,If this statement credited to this spokesperson is true,then leadership has reached an all time low indeed and there is no honor in the villa and its sit of power,shameful thing it is.

They dare not say this officially in written or verbal form,by mistake or deliberately.We Team General Buhari will sue them for everything they are worth,carry the day in court and get a public apology for such behaviour.

But then give abati and co kudos,they've not been reduced to that yet,but the forty laptop squad,those ones are something else.Even amongst thieves,there is honour,but them.....

the board is trying to to do its job,so the records show it was censored.

That said,I know this documentary is on the AMAA 2013 nomination list so the censorship thing is just an "eye service".

I've not seen it yet,but I believe a nation must document its history for posterity.Why hide who we are,its like the emperors new clothes,where we all whitewash truth with denial.when all was needed was a simple mirror.

Perhaps if we take a look at ourselves objectively,see what we have let ourselves become as a nation,maybe it will be the voice for the millions we have oppressed and smothered into silence,its possible it can inspire in us the will to bring about the change in attitude and national values we so yearn for.If this documentary can do that,then it is a good thing censorship will not have the power to stop.

And Gen buhari stayed up all night,kudos to you sir,great job there.

Scores so far,
Buhari Likes-310 still counting,

Gej crew(+multiple I'd's)-Less than 40 likes.

Makes me realize,less than 40 pple have been criticizing Buhari again and again on this 18 pgs,while 310 have liked,

Also factoring multiple ids the known paid perrogative of crew pdp that brings 50pple to say 20?

Our point has been made,The General remains a sought after candidate,The challenge my people now is how do we ensure a credible fair election 2015.Victory comes with preparation.let's find a way early to make this happen.

Let's Focus pple,the question is simple,will you vote for General Buhari-240 likes still counting,the pro GEJ folks with confirmed multiple Ids are yet to garner 100 likes.

Let's pretend its a microsm of society,statistics are there too show,haters hate all you want,comment with multiple ids if u wish, Buhari has his confirmed sure followers who are non muslims,non northerners waiting to vote 2015.

PDP pple,mission accomplished,hurry back and report to ur masters.

and in excess doses causes Parkinson like disease.
problem is therapeutic index has not been determined.
Compren tu?

General Buhari has my vote, that of my friends, family and those I will hopefully beg and influence to vote for him 2015 except he endorses another candidate.

put the thread on front page if its statistics you want and see.last election, a lot of young upwardly mobile Christian professionals voted for him. yes in lagos. and theres a lot of us on the net you know, enough to match the gej supporters on nairaland that put us in this mess and are not ashamed.

Don't forget to add the uneducated northerners you all so despise without realizing a solution only comes when you have a leader who takes the bull by the horn and solves the problems of all.

General Muhamadu Buhari (yes that's General to you)has my vote,
2015 cant come soon enough.

I"m worried as a pple we have been so beaten we now have poor self esteem.

The issue here is simple, a south African hotel put a notice saying Nigerians not allowed, that is documented discrimination if true, we should be discussing diplomatic resolution of the matter, or principle of reciprocal gesture .e.g Imagine Nigerian hotels or businesses saying south Africans not allowed? even if they don't use there...and they come to naija a lot.

whether it was put there because of the corrupt, poor, or agbero Nigerian or not ,the point is such discrimination against our kindred, yes our people anywhere in the world for any reason should not be tolerated or considered permissible.

Saw this article somewhere,my exact thoughts on many issues in Nigeria,e.g the oga " the top matter,on militancy and others,its like someone put in words articulately this nigerian factor.hope you enjoy reading it like i did,hope it inspires us to correct mediocrity wherever we can.


That Nigeria Rewards Mediocrity- Femke Van Zeiji



I used to think corruption was Nigeria’s biggest problem, but I’m starting to doubt that. Every time I probe into one of the many issues this country is encountering, at the core I find the same phenomenon: the widespread celebration of mediocrity. Unrebuked underachievement seems to be the rule in all facets of society. A governor building a single road during his entire tenure is revered like the next Messiah; an averagely talented author who writes a colourless book gets sponsored to represent Nigerian literature overseas; and a young woman with no secretarial skills to speak of gets promoted to the oga’s office faster than any of her properly trained colleagues.

Needless to say the politician is probably hailed by those awaiting part of the loot he is stealing; the writer might have got his sponsorship from buddies he has been sucking up to in hagiographies paid for by the subjects; and the young woman’s promotion is likely to be an exchange for sex or the expectancy of it. So some form of corruption plays a role in all of these examples.

But corruption per se does not necessarily stand in the way of development. Otherwise a country like Indonesia—number 118 on Transparency International’s Corruption Perception Index, not that far removed from Nigeria’s 139—would never have made it to the G-20 group of major economies. An even more serious obstacle to development is the lack of repercussions for underachievement. Who in Nigeria is ever held accountable for substandard performance?

Since I came here, I have been on a futile search for a stable internet connection that does what it promises. I started with an MTN FastLink modem (I consider the name a cruel joke), and then I moved on to an Etisalat MiFi connection (I regularly had to keep myself from throwing the bloody thing against the wall), and now I am trying out Cobranet’s U-Go. I shouldn’t have bothered: equally crap. And everyone knows this. They groan and mutter and tweet about it. But still, to my surprise, no one calls for a class-action suit against those deceitful providers.

A one-day conference I attended last year left me equally puzzled. Organisation, attendance and outcome left a lot to be desired, if you ask me. But over cocktails, after the closing ceremony, everyone congratulated each other over the wonderful conference—that started two hours late, of which the most animated part was undeniably lunch, and in which not a single tangible decision had been made. This left me wondering whether we had attended the same event.

I thought these issues to be unrelated at first, but gradually I came to see the connection. Nigeria is the opposite of a meritocracy: you do not earn by achieving. You get to be who and where you are by knowing the right people. Whether you work in an office, for an enterprise or an NGO, at a construction site or in government, your abilities hardly ever are the reason you got there. Performing well, let alone with excellence, is not a requirement, in fact, it is discouraged. It would be too threatening: showing you’re more intelligent, capable or competent than the ‘oga at the top’ (who, as a rule, is not an overachiever either) is career suicide.

It is an attitude that trickles down from the very top, its symptoms eventually showing up in all of society, from bad governance to bad service to bad craftsmanship.

Where excellence meets no gratification, what remains to be celebrated is underachievement. That is why it is not uncommon to find Nigerians congratulating each other with substandard results. It is safer to cuddle up comfortably in shared mediocrity than to question it, since the latter might also expose your own less than exceptional performance. Add to this the taboo of criticising anyone senior or higher up and it explains why so many join in the admiration of the emperor’s new clothes.

I have been writing this column for the last year, and after ten months I realised my angles were getting more predictable and my pieces less edgy. I figured newcomers do not remain newcomers forever and therefore decided to round up the ‘Femke Becomes Funke’ series this month, a year after it started. Ever since I announced the ending, tweeps have been asking me to change my mind and in comments on the columns and through my website I get songs of praise that make me feel my analyses of Nigerian society are indispensable. If I had no sense of self-criticism, I might be tempted to reconsider my decision to discontinue the series and start producing second-rate articles. Who would point this out to me if I did?

The hardest thing to do in Nigeria is to continue to realise there is honour in achievement and pride in perfection. I imagine the frustration of the many Nigerians who do care for their work, who take pride in their outcomes and who feel the award is in a job well done. When you know beforehand that excellence will not be rewarded, you are bound to do the economically sane thing and limit your investments to accomplishing the bare minimum. This makes Nigeria a pretty cumbersome place for anyone striving for perfection.

By Femke Van Zeijl

and since we are on this topic,I must add my observations....On a recent trip to the niger delta region,I saw pple accord respect that was shrouded in fear and awe to the pple they described as millitants,they got vip treatment like they were super humans.I saw jobless youths and no jobs,My friend I was visiting had once been kidnapped and had paid a ransom,the only other person I knew in town had also been kidnapped in the past also paid a ransom,it appeared there was no motivation in this town for the youths to work to earn legitimate pay,crime obviously has been institutionalized.All because the authorities rewarded wrong.

So the hardworking,honest Niger delta guy earning 200,000 naira and struggling to build his life while paying his bills and earning a honest living is regarded as unsuccesfull and a failure,and the unemployed ones....well they find money to spend somehow.And it appeared majority had emmigrated away from there.

by granting this amnesty to the millitants and actually paying them,the nation has rewarded violence and set a trend for the future,that violence pays.The militancy issue is like the hydra head with tentacles far reaching than amnesty can truly solve.This very system that rewards crime and condems hardwork and justice must be condemed today so we all can live without looking over our shoulders tommorow.so our children can have a place to call home without fear.